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Lawyer Offers $1M For Proof His Client Could Have Done It; Oops
A Florida attorney, Cheney Mason, made the mistake of offering a million dollars on a TV show to anyone who could prove that his client, Nelson Ivan Serrano, was able to travel across two states and kill four people in the time that prosecutors had alleged. Having a lot of free time, South Texas College of Law graduate Dustin Kolodziej decided to take Mason up on his dare. Dustin traveled the route prosecutors say Serrano took, completed the trip under the time allowed, and videotaped the whole process. He is now suing Mason in the federal district court — because the attorney doesn't want to pay, saying that his statement was just a joke.
Should make politics more interesting. Who is in with me for a few class-action suits? $1 a share, excellent ROI.
The lawyer is a complete twit for basing a defense of his client on something that can (and has) been easily disproved.
The lawyer compounds his own stupidity by making a large cash offer for someone to prove him wrong.
Someone does that and asks for the money, and the lawyer puts the final nail is his coffin of bozo-ness by claiming it was just a joke all along. Ha ha, who wouldn't laugh at a trial of a man accused of four murders! Oh, those long nights must fly by with such hilarity!
ROFL ROFL!! That is SO funny and SO fresh. lol *wiping tears from eyes*
Will jokes about past vice presidents ever grow old?? We can only hope not, else would miss hilarious gems like this one!
No.
...combining the worst points of Dick Cheney and Perry Mason...
Harvard Law School is thinking on teaching a class in shutting the hell up.
who prays for Satan? Who in 18 centuries has had the humanity to pray for the 1 sinner that needed it most? ~Mark Twain
Nope.
Dustin Kolodziej did not kill four people.
Contract not fulfilled.
Sig Battery depleted. Reverting to safe mode.
"I may not be a fancy big New York Country Lawyer or anything,"
The lawyer wasn't a big New York Country Lawyer either.
There's a /reason/ why Fark has a Florida tag.
--
BMO
Plus, everyone knows you're not supposed to believe anything until its been posted on at least two different blogs. TV just isn't a reliable source of information anymore.
Internets killed the video star, I see. :P
Rampant carbon sequestration destroyed the Dinosaurs' tropical paradise. I'm here to help repair the damage.
And given your sig, I would trust you on this one...
Look out!
This is the guy
you must be new here :)
It pays to be obvious, especially if you have a reputation for being subtle.
Well, I would climb the pole and then ask for the naked 1000 bucks.
Ezekiel 23:20
i see you've put quite a bit of thought into this. maybe we should meet up to, you know, compare notes? we might make more progress working together...
weinersmith
When you live in America's wang, you probably can't escape being a dick.
We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
There is a reason why L-A-W-Y-E-R sounds like L-I-A-R.
Is it because they both start in L, end in R and contain an I or a Y, both of which have similar phonetic properties?
This is fun! I'll try some:
There's a reason why PDF file sounds like pedophile.
There's a reason why cheese sounds like she's.
There's a reason why icicles sounds like bicycles.
Obviously anyone who uses Adobe products should be sent to jail, women are a basic ingredient for pizza, and you should always wear thermal underwear when you go cycling.
which is totally what she said
Knock Knock
Who's there?
OJ
OJ Who?
Okay, you're on the jury.
Is there a reason why 'orange' doesn't sound like anything else?
No sig today...
Country doesn't have to mean a nation, it can just mean countryside, of which the state of New York surely has some..
That would be news to many dwellers of The City....
Does anybody really care which one of these lawyer scumbags prevails?
Research shows that 67% of those who use the term "research shows", are just making shit up.
I lived in America's wang for 5 years. Now I live in America's hand. I'd much rather receive a hand job than give one.
What of US Naval Commander Henry Honychurch Gorringe, the captain of the USS Gettysburg who discovered Gorringe Ridge in 1875? (lifted straight from Wikipedia).
Also Blorenge Hill in Wales.
Do proper nouns count if we're not playing Scrabble?
It's all fun and games until a 200' robot dinosaur shows up and trashes Neo-Tokyo... Again
Is a vial criminal one that steals test tubes?
I can tell you that, believe it or not, attorneys have far higher ethical standards than what you propose.
That's right. Don't let the actions of a mere 95% of the practitioners of the field sway you into believing that all lawyers believe "the end justifies the means."
John
If I go out on a public place and shout: "Whoever comes here first takes 20 bucks!!!", does that make me obliged by law to give 20 bucks to the faster (and dumper) who runs to me? Which law is that? The "You Said It Now" Act ???
I think that one falls under The I Don't Want This Crowd of Angry People to Break My Legs Act of 1879, which was upheld in Sambrowski v. Oh, God, Here, Please Just Take the Money and Stop.
When I first heard that Cheney had shot his friend, I immediately declared him my personal hero. Not that I like Cheney, mind you -- quite the contrary. But I had recently stated to several friends that someone should just pick up a gun and just start shooting republicans in the face, and that the person who did would be my personal hero.
So, I was obligated. I just never imagined it would be HIM.
Was he able to make it to the gym in 26 minutes too?
Give me Classic Slashdot or give me death!
Or he could just do what my 12 year old son does whenever he bets me on something and loses - "Oh, I said I'd give you a million "doll hairs". Let me go get those for you"
MG
This reminds me of the origins of the word "irregardless". Of course, many English Nazis will tell you that this is not a word. But I disagree! During the War of 1812, many guard ships that were stationed in the Great Lakes were diverted to the Gulf of Mexico to fight the British. This alarmed the residents of New York who, fearing a British attack, questioned the intelligence of leaving the Erie Guardless.
P.S. The spell checker thinks irregardless is not misspelled. :-/
Disconnect your television. Do your own research. Draw your own conclusions. They're probably lying. Don't be a sheep.
Okay. Maybe I should judge this man's guilt or innocence based on what I don't know about the facts that were presented in a trial I didn't attend.