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Japan To End Tourists' Toilet Trouble With Standardised Buttons (theguardian.com)

The Japan Sanitary Equipment Industry Association, a consortium of companies producing plumbing products has agreed to unify the iconography used on the often baffling control panels for Japanese toilets. From a report on The Guardian: Navigating the array of buttons on Japan's high-tech toilets can be a disconcerting experience for the uninitiated, who, expecting to hear a familiar flushing sound, are instead subjected to a sudden, and unwanted, cleansing of the nether regions. As Japan prepares for an influx of overseas visitors during the 2019 rugby World Cup and the Tokyo Olympics the following year, the country's sanitation industry has agreed to standardize pictograms on toilets so users know for certain if they are about to receive a blast of warm air or a jet of water. Nine manufacturers belonging to the Japan sanitary equipment industry association will soon start using the same eight symbols to explain the buttons found on their state-of-the-art WCs. At a launch event this week, the firms said they had agreed to simplify the pictography in response to complaints from tourists that they are confused by symbols that differ depending on the make of toilet. In a survey of 600 foreign visitors, a quarter said they could not understand some of the symbols that appear on the toilet buttons.

187 comments

  1. That Quarter by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 1

    > a quarter said they could not understand some of the symbols that appear on the toilet buttons.

    Those are the quarter of the population that need to be sent on the B-ARK.

    --
    I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    1. Re:That Quarter by cayenne8 · · Score: 1
      Ok, I've never been to Japan, but seriously, how complex is it for a toilet?

      You sit, you shit, you wipe, stand and flush.....?

      --
      Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.........
    2. Re:That Quarter by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      ..., bidet, mist, warm air, perfume, music, massage...

    3. Re:That Quarter by djinn6 · · Score: 1

      This. Just ignore every other button except the "flush", and do your shit like you would in any other country. Every Japanese bathroom I went to had toilet paper.

      And if you can't figure out which one is flush, just leave it. It sucks for the next guy, but you're not being an asshole on purpose.

    4. Re:That Quarter by Calydor · · Score: 3, Insightful

      If the tourists can't figure out which one is flush, that's a GREAT reason to standardize the pictograms!

      --
      -=This sig has nothing to do with my comment. Move along now=-
    5. Re:That Quarter by djinn6 · · Score: 3, Informative

      Every toilet that I've seen in Japan had the regular metal button or lever on the water bowl for the flush. The pictograms are for the advanced functions.

    6. Re:That Quarter by JaredOfEuropa · · Score: 1

      The pictograms are for the advanced functions.

      Tentacles? One would hope...

      --
      If construction was anything like programming, an incorrectly fitted lock would bring down the entire building...
    7. Re:That Quarter by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      You sit, you shit, you wipe, stand and flush.....?

      ...and you've clearly never been to Japan. Seriously, if you can find a convenient tree/stair-well/corner-of-lane it's usually the easier option.

    8. Re:That Quarter by ShanghaiBill · · Score: 1

      Every toilet that I've seen in Japan had the regular metal button or lever on the water bowl for the flush.

      You must not have been there long. I have seen many that are much more complicated than that. Most don't even have a single "flush" button/lever, but two. One for a big (poop) flush, and one for a smaller (urine only) flush.

      As long as I we critiquing Japanese restrooms, can we gripe about the sinks too? All around the world, sinks have the hot water on the left, and the cold on the right ... except Japan, where they are connected randomly, and often unlabeled. For an otherwise organized and efficient society, how can they screw up something so simple?

    9. Re: That Quarter by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      One time there was a man flying on a luxury Japanese airliner. Walking towards the toilet cubicles he notices that all the ones for the men are occupied. Not wishing to cause him inconvenience the stewardess informs him that he can use one of the women's cubicles but that he must not press any of the buttons. Well he sees the luxury seat and sits down he looks at the control panel, but doesn't understand any of the pictures but just presses the buttons anyway. One button gives a back massage, another raises and lowers the seat. One sprays perfume. Another blows warm air. When he presses the last button, he feels a blinding pain and passes out. He wakes up in a hospital bed bandaged up. The nurse walks up to him and asks "You pressed the buttons, yes?". The man nods sheepishly and then the nurse informs him "You have clean clothes in the drawers, toiletries in the bathroom, and your penis is under the pullow".

    10. Re: That Quarter by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I've been in many hotel bathrooms. Every shower control system is completely different. Sometimes you need to turn a couple of dials, another requires a valve lever to be pulled. Some require that a metal tap is pulled out and twisted. Others just have a handle that is turned.

    11. Re:That Quarter by AK+Marc · · Score: 1

      https://upload.wikimedia.org/w... Someone else posted a link to a toilet control panel. Seems pretty complicated, even with pictures.

    12. Re:That Quarter by AthanasiusKircher · · Score: 1

      And if you can't figure out which one is flush, just leave it. It sucks for the next guy, but you're not being an asshole on purpose.

      Truer words were never spoken.

    13. Re:That Quarter by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 2

      Ok, I've never been to Japan, but seriously, how complex is it for a toilet?

      You sit, you shit, you wipe, stand and flush.....?

      Nope. Sit, shit, flush, wash, dry.

      If you get a western room in a hotel they'll provide toilet paper but the cleaning staff will know you have an unwashed sphincter and while they will be outwardly polite to you, they will internally hate you and your dirty dirt hole.

      The food in Japan is awesome though.

      --
      I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    14. Re:That Quarter by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 1

      Flush is in the usual place.

      --
      I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    15. Re:That Quarter by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 1

      It's not as big a waste as flushing all that toilet paper down the bog, like in the USA.

      --
      I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    16. Re:That Quarter by Aighearach · · Score: 1

      Here in the US all sinks have labeled handles, and they might be backwards because we have a lot of Homers and a blue collar work culture of just pointing the new guy at a task and saying, "figure it out." Even chances the labels are wrong, or the hot and cold are really swapped.

      If you stay in the cattle sections you only get one temperature anyways so no problem.

