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The Truth About the Polygraph, According To the NSA

An anonymous reader writes "The NSA (the secretive intelligence agency that brought you wholesale warrantless wiretapping) has produced a public relations video about its polygraph screening program titled 'The Truth About the Polygraph.' But is the NSA telling the truth? AntiPolygraph.org provides a critique (video)."

16 of 452 comments (clear)

  1. If I ever had to take one.. by headkase · · Score: 4, Funny

    If I ever had to take a polygraph test I would do so under one condition: I get to add one question to the test at the beginning. The question would be: "Can this machine tell if I am lying?"

    --
    Shh.
    1. Re:If I ever had to take one.. by Kitkoan · · Score: 2, Funny

      subjecting the person under assessment to unfamiliar, semi-stressful conditions while asking probing questions..

      So its like being abducted by aliens but with less anal probing and more question probing...

      --
      Attention... all grammer nazi"s! Is they're anything; wrong with: my post,
    2. Re:If I ever had to take one.. by Foobar+of+Borg · · Score: 2, Funny

      So its like being abducted by aliens but with less anal probing and more question probing...

      You've obviously never been in the custody of the NSA before.

      Besides, they got all their interrogation and research tactics from the Grays, anyway. I know this since the voices in my head has telled me so.

  2. Re:Complete Bullshit by kjart · · Score: 4, Funny

    I posted about that earlier in response to this when it had no comments, but my comment has gone walkies..

    Based on the test results, you're lying.

  3. Re:Polygraph by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    RCMP?

    Royal Canadian Muppet Police?

  4. Re:Complete Bullshit by nih · · Score: 1, Funny

    yea me t

    --
    I'm a rabbit startled by the headlights of life :(
  5. Re:Complete Bullshit by DiegoBravo · · Score: 3, Funny

    Non ACID-compliant databases are the current norm. So, be quiet!

  6. We are supposed to believe by bagboy · · Score: 2, Funny

    The "Anti-Polygraph" folks are telling the truth about the Polygraph truth? Can we get them to take a poly?

  7. Re:Complete Bullshit by Foobar+of+Borg · · Score: 5, Funny

    Well, as they say: "you don't beat the polygraph - you beat the polygraph examiner.

    But, in Soviet Russia, polygraph examiner beats YOU!

  8. Re:Polygraph by tsm_sf · · Score: 4, Funny

    Thanks, now I have the hallelujah chorus stuck in my head.

    --
    Literalism isn't a form of humor, it's you being irritating.
  9. Re:Polygraph by Drishmung · · Score: 5, Funny

    Yesterday, upon the stair
    I saw a man who wasn't there.
    He wasn't there again today.
    I think he's from the NSA.

    --
    Protoplasm. Quiet Protoplasm. I like quiet protoplasm.
  10. Re:Polygraph by mogness · · Score: 2, Funny

    ...though police do use it during their investigations.

    They also use it on Maury to find out if your baby daddy is cheating on you.

    --
    that's teh shizzle bizzle
  11. Re:Polygraph by ClosedSource · · Score: 3, Funny

    I've heard that story too, but the fact is that the photocopier lie detector has as much scientific evidence to support it as a Polygraph does.

  12. Re:a placebo to make you believe your lies are see by noidentity · · Score: 2, Funny

    So [a polygraphi] is just like a Scientology body thetan test machine?

    Yeah, but without the volcanoes. Big difference.

  13. Re:a placebo to make you believe your lies are see by hey! · · Score: 2, Funny

    Reminds me of the early days of Scientology. I was attending MIT, and there used to be recruiters who'd harass you when you went through Central Square, asking, "Do you want to take a free personality test?"

    A friend of mine came up with the perfect response. He'd say, "Did you pass?" Without exception, the recruiters would respond (with a straight face), "Oh, no, it's not *that* kind of a test."

    It was freaky, like they'd lost their capacity to recognize irony along with their body thetans.

    --
    Post may contain irony: discontinue use if experiencing mood swings, nausea or elevated blood pressure.
  14. Re:I think I saw one of the video participants by Alpha830RulZ · · Score: 2, Funny

    Oh, please, for the love of god, mod parent up!

    --
    I was taught to respect my elders. The trouble is, it's getting harder and harder to find some.