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Inside the Windows 7 Launch Party Pack
Barence writes to tell us that it seems Microsoft has been grinding away in the corporate world for so long, they have forgotten what "fun" means. PC Pro managed to get their hands on one of the "party packs," and it seems woefully inadequate. Nowhere did we see a pin-the-chair on the Ballmer game, giveaways that you might actually use, or even a few balloons or streamers. Instead, the only reason to get a party pack seems to be the free copy of Windows Ultimate Signature edition, which doesn't do much for your party guests (unless you burn them all copies I guess, but we would never condone that). All-in-all, it seems that Microsoft should have gone to the nearest dorm room and asked for some pointers on how to have a good party.
This pretty much sums up the image of "nerds party pack" or nerds throwing a fun party.
Sad, but insightful.
What will I be able to throw at the Mac/Linux users who show up?
Releasing easily-hackable, infectable code is shameful. Not knowing how to party is unforgivable!
Rubber tubing, gas, saw, gloves, cuffs, razor wire, hatchet, gladys and my mitts.
waking up hung over, going over to your computer, pushing the mouse to wake the monitor and realizing you got so drunk at the party you attended last night that you installed Windows on your own computer.
Monstar L
The Windows 7 Launch Party, it's like the birthday party for the loved one you adore who has a terminal illness and is unlikely to see another year.
"Most people, I think, don't even know what a rootkit is, so why should they care about it?"
The video of Balmer getting out of breath was worth it.
Balmer, you really need to get some exercise!
It looks for real and you can get a free version of Windows 7 Ultimate if you host a party!
It's NOT me! It's the meds! I'm on 1000mg of Fukitol.
Be a sport and raffle it off as a door prize or auction it off, and give proceeds, less your real costs for providing food and drinks, to a charity. Does the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation accept donations?
Knowledge is how to play a game, intelligence is how to win, wisdom is knowing what game to play.
They should have at least thrown in a couple grams of blow.
Yeah, that was my second thought, after trying to figure out how to fit hookers in a shrink-wrapped package with an indefinite shelf life. Though I guess they could be inflatable hookers, "bring your own blow".
Nostalgia's not what it used to be.
You're frightening me.
"Most people, I think, don't even know what a rootkit is, so why should they care about it?"
The threw in a box of suck. That should be enough.
Fleur de Sel
Please see Windows ME and Vista for reference.
'The tyrant will always find pretext for his tyranny.' - Aesop's Fables
You have balloons, streamers, a deck of cards, and a puzzle. It's like they want you to throw a lame children's birthday party. I really have to wonder how this got through without anyone noticing how terrible it is.
At least Ballmer isn't going door to door dressed as a clown. Although that might not be entirely a bad idea at this point...
Microsoft is trying to deflate the "John Hodgeman as PC" meme. So, since everyone knows that it's not appropriate to pick on little girls, "Windows 7" is personified by the (almost) seven your old girl in the ads. Apple looks like a big ,meanie. Why not give her a little birthday party, with cake, and games, and clowns, and.... OMG PONIES!!!
Honestly, following this marketing effort from MSFT is a bit like watching Nascar. I couldn't care less about the drivers or the cars but damn....there are some fine wipeouts to see.
/. work in corp environments and as much as we detest marketing-droids, at the end of the day, we realize their usefulness on some level.
It boggles the mind how something like this got out of the door. Seriously. Many of us here on
I don't see that anywhere in this effort. It is so laughably bad, that I almost can't believe it's real. Puzzles? Cards? A party for an operating system? WTF is going on here? Is this serious? Or am I being punk'd? Where's Ashton?
Yeah, since Windows 7 has so many different editions, the should also have a Windows 7 Debauched Launch Party Edition. All you need is lots of booze. And I mean 64 bit proof booze. Gallons of it. When your guests get tanked enough they won't give a shit about food or . . .
You have balloons,
Blow up some condoms.
streamers,
Put a bunch of razor blades in your printer, and print out a bunch of shit.
a deck of cards,
A stack of CD-ROMS and a marker. Make your own.
and a puzzle.
The desire and ability to do a puzzle can be quashed with more booze. Followed by some flaming shots, more booze.
It's like they want you to throw a lame children's birthday party.
If children are present at the Debauched Launch Party, you are going to be doing time.
I really have to wonder how this got through without anyone noticing how terrible it is.
At the Debauched Launch Party, most people won't even remember being there.
And the goodies you're supposed to give to guests? Two of them are cards for antivirus software. I guess that's being responsible, but pointing out ways to fix your software's faults is still a funny way to market a new product.
At the Debauched Launch Party, you give your guests STDs
Schroedinger's Brexit: The UK is both in and out of the EU at the same time!
I received my package yesterday and it had everything mentioned in the article plus balloons, streamers, and a few more goodies. Sounds like their package wasn't complete.
The way we're going to do it is I'll install a temp copy of 7 on my laptop, show a few things I know, and then let my guests play with it. We're also hosting a BBQ, playing some GH, RB, Wii Sports, and just plain chilling out.
I'm still undecided on whether to raffle off the single goodies (e.g. playing cards) or do some kind of trivia game: what kind of car was BG driving when he got hauled for the infamous mugshot?
After everyone's gone home I'll simply put my production hard drive back in the laptop and start using with my copy of Windows 7 Ultimate. :)
All in all, it should be a good time just getting together and hanging out.
The best thing in the pack (other than the free Windows) I received was a package of 10 reusable grocery bags. My wife was honestly more excited about getting those than she was about the Win7 Ultimate.
Wait? No Condoms?
Perhaps balloons and streamers will come in the first Party Service Pack.
Stop. Aren't there enough people with clown phobias already?
and some hookers.
Love many, trust a few, do harm to none.
I thought the party pack itself was a box of suck.
Anything can be found funny, from a certain point of view.
The Windows 7 CD certainly weighs a couple of grams and is guaranteed to blow. I don't see what your gripe is...