Slashdot Mirror
Ask Slashdot: Suitable Phone For a 4-Year Old?
blogologue writes "I have a kid that's turning 4-years old soon, and I'm not able to be with him as often as I want to. To remedy this, I'm looking into whether or not getting him a phone could be a good idea to keep in touch. Being able to have a video chat is important, and as it is rare that a 4-year old has a mobile phone, and because he's got other things to do, it would be good to be able to turn off for example games and so on during time in the kindergarten. So other kids don't go around asking their parents for a smartphone. The main reason for getting the phone is keeping in touch, and as a bonus it can function as a device for games and so on during allowed times. Are there any phones that are suitable for such use? I don't mind if it's Android, iOS or something else, as long as it can be used to make video calls to other Android/iOS phones, and if it features other applications such as games, have limited, pre-defined functionality during certain periods of the day."
Why did you have the kid if you can't be with him? Seriously, don't fuck his head up with a phone at that age. If you can't be with him, make the best of when you can, or stop choosing whatever you chose instead of him. Your fault if he grows fucked up.
Are you serious?
The most "suitable" phone for a 4 year old is one without a battery.
Really, you need to focus on more important things for your child at that age.
If you want news from today, you have to come back tomorrow.
buy him a book, an erector set, lincoln logs. Do not get him hooked on the electronic teat at such a young age. My father was an engineer and even though he worked late hours, he still would take me to the ice cream shop at night and help me with my homework and have dad and son time. The time he spent was quality.
The Revolution Will Not Be Televised
Dude, just don't. I understand you want to speak and see your son, but the reason 4yo don't have phones is because they are not ready for their use. Let the kid play with playmobil and later lego. Let him be a child and when he's ready for a mobile, he'll tell you by putting it on his christmas-list. I wish you wisdom with your decission and hopefully you'll find a beter way to keep in touch with your kid.
The reason we can't Skype is because her and her fat flabby "she-husband" run around the house naked.
A good lawyer would easily take the kid away from them.
Circumcision is child abuse.
A 4 year old shouldnt have a phone, a 14 year old shouldn't have a phone. We really need as a society to get off the cell phone kick. Very few of the people who have a phone need one.
The kind that takes 14 years to deliver. You know, like when your kid is old enough to legally enter into a contract with a cell phone provider.
Don't get HIM a phone. If you must, get a phone that you hand off to his teachers/day-care/babysitters when you aren't around, so you can call in an emergency and so they can call you from a number you recognize in an emergency.
Once you've established that it will be adults in control of the phone, just get any old phone that can do video chat and which is on your network.
But a 4 year old with a phone in his possession, for him to be responsible for? Unless you have very unique requirements and a very responsible almost-4-year-old kid, this is probably not a good idea.
Knowledge is how to play a game, intelligence is how to win, wisdom is knowing what game to play.
Look dude, we understand that you are hurt because she left you for another. And even worse she left you for a "fat flabby girl". But your attitude stinks. Your kid WILL have 2 mothers and a father. That is a fact. If you go around him calling them "cunts" and all sorts of stuff, you will fuck him up, because whether you like it or not he will have affection for them both and there is nothing worse for a kid than having to chose between parents.
So for the kids sake, man up and stop being a jerk. There are loads of decisions that you and your former partner must be able to cooperate around, so you must find a way to be civilized around her.
And back to your question, the kid should not have a phone with him to kindergarten. Not only does it disrupt the kindergarten but it will also get destroyed or lost in a week. Even if he is a little kid he must be able to feel he has his own space, not being constantly on guard because daddy might call. Give him a cheap android tablet that he can have around the house. Then he can be in his room and skype you, without you risking seeing naked people.
Yes, yes, yes. Parents really need to understand how their hate towards someone the child loves will fuck up the child. Seriously, this is important: respect the child's mother for the sake of the child.
I cannot even begin to describe how much my life has been fucked up because of the abandonment fears that fighting between my divorced parents caused. I was always living in the household of a parent that I was told was evil and wicked by the other. And then when one parent got too depressed to care for me I was thrown to the other parent who eventually kicked me to the street. I was used as a weapon for my parents to fight. They were too busy with their hate to see how fucked up I became (and I was booted out for being too depressed--my step-mother was going to leave my father if I didn't go).
The article poster needs to ask himself if he wants the child to have 14 years of spiteful and antagonistic relationships between parents before the child is an adult. Does he want the child to develop attachment issues and develop an intense fear of intimacy? Does he want the child to develop mental health problems that may never be resolved? Or can the poster be a man and treat the mother the way that the child would want?
This seems as good a time as any to remind people not to believe everything they read, that there are trolls on the Internet, and responding to them only encourages them.
This is all summed up in the ancient Internet nugget-o-wisdom "please do not feed the trolls".
Cheers for now.
I would have loved to have had such a device and wish I did have one at that age.
The thing is, its the job of the parent to say no to things that the kid wants that wont be beneficial. Instant gratification taught to the child @ 4 is not a good start to life.
If your kid needs mobile LTE internet, better give him a phone. Otherwise, he's going to get an early start on subversive behavior, perhaps stealing other people's phones.
"If I dont spoil my child he will do bad things" is a terrible justification. If your child does "subversive behavior", you use discipline, and he becomes a better person.
bool
getsCustody(parent)
{
return parent.hasPenis() ? NO : YES;
}
Code like that belongs on the daily WTF... "parent.hasPenis()" is a boolean function.
No sig today...
I agree with the gist of what you are saying - buying a phone won't give the father or the child any more control over how and when they communicate. But:
Why is video chat better than simple audio phone?
I travel for work a lot and Skype video is infinitely better then audio phone for talking to my 3-year-old. If I try to talk to her on the phone she will often either lose interest, listen in silence, or say things like 'I'm playing with this." - "What?" - (holds up toy to phone) - "This!" - "But what is it?" - "It's THIS!"
On video I can talk to her, but also watch her doing her own thing, playing, talking to me when she wants to and showing me things for me to comment on. She can see me, understands better that I am there with her, and neither of us are under pressure to come up with random things to say. It's a completely different experience and one that reassures her when she misses me and lets me see what she is up to, how she is progressing, and understand her mood better.
It matters. A stream of strangers sleeping in the same house, never knowing who's going to be next, is disruptive and unsafe. Those strangers often have direct physical access to the kids, and it should be considered from those grounds, much as running a bed&breakfast in the house should be considered for the child's safety. And if the male, or female lovers have mom over visiting them constantly, what are the arrangements for overnight child care?
The same standards can, and do, apply to single dads who try to date.
You know what, I'm getting very tired at this 'citation needed' crap when someone is clearly providing an anecdote, and not regurgitating research.
It makes you seem smug and smart internally, but really- to anyone with a brain it makes you seem small, petty and very uninteresting.
---Up Up Down Down Left Right Left Right B A START