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Scientists Says Jellyfish Are Taking Over the Oceans
Hugh Pickens DOT Com writes "Karla Cripps reports at CNN that a combination of overfishing, warming water, low oxygen and pollution are creating perfect conditions for jellyfish to multiply. "The jellyfish seem to be the ones that are flourishing in this while everything else is suffering," says Australian jellyfish researcher Lisa-ann Gershwin. In 2000, a bloom of sea tomato jellyfish in Australia was so enormous — it stretched for more than 1,000 miles from north to south — that it was even visible from space. While most blooms are not quite that big, Gershwin's survey of research on jellyfish from the last few decades indicate that populations are most likely on the rise, and that this boom is taking place in an ocean that is faced with overfishing, acid rain, nutrient pollution from fertilizers and climate change, among other problems. This past summer, southern Europe experienced one of its worst jellyfish infestations ever. Experts there have been reporting a steady increase in the number of jellyfish in the Mediterranean Sea for years. With more than 2,000 species of jellyfish swimming through the world's waters, most stings are completely harmless, some will leave you in excruciating pain, then there are the killers. There are several species of big box jellyfish that have caused many deaths — these include chironex fleckeri in Australia, known as the "most lethal jellyfish in the world whose sting can kill in three minutes. "Just the lightest brush — you don't even feel it — and then, whammo, you're in more pain than you ever could have imagined, and you are struggling to breathe and you can't move your limbs and you can't stop vomiting and your blood pressure just keeps going up and up," says Gershwin. "It is really surprising how many places they occur around the world — places you would never expect: Hawaii, Caribbean, Florida, Wales, New Caledonia, Thailand, Malaysia, Philippines, India ... as well as Australia.""
Slashdot headline 50 years from now:
"Scientists Says Turtles Are Taking Over the Oceans"
(The typo is intentional, because even in 50 years, /. will still lack quality control.)
"It is really surprising how many places they occur around the world — places you would never expect: Hawaii, Caribbean, Florida, Wales, New Caledonia, Thailand, Malaysia, Philippines, India ... as well as Australia.""
No, places I would never expect would be Kansas, Siberia and the middle of the Sahara. If cable television has taught me anything, it's that the sea is out to kill me. If I can smell saltwater in the air, I'm expecting some explosion of deadliness.
Is there a better way to cook them?
Can't we just flip the world over? That way, all of the jellyfish will drain onto the turtles, all the way down.
Shortest animal in a bar joke ever. So this baby seal walks into this club.
Maybe because Jelly fish tastes like slimy Jello that paralyzes your tong?
Too bad there's no use for jellyfish in traditional Chinese medicine. No it's always tiger dicks and rhino horns and elephant tusks and other stuff from endangered species.
Actually...hey you know I heard that eating about 10lbs of jellyfish per day will totally make your dick huge and hard and give it super-strength, 4 realz. Pass it on! Especially eastward!
"When information is power, privacy is freedom" - Jah-Wren Ryel
In my country, terawatt globes are reserved for police helicopter chases and warning sailors of hazardous shoals. This is despite the fact that practically every living creature there can kill you in under three minutes. Our primary spoken language is screaming.
http://www.27bslash6.com/halogen.html
The stiff parts of gargantuan or viscous animals have always been a target for those who want to gain raging, gargantuan stiff parts themselves, since you are what you eat. The placebo effect is not so strong when you tell a guy, "this small, inert floppy goop-sack will do the trick!"
I wish your marketing campaign luck anyway.
The placebo effect is not so strong when you tell a guy, "this small, inert floppy goop-sack will do the trick!"
So, then we should try touting increased bust size then?
If it's for-profit but free, you're not the customer -- you're the product (e.g., the Slashdot Beta's "audience").