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Dog Eats Man's Toe and Saves His Life
Have you ever been so drunk that you passed out and your dog ate your toe? I haven't either, but luckily for Michigander Jerry Douthett, he has. It turns out Jerry has type 2 diabetes and a wound on his toe had becoming dangerously infected. After a night of drinking Jerry passed out in his chair and the family dog Kiko decided to do a little doggy doctoring. From the article: "'The toe was gone,' said Douthett. 'He ate it. I mean, he must have eaten it, because we couldn't find it anywhere else in the house. I look down, there's blood all over, and my toe is gone.' [Douthett's wife] Rosee, 40, rushed her husband to the hospital where she's a gerontology nurse — Spectrum Health's Blodgett Campus. Kiko had gnawed to a point below the nail-line. When tests revealed an infection to the bone, doctors amputated what was left of the toe."
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Diabetic and drinking like a fish. Smooth move, retard.
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Trolling is a art,
An acquaintance of mine once fell into bed dead drunk, and his pet rabbit chewed the ends of his fingers (it's nae ordinary bunny!). Next day he checked into rehab, which probably saved him from drinking himself to death.
OK, not quite the same, but what do you expect from a rabbit, an intervention?
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I can just see that conversation...
Husband: "Holy cow, where's my toe? What happened?!"
Wife: "I finally lopped off that death-threat."
Husband: "What? That... that don't even make SENSE!"
Wife: "Yep, I've just been waiting for you to pass out drunk so I could take care of it. Smell was gettin' too bad."
Husband: "But... that ain't even possible! You can't just cut off my toe! Why are you lying?"
Wife: "*sigh* Okay, you're right, you're right. It was the dog. The dog actually bit it off and ate it. It completely ignored the rancid smell of rotting flesh, and ate your toe."
Husband: "Oh! Well that makes sense, that dog always was loyal! Good boy! Have some more Jack Daniels, boy!"
...he didn't have the clap.
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That's what the cat said.
House pet, M.D.
yeah, it's a good thing those 2 human idiots have such an intelligent dog as their owner...
Shit is another matter entirely. ;)
Check out my world simulator thingy.
They should name the dog HMO.
If libertarians are so opposed to effective government, why don't they all move to Somalia?
Yet, I stand by my belief that it's better to be pissed off than pissed on.
Here on Urine Talk today we have frequent caller Gorzek...
I drank what? -- Socrates
The 'fresh urine' part is the kicker. Who keeps stale urine? It's gotten so cheap these days.
Just a bit past the point where you blow chunks.
Luck has nothing to do with it. They bought the dog to do their income taxes.
I understand they've got special breeds for that now, like the wire-haired deduction hound and the tax haven terrier.
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Yes, it's very unique in that regard.
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(if uncertain, please mentally append a wink to that sentence.)