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The Next Keurig Will Make Your Coffee With a Dash of "DRM"

Posted by samzenpus on from the pirate-coffee-is-the-best-coffee dept.

FuzzNugget writes "Apparently seeking to lock competitors out of the burgeoning single-serve coffee market, Green Mountain Coffee Roasters, maker of the popular Keurig coffee machines, will make their new machines work with licensed pods only. GMCR's CEO confirmed this in a statement: 'The much-anticipated ‘Keurig 2.0’ single-cup brewing system with ‘interactive readability’ (that doesn’t work with unlicensed/copycat pods) will offer such “game-changing functionality” that consumers - and unlicensed players - will want to switch.'"

60 of 769 comments (clear)

  1. Why? by B33rNinj4 · · Score: 5, Interesting

    Is it really so hard to just grind the beans and brew it yourself? I do this every morning.

    1. Re:Why? by jxander · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Downside : a normal coffee brew process generates 6-12 cups of Joe.

      I guess we could all switch to a press ... but that's a bit messy and requires a stand alone heating method (I've not the space to keep a proper tea kettle on my office desk)

      Keurig provides a clean single-cup solution

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    2. Re:Why? by hawguy · · Score: 3, Informative

      Downside : a normal coffee brew process generates 6-12 cups of Joe.

      I guess we could all switch to a press ... but that's a bit messy and requires a stand alone heating method (I've not the space to keep a proper tea kettle on my office desk)

      Keurig provides a clean single-cup solution

      Just use an immersion heater in your coffee mug to heat the water before you dump it in the press.

    3. Re:Why? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

      Somehow I just don't trust drinking my coffee that we brewed out of a Lexmark ink cartridge.

    4. Re:Why? by jratcliffe · · Score: 4, Insightful

      I can't imagine the people using Keurigs are actually saving any money over just going to a place like Dunkin' Donuts.

      Keurig machine is about $120. The pods are about $0.65 each (less if you buy in bulk, or on sale, etc.). Small coffee at DD is $1.49. So, you're saving about $0.85/cup. You cover the cost of the machine after about 140 cups, so you definitely are saving money, even more if you're comparing to buying at Starbucks.

    5. Re:Why? by alphatel · · Score: 5, Informative

      Downside : a normal coffee brew process generates 6-12 cups of Joe.

      I guess we could all switch to a press ... but that's a bit messy and requires a stand alone heating method (I've not the space to keep a proper tea kettle on my office desk)

      Keurig provides a clean single-cup solution

      Are you on crack? We boil water in an electric kettle in 2.5 minutes, then pour into a press, and blammo, coffee. Keurig provides stupid, bland, watery goop that doesn't leave you with a bunch of grinds to clean up. However, it is neither greener, nor more efficient or even easier really.

      --
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    6. Re:Why? by EMG+at+MU · · Score: 4, Informative

      Every coffee maker I have owned in the past 8 years has had a 1-4 cup option.

    7. Re:Why? by roc97007 · · Score: 4, Interesting

      Downside : a normal coffee brew process generates 6-12 cups of Joe.

      I guess we could all switch to a press ... but that's a bit messy and requires a stand alone heating method (I've not the space to keep a proper tea kettle on my office desk)

      Keurig provides a clean single-cup solution

      It creates a lot of waste, though. Trendy, but not very green. Kind of like the personal electronics industry.

      --
      Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
    8. Re:Why? by carlhaagen · · Score: 4, Interesting

      It's about the cost, not the coffee or the effort. High price tags attract people who suffer the "spender syndrome" - dishing out a lot of money on something even plain or generic gives these people a feeling of being above the average, being set aside from the rest of us, of enjoying something that is "exclusive" only to their kind.

      It's like when you find the exact same piece of generic furniture sold at (but not designed by) IKEA in some upstreet furniture shop - IKEA would call it "ROBUST" (or whatever) and sell it for $89, while the other "boutique" will call it "Multimedia bench in Nordic pinewood" at thrice the pricetag. People with money will buy it, and they will feel like they did a better deal than paying $89 at IKEA. It's one of the oldest tricks in the book of retail.

    9. Re:Why? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Informative

      Starbuck's Via is also a clean single-cup solution. It is cheaper, smaller and more dependable than the Keurig machine. It is also a format that would be very hard to add DRM, etc.
      Since Keurig wants to punish its customers, I will forgo their stupidity.
      Keurig, like Beta, sucks.

