NYT's "Games To Avoid" an Ironic, Perfect Gamer Wish List

MojoKid writes "From October to December, the advertising departments of a thousand companies exhort children to beg, cajole, and guilt-trip their parents for all manner of inappropriate digital entertainment. As supposedly informed gatekeepers, we sadly earthbound Santas are reduced to scouring the back pages of gaming review sites and magazines, trying to evaluate whether the tot at home is ready for Big Bird's Egg Hunt or Bayonetta. Luckily, The New York Times is here to help. In a recent article provokingly titled 'Ten Games to Cross off Your Child's Gift List,' the NYT names its list of big bads — the video games so foul, so gruesome, so perverse that we'd recommend you buy them immediately — for yourself. Alternatively, if you need gift ideas for the surly, pale teenager in your home whose body contains more plastic then your average d20, this is the newspaper clipping to stuff in your pocket. In other words, if you need a list like this to understand what games to not stuff little Johnny's stocking with this holiday season, you've got larger issues you should concern yourself with. We'd suggest picking up an auto-shotty and taking a few rounds against the horde — it's a wonderful stress relief and you're probably going to need it."

Comments

list

[sopssa]

And the list:

Assassin’s Creed II
Borderlands
Brutal Legend
Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2
Dead Space: Extraction
Dragon Age: Origins
Grand Theft Auto IV: The Ballad of Gay Tony
Demon’s Souls
Left 4 Dead 2
Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars

Looks like a list of all the fun games of this year.

But oh, the fun just starts. Check out the alternatives list:

Alternative: Mirror's Edge
Alternative: Infamous
Alternative: Ghostbusters: The Video Game
Alternative: Battlefield: Bad Company
Alternative: Deadly Creatures
Alternative: Braid
Alternative: Batman: Arkham Asylum
Alternative: Uncharted 2: Among Thieves
Alternative: Overlord II
Alternative: C.O.P.: The Recruit

Many of the games on the alternatives list have exactly the same kind of violence. Hell, in Overlord you're taking control of a evil god like character that controls his minions to destroy and kill enemies, the good people.

I bet many of us played games that had gore as teens. They should had have sex too - it's even a natural thing, while violence is not (or shouldn't be). The problem isn't the gore and it wont turn a teenager in to a mindless massacer - if it is, then he has other problems that the parents should be taking care of.

Re:list

[Grr]

Many of the games on the alternatives list have exactly the same kind of violence.

If by 'the same kind of violence' you mean 'a different kind of violence'.
The NY times article refers to the ESRB rating. I'm pretty sure the article with the alternatives went by those. In your example the alternative, Overlord II, is rated Teen while its counterpart, Left 4 Dead 2, is rated Mature.
There are standards for these ratings. Now you may disagree with the standards, but dismemberment, animated blood and gore fall in the M category. Morality choices, like playing on the side of evil in Overlord, are not totally excluded from the standard, but usually have less impact.

Re:list

[darthvader100]

Tetris is a comunist look at destroying the building blocks of modern society. This is why the straight piece which clears all those lines is RED.

Don't let the simple graphics fool you.

It could also be a FPS in which you play a block trying to kill other blocks and keep respawning as new blocks every few minutes :R - the tongue in cheek smilie

Re:list

[MickyTheIdiot]

but all those moralists that are actually sick minded pervs can see the fitting of tetris pieces together to be a vaguely sexual act!

With all those pieces fitting perfectly together it's probably the most sexual game ever! Oh baby!

Re:list

[ConceptJunkie]

Funny, all my kids' games have parental control? Don't everyone's?

Here we go again....

[El Lobo]

Another list, product of the neomoral of today...

Interesting, with all the graphic violence in Modern Warfare 2, it's funny that the only objectionable aspect of it is that the player can opt to go "undercover as an enemy terrorist."

Not a particularly helpful summary

[RogueyWon]

Actually, the article is far less irritating than the summary had led me to believe. Yes, it points out 10 games that are not recommended for children and teens. But it isn't trying to get the games banned (the original commonsensemedia article actually points out that these are good games), just trying to help parents make informed decisions. This, I believe, is a good thing.

Moreover, the "suggested replacement" games aren't all of the "Barbie Horse Adventures" ilk. While a few made me raise an eyebrow, most of them are reasonable enough replacements.

Let's take a look at the list:

Assassin's Creed 2 replaced by Mirror's Edge: I haven't played AC2, but I would probably agree that the original AC is "not for kids". Mirror's Edge doesn't seem outlandish as a replacement; it's not some twee kiddy game and it does contain violence. It's just a bit less "in your face" with it. So no problems with this one.

Borderlands for Infamous: Ok, this one made me go "hmm". Borderlands has highly cartoonish violence, while Infamous is actually quite dark in its theme and has highly morally ambiguous characters. Weirdly, I think the game they've recommended is actually less suitable than the game they're replacing.