    17. Re:That Quarter by dbIII · · Score: 2

      All around the world, sinks have the hot water on the left, and the cold on the right

      I used to live in a town with artesian water - stuff from very deep underground that comes up hot and under pressure. The water pipes in town were on the surface or close to it in a lot of places.
      In the height of summer the "cold" tap would range from cup of tea temperature to scalding if you let it run long enough.
      In my house the "hot" tap was fed from a tank at the back of the stove. In summer it was too hot to use the stove, so the town water would sit in the tank and cool down to room temperature.
      Thus the "cold" was burning hot (sometimes 70C or more, the bore the water came from a few blocks away was at around 90C) and the "hot" was cold.

      In winter the "cold" water would actually be cold from those shallow pipes unless you ran it for a long time, while the "hot" was actually heated by the stove and was hot.

      So of course this really confused infrequent visitors.

    18. Re: That Quarter by arglebargle_xiv · · Score: 2

      You find this a lot more in the US than elsewhere, it's an artefact of the use of bath + shower vs. a standalone shower, which is more common outside the US. What you describe is very true though, every hotel you go to presents a new puzzle in how to make water come out of the shower head. Sometimes it's relatively easy (turn or pull a locking knob on the bath faucet, typically), other times I've come close to calling the front desk to report a faulty shower until I finally figured it out (turn the decorative moulding around the front of the faucet about 45 degrees, then pull it down to lock it into place). The problem with the latter is that a well-disguised switchover mechanism is indistinguishable from a fixture that looks like it might do the job if you just push/pull/twist it a bit harder.

  2. Eight function toilet? by Marxist+Hacker+42 · · Score: 1

    I can think of three, maybe four, but beyond light flush, heavy flush, bidet, and drier, what are the other four functions?

    --
    SJW: a person who perceives an injustice, and while correcting it, commits a greater injustice.
    1. Re:Eight function toilet? by BarbaraHudson · · Score: 2

      You mean nobody explained to you the importance of men not pushing the ATR button?"

      --
      "Transparent" is a shit show that trades on every stereotype going. A man in drag is NOT a transsexual.
    2. Re:Eight function toilet? by sabri · · Score: 5, Insightful

      I can think of three, maybe four, but beyond light flush, heavy flush, bidet, and drier, what are the other four functions?

      After my first trip to Japan, I bought one of those superseats. Mine features a heated seat with different settings, front bidet for the ladies, back bidet for us all, settings for water temperature. And I didn't even buy the iffy-spiffy one.

      Home Depot sells them. Once you've used them, you'll wonder why we use paper. Think about it: if you get poop on your hand, would you just wipe it or properly clean it with soap and water? Nevermind, I know the answer. So why do you settle for just wiping down there?

      --
      I'm not a complete idiot... Some parts are missing.
    3. Re:Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      cry, probe, puke, kamehameha

    4. Re:Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Marge: "I know what the other 11 forks are for, but I don't know what to do with this one."
      Homer: "Why Marge I believe you're supposed to scratch your ass with it."

      capcha: recast

    5. Re:Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I can think of three, maybe four, but beyond light flush, heavy flush, bidet, and drier, what are the other four functions?

      Wash - rear

      Wash - female

      Water temp controls (+ -)

      Water pressure controls(+ -)

      Air dry

      Air sanitize

      Think that makes eight and those are pretty standard on higher end models. Japanese bidets seats are awesome! Flushing doesn't even come into it.

    6. Re:Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      2 bidets and 2 driers. One for backside and one for womens frontside. 2 button to lift and lower lid, light flush, heavy flush and an emergency stop in case you hit the wrong button.

    7. Re:Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I can think of three, maybe four, but beyond light flush, heavy flush, bidet, and drier, what are the other four functions?

      The eight new symbols show users how to flush (large and small), open and close the lid, activate the front and back cleanse and drying functions, and trigger the off switch.

    8. Re:Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      So why do you settle for just wiping down there?

      Because we don't use our ass to pick up things?

    9. Re:Eight function toilet? by FatdogHaiku · · Score: 5, Funny

      5) morph into land, sea, or air vehicle
      6) join with four other vehicles to create a larger machine
      7) join your larger machine to two others the create the Might Flushtron
      8) intimate function to assure very satisfactory toilet experience...
      please remain seated

      --
      You have the right to remain sentient. If you give up the right to remain sentient, you will be elected to public office
    10. Re:Eight function toilet? by Tablizer · · Score: 2

      Japan turned toilets into rocket science. Let's hope they don't turn rockets into toilet science.

    11. Re:Eight function toilet? by __aaclcg7560 · · Score: 4, Funny

      Google has these fancy toilets when I worked IT help desk ten years ago. On several occasions I had the double shock of my balls touching the ice cold water in the bowl and my ass catching on fire on the toilet seat at the same time.

    12. Re:Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Does your bidet use soap or does it just add water to the problem?

    13. Re:Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It's japan so there's probably at least 3 of:
      transform into a giant robot
      anti-underwear-thief laser
      portal to ill defined bathroom themed shadow world
      challenge nearby toilets to a duel
      activate tentacles
      deactivate tentacles
      self destruct

      Just make sure that you verify the presence of "deactivate tentacles" before trying "activate tentacles" not all models have both.

    14. Re:Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      So why do you settle for just wiping down there?

      Because we don't use our ass to pick up things?

      Because lazy, stupid Amerikans like to smell faintly of shit all day?

    15. Re:Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      you mean noone showed you how to use the seashells?

    16. Re:Eight function toilet? by wonkey_monkey · · Score: 4, Insightful

      So why do you settle for just wiping down there?

      Because I don't use my butt for typing, shaking hands, conveying food to my mouth, scratching...

      --
      systemd is Roko's Basilisk.
    17. Re:Eight function toilet? by Gilgaron · · Score: 1

      Adding more water is just making it easier for the bacteria to grow... washing your hands without soap, similarly, just increases your microbial load.

    18. Re: Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Sounds like that Japanese tech is functioning as designed, if the anime I've seen is any indication.

    19. Re:Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Unless your bidet has a "scrub with soap" button I fail to see how a simple jet of water is going to achieve much.

    20. Re:Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      How does it clean with just water?
      I still use toilet paper for the "big mess", but I use moist wipes for "going deep" and I find that gives both a good clean and no irritation. With just a water sprout I would feel (and probably be) still dirty.

    21. Re:Eight function toilet? by friedmud · · Score: 2

      I personally don't like the idea of any water coming up from the _toilet_ onto me. How clean are the spray nozzles? How well maintained is the tubing running to the spray nozzles?

