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Russian Scholar Warns Of US Climate Change Weapon
According to Russian political scientist, and conspiracy aficionado Andrei Areshev the high heat, and poor crop yields of Russia, and other Central Asian countries may be the result of a climate weapon created by the US military. From the article: "... Areshev voiced suspicions about the High-Frequency Active Aural Research Program (HAARP), funded by the US Defense Department and the University of Alaska. HAARP, which has long been the target of conspiracy theorists, analyzes the ionosphere and seeks to develop technologies to improve radio communications, surveillance, and missile detection. Areshev writes, however, that its true aim is to create new weapons of mass destruction 'in order to destabilize environmental and agricultural systems in local countries.'"
But we'll stop if you pay us ONE MILLION DOLLARS!
I still cannot find the droids I am looking for...
It's called "SUV".
Table-ized A.I.
We already made the unfounded claim that all natural disasters and climate related problems on the Earth are due to women dressing immodestly.
What? You also have a giant immersion heater in the Yukon river?
You American bastards!
OK I'll take the bullet and get the meme out of the way so we can focus on serious-business /. discussion.
"In Soviet Russia, Climate changes you!"
Why don't they just stuff the civilians into some bunkers and Iron Curtain them, until the weather clears?
Emotions! In your brain!
Not only worthy of slashdot, but filed under Science as well.
Couldn't possibly happen, because the Russians have prior art on this: https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/Russian_Woodpecker
The conspiracy-theories for the Russian Woodpecker were primarily mind control and weather modification.
But then again, if they didn't patent it, maybe we could use it after all.
Sarcasm alert - I know that citing patents and prior art against secret government weapons is silly. Sometimes the secret government weapons are, too.
The living have better things to do than to continue hating the dead.
yes yes it is....
you see the Russians have been trying for years to stop our agents...
See! See my russian friends! Your failure to make big trouble for Moose and Squirrel has allowed US to create the best doomsday machine ever.
Rocky P Squirrel is our BEST climate change scientist.. and His Moose friend is a failed Magician in disguise... He really is the money behind the brains....
YOUR FAILURES HAVE DOOMED US ALL!
Do not look at laser with remaining good eye.
You don't get it, man. Like, government "leaks" are just distractions to shift attention away from their true goals. But the true genius is how they make everybody believe they're incompetent! Don't you see?!? If everybody thinks the government is incompetent, then nobody's going to believe they're capable of pulling off such a HUGE conspiracy, and anyone who tries to tell the truth, like me, is labeled as a raving lunatic!
https://www.eff.org/https-everywhere
You want us to elect Sarah Palin as anything more important than the mayor of Wasilla?
Be afraid. Be very afraid.
Faster! Faster! Faster would be better!
That's a weird spelling of SUV.
Worst. Yakov Smirnoff joke. Ever.
Planning to be moderated ± 1: Bad Pun.
Conspiracy theorists have been haarping on about the thing for years, even blaming it for effects that occurred years before it's construction was completed!
Yes, yes, yes... that's all very nice, but how good is it at making popcorn more efficiently?
~Syberz
No Mr Bond, I expect you to fry
Ceci n'est pas un sig.
This can be defeated by the: Guided Universal Indepednant Not Near Earth Survival System, or GUINNESS.
I'm a good cook. I'm a fantastic eater. - Steven Brust
"Senator Dole, why should people vote for you instead of President Clinton?"
"It makes no difference which one of us you vote for. Either way, your planet is doomed. DOOMED!"
That's exactly what the conspiracy would WANT you to say...