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Scientists Discover Meaning of Life Through Massive Computing Project
First time accepted submitter Rabbit327 writes In a stunning announcement today scientists have announced that after millions of cycles of computing time on some of the largest super computers that they have discovered the meaning of life. On April 1st 2015 at approximately 03:42 GMT scientists discovered that a long running program had finished. The results stunned scientists who were having tea in the other room when the alarm went off. According to the scientific team the answer was stunning yet confusing. Quoting one scientist "It's amazing. It worked! But what does it mean?!? For heaven's sake we spent all this time calculating the answer to the ultimate question about life, the universe, and everything. This is the answer we get?!? This is the bloody answer we get?!?!??!?" after which the scientist promptly threw a keyboard across the room. According to inside sources the answer given by the computer was "42". What this means will be announced later according to a research representative.
Not even funny. Someone please make it STOP!!!
"Transparent" is a shit show that trades on every stereotype going. A man in drag is NOT a transsexual.
It's April 2nd here ....
41.9999999999999387
Table-ized A.I.
The answer wasn't 42. It was BORING.
You fucked this spoof of so ridiculously, I'm surprised you even got 42 right.
Stop. Seriously, Just fucking stop.
JUST STOP, NO ONE WANTS YOU TO POST THIS CRAP, READ THE GOD DAMN COMMENTS ON EVERY STORY POSTED TODAY.
If you're going to post this shit, you at least have to have read the book before you start making shit up.
Persistent Volume manager for Kubernetes - https://github.com/dwimsey/openshift-pvmanager
You, Dice's editors, all love SF, and spam /. with all the legends, but ENOUGH is fracking ENOUGH. Maturity is about knowing when to stop, and I think we've way beyond reason...
This is proof.
didn't the pranks stop at noon? Stop breaking the April Fools Rules!
Seriously. They knew the answer a long time ago. The whole purpose of Earth is to figure out the question. If you're going to continue with these inane posts, at least have someone who knows the subject matter do the writing. Seriously.
I'm sorry guys - this is a little OTT, and a trillion miles away from subtle or funny. You want a proper April fools? Try the one I saw at a subreddit within Reddit: https://twitter.com/TeslaMotor...
Why OpalCalc is the best Windows calc
Please.
OK, now that the whole front page is non-fool gags, are we done now?
Either post some actual April-fool type stories, or go back to regular news.
Please?
Ignorance killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.
It is official; Netcraft now confirms: *BSD is dying
One more crippling bombshell hit the already beleaguered *BSD community when IDC confirmed that *BSD market share has dropped yet again, now down to less than a fraction of 1 percent of all servers. Coming close on the heels of a recent Netcraft survey which plainly states that *BSD has lost more market share, this news serves to reinforce what we've known all along. *BSD is collapsing in complete disarray, as fittingly exemplified by failing dead last in the recent Sys Admin comprehensive networking test.
You don't need to be a Kreskin to predict *BSD's future. The hand writing is on the wall: *BSD faces a bleak future. In fact there won't be any future at all for *BSD because *BSD is dying. Things are looking very bad for *BSD. As many of us are already aware, *BSD continues to lose market share. Red ink flows like a river of blood.
FreeBSD is the most endangered of them all, having lost 93% of its core developers. The sudden and unpleasant departures of long time FreeBSD developers Jordan Hubbard and Mike Smith only serve to underscore the point more clearly. There can no longer be any doubt: FreeBSD is dying.
Let's keep to the facts and look at the numbers.
OpenBSD leader Theo states that there are 7000 users of OpenBSD. How many users of NetBSD are there? Let's see. The number of OpenBSD versus NetBSD posts on Usenet is roughly in ratio of 5 to 1. Therefore there are about 7000/5 = 1400 NetBSD users. BSD/OS posts on Usenet are about half of the volume of NetBSD posts. Therefore there are about 700 users of BSD/OS. A recent article put FreeBSD at about 80 percent of the *BSD market. Therefore there are (7000+1400+700)*4 = 36400 FreeBSD users. This is consistent with the number of FreeBSD Usenet posts.
