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Net Neutrality Suffers Major Setback
RingDev writes "The US Court of Appeals ruled in favor of Comcast today, stating that the FCC lacks the authority to require broadband providers to give equal treatment to all Internet traffic flowing over their networks."
Congratulations on your purchase of a brand new nigger! If handled properly, your apeman will give years of valuable, if reluctant, service.
INSTALLING YOUR NIGGER.
You should install your nigger differently according to whether you have purchased the field or house model. Field niggers work best in a serial configuration, i.e. chained together. Chain your nigger to another nigger immediately after unpacking it, and don't even think about taking that chain off, ever. Many niggers start singing as soon as you put a chain on them. This habit can usually be thrashed out of them if nipped in the bud. House niggers work best as standalone units, but should be hobbled or hamstrung to prevent attempts at escape. At this stage, your nigger can also be given a name. Most owners use the same names over and over, since niggers become confused by too much data. Rufus, Rastus, Remus, Toby, Carslisle, Carlton, Hey-You!-Yes-you!, Yeller, Blackstar, and Sambo are all effective names for your new buck nigger. If your nigger is a ho, it should be called Latrelle, L'Tanya, or Jemima. Some owners call their nigger hoes Latrine for a joke. Pearl, Blossom, and Ivory are also righteous names for nigger hoes. These names go straight over your nigger's head, by the way.
CONFIGURING YOUR NIGGER
Owing to a design error, your nigger comes equipped with a tongue and vocal chords. Most niggers can master only a few basic human phrases with this apparatus - "muh dick" being the most popular. However, others make barking, yelping, yapping noises and appear to be in some pain, so you should probably call a vet and have him remove your nigger's tongue. Once de-tongued your nigger will be a lot happier - at least, you won't hear it complaining anywhere near as much. Niggers have nothing interesting to say, anyway. Many owners also castrate their niggers for health reasons (yours, mine, and that of women, not the nigger's). This is strongly recommended, and frankly, it's a mystery why this is not done on the boat
HOUSING YOUR NIGGER.
Your nigger can be accommodated in cages with stout iron bars. Make sure, however, that the bars are wide enough to push pieces of nigger food through. The rule of thumb is, four niggers per square yard of cage. So a fifteen foot by thirty foot nigger cage can accommodate two hundred niggers. You can site a nigger cage anywhere, even on soft ground. Don't worry about your nigger fashioning makeshift shovels out of odd pieces of wood and digging an escape tunnel under the bars of the cage. Niggers never invented the shovel before and they're not about to now. In any case, your nigger is certainly too lazy to attempt escape. As long as the free food holds out, your nigger is living better than it did in Africa, so it will stay put. Buck niggers and hoe niggers can be safely accommodated in the same cage, as bucks never attempt sex with black hoes.
FEEDING YOUR NIGGER.
Your Nigger likes fried chicken, corn bread, and watermelon. You should therefore give it none of these things because its lazy ass almost certainly doesn't deserve it. Instead, feed it on porridge with salt, and creek water. Your nigger will supplement its diet with whatever it finds in the fields, other niggers, etc. Experienced nigger owners sometimes push watermelon slices through the bars of the nigger cage at the end of the day as a treat, but only if all niggers have worked well and nothing has been stolen that day. Mike of the Old Ranch Plantation reports that this last one is a killer, since all niggers steal something almost every single day of their lives. He reports he doesn't have to spend much on free watermelon for his niggers as a result. You should never allow your nigger meal breaks while at work, since if it stops work for more than ten minutes it will need to be retrained. You would be surprised how long it takes to teach a nigger to pick cotton. You really would. Coffee beans? Don't ask. You have no idea.
MAKING YOUR NIGGER WORK.
Niggers are very, very averse to work of any kind. The nigger's most
We're so screwed. All politicians are so technologically ignorant they can't tell when a lobbyist is lying to them, and even if they could tell many wouldn't care.
I am moving the hell out of this country ASAP. Day after day its just worse news. US is going to have some massive brain drain soon, I predict.
*brought to you by Starbucks
wow, are you really this ignorant?
Jesus Christ, this copypasta has been floating around /. for nearly a year now... are you really such an infrequent reader as to think that GP was a legitimate post?
Here's some fresher copypasta for ya: Jews for Nerds!
