Slashdot Mirror
Ask Slashdot: Identity Theft Attempt In Progress; How To Respond?
An anonymous reader writes "It appears that two weeks ago my email address got into the wrong database. Since that time there have been continuing attempts to access my accounts and create new accounts in my name. I have received emails asking me to click the link below to confirm I want to create an account with Twitter, Facebook, Apple Games Center, Facebook mobile account, and numerous pornographic sites. I have not attempted to create accounts on any of these services. I have also received 16 notices from Apple about how to reset my Apple ID. I am guessing these notices are being automatically generated in response to too many failed login attempts. At this point I have no reason to believe any of my accounts have been compromised but I see no good response."
Um... yes... There's this person, probably in another country, that I suspect is trying to gain access to my facebook account. LOL.
I believe that Jason Bateman was in a recent documentary on this topic - seemed very factual, and you should probably consider his plan of action:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2024432/?ref_=sr_1
-jd
Okay you need to listen to me carefully and to be focused. Do you have access to a bathtub? Good, take your laptop into the bathroom and fill the bathtub full of water. I need you to log into your Facebook and open your Farmville tab. You need to do this quickly before they gain access. Take each of your animals from your farm and love them and nuzzle them and say goodbye to them. Then hold them under water in the bathtub until they stop struggling.
...
Are you done? Good, leave them in the tub, they're in a better place now.
Go back into your room and crawl under your bed so the satellites they have control of cannot see you. Open up your Apple account and start forwarding your e-mails to your Gmail account. Yes, I know it will take forever, no there is not an easier way to do this. Okay, once you have all of those out delete your Apple account -- you'll get a new one later. You never really owned that stuff you bought on iTunes so just forget about it now, it's gone. Now log into iCloud on your laptop and start the laptop on fire. It's better to destroy all of those photos, tax returns and documents then to let them have them.
Now listen carefully because this part is important. These men are going to access your accounts. They're going to send your friends messages and make you seem like a jerk -- just for fun. There's nothing you can do about that. Just make sure to leave the Slashdot chat box open when they take you
Hello?
Hello? Anonymous Reader?
I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very large amount of Slashdot karma; karma I have acquired over a very long career. Karma that make me feel like I can stand up to people like you. If you let the anonymous reader's accounts go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will ask you politely to stop messing with people.
My work here is dung.
>Is it already time to reach out to the cops?
I suspect any cop would just stare at you blankly while sipping his coffee or chewing his/her doughnut.
That or they would work out an excuse to beat you up and arrest you for resisting arrest.
Cops are not equipped to deal with these things.
I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
No, but he did change them all to "honest equine capacitor fastener"
They done goofed this time. You need to set up a backtrace. I can help you. Send me all of your log-in information and I will get the backtrace set up. Then I will forward your case on to the Cyber Police. These hackers aren't going to know what hit them.
Look where all this talking got us, baby.
to something not in the dictionary?
I don't know about this advice. I once fell for one of those nigerian scammers who duped me into giving him my email password. then I changed my password to 'gullible', since I've heard that's not in the dictionary. somehow it was the first thing he guessed. what's worse is I used it for all my accounts, and now he posts idiotic comments as me on slashdot.
how many pairs of boxer shorts should you own?
So first he beats you up, then takes your wallet?
Gamingmuseum.com: Give your 3D accelerator a rest.