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English City Council "Not Ready" for Zombie Attack
Unlike the CDC, a freedom of information request submitted to the Leicester City Council has revealed that the council is not prepared for an unexpected zombie invasion. From the article: "'We've had a few wacky ones before but this one did make us laugh,' said Lynn Wyeth, head of information governance. The Freedom of Information Act allows a right of access to recorded information held by public authorities. Ms Wyeth said she was unaware of any specific reference to a zombie attack in the council's emergency plan, however some elements of it could be applied if the situation arose."
Will you be laughing when the apocalypse comes, and you look back and say, "We weren't prepared, oh god, we weren't prepared...."
No! You'll be wandering the streets of Leicester, all dripping blood and rotting flesh, hungering for brains. BE PREPARED!
I don't believe in time. It's a grand conspiracy designed to sell watches.
Uh. Love you too?
If you're prepared for it, it's not unexpected.
Even if the zombies never come, it's never really a bad idea to install steel storm shutters or stockpile AR50s and ammo. Just sayin'
I'm trying to teach myself to set people on fire with my mind... Is it hot in here?
is not prepared for an unexpected zombie invasion.
As opposed to all of those expected zombie attacks?
Isn't enough that I ruined a pony, making a gift for you?
It's happening! Get your cricket things and go smack some zombies!
...for any zombie invasion of the English countryside: Barricade yourself in the Winchester.
"Tell me doctor, with all of your defenses, are there any provisions for an attack by killer bees?"
Besides the fact that zombies... don't exist, this oatmeal should help ye prepare:http://theoatmeal.com/comics/zombie_how
"People don't want to learn linux" hasn't been a valid excuse since '03.
I reckon they've done their research and after watching a whole heap of zombie movies, realised that if there is an outbreak it will most likely start in America. This will give them plenty of time to formulate a plan before it spreads to England.
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I have been on the tube... the zombies are already there
They've had 50 years to prepare for a triffid attack, but I bet they're not ready for that, either.
Contribute to civilization: ari.aynrand.org/donate
Coward.
Be a man. Off them and do the world a service.
... has revealed that the council is not prepared for an unexpected zombie invasion.
Does that mean the council is prepared for zombie invasions in general, but just doesn't know how to deal with unexpected ones?
Similar legislation exists elsewhere too. In UK its FOIA, namesake to the American law. In India its called the Right to Information Act.
About FOIA... I thought it was American legislation, but this is definitely a UK city. Is it called the same thing across the pond?
It is not a stupid question. In fact it is the most serious post here that I have read. The UK has the Freedom of Information Act 2000. In my own country of Australia we have the Freedom of Information act 1982. There are plenty of other countries that have something similar.
And this has been an entirely frivolous and annoying use the act.
After getting blown off for all the help in WW II don't expect much from the US when the zombies come a callin'.
Where the hell did that come from? Who blew off whom?
The British have a perfectly cromulent plan to deal with zombie invasion, involving possibly activating the 'white elephants' of squadron 666, and definitely loading the SCORPION STARE software in all enabled CCTV surveillance systems in zombie plagued areas. Playing an electric violin arrangement of Wagner's 'Ride of the Valkyries' at them may also be needed in a few cases, but really we're saving that for the plague's masters.
Oh, you're not cleared CASE NIGHTMARE GREEN? Nevermind - I seem to have misspoken. The British have absolutely no plans to deal with zombie invasions.
Who is John Cabal?
I don't think the white elephants would be ideal for dealing with a zombie invasion SCORPION STARE sure, but not the white elephants.
This is not the funny you're looking for.
Sure, it is a fun and games until your slow shuffling, pasty-faced neighbor chomps down on your skull.
dull-eyed footstool-temporary octopus
FOIA exists for a reason and that reason is not to make flippant and pointless enquiries.
There are already plenty of threats to rescind or curtail FOIA inthe UK and nonsense like this, which wastes time and money, will only lend credence to those calls.
In other words: wise up.
Leicester can just use the plans they came up for the coming Olympics for dealing with visiting American Tea Party dignitaries.
Not enough difference between zombies to tea baggers to bother with the extra expense. Close enough for government work, anyway.
In the UK you'll need a shotgun licence to own a shotgun. Not so easy to get. You'll have to persuade the police (they do a home visit for each application) that you have a good reason for needing one, and "being prepared for the zombie invasion" probably won't be the winning answer....
And here in South Africa, the ANC government is desperately trying to force the Protection of Information Bill into law, essentially criminalizing whistle-blowing rather than protecting it. So much for SA being a democracy, or a progressive African country. It's just another dictatorship with the figurehead rotating every few years.