Jews, also known as kikes, hebes, hymies, yids, gold niggers, oven magnets, hook noses, sheenies, swindlers, criminals, "firewood", and Arabs in denial are a subhuman species of reptilian extra-terrestrials and adherents to one of the world's oldest major religions, called "Judaism", otherwise known as "The Worship of Money" or "Eating Arab Babies".
Judaism was the world's first master race theory. The Jew religion teaches that Jews are the Chosen People of God and that there is a sacred mystical quality to Jew DNA. In olden times, Jew prophets would, under the command of YHWH, frequently lead the Jews on genocidal rampages against neighboring populations, and even today Jew leaders often cite Jewish religious ideals to justify their ongoing genocide of sandniggers. Judaism ironically found its mirror-image inversion in the anti-Jew Aryan racialism of the Nazis.
Despite only being 0.22% of the world's population, Jews control 99% of the world's money. Not only do the Jews control the world, but also the media, the banks, the space program, and LiveJournal's porn communities and Gay communities. All Jews possess the following features: an extremely large nose, fake boobs, curly hair that reeks of faggotry, one of those gay hats, a love of coke, a law practice, a roll of money, a small cock, or shitty taste in dental hygiene.
Jews invented both Communism and Capitalism. Karl Marx, of course, was a Jew, which was why he understood money so well, and in fact he was converted to Communism by another Jew, Moses Hess, the actual founder of Zionism, who ghost-wrote Marx's The German Ideology. Capitalism was created when Christian Europeans threw away their morals and decided to embrace Jewish practices like usury (see: John Calvin). Jews were the first group to create a sophisticated banking system, which they used to fund the Crusades in order to pit Christians and Muslims (both adhering to religions derived from and controlled by Jews) against each other to kill as many people as possible in a macabre human sacrifice to YHWH.
The Jew banking system was based on fraud and lies, so when it inevitably collapsed, the Jews just pwned as many people as possible by unleashing the Black Plague on them. Later, Jews economically controlled medieval Venice (the first modern maritime trade empire), and then crypto-Jewish merchants economically controlled the Spanish Empire, including the slave trade. Openly Jewish bankers orchestrated the Dutch Empire and founded Jew Amsterdam (later Jew York). Later the Dutch Jews moved to London because they thought it would be a better base for a global empire, and actually brought a Dutch nobleman, William III, with them, who they installed in a coup d'état (more like Jew d'état, amirite?) as new King of the British Empire. For hundreds of years, Jewish bankers controlled global trade through their bases in Jew York City and London. European colonialism was, through its history, essentially a plot whereby Jews could gain control of gold and diamond mines in poor countries and increase their stranglehold over the global economy.
Jews also enjoy slicing up baby penises for fun, some even enjoy sucking them. See below.
Jews also created Jew search engine Google, so now they can find all Jew information on Internets.
Some suggest that we should use Jews instead of dogs to sniff out large amounts of concealed cash or anything else worth smuggling at airports due to their sensitive Jew noses. Obviously, this is a horrible idea, because the pay is bad, and the dirty Kikes would probably form a union and demand moar money, thus increasing the burden on taxpayers everywhere.
>>>For the purpose of regulating interstate and foreign commerce
Because most Comcast companies are organized to handle INTRAstate communications. They lay their wires to serve a town or county, but don't cross the state line except at the highest level. Therefore they are can choose which websites they will, or will not carry, to the local homes.
Therefore I'd suggest you try lobbying your State government, and have them regulate Comcast, in the same fashion that they regulate the electrical and natural gas monopolies.
"I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it." - historian Evelyn Beatrice Hall
Because most Comcast companies are organized to handle INTRAstate communications. They lay their wires to serve a town or county, but don't cross the state line except at the highest level.
Bullshit. They have fiber crisscrossing state lines all over the country.
>>>Notice the word Communications. So it seems like they might have some authority here.
Yes the FCC has authority over commerce/communications AMONG the States. Not inside. Not over a local ISP that operates inside a town or county and does not cross the border. (Try reading the Supreme Law sometime.)
"I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it." - historian Evelyn Beatrice Hall
Once the internet is completely metered and locked down, with corporate traffic given huge priority over private traffic, I wonder if all the "free market solves everything" libertarian types will still be so anti-regulation....
The libertarian philosophy is illogical at it's heart. Taking government out of everything in our lives is not government, it's Anarchy. Once the government gets involved in anything, it's no longer libertarian. It could be conservative, but it's not libertarian. And if you think the government should only be providing national defense and nothing else, then what about police and courts? Again, no rule of law, just Anarchy within the borders.