      No: I'll settle for wiping off what I can... and doing my own proper cleaning that evening in the shower with soap.

    22. Re:Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Because you can scrape & rough-wipe more effectively than a gush of water. Only a sand blaster could be more effective at hands-off cleaning. You won't get your hands dirty whilst using paper if you ball it up rather than fold it flat like you do.

    23. Re:Eight function toilet? by avandesande · · Score: 1

      I've trained myself to go in the morning before showering. I haven't used a public toilet (at least sitting) for years.

      --
      love is just extroverted narcissism
    24. Re: Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      It's just a matter of nozzle shape, water pressure and attack angle

    25. Re:Eight function toilet? by AthanasiusKircher · · Score: 1

      How does it clean with just water?

      I think most people have no clue of the amount of water pressure available on most of these toilets. Somebody posted a link to a photo down thread, but this isn't your typical European bidet with the water pressure that sort of "oozes" out like a gentle faucet or something. Most of the Japanese toilets can start at that low level of pressure, but you can generally turn them up so high you could basically give yourself an enema with one.

    26. Re:Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Mom, I told you to quit posting on Slashdot!

    27. Re: Eight function toilet? by rworne · · Score: 1

      The nozzle is just under the seat, not in the lower part of the bowl. Most modern Japanese toilets have the nozzle on a retractable wand that is always out of the "drop zone" and emerges only when commanded to do so with the controls.

      So no, you cannot pee or crap on them* and they keep pretty clean on their own. But there is also a button that will extend it for a wipe down.

      *If you push the button while dropping a load, all bets are off. If you push it while peeing, it'll piss back at you, but the modern Toto units won't deploy if there's no one on the seat.

      --
      I tried every decent and legal way I could think of to resolve the issue w/the business before I rented the chicken suit
    28. Re:Eight function toilet? by Obfuscant · · Score: 1

      How well maintained is the tubing running to the spray nozzles?

      As well maintained as the tubing running to the faucets that you rinse your toothbrush with.

    29. Re:Eight function toilet? by AK+Marc · · Score: 1

      soap and water without agitation won't clean, and is messy (water spraying around). Wiping minimizes mess, and the US is more keen on daily showers, where you clean that area more. Bidets are more common in places where daily showers aren't common.

    30. Re: Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      "We extrapolated the design based on the information provided by your broadcasts".

    31. Re:Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      ... poop on your hand, would you just wipe it ...

      There are parts of the world where toilet procedure is still pre-historic; shit on the ground, clean your hole with your fingers, wash your fingers. It's surprising that so many rituals in modern life, such as brushing your teeth, or isolating human waste, are only a few hundred years old.

    32. Re: Eight function toilet? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Bigot.

    33. Re:Eight function toilet? by Aighearach · · Score: 1

      Japan turned toilets into rocket science. Let's hope they don't turn rockets into toilet science.

      Hey now, toilet science is half the space program!

    34. Re:Eight function toilet? by PrimaryConsult · · Score: 1

      The Japanese take daily baths/showers as well (and also a ritual where you wash before entering a public bath or hot spring), so I think there's more to it than shower culture.

      As for "without agitation" the force these things use is insane - obligatory car analogy: Compare to washing your car. If you use a garden hose you need a sponge and soap. But, after a major rainstorm, every car on the block glistens after experiencing nothing but the sheer force of water. This is a rainstorm directed squarely onto your bunghole. And there is TP available, so you have both methods of cleaning at your "disposal" for maximum effectiveness (truthfully you should use the TP anyway just to dry off faster).

    35. Re:Eight function toilet? by AmiMoJo · · Score: 3, Funny

      "Because I don't use my butt for typing, shaking hands, conveying food to my mouth, scratching..."

      Apparently I'm doing it wrong.

      --
      const int one = 65536; (Silvermoon, Texture.cs)
      SJW, n: "Someone I don't like, and by the way I'm a fuckwit" - AC
    36. Re:Eight function toilet? by wonkey_monkey · · Score: 1

      Apparently I'm doing it wrong.

      I dread to think how long it took you to post this comment. Kudos on not getting thrown out of the library before you did it, though.

      --
      systemd is Roko's Basilisk.
    37. Re:Eight function toilet? by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 1

      So why do you settle for just wiping down there?

      Because I don't use my butt for typing, shaking hands, conveying food to my mouth, scratching...

      Unless you are scratching your butt, where is it an active participant in the scratcher-scratchee interaction.

      --
      I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    38. Re:Eight function toilet? by b783719 · · Score: 1

      Well, so far using paper seems to be better than just using hands with Soap and Water...

    39. Re:Eight function toilet? by hambone142 · · Score: 1

      You haven't eaten at my company's cafeteria.

    40. Re:Eight function toilet? by AmiMoJo · · Score: 1

      The water comes from the mains directly, not the toilet tank. It's basically the same as what comes out of the tap. It's usually heated by a little coil just before being sprayed out. The nozzle is self cleaning, with a combination of self-washing and UV sterilisation.

      In the last few years they have started adding tanks for detergent as well. Most of it is used to clean the bowl after every flush, but I think some is used on the nozzle too if I recall.

      --
      const int one = 65536; (Silvermoon, Texture.cs)
      SJW, n: "Someone I don't like, and by the way I'm a fuckwit" - AC
    41. Re:Eight function toilet? by Coren22 · · Score: 1

      I think if your mom has balls, you might have more concerns than that she is posting on Slashdot.

      --
      APK likes to ask for responses to the same things over and over. Maybe he just likes the responses?
  3. Because people are F*cking stupid by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    In a survey of 600 foreign visitors, a quarter said they could not understand some of the symbols that appear on the toilet buttons.

    The water spray looks like a sprinkler. The air dryer looks like wind or sometimes bacon. If there are no pictures, it's not too hard to figure out through trial and error. And how hard is it to learn a little bit about the country you'll be visiting? Jesus, you people make me sick.

    1. Re:Because people are F*cking stupid by Oswald+McWeany · · Score: 1

      it's not too hard to figure out through trial and error.

      That could be dangerous as a man if you press the tampon removal button.

      --
      "That's the way to do it" - Punch
  4. Alternate implementation by jmcwork · · Score: 5, Funny

    Replace the buttons with 3 sea shells.