    10. Re:Why? by dreamchaser · · Score: 3, Insightful

      Not to mention that the Keurig doesn't make coffee that tastes anywhere near as good as fresh ground and brewed or pressed coffee.

    11. Re:Why? by wisnoskij · · Score: 4, Informative

      Coffee makers make a little or as much coffee as you want. If you want one cup, only put one cup or water and a proportionate amount of grounds. And you have the added benefit that while brewing many cups of Keurig is a linearly hard problem (meaning that it takes 20 times longer to brew 20 cups), conventional brewing is not.
      When you actually in a situation where you are brewing a lot of coffee, the conventional method becomes more efficient per cup.

      Any computer programmer should be able to tell you which is the overall more efficient solution for the general situation.

      --
      Troll is not a replacement for I disagree.
    12. Re:Why? by jxander · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Does caffeine count as crack?

      No electric kettles in the office. Fire hazard (also no space heaters, or various other personal electronics). They probably shouldn't allow coffee pots either, but YOU try to tell a hundred or so office monkeys that they can't have coffee. Good luck. I suppose I could get a nice tea cosy to disguise the kettle... but like you said, then there's the grounds to deal with. Shaking the press doesn't really get much out of it, and the fire marshal REALLY frowns on my compost pile in my office.

      Keureg is hardly a perfect solution, but it's self contained and low maintenance.

      --
      This signature is false.
    13. Re:Why? by CanHasDIY · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Plus, Coffee is high in antioxidants and good for your heart.

      You realize that some antioxidants are actually carcinogenic, and that increasing your intake of antioxidants may not have any healthful benefit, but may in fact be harming you?

      --
      An enigma, wrapped in a riddle, shrouded in bacon and cheese
    14. Re:Why? by Charliemopps · · Score: 4, Informative

      Um... Keurig sucks. I've had their coffee, it's expensive and tastes bland.

      I've been using this for nearly a decade: http://www.amazon.com/Melitta-...

      Taste great, 1 cup and I can use actual REAL coffee in it!
      also, in a pinch you can make one of these out of a paper cup by poking holes in it and sticking in a regular old filter. The key is not to make the holes too big so the cofee steeps in the hot water for long enough.

    15. Re:Why? by Jarik+C-Bol · · Score: 4, Informative

      There is no cholesterol in coffee. Coffee does contain the molecule cafestol at about .06% by weight in each coffee bean, and cafestol has been correlated with increased 'bad' cholesterol, (but other positive health effects) and there has been no evidence that paper filters removes cafestol.

      --
      I've decided to Diversify my Holdings. I've divided my cash between my left and right pockets, instead of all in one.
    16. Re:Why? by ynp7 · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Any computer programmer should also be able to tell you that programming computers requires at least one full pot of coffee, making a Keurig the worst possible solution ever.

    17. Re:Why? by PolygamousRanchKid+ · · Score: 4, Insightful

      However, it is neither greener, nor more efficient or even easier really.

      The "Green Mountain" in their company names refers to the piles of green dollars that they are making with this crap.

      --
      Schroedinger's Brexit: The UK is both in and out of the EU at the same time!
    18. Re:Why? by NikeHerc · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Keurig provides a clean single-cup solution ...

      Keurig coffee costs about $30/pound in the local big-name grocery store. I don't know which is worse: DRM or hideously overpriced coffee. I would avoid Keurig like the plague for either reason.

      --
      Circle the wagons and fire inward. Entropy increases without bounds.
    19. Re:Why? by hawguy · · Score: 3, Funny

      So, fun fact. I've recently come to terms with an ugly fact : I have a legitimate physical addiction to caffeine. If I go a full day without, I get headaches by the end of the day.

      Hardly the worst withdrawal symptoms ever, and defeated by some motrin and water ... but still, a bit upsetting. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to indulge my habit

      For this reason, I included caffeine tablets in my 72-hour earthquake survival kit. I don't want to be fighting caffeine withdrawl at the same time I'm searching for shelter. I don't trust Starbucks to have emergency power and water plus enough beans in-stock to feed my addition in case of disaster.

    20. Re:Why? by ttucker · · Score: 5, Informative

      I brew my coffee in a press every morning. It takes about 3 minutes to boil, brew, and clean, an AeroPress.

      http://aerobie.com/products/ae...

    21. Re:Why? by ttucker · · Score: 4, Insightful

      He probably has a conical burr grinder, which requires no cleanup at all.

    22. Re:Why? by Archangel+Michael · · Score: 3, Informative

      I have an inductive hot water pot, it is about as safe as anything possible. You tell me it is a fire hazard, and I'll find a dozen more likely sources in your office.

