Slashdot Mirror
Slashdot Asks: What Are Some Insults No Developer Wants To Hear? (infoworld.com)
snydeq writes: Flame wars in the bug tracker might be exactly the right (harsh) feedback your code needs, writes Peter Wayner in his run-down of the insults no programmer wants to hear about their code or coding skills. "The technology world is a bit different than the pretty, coiffed world of suits and salesdroids where everyone is polite, even when they hate your guts and think you're an idiot. Suit-clad managers may smile and hide their real message by the way they say you're doing "great, real great pal," but programmers often speak their minds, and when that mind has something unpleasant to say, look-out, feelings." Instead of posting this story in a click-bait fashion as presented from InfoWorld, we thought we'd ask the developers of Slashdot: What are some insults no developer wants to hear? Some of the classic insults include: N00b, /dev/null, Eye Candy, Fanboi, and [Nothing]. Are there any insults you are familiar with that aren't mentioned in the list?
It compiled cleanly, so he shipped it.
John
"Yes but as I'm not a moron I never thought of the user story from your perspective..."
systemd
the recursive function computing her mass causes a stack overflow.
Wow this is microsoft quality!
Do not look at laser with remaining good eye.
I'm a strong advocate of constructive code reviews that provide useful feedback, while leaving the egos and personal stuff out. It's important for everyone to participate, to both give and receive feedback. First, you help your team improve your product. Second, you learn about the new sections of code; how the new functionality was implemented. That's important on a large product.
And then there's the one that many of the old guys overlook: nobody knows it all, so everyone can learn from anyone, including the new kid on the team. We can all see how technology and computers have evolved dramatically over the decades; it's a mistake to believe that software design and engineering hasn't been simultaneously evolving for the better.
John
In the 15 years of my professional career, there's only been one day when I didn't want to come to work.
That was the day after the IT department accused me of intentionally crashing their network, and my Director didn't back me up.
That loss of confidence in my integrity was far worse than any spoken word.
What kind of frat-house development shop are you running? These are the people who are going to help make you successful, not some new pledges to haze. Grow. The. Fuck. Up.
This code is so poorly documented that Donald Trump wants to send it back to Mexico!
"You code like a UX designer"
Those are fighting words. :)
I've fallen off your lawn, and I can't get up.
Sorry, but so far, almost every story posted by BeauHD has been completely irrelevant. Perhaps SD is better than HD? Either way, all his posted stories don't belong on this site. They're all click bait.
"Freedom in the USA is not the ability to do what you want. It is the ability to stop others from doing what THEY want"
From a sr. developer delivered directly to the face of another developer who had been at the company a few years.
To reduce crime, make fewer things against the law.
Something that a lot of developers seem to take pride in, but which is really at the root of unprofessionalism is
Wow, your code is so complex I can't understand it.
politicians are like babies' nappies: they should both be changed regularly and for the same reasons
"Programmers who hurl insults at each other like to think it's because they're honest, no-nonsense efficiency machines that get things done. The reality is that they never bothered to learn how to interact effectively with other human beings, and that deficiency is typically far more detrimental to their professional lives than they realize."
Obliteracy: Words with explosions
People have very long memories, especially in the career department when their house, and food for their family is on the line. Wisecracking about devs in general in IT is one thing. Insulting people to their face or their manager's face is not exactly a very wise career move.
Plus, devs have heard it all. They have heard they can be replaced by offshore dev houses, H-1Bs, monkeys, or almost anything. They are not going to perform any better when someone continues to compare them with inanimate objects or people in a persistent vegetative state.
To boot, there may be a good chance that the college intern or H-1B fresh off the boat that is the brunt of insults this week may be one's manager the the next week after a corporate reorg or a buyout.
Insults are the first refuge of the insecure. I'm not talking Torvalds-style insults of the code, I'm talking about when they insult you.
Bad code deserves insults, although not all insulted code is bad, since people will insult good code as an indirect insult of the coder, which is completely different.
Flaming people in order to build oneself up by putting other people down is at least as old as the Internet, but it's not conducive to better coding - it's more likely to drive away people who could potentially be valuable contributors.
Because of that, there is at least one online forum (coderanch.com) whose primary purpose is to allow people to ask stupid questions with the assurance that they won't be flamed.
One should be grateful for one's mother's sexual habits.
(-1: Post disagrees with my already-settled worldview) is not a valid mod option.
Now see here, you young whipper snapper I don't know who you think you're deali$
I don't care one bit for your condescending, flippant attitude about line wrapp$
And while I was stapling punch cards to vacuum tubes in the golden age of compu$
I single-handedly rewrote our nuclear missile guidance systems on an 80x24 term$
And the whole time I was with Tim Leary ripped in half on sunshine acid and amy$
Look I'm sorry for what I said earlier about your mother, I just get cranky abo$
Constantly trampling my prize zinnias! And my fescue isn't going to reseed itse$
Jesus they're back, I have to go chase them off while waving a rake in the air.
Nothing posted to
You don't have to insult them. Just do their job for them and they'll get the point.
Why would that be? Because you're a diva, you think you're the best coder ever and don't have anything to learn anymore? It might hurt your ego?
Grow a pair and accept constructive criticism. I'd take harsh but constructive feedback from Linus anyday, he's one of the most succesful coders on Earth right now. Why wouldn't you want to get some input from him?
Dude, you kidding? I'd *kill* to get some of his time to go over the stuff I write!
Why? Because I'd frickin' *learn* from it, that's why...
Seriously - never fear honest criticism from people who are way better at it than you are.
Quo usque tandem abutere, Nimbus, patientia nostra?