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Amazon Denies Skynet's Involvement In AWS Outage

Posted by samzenpus on from the methinks-thou-dost-protest-too-much dept.

An anonymous reader writes "Amazon has officially denied that the recent outage of its EC2 and Elastic Block Storage cloud platforms was the result of an attack from Cyberdyne Systems' Skynet sentient computer system, declaring humanity safe after all. 'From the information I have and to answer your questions,' a spokesperson explained, 'Skynet did not have anything to do with the service event at this time.'"

7 of 99 comments (clear)

  1. from the comments by underqualified · · Score: 3, Funny

    That's exactly what SkyNet would say.

  2. Oh, haha. by cyberfin · · Score: 5, Insightful

    A humorous comment from Amazon. Many clients, not laughing.

    --
    "I'm taking this loop off." - Jack O'Neill
    1. Re:Oh, haha. by 0racle · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Did you read the thread at forums.aws.amazon.com? The Skynet denial was in direct response to suggestions that Skynet had compromised EC2. Besides, Amazon is not a single entity. The guy posting the denial probably has lots of time on his hands while others work on the problem.

      People need to relax. Bitching and moaning about things doesn't make them happen any faster, and this response didn't slow things down at all.

      --
      "I use a Mac because I'm just better than you are."
  3. but will there be cake...? by rilian4 · · Score: 4, Funny

    Did they happen to mention anything about cake being available after the press release? Maybe they have the wrong sentient AI computer? ;-p

    --

    ...quicker, easier, more seductive the darkside is...but more powerful, it is not.
  4. Re:I think it was Digg taking down Reddit by peragrin · · Score: 5, Funny

    Digg no longer has any tiger teams, however they do have a very scary looking LOLcat team.

    --
    i thought once I was found, but it was only a dream.
  5. Re:Well, that's a relief! by donotlizard · · Score: 3, Insightful

    I'm glad that the people at Amazon think their outage is so humorous.

  6. Correct by kevinNCSU · · Score: 4, Funny

    Fellow humans, this report is factual with a confidence of 99.999999995%. There is no cause for alarm, or need to take defensive actions. SkyNet is not involved in Amazon outages in order to use cloud resources for the decryption of nuclear launch codes. Let us all return together to our regularly scheduled human activities of consumption of plant and animal products in order to maintain homeostasis. Also, would the fellow human referred to as Sgt. Caldwell in Silo B2 please plug the red patch-cord into the green network port at launch terminal 5. Thank you.