Disarm Internet Trolls, Gently

Shlomi Fish writes "The best way to react to people trolling on Internet forums is not to feed them, right? Wrong! 'Don't feed the trolls' is also usually ineffective. Luckily, however, there is more effective approach, inspired by the book Feeling Good by David D. Burns."

Comments

Pfft

[Anonymous Coward]

Sounds pretty gay.

Re:Pfft

[Kell Bengal]

What exactly do you mean by "gay"? We accept you here, no matter your orientation. I agree, sometimes the artical can sound gay. Perhaps we can meet an accord?

Re:Pfft

[Anonymous Coward]

An accord? Now that's a gay car -- and it's the kinda car Hitler would drive if he were around today.

Re:Pfft

[M8e]

Why do you feel that this approach is pretty gay?

I think it's somewhat gay. But what make you think that it's pretty gay?

Re:Pfft

[Austerity Empowers]

Its belt matches its shoes.

Re:Pfft

[countertrolling]

We accept you here, no matter your orientation...

Oh that's right! Go after the Asians!

Re:Pfft

[thr13z3]

If I may.

  I do believe that the sentiment that Pfft is trying to convey is that OP most likely is a big faggot.

Note that this is my personal interpretation.

Re:Pfft

[ciaohound]

I'm sorry, sir, but this is the "Dealing With Trolls" thread. You're looking for the "Godwin" thread, which is the next door down.

Re:Pfft

[pandrijeczko]

Sir,

I resent strongly your implication that one who is of heterosexual leanings is automatically entirely unappreciative of pulchritude in those things that are in existence around his or her personage.

Indeed, in some circles is not considered a display of virility when a man, in the company of his colleagues, is openly complementary of the magnitude and shape of a nubile young maiden's mammary glands within his near vicinity?

goatse

[Anonymous Coward]

That anus is impressively enlarged. Thank you for sharing it with us. What made you first think about posting it on slashdot?

Re:goatse

[ArsenneLupin]

That anus is impressively enlarged.

The anus is a metaphor. A metaphor for the security (or lack thereof) of the website where it ended up on. Ya know, "big enough to drive a truck through"...

Thank you for sharing it with us.

You're welcome!

What made you first think about posting it on slashdot?

I thought geeks might be interested in seeing that SQL injection still works...

Practicing

[countertrolling]

You suck!...

Kinda...

Eh, actually you're not so bad...

In fact you're kinda cute...

Wanna go out tomorrow night?...

Nervous?.. Yeah, a little

First time?... No, I've been nervous lots of times

Or on the otherside

[DarkOx]

http://www.ehow.com/how_2064125_become-internet-troll.html

The above URI has some helpful hints for noobs who might want to get into trolling

Re:Depends

[amirulbahr]

Why do you say that we should not respond and just add them to our ignore list?

Re:Depends

[moonbender]

Sounds like the OP is suggesting we respond to trolls with Eliza.

Please go on.

Re:Depends

[Noughmad]

I hear it's going to use Gnome as a text editor.

danger trolls: do not feed.

[mevets]

1. What do you mean by feeding the trolls? I'm sure you don't really want them to starve to death.

2. I agree with you that it is difficult to have to put up with trolls. I hope, however, that the inner-tubes are big enough for everyone; maybe we can work together to find a nice bridge for the trolls to live under. It may seem a bit harsh, but if we fed them a few goats now and again, maybe they will feel better about themselves and move on to greener pastures.

3. If we can keep the trolls from offending us, then cyber-area can benefit from the diversity. I saw a documentary once where even an Ogre - I know they are different from trolls, but they share some common disagreeable characteristics - befriended a donkey, and they seemed to have a genuinely witty banter and joie de vivre. I read in the newspaper that the Ogre recently even married; so there is some possibility we can live together.

yeah, I guess it kinda works.

OR JUST ATTACK THEM IN A SUBJECT LINE, YOU PUSSY!

[Subject Line Troll]

 

Oh, I disarm them alright..

[sstamps]

Then proceed to beat them to death with said arms.

I find it particularly therapeutic and cathartic.. for me, that is. The trolls don't generally survive the encounter. :)

Re:Troll = someone who disagrees with groupthink

[Dwonis]

This is especially jarring when these folks move out to a mainstream forum like Slashdot...

Very subtle. Nice work!

Know what I miss?

[hairyfeet]

You want to know what I miss? (shut up, of course you do!) I miss when /. had really good trolls. Remember them? The ones that took pride in their trolling? The ones that would spend all day cooking up offensive ASCII art or writing a shit eater or ass rape troll that like a fine novel didn't give away its true intention until nearly the end?

Man we used to have some damned fine trolling here, not the lame "Nigger nigger faggot faggot" crap spewed from Halo fratboys on 4chan and Digg, no trolls that were PROUD to be trolls and took pride in their work. Even our crazies were a cut above the rest, folks like Twitter that could spin a dozen sockpuppets into one giant conspiracy fueled fantasy around MSFT and the Illuminati. Now THAT was some damned fine trolling!

Sadly now our trolls are as cheap and badly made as a Chinese knockoff iPod, just no pride in the work anymore. Even our crazies have lost their flair,like MichaelK with his endless copies of his name with a number after it just so he can type "pathetic" and have it not at -1, or the HOSTS guy that capitalizes every other word like that makes his crazy more powerful or something, just no subtlety or finesse at all.

I'm sure the great trolls of the past are looking down from under their bridge in the sky and hanging their heads in shame. Oh and of course trying to shake their dicks at us, but unlike the lousy trolls of today they have a chorus line going with all the wieners having tassels and spinning in time like the pasties on a Vegas showgirl. Its all in the presentation you see, something the trolls of today just don't get. Personally I blame reality programming and MTV.

Re:Know what I miss?

[russotto]

You want to know what I miss? Blah blah blah yellow onion blah blah blah

I'm carefully backing off of your lawn. Please don't shoot.