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Massachusetts Boarding School Sued Over Wi-Fi Sickness
alphadogg writes: The parents of an anonymous student at the Fay School in Southborough, Mass., allege that the Wi-Fi at the institution is making their child sick, according to a lawsuit filed in U.S. District Court earlier this month (PDF). The child, identified only as "G" in court documents, is said to suffer from electromagnetic hypersensitivity syndrome. The radio waves emitted by the school's Wi-Fi routers cause G serious discomfort and physical harm, according to the suit. "After being continually denied access to the school in order to test their student's classroom, and having their request that all classrooms in which their child is present have the WiFi network replaced with a hard-wired Ethernet denied, the parents sued under the Americans with Disabilities Act."
Chronic stupidity? Overactive placebo gland?
Call Saul
My condition causes me significant discomfort around people who say aggressively stupid things, internalize and repeat strange diagnoses they read on the internet, and causes me to have thoughts of self-harm when listening to security software vendor presentations. I have repeatedly asked my employer to accommodate my needs stemming from Bullshit-intolerance Syndrome (BS), but they all just say, "that's bullshit, we won't tolerate that" to which I say "yes, that's my problem too." Perhaps I also suffer from Jackass Impulsive Recursive Comment (JIRC) disorder, but they don't want to hear about that either. I'm gonna sue.
I think not...(*poof*)
Well, if I stand outside in the hot texas sun for over half an hour, I do develop a bad skin rash that burns, itches and stings for a day or so. Sometimes it's also accompanied by nausea and lethargy. I suppose I have EHS!
Of course doctors don't diagnose me properly, instead they ask me to apply this skin lotion before hand, and warn me if I keep going out without it I may get cancer. I have tried to sue the sun, and have asked it to turn itself down, but it never complies for more than 12 hours a time, frequently less.
Cyberchondria
... is 802.11 G
Of course Wifi only exists near hotspots, which is why I plan to sell the parents behind this lawsuit my own unique brand of Wifi that won't trigger their son's sensitivity. As everyone knows, only Wifi routers put out harmful radiation that can trigger such totally real disorders as electromagnetic hypersensitivity syndrome. Microwaves, on the other hand, contain all their radiation entirely within the steel box using the powers of science.
By putting their Wifi router in the microwave, along with any devices they wish to receive wifi, and turning the microwave on for 12 hours, young G's parents can bake the Wifi right into their devices without any risk of electromagnetic radiation triggering their son's disorder. I like to call it Mi-Fi.
Shouldn't it be called Wi-Fri?
I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!
The child, identified only as "G" in court documents
Well there is the problem. If the child identified himself as "N", there wouldn't be a conflict and the kid would learn faster.
This is why you make a tinfoil hat: to keep the radio waves out of your head. It's simple to do, and as a bonus the voices stop.
Actually, a large dosage of heavy metal solutions administered IV will help block the RF, and is guaranteed to solve the root cause.
"National Security is the chief cause of national insecurity." - Celine's First Law
My superstition is that not having a 13th floor is bad luck, since after all what is proping up the 14th floor? Magic? Though, whatever you do, don't try proving the fact that the 14th floor is the 13th, since this will lead to confusion and mass hysteria, and may even brand you as some sort of heretic.
Jumpstart the tartan drive.
Why would the kid want to live with the people who sent them to boarding school?
Bring in a portable faraday cage and have him sit in it.
Sounds like reasonable accomodation to me, problem solved.
"Thus arose, in the early 20's, a small subculture of spherically encased children known as 'Faraday Hamsters.'
Enabled by a 2017 Supreme Court interpretation of the Americans With Disabilities Act, these 'Faraday Hamsters' could frequently be seen running their electromagnetically impervious cages down school hallways along special troughs--evocative of the famous boulder chase scene in the 20th century classic, Raiders of the Lost Ark."
--Collected Histories of the Twenty-First Century
Nothing posted to
I propose a novel treatment:
Seal pure water into a container and place it into a microwave oven for 1 millisecond (or a microsecond for extreme cases). Sell it as a homopathic treatment for $50/ounce.
I work in a building full of equipment broadcasting on several different bands all day long, not just the few piddly wi-fi routers. It seems that every day I come to work I spend the day completely depressed, but I cheer up again when I go home at night. My only conclusion is that RF causes depression.
Have gnu, will travel.
I once had an HVAC guy tell me it's pretty common for people in that business to install unconnected thermostats in buildings where people complain about the temperature. Then the complaints stop.
It's actually an immune response to 802.11 frames, not microwaves per se. The best way to confirm the diagnosis is to obtain some of the old pre-802.11b era gear, from when the spec still defined an IR physical layer. Then you can completely remove RF from the test environment; but still expose the subject to 802.11 frames.
Alas, finding Spectrix Inc. networking gear is pretty damn tricky these days, so it's a difficult test to perform.
It's the harsh, unnatural, digital modulation that causes the trouble. Good old analog transmitters, carrying Human voices, are naturally in sympathetic harmony with the body's own vital energy; and promote wellness.
Once arrogant technocrats imposed a 'binary' worldview that rejects the wholistic wisdom of the body, the transmissions became intensely disruptive to our health, and corrosive to the spirit.
Isn't it obvious?
Triple blind is when the gov't kills everyone involved in the test.
Sleep your way to a whiter smile...date a dentist!
When I was in preschool, I got a "cold" and had to stay home so I didn't make the other kids sick. That part was explained to me at the time. But they didn't also explain that my runny nose and sore throat were themselves the "cold." So those symptoms went away, and I had no idea that I no longer had a "cold." They asked if I wanted to go back to preschool, I said "no." I mean, I didn't like it for other reasons and back then in the stone age "preschool" was daycare with no education at all, and no concept of appropriate supervision either. So it was no loss. But they just respected my wishes, and it was many years later when they found out the reason I said "no" was that I didn't want to make the other kids get a "cold," whatever that was. It sure sounded bad by the tone of voice adults used when they said I had it.
It is the natural trajectory for making decisions from ignorance.