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Bank's Severance Deal Requires IT Workers To Be Available For Two Years (computerworld.com)

Posted by samzenpus on from the stick-around-for-a-while dept.

dcblogs points out this story at Computerworld about a severance agreement that requires laid-off IT employees to be available to help out for two years. The article reads in part: "SunTrust Banks in Atlanta is laying off about 100 IT workers as it moves work offshore. But this layoff is unusual for what it is asking of the soon-to-be displaced workers: The bank's severance agreement requires terminated employees to remain available for two years to provide help if needed, including in-person assistance, and to do so without compensation. Many of the affected IT employees, who are now training their replacements, have years of experience and provide the highest levels of technical support. The proof of their ability may be in the severance requirement, which gives the bank a way to tap their expertise long after their departure. The bank's severance includes a 'continuing cooperation' clause for a period of two years, where the employee agrees to 'make myself reasonably available' to SunTrust 'regarding matters in which I have been involved in the course of my employment with SunTrust and/or about which I have knowledge as a result of my employment at SunTrust.'"

9 of 602 comments (clear)

  1. memory loss defence? by dudpixel · · Score: 5, Funny

    "I'm sorry, it seems I've forgotten how to fix that. Good luck"

    --
    This seemed like a reasonable sig at the time.
    1. Re:memory loss defence? by kefalonia · · Score: 5, Funny

      Yes, THIS.

      "Sorry, my memory has failed me. What are you going to do? will you fire me? ;-)"

      That clause is so ridiculous, that this kind of response would make even the judge chuckle with content!

    2. Re: memory loss defence? by JWW · · Score: 5, Funny

      Well then I suppose the employees will have to come in and "help" then, it'd be a real pity of the only command they could remember was "drop table".

    3. Re:memory loss defence? by hairyfeet · · Score: 4, Funny

      Am I the only one thinking this would be a great chance for some epic trolling? Show up in some nasty t-shirt that says something like "pussy hunter" smelling like beer and do a "super" job, if you define "super" as "halfassed and wrong".

      Hey they said be available, i couldn't predict that they would call when I had been on a bender and was having issues, could I? ;-)

      --
      ACs don't waste your time replying, your posts are never seen by me.
    4. Re:memory loss defence? by viperidaenz · · Score: 3, Funny

      That's convenient, your H1-B replacement is from Lithuania!

    5. Re:memory loss defence? by pslytely+psycho · · Score: 4, Funny

      Oh, yes, I remember now, we need the CEO to urinate on the servers to cool them, yes, I'm certain that will fix the problem....

      --
      Donald Trump, on a crusade to make Nixon look respectable
    6. Re:memory loss defence? by TheGratefulNet · · Score: 3, Funny

      (ring, ring)

      "hello?"

      "we need you to come in and fix our system."

      "busy now; just reinstall windows."

      "really?"

      (click)

      --

      --
      "It is now safe to switch off your computer."
    7. Re:memory loss defence? by grimmjeeper · · Score: 4, Funny

      (ring, ring) "Hello, laid off IT. Turn it off and turn it back on again." (click)

  2. Re:Wrong answers are still free. by viperidaenz · · Score: 5, Funny

    "Hi, our backup restore failed, and you're the guy who we used to employ to manage it. The H1-B you trained doesn't know shit"
    "Oh right, first thing you need to do is re-format the backup tapes, to make sure there are no bad sectors.."