    1. Re:Alternate implementation by Yvan256 · · Score: 2

      I don't know anything about seashells but I knitted a really nice sweater yesterday.

    2. Re:Alternate implementation by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Three seashells - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gdnuOa7tDco

    3. Re:Alternate implementation by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      You obviously missed the "not knowing about seashells and knitting a sweater" reference.

  5. When in doubt... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    push buttons!

  6. Men, don't press the button marked "ATR" by fiannaFailMan · · Score: 1

    It's an Automatic Tampon Remover.

    --
    Drill baby drill - on Mars
    1. Re:Men, don't press the button marked "ATR" by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Why would a Japanese toilet have markings in Latin characters? Besides that, that wasn't funny.

    2. Re:Men, don't press the button marked "ATR" by Tablizer · · Score: 1

      Oh, but it feels soooo good

    3. Re:Men, don't press the button marked "ATR" by Falos · · Score: 1

      You're right, it was dull, predictable, expected, common concepts you see frequently when everyone knows that humor is built on juxtaposition, shock, novelty, by prompting a unexpected and foreign conception in the mind, ideally disruptive.

      Or maybe this is all just my opinion and I shouldn't state this stuff like it's fact, right?

    4. Re:Men, don't press the button marked "ATR" by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      You mean romaji?

    5. Re:Men, don't press the button marked "ATR" by painandgreed · · Score: 1

      Why would a Japanese toilet have markings in Latin characters? Besides that, that wasn't funny.

      Have you seen any Japanese magazines? Latin characters, called romaji, are just 37 more characters to be added to their written symbols already numbering thousands to be used whenever it is more appropriate.

    6. Re:Men, don't press the button marked "ATR" by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      That explains the "TMI" button

  7. More Space Please by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 2

    I can think of three, maybe four, but beyond light flush, heavy flush, bidet, and drier, what are the other four functions?

    After my first trip to Japan, I bought one of those superseats. Mine features a heated seat with different settings, front bidet for the ladies, back bidet for us all, settings for water temperature. And I didn't even buy the iffy-spiffy one.

    Home Depot sells them. Once you've used them, you'll wonder why we use paper. Think about it: if you get poop on your hand, would you just wipe it or properly clean it with soap and water? Nevermind, I know the answer. So why do you settle for just wiping down there?

    In the US there is more space. Plenty of space for a bidet. Incorporating the bidet function into the toilet seat is just a space saving method that is appropriate for the tiny bathrooms in Japan.

    --
    I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    1. Re:More Space Please by myNameIsNotImportant · · Score: 1

      Concerns about space would explain the absences/prevalence of standalone vs toilet-seat bidets. It doesn't explain the lack of bidets.

    2. Re:More Space Please by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I'd bet that the vast majority of bathrooms in existing residences in the US don't have a suitable space for a bidet (normally put against a wall) and that most don't even have the square footage in the bathroom to accommodate one without eliminating another feature if the bathroom were completely remodeled.

      And, even if there was a suitable space, putting in the plumbing (esp. waste line) could be quite expensive and disruptive. Running an additional electrical outlet is much cheaper.

    3. Re: More Space Please by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Bidet... I thought it was just a badly oriented urinal...

    4. Re:More Space Please by wyHunter · · Score: 1

      Some of us in the USA do not have bathrooms the size of football fields, either.

    5. Re: More Space Please by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 2

      Don't knock it until you've got to try washing your arse instead of wiping it.

      A) Save money not buying toilet paper
      B) No itchy arse due to inadequate wiping
      C) Unnerve your guests by having them try to work out what to do when there's no paper
      D) ???
      E) Profit!
       

      --
      I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    6. Re:More Space Please by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 1

      I'd bet that the vast majority of bathrooms in existing residences in the US don't have a suitable space for a bidet (normally put against a wall) and that most don't even have the square footage in the bathroom to accommodate one without eliminating another feature if the bathroom were completely remodeled.

      And, even if there was a suitable space, putting in the plumbing (esp. waste line) could be quite expensive and disruptive. Running an additional electrical outlet is much cheaper.

      We are going to have one installed when we remodel the bathroom. The useless water jet bath thing that came with the house is going away, so there will be plenty of space to have a bidet, more storage and a shower that isn't horrible.

      Staying in Europe for a few weeks converted me to bidets.

      --
      I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    7. Re:More Space Please by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 1

      Then as of tomorrow, those people will not be true 'muricans.

      --
      I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    8. Re:More Space Please by AK+Marc · · Score: 1

      Every US bathroom in houses I've lived in had space for a bidet next to the toilet (some would require shifting the toilet, others not). That may not be representative of all, but in the western US, outside CA (where tiny town houses aren't the norm), it seems that space isn't at such a premium.

    9. Re:More Space Please by wyHunter · · Score: 1

      Actually we ARE - it's the weirdos who have 3000 square foot bathrooms that are really from another planet.

    10. Re:More Space Please by JohnFen · · Score: 1

      I live in the western US outside of California, and the majority of private home bathrooms I've seen have not had sufficient space for something like this. Most of the bathrooms I've seen that could accommodate such a thing without a major remodel have been in expensive houses, not ones that ordinary people live in.

    11. Re:More Space Please by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 1

      I lived in a 2500 square foot house with about 1500 devoted to a huge living room and all the rest of the rooms squished around the edges. We don't live there any more.

      --
      I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    12. Re:More Space Please by AmiMoJo · · Score: 3, Interesting

      Even with unlimited space it makes sense. No need to get up, pants around your ankles, and shuffle over to the bidet. When you are finished washing and the drier has done most of the work, you will probably want toilet paper unless you have a butt towel, and the toilet is the ideal place to dispose of it.

      Also you don't need a second heated seat for the separate bidet, and it's one less thing to clean.

      Oh yes, Japanese toilets are self cleaning.

      --
      const int one = 65536; (Silvermoon, Texture.cs)
      SJW, n: "Someone I don't like, and by the way I'm a fuckwit" - AC
    13. Re:More Space Please by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 1

      Even with unlimited space it makes sense. No need to get up, pants around your ankles, and shuffle over to the bidet. When you are finished washing and the drier has done most of the work, you will probably want toilet paper unless you have a butt towel, and the toilet is the ideal place to dispose of it.