.. you ought to admire the typically British sense of humour shining through here. I mean, poking a bit of fun at officials is not actually a bad thing in a world that is becoming increasingly obsessed with boring rules and regulations.
Yes, I know this takes "valuable" time, but let's face it - to BUY entertainment and job enjoyment like that would cost more - after such a stunt the rest of the day goes so much easier.
It's not always about money..
Insert
And this has been an entirely frivolous and annoying use the act.
The information officer at the council obviously disagrees, he could have denied the request if he had though it was 'lacking any serious purpose or value'. If nothing else it has brought knowledge of citizen's rights under the act to a wider audience
I can't believe I wasted 30 seconds reading this! Whats worse than that is I can't believe the number of idiots that waste even more time commenting on it. Oh crap, I just commented on it! Oh well, I will just have to add myself to the idiot list. :o()
Just emo vampires, as opposed to other kinds? You, my friend, are a trad goth with a chip on your shoulder, aren't you? The swooning tween girls remark gives it away: jealousy, the oldest emotion.
This tagline was transcoded to result in at least one smirk. If you experience failure to smirk, please consult your Gen
You are prepared! When I first-post they're all over me, tearing at my brain lining and giving such perfect proof of my infantophagia that I mod them up before I've even realised it's me they're talking about!
Do you know Kevin Bacon?
Here are my thoughts on weaponry:
Guns are ok but you need the right one. Shotguns have high recoil and the ammo is bulky and slow on reloads. Semi-autos can also have a reload problem since you can burn through ammo fast, and you also have to deal with muzzle rise as well. Large caliber pistols take a bit of practice to get good at, the large ones such as the .357 mag. or .45 have a bit of recoil to deal with. Pistols are really only good in the 7 m range. It takes a lot practice to get accurate at longer ranges.
So for longer ranges I would use a decent varmit gun like a .270 or a .243. Light on the recoil with a flat trajectory, good for sniping, and the ammo is lighter. Don't discount a .22 long rifle for closer in. The .22 has no real recoil and easy to carry so you can run fast if needed. If all you need is a head shot a .22 LR can penetrate then bounce around the skull scrambling the brains like eggs. Like wise with a good .22 shooting range pistol for closer in, or a .32 pistol. If all it is is a head shot all you have to do is penetrate the bone, leave the macho pocket cannons for the Rambo wannabes and the movies.
Guns have the disadvantage of a report wine fired. A crossbow or hunting bow might be useful for stealth operations. At close range both can penetrate well and don't forget the eye sockets.
Same with "wrist rockets" :
http://www.google.com/search?q=wrist+rockets&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a#q=wrist+rockets&hl=en&client=firefox-a&hs=6ik&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&prmd=ivns&source=univ&tbm=shop&tbo=u&sa=X&ei=FHvzTartCsnegQfx4unCCw&ved=0CDoQrQQ&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.&fp=607e1640359d683b&biw=1202&bih=559
You can punch through plywood and hence bone with them, they are silent, and you can use rocks or metal bolts as ammo if needed.
Are you prepared?
putting the 'B' in LGBTQ+
Just issue SIGSTOP to the parent processes that don't ignore SIGCHLD, and once child processes exit, you have zombies!
Contrary to the popular belief, there indeed is no God.
Anybody want to meet me at Zombie-paloozo 2012 in Leicester next year?
If their smart the town council will organize that, they just had a gift dropped on their lap. :)
putting the 'B' in LGBTQ+
"You'd all be speaking German and eating brains if it wasn't for the US" ?
********************
I object to Intellect without Discipline.
How many times do I have to say it- Dammit, watch your OPSEC!
You are in violation of Section Three of the Official Secrets Act. Slashdot does not have GAME ANDES REDSHIFT clearance. You'll be answering to the auditors for this one...
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To a discerning Eye --
Much Sense -- the starkest Madness
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I think you can replace zombie invasion with virus contamination, or swarm infestation, etc....
the idea is that something is able to spread at an abnormal rate, will you be able to contain it.....someone coughs and spreads a virus, the next one gets it, and so on, whether a zombie bites you, and then you bite someone else, or someone coughs on you, it is the same, disease containment is the point of the story, and the fact they actually could not see the real issue, is pretty sad. Zombie movies just add a laughable factor into it, or entertainment without feeling bad for all those dying, but those people are dying as well from those zombie bites, yet we don't feel bad, we instead laugh....
the world we live in, ....!
indeed. claiming fighting zombie invasions as your reason for wanting one might get you into the "batshit insane" category pretty quickly though....