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If ET Calls, Who Speaks For Humanity?

EagleHasLanded writes "Who speaks for humankind if ET calls on us? Paul Davies, chairman of the SETI Post-Detection Taskgroup, is a likely ambassador. But Allen Tough founded the Invitation to ETI Web site, which encourages ET to make contact via email (and also strongly discourages humans from impersonating ET). But an individual in the UK got over some of the hurdles designed to weed out hoaxers, before finally throwing in the towel."

31 of 371 comments (clear)

  1. Re:I do. by sopssa · · Score: 3, Funny

    Wouldn't this be a good slashdot poll? Maybe we should put kdawson in charge.

  2. Re:I do. by swuppet · · Score: 3, Funny

    I suggest we let ELIZA do the talking.

  3. Just say yes by LoverOfJoy · · Score: 5, Funny

    Just remember, when someone asks you if you're a god, you say, "YES!"

  4. Clearly by Dachannien · · Score: 2, Funny

    Jodie Foster!

  5. obviously by oliverthered · · Score: 3, Funny

    if et calls we should great them with the communication of the other animals on the planet (well some of them),first. Before grating them ourselfs.

    this would show them that we can appreciate the communication of other life forms, and even put that communication before the communication of ourselfs.

    If we are to communicate we need to demonstrate empathy, since the only thing we know about them is that they can communicate, empathy via appreciation of the communication of other life forms on our own planet may demonstrate we can empathize with them.

    This should reduce fear and hostility towards us, and aid in good relations. in respect they may attempt to empathise with us a little more.

    --
    thank God the internet isn't a human right.
  6. This is a nonsense by Roark+Meets+Dent · · Score: 5, Funny

    Aliens are already here and do not recognize SETI or any human government or group organization. They deal with and judge each human being on their individual merits and faults. For more information, see http://www.alliesofhumanity.org/

  7. Do not accept High Beyond protocol packets by grayshirtninja · · Score: 2, Funny

    I've read my sci-fi and I know how dangerous alien email can be.

  8. Bruce Campbell by j.+andrew+rogers · · Score: 2, Funny

    Bruce Campbell. No matter what happens, he's seen it all before.

  9. Re:I do. by gtall · · Score: 4, Funny

    Nah, I think it should be a muppet, keep'em guessing is my advice. The drummer Animal might do well, or Kermit if we'd like to appear reasonable.

  10. Re:ET Will Pick.. by melikamp · · Score: 5, Funny

    Oh no no no. OBVIOUSLY, if aliens show up tomorrow, after having flown countless light years and having built a highly advanced macro-society the size of a galaxy, it is OBVIOUSLY humans who will be calling the shots. They may have bombs million times more powerful than a supernova and they may be able to derive their energy from teleporting, but surely we will be able to outsmart them, with all that we learned from Arnold movies and sitcoms.

  11. Anybody but the British! by psykocrime · · Score: 4, Funny

    Please hope the Brits don't make first contact with ET, their track record isn't so hot when it comes to handling these things...

    --
    // TODO: Insert Cool Sig
  12. The answer is... Steve Jobs by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    And if the aliens look like they're going to attack, his buddy Woz can hack the spaceship.

  13. Rick Astley by largesnike · · Score: 2, Funny

    ...though they might declare war on us...

    --
    "Laugh while you can a-monkey boy!" - Dr Emilio Lizardo
  14. Obligatory Gary Larson by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny
  15. Re:I do. by grcumb · · Score: 4, Funny

    I do. Next question, please.

    Geez Louise! Dozens of answers already and not a single one of you has suggested Kent Brockman. What is wrong with you people?!?

    Well, I for one do not welcome such a cataclysmic failure in geek cred. Our insect overlords can't get here soon enough, if you ask me.

    --
    Crumb's Corollary: Never bring a knife to a bun fight.
  16. Re:I do. by PopeRatzo · · Score: 5, Funny

    Clearly, Sarah Palin should do the talking for us. This way, the ET's won't bother us, thinking there's no intelligent life on Earth.