      Also you don't need a second heated seat for the separate bidet, and it's one less thing to clean.

      Oh yes, Japanese toilets are self cleaning.

      But with a separate toilet you can rest your latte on the toilet while you use the bidet.

      West coast, best coast!

      --
      I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    14. Re:More Space Please by Cinnamon+Beige · · Score: 1

      In the US there is more space. Plenty of space for a bidet. Incorporating the bidet function into the toilet seat is just a space saving method that is appropriate for the tiny bathrooms in Japan.

      That depends. If you're dealing with somebody out of the tiny house movement, or a house that's just plain lacking in bathrooms with not much space for wedging the ones it needs in? You might end up with a bathroom with a toilet, a sink, and everything tiled so you can use the whole thing as a shower stall. I've looked at an example--the only bathroom the house came with was so insanely laid out that the sole reason to believe that it was, in fact, built into the house was because inside bathrooms had been a thing for a century by the time it was built. (It was basically a secret passage, with various elements of a bathroom tucked into nooks along it and at the very end, instead of treasure, was a toilet.)

      Also, honestly, if my choices are 'larger tub,' 'tub and shower seperate,' and 'bidet'? Yeah, let's go with bidet function in the toilet seat, soaking tubs are awesome and if you're sharing the place with somebody who takes eternal soaks or showers like I've been doing? Being able to both bathe at once might be required simply so you get to bathe at all.

    15. Re:More Space Please by wyHunter · · Score: 1

      Yeah those giant great rooms have never been something that appealed to me.

  8. Share and Enjoy! by Thud457 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Jesus Christ, that thing's more complicated than the Moon Lander!

    And if you get it wrong, it pisses right back at you!

    --

    the preceding comment is my own and in no way reflects the opinion of the Joint Chiefs of Staff

    1. Re:Share and Enjoy! by Tablizer · · Score: 1

      How about that, icons with booties. I hope those don't end up in the Unicode set.

    2. Re:Share and Enjoy! by Tablizer · · Score: 5, Funny

      Jesus Christ, that thing's more complicated than the Moon Lander!

      Actually, it is a "moon" lander.

    3. Re:Share and Enjoy! by jimbob6 · · Score: 4, Funny

      Don't accidently hit the "tampon remove" button.

    4. Re:Share and Enjoy! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      "He doesn't know how to use the three seashells!"

    5. Re:Share and Enjoy! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      Jesus Christ, that thing's [wikimedia.org] more complicated than the Moon Lander!

      Looks like Stop > enema > ass wash > feminine wash > air dry

      If you guessed
      Square Jack for iPhone > money shot > wet T-shirt soak > Hover like David Blaine > Bacon
      Well that is why you are not very good at IQ tests.

      Hmm..Yes, maybe IQ tests should all be done with button answers while sitting on a toilet with unpredictable results.
      Well off to pitch that reality show idea.

    6. Re:Share and Enjoy! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I would see that, leave my shit where it sits and just walk away. Every time.

    7. Re:Share and Enjoy! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Jesus Christ, that thing's more complicated than the Moon Lander!

      And if you get it wrong, it pisses right back at you!

      Just be grateful these toilets have a physical interface (finite trial and error procedure gets you the result you want). Would you imagine the pain trying to talk to one of these things (if they had an AI), or using one through a touch interface ?

    8. Re:Share and Enjoy! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Weirdly that reminds me of a washing machine saw in Europe last time I was there. Not a word, letter or google-able foreign phrase in sight, just a bunch of unintelligible pictograms and a vague hope they didn't mean "shred my shirts, please".

    9. Re:Share and Enjoy! by Zak3056 · · Score: 1

      Would you imagine the pain trying to talk to one of these things (if they had an AI), or using one through a touch interface ?

      Mr Toilet banishes waste with the power of wind and ghosts!

      --
      What part of "shall not be infringed" is so hard to understand?
    10. Re:Share and Enjoy! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Now that you introduced the possibility that one of the two moon shots is an enema, I'll never touch either of them. Back to TP.

    11. Re: Share and Enjoy! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      In Europe you'd need to have about twenty different languages on to work in all markets, hence the pictograms. It's similar for washing instructions on clothes, and sometimes it's just a case of pictogram snap. People in Europe know what they mean, luckily, but maybe there's a market for a pictogram phrase book for washing machines and road signs.

    12. Re:Share and Enjoy! by AK+Marc · · Score: 1

      How do you use the three seashells?

    13. Re:Share and Enjoy! by AthanasiusKircher · · Score: 1

      And if you get it wrong, it pisses right back at you!

      Yes, I first visited Japan around 1990, and I remember the first time I encountered one of those toilets. (Well, the functions weren't quite as advanced as what you linked, but still several odd buttons.)

      Curious, I pressed a couple of buttons (expecting maybe a different flush or something -- one of the buttons played music or something, if I recall), and that exact scene happened to me. Some bizarre protuberance jutted forth from the back of the toilet and sprayed water all over the room. Thank goodness I wasn't sitting on it at the time, because I think it was set to maximum jet force, and I don't think I have the right "demeanor" to appreciate that.

      Instead I just had to mop up the room. And later had a really awkward conversation in broken English/Japanese with my hostess about why her towels were all soaked.

      I've since encountered these toilets many times and have thought of getting one myself. But if I ever owned a home with one, I'd put up an instruction sheet in 5 languages on the wall or something when guests came by.

    14. Re: Share and Enjoy! by rworne · · Score: 5, Informative

      It's not "enema"

      It's Stop, Butt Rinse, Butt Rinse (gentle, for hemorrhoids), Feminine Wash, and Air Dry.

      Opening the cover for those controls you usually only mess with once is just for comedic effect. But those controls are for moving the jet forward or backward to bullseye the target area, stream strength, pulsed or non-pulsing streams, temperature, and seat warming settings.

      Yeah, we had one of these. Don't knock them till you try them, your sphincter will thank you later, especially when wiping is like trying to get peanut butter out of a shag carpet.

      --
      I tried every decent and legal way I could think of to resolve the issue w/the business before I rented the chicken suit
    15. Re:Share and Enjoy! by pr0fessor · · Score: 1

      I don't think I have ever seen a bidet at least not in person, I could easily imagine some mid-westerner getting an unexpected jet of water on a public toilet and having a heart attack.