      The only thing that gets hot is the water pot portion. And it is separated from the induction base, which remains coolish. An Incandescent (you remember those?) bulb is hotter.

      --
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    23. Re:Why? by serviscope_minor · · Score: 4, Funny

      Your forgetting the grinding of the fresh beans to put in that press.

      I outsource the grinding of my coffee. I like to think it's brocken up into small pieces by an army of underpaid 3rd world seratshop labourers equipped with tiny mallettes. However, the blurb on the back of the many packets of ready-ground coffee do not confirm or deny this.

      --
      SJW n. One who posts facts.
    24. Re:Why? by AmiMoJo · · Score: 5, Informative

      I have not tried the Keurig but other coffee pod machines I have used and owned produce single cups of pretty damn good coffee, complete with frothed milk, and there is basically zero mess. No mucking about with filters and pots and grinding up beans and aerating milk and all that crap.

      Okay, if I could be bothered I could brew a slightly better cup the traditional way. But with pods I have variety and almost zero effort, ideal for work. It's a very small compromise for a very big gain.

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    25. Re:Why? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Informative

      One word: Aeropress.

    26. Re:Why? by jxander · · Score: 3, Funny

      Plus, I can tell everyone in the office that I'm going for a Brazilian.

      --
      This signature is false.
    27. Re:Why? by Greyfox · · Score: 4, Funny

      Telling me I can't have my coffee in the morning is more of a fire hazard. I'll let you figure out why.

      --

      I'm trying to teach myself to set people on fire with my mind... Is it hot in here?

    28. Re:Why? by hawguy · · Score: 3, Funny

      you must have a tiny-ass mug then. I Have a Cuisinart maker that grinds, and has a 4 cup setting, which perfectly fills my travel mug.

      that is by biggest complaint about the Keurig - to fill a decent size mug, you need 2 cups on the large setting. at that point you get into the Buy at coffee shop kinda price per cup.

      I think you meant to reply to the grandparent poster. I don't have a tiny-ass mug, I have a tiny ass-mug.

    29. Re: Why? by lecoupdejarnac · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Not only is it less green, but it seems most people don't think about the fact that these machines inject hot water through cheap disposable plastic cups. Lots of coffee machines have plastic parts that the hot water passes through, leaching endocrine-disrupting phthalates as it heats the plastic, right into your coffee cup. I'll stick with my metal water kettle and glass French press.

    30. Re:Why? by Bob+the+Super+Hamste · · Score: 4, Funny

      The way to avoid getting busted for having a coffee maker in your office is to put the coffee maker in an old computer case and run the plug out the back. One of my foreign coworkers has this setup in the server room he works in and in the 6 years I have known him no one in management or facilities maintenance has found it and no one else in the office will turn him in as they have started doing the same thing.

      --
      Time to offend someone
  2. Horrible coffee by Tough+Love · · Score: 4, Funny

    Coffee from pods is an affront dignity anyway. Get a proper espresso machine, or use a press.

    --
    When all you have is a hammer, every problem starts to look like a thumb.
    1. Re:Horrible coffee by jonwil · · Score: 3, Funny

      Unless you personally witnessed the beans being ground, its not proper coffee :)

    2. Re:Horrible coffee by sunderland56 · · Score: 5, Insightful

      The regular Keurig machine makes filtered coffee; it is not an espresso machine. It makes coffee under pressure - more pressure than a drip machine, obviously, but much less than a proper espresso machine.

      Yeah, I used to be a coffee snob too. The convenience of having a fresh, hot cup of coffee within a minute of stumbling downstairs every morning is worth a lot; not having to clean the grounds out of a french press is worth a lot too. Tastes vary, but with 50 or more varieties, there's usually something worth drinking. And, hey, convenience is what sells today; otherwise people would wait to get home to make their phone calls.

    3. Re:Horrible coffee by qazxswedc · · Score: 3, Funny

      Unless you bought the beans green and roasted them yourself, it's not proper coffee :D

    4. Re:Horrible coffee by Ambvai · · Score: 5, Funny

      Unless you hate the beans yourself and picked them out of the toilet before roasting them...

      Well. You might also have to be a civet.

    5. Re:Horrible coffee by hey! · · Score: 4, Funny

      It follows that blind people have never tasted proper coffee.

      --
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    6. Re:Horrible coffee by Adriax · · Score: 5, Insightful

      How about we just skip to the end of the chain?