Due to the troubles of Walnut Creek, abysmal sales and so on, FreeBSD went out of business and was taken over by BSDI who sell another troubled OS. Now BSDI is also dead, its corpse turned over to yet another charnel house.
All major surveys show that *BSD has steadily declined in market share. *BSD is very sick and its long term survival prospects are very dim. If *BSD is to survive at all it will be among OS dilettante dabblers. *BSD continues to decay. Nothing short of a cockeyed miracle could save *BSD from its fate at this point in time. For all practical purposes, *BSD is dead.
Fact: *BSD is dying
Yeah, I know it's only one day, but please stop these uninteresting parodies. Thank you. I want my real slashdot news back.
What did the little white mice have to say about it? Any comments there?
The day we all ignore slashdot.
Bit late to the party, 1/4/15 was yesterday.
I don't like sci-fi. I never have, and I never will. It just doesn't interest me, even as somebody who works with math and technology on a daily basis.
While I know all of these submissions are bullshit, I don't even know what the fuck they're talking about.
I vaguely got the V'Ger one, having sat through that godawful movie, but the rest of them are a frigging mystery to me.
Today wasn't just a day of shitty joke submissions. It was a day of shitty nonsensical submissions.
Wow even if it was still April first this would be just plain aweful, but on April second it is just really REALLY sad
Meaning life once discovered can measured with math then encoded digitally, the brain stem (Systemd fork linux kernel) Niggers shit ass Alice hill nigger shit pussy fuck /. deleted my post
...is the deluge of butthurt posts hating on the April Fools posts. It's one damn day and everybody's acting like it's the end of the world. You have all become the joke
Anyone know of a slashdot alternative site? This site is getting really annoying to read, to the point I'm wondering why bother.
Enough is enough.
Stop, it's now lunchtime on April the 2nd here in NZ.
Do ONE April fools post if you HAVE to, otherwise don't do any, it's childish, pathetic shit.
I am finding these stories very entertaining...
/. trolls with a stick. Because if was your goal, you just won at the Internet....
Oh, the stories aren't that great, chuckleworth at best, but certainly not actually funny. The entertainment factor is all the people who are absolutely losing their shit over these stories. You would think that someone just deleted the last known copy of 'Star Wars' for all the nerd rage that is going on.
Slashdot Editors, please tell me that the real April fool's joke is poking the
HA! I just wasted some of your bandwidth with a frivolous sig!
For tea too or coffee too? I prefer its about the coffee, its my goto choice of beverage.
Tomorrow us Thursday, the Vogons will be here to destroy the planet.
A real April Fools is a false story that fools some or most people into believing it. I can't believe that a single person was fooled by any of these so-called April Fools stories on /. today.
Apparently, the article posters don't understand April Fools at all. Especially the part where you actually have to fool someone with your prank.
Or more specifically in binary your get 101010 which arranged into truth table gives
1 01
0 10
Also known as the inverted Marx gate because if you input TRUE it say, RIGHT.
At the big bang. That lead to more 'normal' matter and less anti-matter, which lead to everything else. Likely the only way an imbalance could be created was another big bang, which had 42 more positrons, leading to an alternate universe, with the same starting point, so like is identical in every way.
ta da tss!
You've got it! The Question(tm)! Does this mean we can quit nailing people to trees and stuff?
His ignorance covered the whole earth like a blanket, and there was hardly a hole in it anywhere. - Mark Twain
You're not obligated to post here, you know? One little thing here that you don't like isn't going to make or break the website or your fragile, petty, insecure lives.
If you don't like it... close the tab and move on. It's really simple.
Let me guess... April fools
It was funny, I laughed. But then I'm the kind of person who finds Douglas Adams jokes and references to be funny.
Worst. April Fools Day. Ever.
for embarrassingly bad 4/1 stuff.
"Win treats sysadmins better than users. Mac treats users better than sysadmins. Linux treats everyone like sysadmins."
I cringed hard.
There is no meaning of life. It occurred by accident and will eventually end by accident. It is likely to have already occurred elsewhere, and it is already likely to have ended elsewhere.
You can believe what you want about the afterlife, but that's all that it is. After. Life.