    16. Re:Share and Enjoy! by JoeMerchant · · Score: 1

      Awesome, how do I get one for my house?

    17. Re:Share and Enjoy! by drew_kime · · Score: 1

      Why does it have a boob-powered flux capacitor?

      --
      Nope, no sig
    18. Re:Share and Enjoy! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Fsck that. I stand next to a swear report monitor ticket dispenser until I have enough paper to wipe my ass clean

    19. Re:Share and Enjoy! by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 1

      >Jesus Christ, that thing's [wikimedia.org] more complicated than the Moon Lander!

      Using my rather hopeless knowledge of Japanese:

      The biggest two buttons on the top
          oo-Large, Shou-Small.

      The rightmost 3 buttons are icons, not Japanese.

      The big buttons along the front...
          Shi - Stop, ahshira - Buttocks, yawaraka - soft, heta - (kanji transliteration of heater), Kansou? - Dryer

      Everything below the panel - To set up the temperate and water pressure.

      --
      I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    20. Re: Share and Enjoy! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      You'll be just fine as long as you don't have something resembling a small piece of string dangling between your legs.

    21. Re: Share and Enjoy! by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 1

      Don't knock them till you try them, your sphincter will thank you later, especially when wiping is like trying to get peanut butter out of a shag carpet.

      To be fair, peanut butter smells worse.

      --
      I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    22. Re: Share and Enjoy! by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 1
      --
      I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    23. Re:Share and Enjoy! by HuguesT · · Score: 1

      Well played :-)

    24. Re:Share and Enjoy! by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 1

      After much googling and looking up my Kanji dictionary, the top two buttons are for large flush and small flush.

      heta ain't heta. It's beda the transliteration of bidet - the pixelly image didn't make the diacritics clear. Presumably for squirting water where your girly bits might be if you are a girl. I understand that many males on Slashdot have not met females, so this might be hard to grasp.

      --
      I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    25. Re:Share and Enjoy! by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 2

      I don't think I have ever seen a bidet at least not in person, I could easily imagine some mid-westerner getting an unexpected jet of water on a public toilet and having a heart attack.

      If you are in a country where a bidet is common, you would find it sitting next to the toilet, so you wouldn't get an ass-squirt induced heart attack without actually getting up and moving over to the bidet, sitting down and turning it on.

      --
      I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    26. Re:Share and Enjoy! by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 1

      Jesus Christ, that thing's more complicated than the Moon Lander!

      And if you get it wrong, it pisses right back at you!

      Just be grateful these toilets have a physical interface (finite trial and error procedure gets you the result you want). Would you imagine the pain trying to talk to one of these things (if they had an AI), or using one through a touch interface ?

      Well hacking some json receiver into the squirty toilet seat so you can say "Alexa, wash my bottocks" is now going to have to be done.

      --
      I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    27. Re:Share and Enjoy! by b783719 · · Score: 1

      Clearly, you're holding it wrong.

    28. Re:Share and Enjoy! by hambone142 · · Score: 1

      Do they have a "finish you off" button?

    29. Re:Share and Enjoy! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Except in this model you trigger P00DOO first, then BAILOUT.

    30. Re: Share and Enjoy! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      Think I figured it out. The round buttons appear to be for power, unzip tits, tits on table, sit on table, and synthwave. The top buttons appear to control a tape deck and the bottom is a programmable thermostat that always set to 70 because no one can figure out how the fuck to program it.

    31. Re: Share and Enjoy! by hambone142 · · Score: 1

      (my eyes are watering from laughing at this response)

      You needed to include the "this may cause you to spray your coffee on your keyboard" warning WRT the peanut butter/shag carpet comment.

      It's way too much reality for me.

    32. Re:Share and Enjoy! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Or if you weren't a racist fuck you'd realize it's perfectly usable to anyone literate in Japanese.

      To bad it doesn't cater to your "must be made my English speakers or it's shit" mentality

    33. Re: Share and Enjoy! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Now if only I had that in 2009 :(

    34. Re:Share and Enjoy! by rtb61 · · Score: 1

      Consider the alternate. Which other parts of you body are you content to smear your faeces over and then consider clean with simply wipe with a piece of paper. Hell, you wash your hands and law mandates you wash you hands if you work in a kitchen and that was with a piece of paper between your hands and you faeces, yet you are content with your non-self cleaning butthole and surrounding contaminated regions. Get used to it, the change is very likely to spread no matter how much the dead tree ass wipe companies fight it. Logically it should be compulsory in food preparation areas and hospitals, no so much for the butt but for the hands.

      --
      Chaos - everything, everywhere, everywhen
    35. Re:Share and Enjoy! by greggman · · Score: 1

      It's not more complicated than any standard English TV remote.

      The only thing that makes it appear complicated is that you can't read Japanese. If you did read Japanese it would be very clear.

    36. Re:Share and Enjoy! by Coren22 · · Score: 1

      Except as this whole article is about bidets built into the toilets in Japan, where you can be unexpectedly sprayed by a jet of water because of a misunderstanding of the iconography on the toilets.

      --
      APK likes to ask for responses to the same things over and over. Maybe he just likes the responses?
    37. Re: Share and Enjoy! by Coren22 · · Score: 1

      Butt Rinse, Butt Rinse (gentle, for hemorrhoids),

      I thought one of those buttons (from clues in TFS) is for hot air to dry. I just assumed that was what the third button did. Are you saying it actually is just a different spray?

      --
      APK likes to ask for responses to the same things over and over. Maybe he just likes the responses?
    38. Re: Share and Enjoy! by rworne · · Score: 1

      On the linked photo, yes. It's a "gentle" spray. Hemorrhoids are very common in Japan, and a strong blast would be the last thing you need.

      --
      I tried every decent and legal way I could think of to resolve the issue w/the business before I rented the chicken suit
    39. Re:Share and Enjoy! by fedos · · Score: 1

      A guy in my college German class went to Germany for a vacation with his wife during the semester. Apparently his wife was unexpectedly pushed off a public restroom toilet after trying to give herself a courtesy flush but instead pressing a button the initiated a scrubbing of the seat.

