Modest Proposal For Stopping Hackers: Get Them Girlfriends

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Modest Proposal For Stopping Hackers: Get Them Girlfriends

Posted by timothy on Tuesday July 17, 2012 @05:13AM from the so-basically-you're-saying-a-lobotomy dept.

kierny writes "Hackers/crackers who get arrested are typically male and young adults — if not minors. Why is that? According to research by online psychology expert Grainne Kirwan, it's because the typical hacker 'ages out' once they get a girlfriend, job, kids, and other responsibilities that make it difficult to maintain their hacking/cracking/hacktivist lifecycle. Could that finding offer a way to help keep more young hacking enthusiasts out of jail?"

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The Girlfriend(tm) by happy_place · 2012-07-17 05:15 · Score: 4, Funny

The Girlfriend(tm) could solve a lot of problems young adolescent males have... someone should patent that...

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Agreed by slazzy · 2012-07-17 05:15 · Score: 5, Funny

Probably the most effective idea yet. A girlfriend is a lot more fun than a computer, at that age anyway.

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1. Re:Agreed by sycodon · 2012-07-17 05:33 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  For a teenager, a couple of minutes is stretching it a bit.
  
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2. Re:Agreed by shutdown+-p+now · 2012-07-17 06:27 · Score: 4, Funny
  
  A girlfriend is a lot more fun than a computer, at that age anyway.
  Not really. You can only hack a girlfriend once, and even then there are some associated difficulties (as Hans Reiser has found out).
Re:Wow by NerdmastaX · 2012-07-17 05:16 · Score: 5, Funny

agreed.. if this continues i might as well go back to cnn.
Re:Same with terrorists... by SJHillman · 2012-07-17 05:23 · Score: 4, Funny

Of course they were married. Why do you think they volunteered?
Or legalize prostitution by Quiet_Desperation · 2012-07-17 05:24 · Score: 4, Funny

That's my takeaway from this.
Then again that's my takeaway from most discussions.
Re:Wow by Anonymous Coward · 2012-07-17 05:31 · Score: 5, Funny

So you went back to your mom?
Re:Wow by Reverand+Dave · 2012-07-17 05:33 · Score: 5, Funny

No, he went back to your mom.

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I got here through a series of tubes
Re:obligatory reference by Anonymous Coward · 2012-07-17 06:48 · Score: 5, Funny

Dear Sony;

You have put out almost nothing but shitty, proprietary crap for over a decade now. Your music CDs install rootkits on computers. You remove advertised features from the PS3. You sue people who have committed no crime just to shut them up. In response, you've been under relentless assault from hackers.

This will continue until you change your ways, or you get us girlfriends. Either way, we're cool.

-Anonymous
Re:obligatory reference by Evil+Pete · 2012-07-17 12:14 · Score: 4, Funny

You still trust the quality of girlfriend(s) that Sony might get for you?
You'll be hoping for a root kit but you'll just get viruses.

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