    --
    You are welcome on my lawn.
  17. Re:I do. by WrongSizeGlass · · Score: 2, Funny

    Meanwhile, just go about your business, but keep in mind that they are watching, and judging.

    So, what you're saying is, my mom is an alien?

  18. Re:ET Will Pick.. by PopeRatzo · · Score: 4, Funny

    Population not prone to panics or conspiracy theories, or conditioned hatred towards some other population.

    I'm sorry, I thought they were visiting Earth.

    --
    You are welcome on my lawn.
  19. Re:I do. by Sulphur · · Score: 3, Funny

    I suggest we let ELIZA do the talking.

    Why are you interested in mutilating our cows.

  20. Re:I do. by Runaway1956 · · Score: 2, Funny

    "Our insect overlords can't get here soon enough, if you ask me."

    I agree. I've heard that they taste like chicken, if you deep fry them. Mmmm-mmmm. Southern fried insect overlords - a hillbilly delight!!

    --
    "Windows is like the faint smell of piss in a subway: it's there, and there's nothing you can do about it." - Charlie Br
  21. ET Email Home? by CrashandDie · · Score: 2, Funny

    Somehow, I get the feeling that ET's first email will be something like:

    Subject: 0rder Vicodin, Hydrocodone, Paracod, Codeine, Phentermin at Cheapest Price on net. 100% NoPrescription + FDA APPR0VED, FedEx shipping and FREE BONUS pills with every order!

  22. Re:I do. by dickens · · Score: 2, Funny

    I was thinking John Boehner. Can you imagine the glee with which he's going to be made to eat his words?

  23. Re:Just in case... by Culture20 · · Score: 4, Funny

    And I totally agree that they'll know we're sentient

    "Sure, the bipeds on the third planet are merely sentient, they're not >äðûæé< . Thus, it's perfectly okay to anal-probe them; we have every right as an >äðûæé< species."

  24. It's strange no one thought of HIM! by master_p · · Score: 3, Funny

    The one and only...the G.O.A.T...The man who has banged every green chick from here to the Delta Quadrant...

    WILLIAM SHATNER!!!

    Hmmm...now i know why aliens do not dare to land...they obviously mistook ST-TOS for reality...;-)

  25. Re:No one by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Hello, my name is Odgwx343, representing my client, the esteemed (unpronounceable). Be informed that the use of oxygen respiration on a planet of mostly water has been deemed to be already patented by my client, and we would appreciate it if you of the 3rd world of this system would immediately cease and desist all further violation of our client's patent rights, else it will be necessary to pursue further action on our client's behalf, including, but not limited to, seizure of assets, and subsequent shutdown of illegal operations resulting in the patent violation. Thank you in advance for your prompt attention to this matter.

  26. Re:Its too late. by mestar · · Score: 4, Funny

    "This is ancient Earth's most foolish program! Why does Ross, the largest Friend, simply not eat the others?"

  27. Re:ET Will Pick.. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    I guess the answer to your question is: "That depends on how many tentacles they have."

  28. Re:I do. by kiore · · Score: 4, Funny

    Clearly, Sarah Palin should do the talking for us.

    After all, she can see outer space from her back porch.

  29. I vote Proctologist by 517714 · · Score: 2, Funny

    It could save a lot of anal probing.

    --
    The US government have made it clear that we have no inalienable rights; any we do not defend vigorously will be taken.
  30. Re:Davies, ORLY? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    in which case, any religion we choose to represent would likely be weird and possibly offensive to them.

    I iz in ur interplanetary negotiations, drawing cartoons and fucking shit up.

    Denmark

  31. Re:Just in case... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Beyond that... There is nothing we can really do.

    ...unless we steal one of their fighter ships and go into orbit, dock with the mothership, unleach a virus using a Mac connecting it via USB to their computer system. I would say we have a fair chance of succeeding too!