    40. Re:Share and Enjoy! by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 2

      Except as this whole article is about bidets built into the toilets in Japan, where you can be unexpectedly sprayed by a jet of water because of a misunderstanding of the iconography on the toilets.

      I understand that this is the basic plot of most anime cartoons.

      --
      I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    41. Re: Share and Enjoy! by TechyImmigrant · · Score: 1

      Now if only I had that in 2009 :(

      I grew up in Europe and used washing machines, so they are reasonably burned into my long term mental storage.

      --
      I should use this sig to advertise my book ISBN-13 : 978-1501515132.
    42. Re: Share and Enjoy! by CommanderRyalis · · Score: 1

      Adam Corolla used that line all the time in defense of trimming his hedge

    43. Re:Share and Enjoy! by RespekMyAthorati · · Score: 1

      Some bizarre protuberance jutted forth from the back of the toilet and sprayed water all over the room.

      The one we have won't spray unless it detects that someone is sitting on the seat.
      And it is the best invention ever: no TP, just a gentle spray with warm water.

    44. Re:Share and Enjoy! by RockDoctor · · Score: 1

      But if I ever owned a home with one, I'd put up an instruction sheet in 5 languages on the wall

      And cue the person who only reads a 6th language to come along.

      --
      Birds are not dinosaur descendants;birds are dinosaurs, for all useful meanings of "birds", "are" and "dinosaurs"
  9. Buttons would be nice !!! by ripvlan · · Score: 2

    Years ago, while on vacation in Japan, I stepped into a bathroom only to find a large room with a row of holes in the floor and trapeze like handles (such as on a subway car) suspended from above.

    I really didn't need to go that bad.... and used the tree in the corner instead.

    1. Re:Buttons would be nice !!! by Gilgaron · · Score: 1

      I've been in places in Europe with similar public restrooms. They also closed at 8pm, with the bars not having public restrooms. Easy enough as a male to find a dark corner to relieve myself in, but it seemed odd that there wasn't a better solution provided for the tourists than peeing on their fortress.

    2. Re:Buttons would be nice !!! by AK+Marc · · Score: 1

      In China (a few years before the Olympics) the bathrooms near the area were installing western toilets. The rooms would have a line of "local" stalls, and one (or more, but usually one) tourist toilet. The locals never used the tourist toilet. Seems dirty to sit, rather than squat, for the locals. Local toilets had no flushes. Some were outhouse style, others had a trough below that had a slow steady stream to wash into the sewer. I have no idea if the areas below had any regular cleaning.

    3. Re:Buttons would be nice !!! by PrimaryConsult · · Score: 1

      Handles suspended from above? You must have found the deluxe room. Even the one at the airport requires careful balance.

      Urban Japanese must be just as put off by the squat toilets as we are, as evidenced by my finding bathrooms with only western style toilets in many office buildings and train stations (even outside the touristy areas).

    4. Re:Buttons would be nice !!! by hambone142 · · Score: 1

      I was working in Singapore once. At the facility, they had Western toilets. Above the toilets, they had instructions for the locals telling them "not to stand on the lids" when they took a crap. Seems they weren't used to sitting on one and were used to squatting over a hole to dump their load.

      That brought on a whole different cultural perspective regarding what we consider to be common.

    5. Re:Buttons would be nice !!! by ripvlan · · Score: 1

      Right - the airports, offices, restaurants (in Tokyo & Yokohama), and apartments were all western style. Really never a problem.

      Back in the more modern populated areas I found mostly western and several dual designs - squat & western in the same bathroom. Sometimes squat with a stall around it. Sometimes western in a stall and squat in the middle of the room ("them westerners sure like their privacy - weirdos!")

      I found the "traditional" toilets north of Tokyo while touring the temples and gardens. I will always remember the giant single room with 6 metal collars rising from the floor - no privacy at all. Although the giant bathtub of a urinal in the Aloha stadium men's room in Honolulu was rather shocking. Hadn't seen that design since "that dive-bar" back in college.

      Gee - almost seems like a topic for an architectural themed coffee table book?!!

    6. Re:Buttons would be nice !!! by ripvlan · · Score: 1

      haa hahaa aahhh ha. [snort] You are not the first person to tell me about such a sign.

      "Common" --right on! You think about it --- the shock of squat toilets...and what do the Locals think of "us" and the western toilet. When they travel to (say) the USA they must all laugh among themselves about our weird customs.

  10. Drunk at 2:00AM in Tokyo no longer be hazardous? by mykepredko · · Score: 2

    I've not spent a lot of time in Japan but on future trips I will have a little nostalgia remembering coming in after a long night of Karaoke and trying to figure out how to relieve myself without flooding the bathroom.

    Of course, that option is a lot better than the ubiquitous hole in the floor with a shell that you squat over that my wife always wondered why I took pictures of.

  11. FIRST LOOK AT THE NEW TOILET PICTOGRAM! by PopeRatzo · · Score: 0
    --
    You are welcome on my lawn.
    1. Re:FIRST LOOK AT THE NEW TOILET PICTOGRAM! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Photoshopped.

    2. Re:FIRST LOOK AT THE NEW TOILET PICTOGRAM! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I apologize to PopeRatzo for saying that the image above was photoshopped. I've done further research and it's real.

    3. Re:FIRST LOOK AT THE NEW TOILET PICTOGRAM! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Looks like Putin's kompromat leaked early.

    4. Re:FIRST LOOK AT THE NEW TOILET PICTOGRAM! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      So what happened to the third flush button?

  12. "Spray" vs "bidet"? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I still don't understand. What's the difference?

    The only answer I could come with was that one was meant for butts and the other for women, which would be an unpleasant surprise to any man who hit that button.

    1. Re:"Spray" vs "bidet"? by Oswald+McWeany · · Score: 1

      We have a bidet toilet seat on our toilet at home. There is a women's cleansing option, and yes, of course, I have tried it out. The spray just hits a slightly different spot. Still shoots at the crack, just lower down, missing the actual butt hole. Don't worry, it won't pulverize your nads.

      --
      "That's the way to do it" - Punch
  13. Happy Poopy Time by necro81 · · Score: 3, Funny
  14. For being under the bottom, that's over the top! by mmell · · Score: 1

    Thomas Crapper and Leonardo Da Vinci would both uninvent the water flush closet if they'd known it would come to this.

