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Lawyer Demands Jury Stops Googling
coomaria noted an unsurprising story about how courts are having problems with jurors Googling during cases. As anyone who has ever been called for jury duty knows, you aren't allowed to get outside information about the case you are hearing, but apparently the iPhone makes it far too easy to ignore this advice. A lawyer is trying to get jurors to sign a form explicitly stating they won't "use 'personal electronic and media devices' to research or communicate about the case." Of course, I'm not exactly sure why a juror should need to sign something for your iPhone but not a newspaper.
It's a Microsoft case, right?
Dewey, you fool! Your decimal system has played right into my hands!
...then hearing the lawyers would be deafened, rendering justice blind.
Axing 4 pooper speeling is allot.
I'm surprised twitter hasn't come up as an issue before this...
"just ruld guilty 4 life LOL pmita prison!"
"This verdict is written on a cocktail napkin. And it still says 'guilty'... And 'guilty' is spelled wrong!"
"I'm not wearing a tie at all."
Damn SMS and IM is killing all languages all over the planet.
Damned SMS and IM are killing all languages all over the planet.
#DeleteChrome
If they don't stop this behavior, Police who testify will have to use something more convincing than a quote from Wikipedia to put someone behind bars.
I don't know, I'm still waiting on a police officer to testify and use the Chewbacca Defense.
Posts not to be taken literally. Almost everything is sarcasm.
lol wut? u mus b old an wut u thnk is irrlvnt to modrn ppl
"...the iPhone makes it far too easy..."
Need a mistrial? There's an app for that.
Those who believe the Internet is private,
find their privates are on the Internet.
How could it possibly be bad for the case for jurors to look up the defender's facebook account, find out they're a douchebag, and then find them guilty? Hell, they might have the stolen jewelry on while posing for a facebook pic. Case solved! lol. But seriously, if there's some copyright troll suing another company and the jury (well okay, juries don't go copyright trials but let's pretend they do) Googles the plaintiff and find out they're a patent troll that's abused laws and caused havoc with other companies, guess what, CASE LOST! Too bad they aren't jury trials! The judge better hop on google!
Google's Super Secret Search Algorithm: SELECT @search_results FROM internet WHERE @search_results = 'good'
No, apparently only The iPhone is capable of mobile Internet magic with the Google mothership. Before The iPhone there was no way to ruin a fair trial with outside information, because it was too difficult to reach any sort of outside information at all, of any type on any medium. Also, the magical aura of The iPhone is so blinding that the jurors are too distracted to hear explicit legal instructions from the judge.
Or perhaps they're smarter than we think. Next time I want to get out of jury duty I'll just stare at my phone until I'm dismissed.
proper spelling is a sign of a writer's respect for the reader off his work.
+1 Ironic...
proper spelling is a sign of a writer's respect for the reader of his work.
FIFY
Bullshit. American are not stupid. No more then any other country.
So which one was your point again?
That Americans are not stupid? Or that Americans are stupid, just like every other country?
[...] with no recourse but to prostate himself/herself before the high-priests [...]
I can't help but wonder exactly what prostate as a verb means. It sounds deeply unpleasant.
Not being a spelling nazi, but that one is too fun to pass up. ;)
I hear a three-digit IQ is, in fact, a disqualifying condition.
Ewe muss bee knew hear. Wee owl ewes spill chuckers. Hour spilling is all wise prefect.
Free Martian Whores!
Actually, based on my uninformed, mysanthropic and cynical view of the current generation, I figure it might have been more like:
Lawyer: "Mr Burns, can you tell us in your own words what... Err... Your honour, the jury is playing with their phones again instead of paying attention!"
Judge: "Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I remind you that you're supposed to pay attention? Someone's freedom is at stake here."
Jurror 1: "Sorry. I was paying attention."
Lawyer: "Your honour, please ask her what we were talking about."
Prosecution: "Objection!"
Judge: "Overruled. Mrs Smith, can you tell us what the last question to the witness was?"
Jurror 1: "I can has cheezburger? LOL!"
Witness: "Did she actually pronounce 'LOL'?"
Judge: "Silence, please. Ok, I see. Next member of the jury? Can you tell us what was being debated?"
Jurror 2: "Chewbacca defense?"
Lawyer: "What? Your honour, I must..."
Judge: "Silence, please! Next member of the jurry? You, please?"
Jurror 3: "Huh? What?"
Judge: "What are you using that phone for, anyway? I must remind you that you're not allowed to look up any other information about the case than that presented in this court."
Jurror 3: "Ah, nah, my girlfriend was sexting me her breasts. Sorry."
Jurror 2: "Me too."
Jurror 3: "I hope you mean your girlfriend."
Jurror 2: "Nah, yours."
Jurror 3: "Well, your mom was sexting me hers."
Jurror 2: "Dude, mom is dead..."
Jurror 4: "Geesh, guys, cut it out. I was cybering this hot chick and just wrote "your mom" by mistake. Crap."
Jurror 5 blushes and quickly folds his phone and shoves it in the pocket.
Jurror 4: "Crap, now she logged out."
A polar bear is a cartesian bear after a coordinate transform.