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NASA Attempts To Assuage 2012 Fears
eldavojohn writes "The apocalyptic film 2012 has dominated the box office, taking in $65 million on opening weekend. But with all those uninformed eyeballs watching the film, NASA has found itself answering so many common questions that their Ask an Astrobiologist blog offers calming, professional reassurance that there is no planet Nibiru, nor will it collide with Earth (although I do recall a massive solar storm forecast). NASA's main site even offers a FAQ answering similar questions. NPR has more on NASA scientist David Morrison and his efforts to calm the ensuing public hysteria, but survivalists are already planning for the big one. Pretty funny, right? Not according to Morrison: 'I've had three from young people saying they were contemplating committing suicide. I've had two from women contemplating killing their children and themselves. I had one last week from a person who said, "I'm so scared, my only friend is my little dog. When should I put it to sleep so it won't suffer?" And I don't know how to answer those questions.'"
NASA reports that giant alien spaceships have not in fact destroyed the White House and Empire State Building.
Reports of time-traveling robots looking for John Connor are unsubstantiated at this time.
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum sonatur.
Those poor people on Gilligan's Island...
Does the Cylon attack come before or after 2012?
Yeah, so if you run into one of these idiots, and she happens to be cute, just tell her that you are a Mao Shan master and you know the perfect ceremony to stop Nibiru from hitting the Earth, if you could just get a little help from her...
- None can love freedom heartily, but good men; the rest love not freedom, but license. -- John Milton
Perhaps they'll issue a mass Darwin Award.
Yes.
I won't see the movie immediately, but I'll pre-emptively say that the beeps were entirely unnecessary, inappropriate, or plain impossible, and no programmer worth their salt would make an interface that noisy. But I'm sure you were just following orders. You know who else was just following orders?
Seriously, I'm going to see it just for the beeps now, cos I'm intrigued how an informed person would accomplish this task as opposed to the mindless goons who think they know how computers work.
Okay, let's round up all the people that believe 2012 is in any way related to actual scientific fact, and let them go see The Invention of Lying. If they don't get the coincidence, explain to them it already is 2012 according to the Gregorian calendar...
Sanity is like a condom: rather have it and not need it, than need it and not have it.
You'll love it. Even the progress bars beep!
Don't blame me, I voted for Baltar.
No NASA should respond with "Yes it's real and we need $1 trillion in funding to determine how to stop it" and then spend that on real research.
That's awesome. And then in 2013 when the public goes "Hey, you took that $1 trillion and built a space station and a moon base and a bunch of rockets and solar power stations and telescopes and rovers and stuff, when you were supposed to be preventing the end of the world!"
And NASA can say "What do you think all that stuff was for? It worked, didn't it?"
LOL. Make it so.
The enemies of Democracy are
> "Ignorant" is not the same as "stupid",
No, I'm pretty sure believing what you see in a movie is stupid.
Honestly, these people see 'Transformers', 'Superman', 'Batman', 'Star Trek', 'Dogma', 'Godzilla', and '2012'. Then they choose to believe the world is ending but they won't be saved by Superman or Batman. They won't be killed first by giant robots or a giant lizard. And angels and demons... well ok they probably do believe in Dogma.
Actually these people probably already have a mental problem and fear the world is ending BEFORE seeing 2012. Seeing the movie just gives them an excuse to bring it out.
Why else would they choose this one as the real one?
Personally, I choose to believe in 'The Last Starfighter'. I am practicing, Centauri, I'm practicing...
- For the complete works of Shakespeare: cat
O RLY?
(not even a little bit work safe)
Touch everywhere, even when inappropriate.
Bubba from Folsom would like to lodge a disagreement with the second half of your statement...now try asking where he's going to lodge it.
Well, while everyone waits for the world to end on December 21, it will actually end on December 20, and no one will have expected that. :-)
The Tao of math: The numbers you can count are not the real numbers.
don't feel good just because you're more sane than the bottom 0.001% who are off their meds.
Look, I gotta take it where I can get it, alright?
The enemies of Democracy are
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Yeah, that's just what the superstitious need: Zombie Carl to explain the not-coming apocalypse!
I feel fantastic, and I'm still alive.