      Unless you created a pocket universe, started a creation event, formed stars from the resulting big bang cloud, fused a solar system worth of hydrogen into heavier matter, collected the matter into a planet in the perfect orbit, formed a primordial soup, created life from the soup, evolved the life to create coffee bean producers, harvested the beans, processed and roasted the beans, ground them, and finally pressed them yourself, then it's not proper coffee.

      --
      I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!
    7. Re:Horrible coffee by ebh · · Score: 5, Funny

      You forgot all the steps it took to evolve the civets.

    8. Re:Horrible coffee by GreyWolf3000 · · Score: 4, Informative

      Cleaning the grounds out of a french press is awful. The aeropress completely fixes that problem.

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    9. Re:Horrible coffee by Jarik+C-Bol · · Score: 3, Funny

      If you scrounge around Google for say, 17 seconds, and maybe use the worlds 'Insulated', 'French' and 'Press', preferably in that order, you will find, I kid you not; a veritable cornucopia of products that will satisfy your demands.

      --
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  3. That $30 Mr. Coffee Espresso maker... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Interesting

    That $30 Mr. Coffee espresso maker that breaks down after two years actually makes better economic sense. I amortized the busted unit over two years (sometimes longer) and achieved $0.57/shot espresso. Keurig can suck it.

    1. Re:That $30 Mr. Coffee Espresso maker... by Anubis+IV · · Score: 3, Informative

      By my math, you're saving just $0.01/serving over a Keurig, and you're losing a lot more time on rote actions such as measuring out beans, grinding them, packing the grounds, and cleaning the equipment. Keurig users seem like they probably got the better end of that deal.

      As for my math...
      Assumption: For the sake of argument, the $120 Keurig only lasts for two years, just like your $30 Mr. Coffee
      Assumption: Coffee drinker drinks two cups a day for two years = 1460 servings
      Assumption: An average Keurig pod costs $0.50
      Cost of pods = 1460 servings * $0.50 = $730
      Cost of machine = $120
      Amortized cost = ($730 + $120) / 1460 servings = $0.58/serving

      I tried to base most of my assumptions on numbers that favored you. For instance, though most people buying pods are likely to buy them in bulk for well under $0.50, I went with $0.50 since it was roughly in the middle of the range of prices I was seeing on Amazon. I also assumed that the Keurig would fail after just two years, despite all anecdotal evidence I'm aware of indicating that it would likely last much longer. Similarly, I went with a low rate of consumption so that the higher cost of the Keurig machine would play a greater role in the amortized cost, thus favoring your argument.

      And yet, despite all of that, the difference was surprisingly just $0.01. I didn't game the numbers to try and get that result. It really did just happen to work out that way.

      TL;DR: I'm not recommending Keurig machines, but I also wouldn't suggest that your use case represents a cost savings of any significance. In fact, I'd argue that most people would rather incur the $0.01 cost in order to be free of the hassle of dealing with everything your machine involves.

  4. And just like Sony ... by Jumperalex · · Score: 5, Informative

    they deserve to fail miserably and go down in flames.

    --
    If you can't be good, be good at it!
  5. Really? by Spad · · Score: 5, Insightful

    How much "game-changing functionality" can you really work into a fucking coffee machine?

    1. Re:Really? by nurb432 · · Score: 4, Insightful

      To be fair, i think including DRM IS game changing functionality, just in a bad way. Lets hope it fails in the market and others dont follow down that path.

      ( I dont drink mud water and even i know this is a bad precedent )

      --
      ---- Booth was a patriot ----
    2. Re:Really? by jd2112 · · Score: 4, Funny

      How much "game-changing functionality" can you really work into a fucking coffee machine?

      It turns into a coffee fucking machine. See how I did that?

      So that's where the cream comes from...

      --
      Any insufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from technology.
    3. Re:Really? by CCarrot · · Score: 4, Informative

      How much "game-changing functionality" can you really work into a fucking coffee machine?

      To me, it sounds like they're planning on emulating Tassimo and their bar-coded brewing system, so the user can use 'milk' pods, tea pods, etc. and the system will brew them differently depending on the scanned and recognized contents (temperature for sure, pressure maybe? size? IDK)

      What they seem to be 'forgetting' is that it was the flexibility and simplicity of the K-Cup system that actually gained them the dominant market share in the first place. Sure you can brew cappucinos and lattes with the Tassimo...but you can use your own favorite coffee brand with the Keurig My K-Cup reusable filter, freshly ground if that's your thing, or spooned out of a Maxwell House container to save money / env. wastage on each cup. Heck, I use my My K-Cup to hold loose tea leaves when I feel like a specialty cuppa...and they're good for two to three cups, too.

