Extortionists Begin Targeting AshleyMadison Users, Demand Bitcoin

tsu doh nimh writes: It was bound to happen: Brian Krebs reports that extortionists have begun emailing people whose information is included in the leaked Ashleymadison.com user database, threatening to find and contact the target's spouse and alert them if the recipient fails to cough up 1 Bitcoin. Krebs interviews one guy who got such a demand, a user who admits to having had an affair after meeting a woman on the site and who is now worried about the fallout, which he said could endanger his happily married life with his wife and kids. Perhaps inevitable: two Canadian law firms have filed a class action lawsuit against the company, seeking more than half a billion dollars in damages.

Comments

Happily married?

[Anonymous Coward]

Seems to be at odds with having an affair.

Re:Happily married?

[Rei]

Not too much to judge about you. But a heck of a lot to judge about her. "Yeah, I'm going to take this guy for free housing and money and labour, and in exchange for that I'm going to do the one thing that would hurt most spouses the most, rather than being honest with him about me not being physically interested in him - because that could possibly ruin this good freeloading thing I've got going on!"

BTW, I find it amazing how many people manage to reach adulthood without noticing that pretty much every relationship starts out full of passion and longing but slowly degrades into a more roomate-like mode. It doesn't mean that John the gardener that you met a couple weeks ago is actually everything you've always longed for and that you had just been deceiving yourself about ever having loved your spouse - it's that you're a human freaking being and this is how human emotions work. And the exact same thing will happen with John the gardener, and you'll once again convince yourself that you never really felt anything for him either, but hey, this NEW guy, wow, he's the real thing, you've never felt so alive with anyone as with HIM!

Just a heads up to anyone who may potentially be moving into an affair-risk situation (as opposed to the douchebags deliberately setting out to find someone to cheat on their spouse with behind their back): That is to say, to anyone who doesn't want to be a cheater but finds themselves unexpectedly developing feelings toward someone who isn't their significant other:

1. Yes, you ARE capable of cheating on your spouse, and you put yourself more at risk by thinking that you're above that sort of thing.

2. No, you should NOT talk to the person you may be starting to get feelings for about said feelings, and you should NOT listen to them talk about theirs. They are the absolute worst person possible to talk about it if you don't want to end up in an affair. If you feel you simply have to talk to someone and can't talk to your spouse about it, talk to random strangers online. Do NOT talk to the person you have feelings for.

3. If you want to avoid ending up in an affair, you need to get this person out of your life. Which can sometimes be hard, due to work or all sorts of other situations where you may encounter them. Just remember: you need to weigh the difficulty of the steps to get them out of your life vs. consequences of an affair v. And once again, see point #1.

4. Yes, your feelings for the new person will go away with time not being around or communicating with them.

5. Once the emotional chaos is dulled or gone (NOT while you're still deep in the middle of it), reflect on what it was that led to the situation in the first place. What was the need in your life that wasn't being fulfilled that pulled you in that direction? Work with your significant other to try to get it met. Communicate your needs - and listen to theirs too. And if your significant other ultimately proves unwilling or unable to meet your needs, then it may be time to begin to think about ending the relationship - talk with them to try to do it amicably. But never make decisions like that when you're in the throw of emotions because of Someone New(TM). It will completely colour your views.

Re:Happily married?

[Dutch Gun]

From the article:

Mac ... says he doesn’t regret the affair he had via AshleyMadison; his only regret is not finding a way to keep his home address out of his records on the site.

Apparently, no guilt at all. He's only worried that he might be caught.

Re:Happily married?

[AthanasiusKircher]

The wife is the body. I respect my body, but I occasionally eat a Sundae. At the moment I eat unhealthy foods it is hard to argue that I respect my body 100%, but it would be equally absurd to claim I have no respect for my body.

It may be absurd to claim that you have "no respect" for your wife if you cheat, but it is NOT absurd to claim that you have "no respect" for your MARRIAGE, which is an agreement between you and your wife. And usually pretty high on the list of terms of that agreement for most spouses is no adultery. Some may be okay with it, but that's generally something you negotiate with the spouse's consent. This is not the "fine print" of what marriage means -- it's pretty fundamental to the agreement.

To go back to your analogy, you may not completely disrespect your body by eating some ice cream, but if you made an explicit agreement stated before hundreds of witnesses in a formal ceremony that you would not eat ice cream, then you are completely disrespecting that agreement (and, by extension, you are disrespecting all who took part it in, at least to some extent).

You don't want that agreement? Fine. Don't take a vow to it. Or negotiate out of it. Some people want a diet where they can also eat ice cream. Be honest with your body and say that's the only kind of diet you want, and if your body can't deal, well... no diet for the body at all.

I'm getting tired of this analogy. Point is: this is about a formal, binding agreement. Honest people sign onto agreements that they plan to keep. And if they can't hold up the terms, honest people admit to it and either get out of the agreement or negotiate for something else.

And not only that, but we're not talking about some sort of accidental drunken hook-up here... we're talking about a guy who signs up on a website explicitly devoted to cheating and then deliberately makes a choice to cheat.

It's not like you were just at a party and somebody stuck a scoop of ice cream in your mouth, and you succumbed to accidental temptation. You sat at your computer, deliberately sought out a place to acquire ice cream, checked it out in detail, and then made plans to surreptitiously go eat it. A person who respects his dietary plan and is honest about how he is "happily dieting" does not do such things.

About that

[pushing-robot]

a user who admits to having had an affair after meeting a woman on the site and who is now worried about the fallout, which he said could endanger his happily married life with his wife and kids.

I think you accomplished that all on your own, sir.

P.S. With so much personal info floating around the Internet, what's to stop scammers from creating fake profiles and going after anybody?