Brutal Legend for Ghostbusters: I'd have no problem with this, particularly as Ghostbusters is actually the better game provided you avoid the dismal PC version.

Call of Duty MW2 for Battlefield Bad Company 2: Fair enough. I believe a lot of PC gamers already made this switch due to the dedicated servers issue anyway. Both are respectable but unspectacular games, once you get past the hype.

Dead Space: Extraction for Deadly Creatures: I've not played Deadly Creatures, but I have played Extraction (which puts me in a small minority, judging by its dismal sales figures). While it's a "light gun" game, Extraction is absolutely and emphatically not for kids. It is dark, scary and gory.

Dragon Age: Origins for Braid: This one's deeply weird. Dragon Age isn't exactly your average hack-em-up arcade game. I suspect that any under-18s asking for Dragon Age and patient enough to stick with it past the first 10 minutes are probably mature enough to deal with it. And Braid as a replacement? A platform/puzzler as a replacement for an RPG? No, I don't think so. If I were to suggest a replacement, it would probably be Last Remnant, Lost Odyssey and Blue Dragon, which are at least RPGs. Or get them into the whole retro thing with a copy of Baldur's Gate 2 - the themes are still as mature, but it's harmless if it's just little sprites, right? :)

GTA IV for Batman: Arkham Asylum: Again, the games aren't quite the same genre, so this is a tricky one. However, GTA is not for kids, end of story. The Batman game is awesome, and probably dark enough in its theme and style to satisfy most teenagers. So yes, you could do worse than this.

Demon's Souls for Uncharted 2: Yeah, no real problems with this. To be honest, I prefer Uncharted 2 as a game anyway (though this may put me in a minority).

Left 4 Dead 2 for Overlord 2: Another strange one. Overlord 2 is not an fps. Nor is it a particularly co-operative game. Nor is it fantastically good. Nor is it morally squeaky-clean (though the violence is cartoonish). I guess you could always try to track down the Australian version of L4D2.

GTA: Chinatown for C.O.P.: well, at least it's one sandbox game for another. The problem is that the reviews all seem to show that C.O.P. is basically rubbish. It's probably your best option while staying within the same genre on the same platform, but you can still expect a lot of disappointment on Christmas morning with this switch.

So yeah, at least some of the switches recommended are sensible, and this isn't a dreadful guide to parents who might not be massively savvy in these matters. On this basis, did the article summary really need to take the tone that it did?

Re:Not a particularly helpful summary

[RogueyWon]

Yes, I've played it. It was basically the original game with a stupid plot. It's certainly not bad; the engine feels slick, the weapons are nicely modelled and the graphics and sound are pretty good (though the former still fall short of the standard set by Crysis more than 2 years ago).

But it's absolutely nothing special. The set-pieces are less impressive than the original's (there's certainly no counterpart to the infamous nuke sequence), the plot goes off the deep end into the kind of lunacy that even Metal Gear Solid probably wouldn't stoop to (which is a real atmosphere killer) and the singleplayer campain is devastatingly short.

It's a 7.5/10 sort of game. Maybe an 8/10 if you want to be kind. That's solid, but it's not spectacular.

Read the ESRB Rating

[c0mpliant]

Seriously, anyone who needs to read this review shouldn't have the responsibility of children. A quick look at the ESRB rating of each of the above games will tell you that little Johnny who is 8 shouldn't be playing Dragon Age, GTA or assassins Creed!!

Re:Read the ESRB Rating

[slim]

The whole point of the article is "You know from the ESRB ratings that these games aren't for kids. So for each one, what's a good substitute?"

Re:Read the ESRB Rating

[spyrochaete]

ESRB is a private organization which was formed so that the games industry could self-regulate. Its intent is to keep the government out of the ratings process. ESRB ratings are a suggested watermark for entry with a summary of potentially objectionable material. It's a tool to allow parents to shield their children from specific content. Nothing is forced upon anyone.

If there is any censorship going on it's from stores like Walmart that refuse to carry games based on that rating. You can still buy those products elsewhere.

Not really sure what your objection is here.

Very misleading summary

[xIcemanx]

First, it's not the NYT. It's a blog of the NYT. Big difference.

Second, the NYT blog simply asks readers to discuss a list compiled by Common Sense Media of ten games not to buy your children.

So to ascribe the list to the New York Times itself is incredibly misleading.

Re:Gee, how were they supposed to know?

[slim]

Yeah, you'd have thought everyone would be able to read the little label next to the ESRB 17+ mark, suggesting a Teen rated alternative to the game you're looking at.

Errr, sorry what? You say there isn't such a label?

Oh, maybe this article has some merit then.

A useful list

[davide marney]

You're a parent, an uncle, a grandfather. You don't play video games. You want to give something the kid will like. You hear he's "into" video games. You step into the local gamer store, and ...