We are not cogs in a grand machine. We're just the detritus on the workshop floor that no one cares about and would really rather see tossed in the trash.
Well, Monty Python discovered it some decades ago with no computing power at all
This is ONLY my interpretation. I have no spell check. 4 is comprised of 3 and 1. 3 stands for Universe or perfection (so perfect it seems to allow for imperfection). 1 stands for the one conscious being experiencing the Universe. 2 stands for a couple. In the Bible 40 stands for a really long period of time. And again I claim that 2 stands for a couple. My web page: Http://alamar.webege.com
http://alamar.webege.com
it was funny the first 100 times.
also, if it was posted as news on CNN or whatever, sure yeah, a link to there would be worth it. but this year slashdot was just full of these fucking shitty old "jokes" that were posted only to slashdot. like, for april 1st slashdot turned into an original news site with no source attribution or nothing. shitty jokes with links to something that explains the joke and no other link in the summary(that is to say the "summary" became the article).
it's shit.
it's shit.
world was created 5 seconds before this post as it is.
"They will never believe us."
That was the number. Somehow 42 meson, masquerading as electrons (likely baryons because of their decay rate is a bit longer than bosons) unbalanced the big bang. That lead to a pollutant in the universe called 'matter'. All sorts of problems have happened since matter was created. Thankfully not much of it was created, when you consider the normal state of the universe, so call dark matter. The good news is the nature of symmetry requires another big bang happened where 42 mesons, likely created an 'anti-matter' universe. In time the two universes should overlap and reconcile the 42 baryons and bosons, leaving two universe whole once again. It's just an issue of time, which only exists because of the imbalance. Once that's undone, time will not exist and all this foolishness will be ... undone.
Can we just wait! Odd, after wait will have no meaning.
In a stunning announcement today scientists have announced that after millions of cycles of computing time
You mean a fraction of a second? Now that is impressive!
At the big bang. That lead to more 'normal' matter and less anti-matter, which lead to everything else. Likely the only way an imbalance could be created was another big bang, which had 42 more positrons, leading to an alternate universe, with the same starting point, so like is identical in every way.
That is a *fucking awesome* explanation!!! Bravo, Sir!
My ism, it's full of beliefs.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?...
Based on the comments on this thread I believe that most Slash dotters hope you posted that posthumously
Ok. Here we are HHG2TG. Great series, just too much ridiculous fun, great movie. Marvin reminds me that all the haters have a 'brain the size of a planet' and haven't worked out that the long arm of the geek turning them into a bunch of whining sock puppets. I'm laughing to think those posts can't be undone, does reddit let you do that?
Frankly the last two weeks for me have been filled with messaging systems, state based machines, programming signal processors, doing intelligence tests, psychometric tests, reasoning tests, language tests, reading and analyzing a bill of law, speaking in public, writing to politicians to stop something dumb, on top of being eaten by mites, 36 hours without sleep, my bedroom flooding and now I am sleeping on the floor in another room. So don't mind the geek distraction.
A great opportunity for an on topic discussion about a geeky puzzle to figure out the movie/book and enjoy it. I don't mind playing, I loved this series. I am geek! I didn't read the books though - loved the BBC series. Great work on the movie.
I haven't figured out the next puzzle yet so maybe I haven't seen this one, but so far my geek credentials are pretty high. Yes people who used to play Dungeons and Dragons used to be as lame as you think this all is and just didn't care what you think, still don't. Great puzzle /. I think I'm missing 2 so far.
April fool on the haters, absolutely hilarious.
My ism, it's full of beliefs.
Scientists Discover Meaning of Life Through Massive Computing Project
Mystics Discover Meaning of Life Through Sitting and Meditating.
One is far more resource efficient than the other, and has more practical results.
later ? you mean 7.... (days?) 7....(weeks ???) 7.....(?????!!!!!what?) 7 million years.
So the question (?!) boils down to: do you count your age from zero or one? It says from one! I had the issue once with a policeman, he poked me up from a park and we discussed, he asked for dates and I gave him the date, then he declared I was a year older than I count. Are you sure the program was run THIS YEAR? Or started at the end of the last year a little offset...? Do not feel like revealing more here. Real issue... :-|