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Aussie Government Offers $40M To Build a Bionic Eye

Posted by timothy on from the the-6-million-dollar-man-should-cash-in dept.

An anonymous reader writes "The Australian Government is keen to replicate the success of the Cochlear Implant (bionic ear) by throwing AU$50M (US$40M) of funding at the development of a bionic eye. Bionic eyes have been trialed with some success in the UK — with recipients able to detect senses of shape and space, but very little detail."

6 of 89 comments (clear)

  1. Just give me a week and I'll have it to you by elrous0 · · Score: 3, Funny

    Fortunately, I was already digging up Jaime Sommers' corpse for other uses.

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    SJW: Someone who has run out of real oppression, and has to fake it.
    1. Re:Just give me a week and I'll have it to you by Archangel+Michael · · Score: 2, Funny

      Idiot. She didn't have a Bionic eye. She had Bionic Hearing. It was Steve Austin that had the Bionic Eye.

      Oh, and you're sick!

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      Agent K: A *person* is smart. People are dumb, stupid, panicky animals, and you know it.
    2. Re:Just give me a week and I'll have it to you by Culture20 · · Score: 2, Funny

      Fortunately, I was already digging up Jaime Sommers' corpse for other uses.

      Oh, and you're sick!

      He's a forensics expert. What's so sick about.. oh, now I get what you thought he meant. Who would want to use a corpse for the carpool lane? You're sick!

  2. As predicted by JoCo by JCSoRocks · · Score: 4, Funny

    I'll see her standing by the monorail
    She'll look the same except for bionic eyes
    She lost the real ones in the robot wars
    I'll say I'm sorry, she'll say it's not your fault
    Or is it?
    She'll eye me suspiciously
    Hearing the whir of the servos inside
    And she'll scream and try to run
    But there's nowhere she can hide
    When a crazy cyborg wants to make you his robot bride

    Well it's gonna be the future soon
    And I won't always be this way
    When the things that make me weak and strange get engineered away
    It's gonna be the future soon
    I've never seen it quite so clear
    And when my heart is breaking I can close my eyes and it's already here

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  3. Re:Wrong Approach? by TypoNAM · · Score: 4, Funny
    I figured it out!
    1. Create bionic eye
    2. patent bionic eye
    3. Stab peoples' eyes out at random!
    4. PROFIT!!!
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    This space is not for rent.
  4. Re:Won't this fail for simple biological reasons? by Shatrat · · Score: 2, Funny

    Our current level of understanding and experience with neurobiology precludes brain transplants, which in turn precludes eye transplants.

    This is backwards. You're saying that because we don't have the tools to replace the engine, we can't replace the spark plugs.

    Car analogy to the rescue.

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