YOU HAVE NO CLUE

The one thing you want to avoid is buying that game with "blood spurting out of victims' bodies, human carcasses littering the floor, blood-stained walls and floors, and copious screams of torture" (Dead Space: Extraction). Otherwise, your sister Jenny will have your head on a platter ... for real.

Katamari Damacy is still good

[Lord Bitman]

If you don't have it, get it now. Child-friendly, and great for adults too.

Re:Katamari Damacy is still good

[witherstaff]

Yeah, it teaches kids that getting drunk, wasted, and trashing the universe is alright.

Not the NYT's List

[Colonel Korn]

If you RTFA, you'll see that this is a list from Common Sense Media being reported by the NYT, not the NYT editorializing. In fact, the very first item on the list, Assassin's Creed 2, just got an almost ridiculously glowing review (that even sort of recommended it for high school students because it might enthuse them about Renaissance Italy) from the Times this week. The Times' "conclusion" is to ask you what you think about this list and recommend discussing it below.

Re:Learning about the world takes time.

[jbezorg]

When living in a fantasy world, you learn nothing about the real world.

That's why the "Troll" mod was invented.

Let the porn flow through you...

[DJRumpy]

I never understood the puritan view we have in American in regards to Sex and Violence. I actually agree that we should minimize exposure to violence for children. I have to wonder if we're a bit backward. It seems like Europe has a much better view on things. Minimize exposure to violence for young children, but don't be so paranoid about sexual content. Violent crime has always been out of control in the US as compared to similarly developed countries overseas. We allow our children to watch all sorts of violent movies, play violent games, yet we shelter them from any exposure to sexuality like it was some sort of dirty secret.

(note, the difference is rape rates between the US and Europe is even more pronounced, with the US showing about 7 times the rate of European nations).

What's wrong with this picture?

Homicides for every 100,000 persons:

Ireland [0.9]
Germany [0.9]
Norway [1.0]
United Kingdom [1.4]
France [1.6]
Canada [1.9]
Scotland [1.59]
United States [5.6]
Russia [20.15]
Venezuela [31.61]
Jamaica [32.41]
Colombia [61.78]

Re:Let the porn flow through you...

[stewbacca]

While I laud your post as one of the clearest voices in this thread, I'd just raise one question. If we are to presume rape cases in the US are higher because we have suppressed sexuality in our media, then shouldn't violent crime be higher in Europe because they suppress violence in their media?

In any case, I don't think either are caused by media, only that our respective media are mirrors of our society, not the cause of our societal ills.

From the mouths of babes

[iceperson]

The reason I don't think it's appropriate to expose children to sexual material at a young age has to do with them not being mature enough to understand the full consequences of sex. It's easy enough to tell a child not to kill your brother or one of the other kids in class, but they simply aren't mentally prepared to understand the nuances of sex and when it's appropriate. When given a choice between telling a child sex is bad, don't do it, or avoiding the discussion until they are more prepared to understand I'll chose the latter.

Note: Nudity and sex are not the same thing. I don't agree with the puritanical position that nudity is bad and kids should be protected from it.

Re:From the mouths of babes

[MBGMorden]

The reality is kids aren't stupid, and even pre-puberty they are interested in such things. Just because you choose to ignore the issue doesn't mean that THEY will.

As an example, despite growing in a strict Baptist household (my mother still cringes if a tit flashes on screen and my youngest sibling is now 22) who refused to mention a thing about sex (I never even had "the talk" - ever), I still was curious about it because that's human nature.

I wasn't 5-6 years old before I was playing "I'll show you mine if you'll show me yours." with the girl that lived next door to me (she was roughly the same age - 2 months younger than me). After being given some dirty magazines by some kids at school and learning by word of mouth from peers what sex was, the same girl next door and I decided to "try it out" one day when our parents weren't home. I think we were around 12 at time - maybe even 11.

Neither of our parents ever found out about it, and I can't say that I feel particularly traumatized (the girl and I were best friends at the time - she moved away a few years later - I've talked to her once or twice after we were grown up and she seemed fine, though we've never brought up the sex issue). Still, looking back, it was a foolish thing that I may have known better than to do if I'd actually been taught about the issue other than by my equally clueless classmates.

Ignoring the issue simply won't make it go away. Instead you throw it to random chance and let kids figure things out on their own rather than having some guidance. In some things that's not so bad (finding one's path is a good thing), but with the prevalence of STD's, teen pregnancy, and a myriad of other issues, kids typically just don't make wise decisions on their own when it comes to sex.

Re:Learning about the world takes time.

[brkello]

Actually, I haven't really noticed that. I have noticed that most people these days play video games. And if they don't they escape in to fantasy worlds through books or other outlets. Stop being so judgmental.