  15. Industrial water knife button by Omnifarious · · Score: 1

    Does it have one of those? It looks a little like it should have it. That would certainly surprise people.

  16. I don't stay seated when flushing by mrbester · · Score: 2

    If I'm pushing a button that I think means flush I have already stood up and adjusted my clothing beforehand in order to avoid *any* possible complications from that operation. These certainly include unexpected jets of water coming from the bowl.

    --
    "Wait. Something's happening. It's opening up! My God, it's full of apricots!"
    1. Re:I don't stay seated when flushing by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I seriously doubt you'd be in the correct position to avoid this when you are flushing...

    2. Re:I don't stay seated when flushing by PPH · · Score: 1

      They make lids for a reason. Actually, more than one. Ever seen the aerosolized particles that come out of a flushing toilet? That ends the whole "Seat down, lid up" argument.

      --
      Have gnu, will travel.
    3. Re:I don't stay seated when flushing by mrbester · · Score: 1

      Oh, I'm fully prepared for the possibility of alacritous flight being required. Once bitten, and all that. What PPH describes above isn't close to what I have encountered over the years.

      --
      "Wait. Something's happening. It's opening up! My God, it's full of apricots!"
  17. What Everyone Wants by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    This is what everyone wants:

    1). Go to the toilet, first thing in the morning. Barely awake;
    2). Fill out a mandatory pre-use survey;
    3). Do your business, not convinced you are even using the right appliance;
    4). Play a game of chicken with the obscure controls;
    5). Toilet clogs;
    6). No apparent way of unclogging toilet;
    7). Give up in disgust and frustration, leaving the mess for others.

    Yes, people loved to be challenged by the toilet!

  18. Which is by dasgoober · · Score: 1

    ... the "I ate a greasy bacon cheese-burger for lunch" wash?

    1. Re:Which is by hambone142 · · Score: 1

      Power wash with degreaser option of course.

  19. A little too late. by SeaFox · · Score: 3, Insightful

    As Japan prepares for an influx of overseas visitors during the 2019 rugby World Cup and the Tokyo Olympics the following year...

    What good is standardizing the pictographs now? Toilets stay in service for decades before being replaced. So unless they are going to have some sticker campaign to relabel all the ones already out there, it's too late.

    1. Re:A little too late. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      As Japan prepares for an influx of overseas visitors during the 2019 rugby World Cup and the Tokyo Olympics the following year...

      What good is standardizing the pictographs now? Toilets stay in service for decades before being replaced. So unless they are going to have some sticker campaign to relabel all the ones already out there, it's too late.

      Because an enlightened society is one in which adults plant trees who's shade they'll never sit in.

    2. Re:A little too late. by Gilgaron · · Score: 1

      Hosting the Olympics is usually associated with a bunch of slapdash construction of the required facilities.

    3. Re:A little too late. by charlesj68 · · Score: 2

      Because an enlightened society is one in which adults plant trees who's shade they'll never sit in.

      But enough about bonsai ...

    4. Re:A little too late. by thegarbz · · Score: 1

      Toilets stay in service for decades before being replaced.

      These aren't your western mechanical toilets. These are electrical, likely made in China with a Japanese name on it and running buggy software which the vendor refuses to fix instead offering to sell you a new shit shitter every 2 years. Plus your old toilet doesn't have 4K so why are you still using it you luddite. Throw it away like the electronic disposable crapper it is and get yourself some modern technology.

    5. Re:A little too late. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The Japanese probably buy the latest toilet every six months. :)

    6. Re:A little too late. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I really don't want to imagine what a toilet would use a 4K display for.

    7. Re:A little too late. by Aighearach · · Score: 1

      IME the Chinese parts suppliers are very happy to update firmware and push out an update in just a few hours with little or no testing, and the only reason westerners have trouble getting the updates is that we don't read Chinese.

      Japanese can read the Chinese well enough to send the right email to get the updates.

      Plus, they might really be able to get them standardized in the main tourist areas for the sporting events. They don't have to update the whole country to get a noticeable improvement.

    8. Re:A little too late. by AmiMoJo · · Score: 1

      They make clip on covers with replacement button caps for customers who want them in languages other than Japanese. I imagine they will do the same for these new symbols in places that want to upgrade.

      Also, stuff gets replaced in Japan more often than the West, and toilets are modular. You can replace the control panel, the seat or the whole thing.

      --
      const int one = 65536; (Silvermoon, Texture.cs)
      SJW, n: "Someone I don't like, and by the way I'm a fuckwit" - AC
    9. Re:A little too late. by toonces33 · · Score: 1

      Of what if you can't use the thing because it is busy downloading updates.

      Wait until there is an IOT toilet, and then it gets infected with malware so that it sprays you with cold water instead of warm.

    10. Re:A little too late. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I seen lines out the Apple Store for people desperately needing to replace there obsolete toilet, thats technology for yeh.

  20. Standard Buttons? by dohzer · · Score: 1

    Standard Buttons? So like, the first button is for small flush and the other one is for big?

  21. The three seashells by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Just like in demolition man. And stallone was confused!

  22. Japanese toilet pictography by PPH · · Score: 1

    I fear where this might go. (NSFW?)

    --
    Have gnu, will travel.
    1. Re:Japanese toilet pictography by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Tsuruya laughs at your tiny penis!

  23. Because a bidet was too hard for Japan... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I the Philippines they don't even have a bidet you just use the little bucket.

    1. Re:Because a bidet was too hard for Japan... by fedos · · Score: 1

      I never leave home without my aubesian.

  24. Buttons Galore by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    The first time I visited Japan, I pressed the wrong button on the toilet, and a geisha girl came into the stall. I asked her name. "Buttons Galore."

  25. Obligatory by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    https://xkcd.com/927/

  26. Having been to Japan... by toonces33 · · Score: 1

    I can say that it isn't really that complicated. Yeah, there are a few buttons. You just try them one at a time to see what happens. What's the worst that can happen?

  27. So what does by CanadianMacFan · · Score: 1

    Can someone tell me what the upside down bird held aloft by a water fountain do? (I'm aware what it really represents but when I first saw it it reminded me of how kids draw birds.)

  28. Voice recognition model by lazy+genes · · Score: 0

    "OK Google, lick my butthole"