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Celebrate Your Next Birthday At the Microsoft Store

Posted by ryuzaki0 on from the innovation-on-display dept.

theodp writes "Chuck E. Cheese, meet Bill H. Gates. A leaked PowerPoint posted at Gizmodo provides a glimpse of what Microsoft's retail shops may look like, noting that you'll even be able to pay to celebrate your birthday there. Some of the stores that were profiled for ideas were Nike, Nokia, Sony, Apple, and AT&T. Microsoft's take on the Genius Bar is the Answers Bar (aka Guru Bar, Windows Bar)."

9 of 301 comments (clear)

  1. Bday! by ShakaUVM · · Score: 5, Funny

    "...noting that you'll even be able to pay to celebrate your birthday there."

    Will it include, complementary, one or two members of the Vista dev team that decided to break the reasonably good UI in Windows XP? Or one of the Office guys that thought getting rid of menus would be a great idea?

    Because then I'd pay to have my birthday party there.

    Oh, yes.

    1. Re:Bday! by Norsefire · · Score: 5, Funny

      Or one of the Office guys that thought getting rid of menus would be a great idea?

      They'll be there.

      They need someone to put the ribbon on the presents.

  2. 2 Things: by SilverHatHacker · · Score: 5, Funny
    a) How much will a birthday party cost? I'm thinking:
    • ~$250 for the party (If you're 'upgrading' from last year's party, it's only $130)
    • For an extra $50, you can get "special features" which they will eventually be rolled out...we promise :)
    • $45 dollars for a cake, which can be eaten by a maximum of 3 people. If you want more people to eat it, you have to buy another 'cake-eating license'
    • A complimentary grab-bag of malware for every guest

    b) I wonder if they'd object if I stood outside and handed out Ubuntu CD's?

    --
    Funny may not give karma, but +5 Informative never made anyone snort coffee out their nose.
    1. Re:2 Things: by AHuxley · · Score: 5, Funny

      Dont forget MS cake will open both your ports as it runs on your system.

      --
      Domestic spying is now "Benign Information Gathering"
  3. The Microsoft birthday song by $RANDOMLUSER · · Score: 5, Funny

    Happy birthday to you!
    Happy birthday to you!
    Happy birthday dear
    PAGE_FAULT_IN_NONPAGED_AREA
    Technical information: *** STOP: 0x00000050 (0x8872A990, 0x00000001, 0x804F35D7, 0x00000000)
    *** ati3diag.dll - Address ED80AC55 base at ED88F000, Date Stamp 3dcb24d0

    --
    No folly is more costly than the folly of intolerant idealism. - Winston Churchill
  4. They should have called it... by PrimaryConsult · · Score: 5, Funny

    the Task Bar.

  5. Re:Microsoft has retail stores? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    There will be a progress indicator at the checkout, but it will vary wildly between 10 seconds and 10^23 years remaining. You'll also be accosted by store security at least 10 times on the way out to verify that your receipt is genuine.

  6. Re:Microsoft has retail stores? by KingMotley · · Score: 5, Funny

    Better than the linux store, where you have to build the whole store yourself. If you don't like the pot holes in the parking area, they say you can fix them yourself.

  7. Better than some other stores... by Aokisensei · · Score: 5, Funny

    GNU Store party - You need to bring an equal amount of cake and party favors for everyone (but triple portions for RMS, who comes and sings the Free Software Song for you and a collection of Spanish-language folk songs). Gifts can only be exchanged if you agree to re-gift on the same terms by which you received the gift yourself.

    Gentoo Linux Store party - You arrive at the site where the store should be, and get handed a box of tools and building materials. You miss your party and spend the next year building the store by hand with your party guests, only to find out you don't have compatible windows, doors, or toilets. The store staff assures you these are under development and should be buildable by your next birthday party.

    OpenBSD Store party - You drive to the store, and security doesn't let you in.

    Ubuntu Linux Store party - You arrive and are welcomed by lavishly decorated and friendly African tribesmen. The staff of the Debian store across the street glares the entire time, disgustedly.

    ReactOS Store party - It looks similar to the Microsoft Store party, but comes with all the "perks" of the GNU Store party.