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Ballmer Says 90% of Chinese Users Pirate Software
jbrodkin writes "Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer used the official state visit of Chinese President Hu Jintao as an opportunity to complain that 90% of Microsoft software users in China didn't pay for the products. The comments were part of a discussion with Barack Obama and the Chinese president about intellectual property protection. According to a White House transcript, Obama said in a press conference that 'we were just in a meeting with business leaders, and Steve Ballmer of Microsoft pointed out that their estimate is that only 1 customer in every 10 of their products is actually paying for it in China.' Obama didn't detail any specific measures the US and China would take to help Microsoft and other vendors fighting software piracy. 'The Chinese government has, to its credit, taken steps to better enforce intellectual property,' Obama said. 'We've got further agreement as a consequence of this state visit. And I think President Hu would acknowledge that more needs to be done.' Microsoft did not say how it calculated the statistic that 90% of Chinese users aren't paying for Microsoft software."
Ballmer: Goddam it Hu, (Throws chair) 90% of the Chinese people are pirating software.
Hu: Yes, and you see where the problem is, they are using Windows to do it.
Look where all this talking got us, baby.
George Bush: "Condoleeza! Nice to see you. What's happening?"
Condoleeza Rice: "Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China."
George: "Great. Lay it on me."
Condoleeza: "'Hu' is the new leader of China."
George: "That's what I want to know."
Condoleeza: "That's what I'm telling you."
George: "That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?"
Condoleeza: "Yes."
George: "I mean the fellow's name."
Condoleeza: "Hu."
George: "The guy in China."
Condoleeza: "Hu."
George: "The new leader of China."
Condoleeza: "Hu."
George: "The Chinaman!"
Condoleeza: "Hu is leading China."
George: "Now whaddya' asking me for?"
Condoleeza: "I'm telling you Hu is leading China."
George: "Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China?"
Condoleeza: "That's the man's name."
George: "That's whose name?"
Condoleeza: "Yes."
George: "Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China?"
Condoleeza: "Yes, sir."
George: "Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East."
Condoleeza: "That's correct."
George: "Then who is in China?"
Condoleeza: "Yes, sir."
George: "Yassir is in China?"
Condoleeza: "No, sir."
George: "Then who is?"
Condoleeza: "Yes, sir."
George: "Yassir?"
Condoleeza: "No, sir."
George: "Look, Condoleeza. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone."
Condoleeza: "Kofi?"
George: "No, thanks."
Condoleeza: "You want Kofi?"
George: "No."
Condoleeza: "You don't want Kofi."
George: "No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the U.N."
Condoleeza: "Yes, sir."
George: "Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N."
Condoleeza: "Kofi?"
George: "Milk! Will you please make the call?"
Condoleeza: "And call who?"
George: "Who is the guy at the U.N?"
Condoleeza: "Hu is the guy in China."
George: "Will you stay out of China?!"
Condoleeza: "Yes, sir."
George: "And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N."
Condoleeza: "Kofi."
George: "All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone."
Thus spake the master programmer:
"When the program is being tested, it is too late to make design changes." (Tao)
US-China trade deals are like a wife swap except the US is the only one that brought their wife.
In other news, the Windows Phone 7 user is really mad. We tried to call him but he was out of credit.
Dear Mr Gates,
We like to using your software but it does not go well in Chinese. Instead we have make our own called Red Flag Linux, you can look here:
http://www.redflag-linux.com/en/
We let anyone use this, for free, we do not need payment.
Hu Jintao
Leader of Largest Country In World
Dear Mr. Ballmer
We openly admit that it is common practice in this country not to pay MicroSoft's predatory pricing if another avenue presents itself. However, we'd like to assure you that we're getting tired of the damned bluescreens, the most annoying of which occurred at the Beijing Olympics, right in front of God and everybody, if we believed in God, and we have decided to return all of our bootleg copies and what few legitimate copies we could scrape together. The crates should be arriving soon. We will be switching to Linux. We wish your company good fortune and hope you sell many more copies of Windows to the US military.
Regards,
China
Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer used the official state visit of Chinese President Hu Jintao as an opportunity to complain that 90% of Microsoft software users in China didn't pay for the products.
/. community?
So, about the same ratio as the
Don't take it personally, but I'm not going to read your pithy response to my post.
but I still wouldn't the OS after that.
Not even accidentally?
It's also worth mentioning that most of the pirated software found in China is sold laced with malware.
What a coincidence, most of the Windows installs sold legitimately in the USA have that problem as well.