A Geek Funeral

We've recently talked about a geek wedding, and now reader Sam_In_The_Hills writes in with news of his brother's geek funeral. "I've not seen this topic covered here before even though it's one that will concern us all at some time: what to do with our corporeal remains after we've left for that great data bank in the sky. For my recently departed brother (long illness, don't smoke!), I thought this nice SPARCstation would be a cool place to spend eternity. Yes, he's really in there (after cremation). I kept the floppy drive cover but for space reasons removed the floppy drive, hard drive, and most of the power supply. I left behind the motherboard and power switch and plugs to keep all openings covered. The case worked quite well at his memorial party. His friends and family were able to leave their final good-byes on post-notes. Anyone who wanted to keep their words private could just slip their note into the case through the floppy slot. All notes will be sealed in plastic and placed within the case. There has been one complication. His daughters like the look of it so much they aren't now sure if they want to bury him. One more thing: the words on the plaque really do capture one of the last things he ever said. Of course as kids we watched the show in its first run."

Comments

Geek funeral?

[Hojima]

Everybody knows that geeks want to be frozen until the day that they can be made into cyborgs

Re:Geek funeral?

[pwizard2]

What about the ice crystals destroying all your cell walls?

Plants have cell walls. (it's what allows them to stand up) Animals, including homo sapiens, have cell membranes only.

Other Geek options

[RKThoadan]

There are several more traditional geek options. You can donate your brain to the Harvard Brain Tissue Resource Center and get their cool "I'm going to Harvard!" card. Plastination is a pretty interesting option as well. There's also the more generic "donate to science" option, which usually means you get to help train the next doctors going through Gross Anatomy. I have to recommend the book "Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers" for more information. It's really a hilarious read and very educational.

Re:Not far off...

[Cheerio Boy]

My father actually has it written that he wants bagpipe music and Admiral Kirk's speech about Spock from Wrath Of Khan at his funeral. If we can find a casket that looks like a photon torpedo, so much the better. I think I should clarify with him whether he wants someone to recite Kirk's speech, or have that video played.

What you want is this company's cocoon model coffin: http://www.uono.de/english/home.html

Re:Not far off...

[TrekkieTechie]

If we can find a casket that looks like a photon torpedo, so much the better.

I believe you're looking for Eternal Image's Star Trek Casket, inspired by the scene you describe.

Re:Do we need the anti-smoking jab

[10Ghz]

No study has ever found a statistically significant risk of cancer due to 2nd hand smoke exposure.

http://www.lungusa.org/site/pp.asp?c=dvLUK9O0E&b=35422

"The current Surgeon Generalâ(TM)s Report concluded that scientific evidence indicates that there is no risk-free level of exposure to secondhand smoke. Short exposures to secondhand smoke can cause blood platelets to become stickier, damage the lining of blood vessels, decrease coronary flow velocity reserves, and reduce heart rate variability, potentially increasing the risk of heart attack."

"Secondhand smoke has been classified by the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) as a known cause of cancer in humans (Group A carcinogen)."

"Secondhand smoke exposure causes disease and premature death in children and adults who do not smoke. Secondhand smoke contains hundreds of chemicals known to be toxic or carcinogenic, including formaldehyde, benzene, vinyl chloride, arsenic ammonia and hydrogen cyanide."

"Research indicates that private research conducted by cigarette company Philip Morris in the 1980s showed that secondhand smoke was highly toxic, yet the company suppressed the finding during the next two decades."

And so forth. This isn't rocket-science people!

And even if we assume that there is no risk when exposed to second hand smoke, what rights do smokers have to expose others to smoke that smells like shit, makes clothes smell like shit, makes other cough and generally feel bad etc. etc.? By that logic I should have the right to carry exposed septic-tanks in subway. Sure, it might smell bad, but there's no harm, right? Therefore others have no right to tell me what to do.

Hope you don't die from cancer then.

[Anonymous Coward]

I want nothing left of my corpse.