      Nope, if they disable their whole BYO ability, I predict that they will wind up in a small corner of a niche market. If they relent and provide a My K-Cup equivalent for the 2.0...well, it's just barely possible that they could survive this bone-headed move, although people will grumble about not having cheap generics available. Either way, watch for stock prices to plunge.

      --
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  6. Keuring coffee? No thanks. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    I only drink certified genuine OEM HP inkjet printer ink. It's much cheaper than Keuring.

  7. Not my cup of tea by sideslash · · Score: 4, Funny

    Reminds me of when Microsoft attempted to make their own (proprietary, locked in) java.

  8. Anti competitive by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Interesting

    This won't be legal to sell in Europe by the sounds of it..

    1. Re:Anti competitive by climb_no_fear · · Score: 4, Funny

      That coffee is so bad, that it isn't legal in Europe anyway.

  9. The Real Question by CanHasDIY · · Score: 3, Interesting

    The real question is - after the "Keurig 2.0" hits the shelves, will I be able to use the "Keurig 2.0" pods with my "Keurig 1.0?"

    Or are they going to screw themselves out of my money by trying to force me to "update" to the new model (probably by altering the design of the K-Cup ever-so-slightly), thereby ensuring that the only products I buy for my existing $160 coffee maker are non-Green Mountain brand?

    --
    An enigma, wrapped in a riddle, shrouded in bacon and cheese
  10. close the pod bay door, HAL by Thud457 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Sorry Dave, I can't let you brew that.

    I'd damn sure reprogram his memory banks with an very large axe for that kind of insubordination.

    --

    the preceding comment is my own and in no way reflects the opinion of the Joint Chiefs of Staff

  11. Re:"Interactive" by hawguy · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Insert pod, push button. How much interactivity does making coffee *need*?

    I'm guessing that the chip in the pod tailors the brewing cycle for the coffee (or tea) in the pod for the best possible quality. Well, as "best" as you can get with pre-ground beans that have sat on the shelf in a pod for a few months.

  12. Re:Not DRM, just an old business model by nurb432 · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Not quite the same thing. This would prevent a 3rd party from making a cheaper cartridge for your razor.

    --
    ---- Booth was a patriot ----
  13. Re:Keurig patents expired... by Jarik+C-Bol · · Score: 3, Insightful

    I've seen 'off brand' K-Cup brewers around, so I think this move is pretty much designed to sucker people into buying something that they recently patented, and can control for a few more years.

    --
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  14. Re:Keurig patents expired... by Macgrrl · · Score: 4, Insightful

    I'm really surprised to have gotten this far down the thread without anyone mentioning the parallels to ink jet cartridges with DRM. I'm looking at you Epson.

    --
    Sara
    Designer, Gamer, Macgrrl in an XP World
  15. Re:Attention, MODS! by Chysn · · Score: 4, Funny

    > It is spelled *expresso* not *espresso*. I am from Italy. I would know.

    The letter X isn't used in Italian. Seems like the kind of thing you would know.

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  16. Re:Easy clean, cheap solution by TranquilVoid · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Firstly, so many people drink shit coffee that how you make it is irrelevant

    Yep, I'm cringing reading through this discussion of Americans debating which coffee is best.

    What's next, Canadians arguing over whether the most offensive word is "damn" or "bum"?

    Karma-burning out of the way, what you describe sounds like it would be very mild coffee, poured quickly over the grounds rather than steeped? Typically coffee snobs go for Italian espresso which is far stronger. The principles are;

    1. Beans must be fresh. One week after roasting is the optimal time (the beans de-gas), and they should be ground on demand. Supermarket beans are often sitting there for months.
    2. The grinder is more important than the machine. You want a very consistent grind that doesn't raise the heat of the beans. So saying I've A/B-ed an expensive burr grinder with a cheap one and couldn't notice the difference in the end cup.

    Another interesting style is Toddy's cold-brewed. You simply place a lot of grounds in a large plunger, fill it with cold water and leave it in the fridge for 12 hours. Plunge and pour into another container, keeping the coffee in the fridge (stays fresh for a week) to use as a base. Pour some into your cup, heat in the microwave and add milk and sugar as desired. Because it was extracted with cold water the taste is incredibly smooth with very little bitterness.