Oil Leak Could Be Stopped With a Nuke

An anonymous reader writes "The oil leak in the Gulf of Mexico could be stopped with an underground nuclear blast, a Russian newspaper reports. Komsomoloskaya Pravda, the best-selling Russian daily, reports that in Soviet times such leaks were plugged with controlled nuclear blasts underground. The idea is simple, KP writes: 'The underground explosion moves the rock, presses on it, and, in essence, squeezes the well's channel.' It's so simple, in fact, that the Soviet Union used this method five times to deal with petrocalamities, and it only didn't work once."

Comments

What could possibly go wrong?

[mysidia]

Nuke opens up a giant hole into the oil field.

Leak becomes 100000 times worse.

Fallout from the nuke (extreme heat) raises the oil temperature to the boiling point.

Oil rapidly reaches the surface and immediately ignites, setting the surface of the world's oceans on fire.

Since the hole is so big now, and the rate of leakage so massive, the world's oceans are quickly covered with the flaming oil, like a propane torch.

And you thought global warming was an issue with CO2.......

This would be like lighting a propane tank

Snopes Anyone?

[coaxial]

"US Orders Blackout Over North Korean Torpedoing Of Gulf Of Mexico Oil Rig" By Sorcha Faal

To the reason for North Korea attacking the Deepwater Horizon, these reports say, was to present US President Obama with an “impossible dilemma” prior to the opening of the United Nations Review Conference of the Parties to the Treat on the Non-Proliferation of Nuclear Weapons (NPT) set to begin May 3rd in New York.

This “impossible dilemma” facing Obama is indeed real as the decision he is faced with is either to allow the continuation of this massive oil leak catastrophe to continue for months, or immediately stop it by the only known and proven means possible, the detonation of a thermonuclear device.

Russian Navy atomic experts in these reports state that should Obama choose the “nuclear option” the most viable weapon at his disposal is the United States B83 (Mk-83) strategic thermonuclear bomb having a variable yield (Low Kiloton Range to 1,200 Kilotons) which with its 12 foot length and 18 inch diameter, and weighing just over 2,400 pounds, is readily able to be deployed and detonated by a remote controlled mini-sub.

Should Obama choose the “nuclear option” it appears that he would be supported by the International Court of Justice who on July 8, 1996 issued an advisory opinion on the use of nuclear weapons stating that they could not conclude definitively on these weapons use in “extreme circumstances” or “self defense”.

On the other hand, if Obama chooses the “nuclear option” it would leave the UN’s nuclear conference in shambles with every Nation in the World having oil rigs off their coasts demanding an equal right to atomic weapons to protect their environment from catastrophes too, including Iran.

To whatever decision Obama makes it remains a fact that with each passing hour this environmental catastrophe grows worse. And even though Obama has ordered military SWAT teams to protect other oil rigs in the Gulf of Mexico from any further attack, and further ordered that all drilling in the Gulf of Mexico be immediately stopped, this massive oil spill has already reached the shores of America and with high waves and more bad weather forecast the likelihood of it being stopped from destroying thousands of miles of US coastland and wildlife appears unstoppable.

Someone should get her on Fox News with Michael Brown, Dana Perino, and Rush Limbaugh.

Re:From the same guys...

[ObsessiveMathsFreak]

What are you talking about? The Russians won at Stalingrad.

Re:BP is not trying to seal the well

[BodhiCat]

doh

Re:From the same guys...

[serbanp]

So true! That reminds me of the old joke about why the Italian infantry wore khaki pants..

Re:Dare I say it?

[alta]

Wow, that was very interesting. Racist bunch of folks living there now... 100% white. How dare they.