My father died from cancer just this past weekend. He was once a strong, robust and healthy man, over 6 feet tall, 175 lbs and all of it was muscle. I held his right arm as he took his last breath. There wasn't much left of his body, only a skin covered skeleton, and even his bone marrow was filled with tumors at the end.
Cancer is a horrible way to go, and now after watching my father die I think it's probably even worse than burning to death. When you die like my father did, none of your body parts are useful. Not even the bones, because opportunistic infections are all over the body and the bones might present an infection hazard to your biology or medical classroom students.

While spending the final two weeks with him in the Hospice, I learned something that I did not know about Hospice... after the patient dies, they strip his room to the bare floor and drywalls and completely refurbish it for the next patient. I asked them if they were just simply remodeling and they said no, they have to do it this way now as a means of standard infection control protocol after each patient dies. It must be incredibly expensive. If you ever think about donating to your local Hospice, stop thinking and just do it. Ours operates mostly from donations and volunteers.

Re:Do we need the anti-smoking jab

[Hatta]

"The current Surgeon Generalâ(TM)s Report concluded that scientific evidence indicates that there is no risk-free level of exposure to secondhand smoke. Short exposures to secondhand smoke can cause blood platelets to become stickier, damage the lining of blood vessels, decrease coronary flow velocity reserves, and reduce heart rate variability, potentially increasing the risk of heart attack."

None of which has anything to do with cancer.

"Secondhand smoke has been classified by the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) as a known cause of cancer in humans (Group A carcinogen)."

Which is largely a political action, not a scientific one. The study which the EPA cited to support this ruling has been roundly debunked.

1998 Federal Judge William Osteen, who had a history of siding with the government on tobacco issues - vacated the study. He declared it null and void after extensively commentating on the shoddy way it was conducted. His decision was 92 pages long. Here is an excerpt:

"In this case, EPA publicly committed to a conclusion before research had begun; excluded industry by violating the Act's procedural requirements; adjusted established procedure and scientific norms to validate the Agency's public conclusion, and aggressively utilized the Act's authority to disseminate findings to establish a de facto regulatory scheme intended to restrict Plaintiffs, products and to influence public opinion. In conducting the ETS Risk Assessment, disregarded information and made findings on selective information; did not disseminate significant epidemiologic information; deviated from its Risk Assessment Guidelines; failed to disclose important findings and reasoning; and left significant questions without answers. EPA's conduct left substantial holes in the administrative record. While so doing, produced limited evidence, then claimed the weight of the Agency's research evidence demonstrated ETS causes cancer. Gathering all relevant information, researching, and disseminating findings were subordinate to EPA's demonstrating ETS a Group A carcinogen."

Secondhand smoke exposure causes disease and premature death in children and adults who do not smoke

Where's the study that shows it increases cancer risk? I'm not denying that it's harmful. It's clear that it does cause disease. It's just not clear that it causes cancer.

Secondhand smoke contains hundreds of chemicals known to be toxic or carcinogenic, including formaldehyde, benzene, vinyl chloride, arsenic ammonia and hydrogen cyanide."

Everything contains carcinogens. Including that burger you grilled. Showing that something contains carcinogens is not the same as showing that it causes cancer.

And so forth. This isn't rocket-science people!

No, it's health science which is significantly more complicated than rocket science. That's why it's important to make accurate claims. Argue that 2nd hand smoke is harmful, but do so with real data.

By that logic I should have the right to carry exposed septic-tanks in subway.

I wouldn't argue that anyone should be trapped in an enclosed space with a smoker. But if you choose to go someplace where the owner has allowed smoking, you really shouldn't complain. Smoking bans in public places are a good idea. Smoking bans in private establishments are not.

Infecting the drywalls

[Anonymous Coward]

There's no need to strip a room down like that... the cancer isn't going to "infect" the drywall. ;-)

It's not the cancer they're worried about. It's the opportunistic infectious diseases many dying cancer patients bring with them into the Hospice facility, such as MRSA, TB, Hep B & C and even the common diarrhea-causing viruses like Norovirus and Rotavirus.

If you're really a hospice admin like you said, you'd already know these things and have an accelerated CID program in place at your facility, unless you've been living the past 2 years with your head buried in the sand.