Slashdot Mirror

← Back to Stories (view on slashdot.org)

German Carpenter's Testicluar Valve Could Mean An On/Off Switch For Sperm

Posted by timothy on from the this-one-goes-to-zero dept.

Press2ToContinue writes: A German carpenter has invented a valve which he claims will revolutionize contraception, by allowing a man to turn the flow of sperm from his testicles on and off at the flick of a switch. It (the switch, of course) is nearly an inch long and weighs less than a tenth of an ounce. It is surgically implanted on the vas deferens, the tube that carries sperm from the testicles, in a half-hour operation, and controlled by a switch beneath the skin of the scrotum.

So far Bimek is the only man who has the switches implanted, one for each testicle. I wonder what other switches we will see implanted into humans in the future? I think I'd like a valve for adrenaline control.

12 of 287 comments (clear)

  1. Those crazy Germans by xxxJonBoyxxx · · Score: 5, Funny

    >> A German carpenter has invented a valve that gets implanted in the most delicate part of your body via a surgical operation

    Seems about right to me.

    1. Re:Those crazy Germans by Locke2005 · · Score: 4, Funny

      You'd prefer a Jewish carpenter? (I believe that's called the "rhythm method" of birth control.)

      --
      I've abandoned my search for truth; now I'm just looking for some useful delusions.
  2. Men can control their stuff with a switch by ClickOnThis · · Score: 4, Funny

    For women, it's more complicated.

    --
    If it weren't for deadlines, nothing would be late.
    1. Re:Men can control their stuff with a switch by ClickOnThis · · Score: 4, Funny

      Otherwise it's just Schoedinger's nuts. ;-)

      LOL!

      Or maybe ... Heisenballs?

      --
      If it weren't for deadlines, nothing would be late.
  3. Good idea? by NMBob · · Score: 5, Funny

    Control it from your iPhone and it posts the setting of the switch to your Facebook page. :)

    1. Re:Good idea? by rduncan10 · · Score: 5, Funny

      iBalls

  4. Deja Vu by I_Wrote_This · · Score: 5, Funny

    I remember a report about this (or, more likely, something similar) many years (20+) ago. The Brits on the team called it the Stop Cock.

  5. Re:There's still a delay by swb · · Score: 4, Funny

    20 loads? Why don't they just say about 3 days worth.

  6. Re:There's still a delay by JudgeFurious · · Score: 5, Funny

    Because some of us aren't hoarding it like that.

    --
    Appended to the end of comments you post. 120 chars.
  7. Oops, valve partially open by Rogue974 · · Score: 4, Funny

    I work at a chemical manufacturing site. Do you have any idea how many millions of pounds of material are lost each year do to a manual valve that was not fully shut.

    I am sorry babby, I guess when I got hit in the groin last week playing basketball, it must have opened the valve!

    Or,

    I closed it, I guess it didn't close all of the way!

    Yeah, not so sure this is a good idea!

  8. Re:It's made of Maple and stained golden oak by Chris+Mattern · · Score: 4, Funny

    Where do you get "steal wool" from?

    Contraband sheep.

  9. Re:Screw that (pun intended). by tehcyder · · Score: 5, Funny

    it's been a while since I performed a vasectomy

    I hope to God that You Are A Doctor.

    --
    To have a right to do a thing is not at all the same as to be right in doing it