My father is the president of his home town council. Every libertarian he's every had to deal with wants the government to stay off their land and out of their life... until their neighbor does something to piss them off, then they march in demanding action from the government. It's just not logical.
Considering the philosophy is not logical, and many of them are, IMHO, downright crazy, I seriously anything short of a holocaust will change their minds. Even some conservative Republicans continue to say the economic downturn was because we weren't conservative enough in our regulation laws, and they and libertarians will cling to statements like that until the end of days.
"All great wisdom is contained in .signature files"
>>>>>Because most Comcast companies are organized to handle INTRAstate communications. They lay their wires to serve a town or county, but don't cross the state line except at the highest level. Therefore they are can choose which websites they will, or will not carry, to the local homes.
>>
>>Bullshit. They have fiber crisscrossing state lines all over the country.
Somebody doesn't know how to read. Read the bolded part again. And read the sentence after that. The U.S. government has jurisdiction over the fibers crossing state lines. The U.S. government does *not* have jurisdiction over the local cables lying under your street. If Comcast wants to block rushlimbaugh.com from crossing over their local-area-network (buried coaxial cables), the U.S. government has no authority to force them to do so.
That power has been reserved to the State government.
"I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it." - historian Evelyn Beatrice Hall
Trust me: you want the government OUT of your internet.
Let's look at the SSN; we were told it'd never be needed outside of that program. That changed.
Let's consider seat belts. Thanks to 'Unsafe at any Speed' the government had a toe-hold on the auto industry and regulated it nearly to death.
Let's think about the military; while they risk their lives, pencil-necked geeks go to the UN and write RIDICULOUS LAWS like the one that snipers must be fought from the ground, they can't climb up the tower and shoot them in the back.
Everything the government touches turns to crap.
No? Amtrack. Social Security, Welfare, Medicare, everything's bankrupt and we're borrowing more. SHOW ME ONE SUCESSFUL GOVERNMENT PROGRAM.
If the FCC gets control over the ISPs it won't stop there. Soon it'll be government control over content. "Not enough FTP is being used; you must now buy BigCo-brand FTP software to do your web browsing" and other brain-dead, not-even-veiled attempts to corner the market to make a political friend a billionaire. Again.
If you don't like Comcast's network trickery, you can cut off the account! When enough people do this, they'll be out of business.
PLEASE DON'T LET THE BLIND, STUPID STORMTROOPER IN.
Mark my words: this is one disaster that can wait.
--- For a good time mail uce@ftc.gov
Constitution be dammed. I want my internets and I want them faster and cheaper! I want it NOW! I want someone else to pay for it and I want it to do everything for me. Oh. Wait. That was healthcare. Nevermind.
Why is it so hard to only have politicians for a few years, then have them go away?
capitalism is teh evil!!!!
Resorting to that tired meme is +5 insightful? Oh ok. Good to know.
Reality also doesn't resonate well with Mother Jones reading, Michael Moore fanclub presidents, tin-foil based, libtards such as yourself
>>>the FCC does have the authority to regulate inside states.
Really? Please quote to me the relevant portion of the U.S. Constitution which gave them that power. All I can find is this: "The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people."
That's pretty damn clear. The FCC has *no* authority inside states. Neither does any other part of the national government.
"I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it." - historian Evelyn Beatrice Hall
>>>Constitution be dammed. I want my internets!
That means we will have a lawless society, and a government with no practical limit upon its power. AKA a tyranny. True it will be an elected tyranny, but still a monopoly with the power to squash the citizens underfoot like ants (see Roman Republic or Athenian Democracy).
"I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it." - historian Evelyn Beatrice Hall
How many times does that have to be said?
I'm not sure how excessive repetition will make your falsehoods true. You could probably assume you've tried enough, it'll never actually work.
Do you know the difference between necessity and convenience? Do you think wanting something really really badly turns it into a need?
Good, my choice is to vote against all regulation like your suggesting. And quite obviously, others feel the same way.
We don't need your nanny state. I can make my own choices.
If you can't, please get your own baby sitter and don't appoint one for everyone.
Anonymous comments are as pathetic as the anonymous "sources" that contaminate gutless journalism from the New York Time
I do know the difference between needs and wants. I understand the idea between surviving and living in relative luxury. I also support the idea that the FCC should regulate the Internet.
I simply hate the sloppy thinking of the entitled legions who "need" everything and "need" it provided to them.