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The UK's Largest Sperm Bank Is Now An App (technologyreview.com)

Posted by BeauHD on from the on-demand dept.

Sperm bank? There's an app for that. The largest sperm bank in the United Kingdom -- the London Sperm Bank -- has released an official app that aims to "modernize the process of hooking prospective parents up with the biological material they need to make it happen," according to MIT Technology Review: The app is essentially just a mobile version of the filtered search function the London Sperm Bank offers on its website. But in doing something as simple as bringing its desktop services to mobile devices, the bank is making a play to further normalize reproductive technologies. The London Sperm Bank boasts that users will receive push notifications as soon as new donors are available, which could help speed things up for hopeful parents looking for a match. The road to conception can take years for people using reproductive technologies, so expediting any part of the process would be a welcome time-saver. But the bank has over 10,000 vials of sperm, so searching, even using filters, could still be a lengthy process. To combat this, the app also offers a wish list function that lets more focused users predetermine what they're looking for in a donor, and receive a notification when their criteria are met. The way the service works on mobile has been compared to Tinder, but there's actually no swiping involved. Its wish list function means it's more akin to apps like Anthology, which job seekers use to find their next career move. The report notes that, while there are other mobile sperm bank apps out there, the London Sperm Bank is the only one with several medical associations and the U.K. government's Human Fertilization and Embryology Authority on board. Also, the app is free to download, but the cost of ordering sperm is about $1,200 per order, which is the same as if you order through the London Sperm Bank catalogue.

9 of 65 comments (clear)

  1. What w@nker thought this was a good idea?? by Viol8 · · Score: 3, Funny

    I mean, cum on!

    1. Re:What w@nker thought this was a good idea?? by AmiMoJo · · Score: 2

      I'm surprised there isn't a kinda of "Uber for sperm donation", bypassing the sperm bank and allowing people to connect peer-to-peer.

      In the UK once the child turns 18 they can get the donor's details. In other words, 18 years later you might be tracked down by one of your offspring. A lot of men don't want that.

      Some people don't want to go through the process of being vetted to receive donations either.

      The law states that you can give your sperm to anyone you like, as long as you don't profit from it. You can charge expenses, that's it. Some men do just that, meeting potential recipients online. Donation can be via masturbation or sex.

      --
      const int one = 65536; (Silvermoon, Texture.cs)
      SJW, n: "Someone I don't like, and by the way I'm a fuckwit" - AC
    2. Re:What w@nker thought this was a good idea?? by Applehu+Akbar · · Score: 2

      I'm surprised there isn't a kinda of "Uber for sperm donation", bypassing the sperm bank and allowing people to connect peer-to-peer.

      We call that Tinder.

    3. Re:What w@nker thought this was a good idea?? by Ol+Olsoc · · Score: 2

      They could make money providing vetting services. Provide medical checks for donors, and maybe STD checks for recipients if they plan to use the direct deposit method.

      I think the legal grounds are a little murky. At least here in America, a sperm donor can be required to pay child support http://wthitv.com/2015/09/05/k...

      And of course, since we sue the deepest pockets, the UberSplooge company would likely get somehow drawn into the donnybrook.

      Child support can last past the age of majority as well, if the offspring goes to University. So while not all that likely, that donation could cost you plenty.

      As well, n such a crowded world, its hard for at least me to justify such things, so if a person wants a child that badly, adopt.

      Public service announcement: Its important to remember to use a condom folks - that's how we lost Freddy Mercury, and that's how we got Justin Bieber!

      --
      The shepherds did so well protecting the flock that the sheep no longer believed that wolves existed.
    4. Re:What w@nker thought this was a good idea?? by AmiMoJo · · Score: 2

      The UK is different, the donor has no legal obligations or right to access to the child.

      --
      const int one = 65536; (Silvermoon, Texture.cs)
      SJW, n: "Someone I don't like, and by the way I'm a fuckwit" - AC
  2. Huh by Rei · · Score: 3, Funny

    If they're having trouble finding donors, I suggest they try Hoxton, Brighton, the House of Commons, and the BBC media city in Salford; there's plenty of wankers there to choose from.

    --
    Everybody point at the libertarian and laugh.
  3. Jack Off? by tinkerton · · Score: 2

    I read that Apple has already bettered that. Instead of an app they provided a hardware solution on their iphone.

  4. Re:This is bullshit. by drinkypoo · · Score: 2

    I realize that 'apps' are the future and all; but "a sperm bank is now an app" is pure nonsense.

    Yep. Unless my phone can sequence my DNA, upload the results "to the cloud" and then someone else can download them on their phone and print a sperm, the sperm bank is not an app. I don't use the sperm bank by spooging on my screen, so the sperm bank is not an app.

    Why is this even a story?

    Slow editor day.

    --
    "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
  5. Not that easy by ebvwfbw · · Score: 2

    My uncle went in to donate. He came back out and told the lady - " I tried with my right hand, I tried with my left hand..I just couldn't get the lid off the jar."