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Scientists Have Mathematical Proof That It's Impossible To Stop Aging (sciencealert.com)

An anonymous reader quotes a report from Science Alert: Mathematically speaking, multicellular organisms like us will always have to deal with a cellular competition where only one side will win. And ultimately, that means our vitality will always come out as the loser. We have a pair of researchers from the University of Arizona to blame for this depressing conclusion, who crunched the numbers on a hypothesis involving the weeding out of unfit cells and found it amounted to a catch-22 situation. Aging -- and all of the biological changes that come with it -- is more or less the result of cells slowing down and losing their functions. But what if there was a way to encourage the more active cells to stick around at the expense of their sluggish siblings? Surely if we knocked off those old cells we could keep making pigments and collagen a little longer. Researchers have pinned hopes on reversing the inevitable decay of biochemistry by repairing DNA or extending the shrinking bits of chromosome called telomeres, for example. While it's good in theory, there is a catch. Another feature of aging is a number of cells start to populate like there's no tomorrow, reproducing in uncontrolled ways that look too close to cancer for comfort. According to the researchers, this means we're damned either way.

The way we grow old poses something of a mystery. If replicating biology is good enough to continue for generations, why do our own cells wind down after just a few decades? A simple answer is evolution isn't strong enough to weed out genes that only cause us grief after we've popped out a few offspring. But this model of aging adds a new element to the existing hypothesis -- even if evolution did select for eternal youth, competition inside our own bodies would see us to an inevitable grave. In other words, since multicellular organisms are the cumulative effect of bunches of cooperating cells, we logically can't have it both ways -- if you clear the way for 'younger' cells to keep your skin baby-smooth, you're just asking for the big C.
The findings have been published in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.

177 comments

  1. Unbalanced Machine by Drethon · · Score: 2

    This just kind of sounds to me like a PID controller tuned for the short term that goes out of control in the long term. Probably just falsely applying what I know to something completely unrelated...

    1. Re:Unbalanced Machine by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Sure, it sounds like it, because they oversimplified the problem. One issue with engineering education is that in order to make problems solvable, they teach you to make a lot of assumptions to simplify the problem. It's a useful tool for making control systems on a small scale, but for more complex systems like biology(even single celled organisms), politics, economics, weather, climate, psychology, it doesn't work. I think this disconnect leads to a lot of arrogance(I myself had to learn the hard way) about what we have the ability to control or even predict. I think this arrogance, the over simplification of complexity, is largely why engineers tend to be the most likely candidates for terrorism. They have immense power to understand and control simply systems, so why not big complex systems too? https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/monkey-cage/wp/2015/11/17/this-is-the-group-thats-surprisingly-prone-to-violent-extremism/

    2. Re:Unbalanced Machine by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Insightful

      Well there's always analogies.

      With humans, the analogy is to both a computer and to virus itself.

      The more the cells replicate, the more they have to compete for resources, thus they will always reach a tipping point where there is a population crash. That is what "aging" is. There are too many cells in the body that competition among them results in unbalanced resources, and the body starts destroying cells in a desperate attempt to stave off the inevitable.

      Take grey hair as an example. Grey hair is the result of bubbles being introduced into the hair strands as pigments stop being produced.

      Obesity is another, the body has so many cells that it doesn't know to destroy the fat cells and not, say heart or muscle tissue.

      If you were to be able to rewind the telomeres, what would inevitably happen is that the cells would continue to divide, regardless of errors, to the point that they starve. This is why Cancer happens. Those are cells where the "stop and die" function has been disabled.

      When you lose weight, the body doesn't know what cells to burn. When you eat too much protein, the body doesn't know if it should be burned before burning muscle when starving.

      Hence your body has a natural balancing mechanic, and when you force something out of balance, it compensates, in often unpredictable ways. People who get cancer, near universally have some bad habit that could be pinned on it before you could point to genetic factors.

      Sugar and artificial sweeteners are very likely at the top of the bad habit list, right after alcohol and smoking as "likely the reason your body started producing cancer cells"

    3. Re:Unbalanced Machine by ColdWetDog · · Score: 1

      Ah good. Thanks for that AC. Now we can go home.

      Are you an engineer, perchance?

      --
      Faster! Faster! Faster would be better!
    4. Re: Unbalanced Machine by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Insightful

      Yes correct. Moreover they have misunderstood their own math. It doesn't say that aging cannot be repaired. It said that evolution cannot do it. There is no organism that lays spare parts in cold storage and then swaps them out when parts wear out. We however could eventually make spare parts.

    5. Re:Unbalanced Machine by kelemvor4 · · Score: 3, Informative

      Sure, it sounds like it, because they oversimplified the problem. One issue with engineering education is that in order to make problems solvable, they teach you to make a lot of assumptions to simplify the problem. It's a useful tool for making control systems on a small scale, but for more complex systems like biology(even single celled organisms), politics, economics, weather, climate, psychology, it doesn't work. I think this disconnect leads to a lot of arrogance(I myself had to learn the hard way) about what we have the ability to control or even predict. I think this arrogance, the over simplification of complexity, is largely why engineers tend to be the most likely candidates for terrorism. They have immense power to understand and control simply systems, so why not big complex systems too? https://www.washingtonpost.com...

      Sort of. The article starts by talking about terrorists, but when they get into talking about engineers specifically they shift to talking about "leaders of extreme right-wing groups".

      In other words, that article is political propaganda that we've become accustomed to seeing from the Washington post or in Slashdot terms: "nothing to see here,move along."

    6. Re:Unbalanced Machine by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Are animals that live for over 100 years magical? No! Work harder, scientists!

    7. Re:Unbalanced Machine by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I don't know. I think it's characteristic of extreme right wing groups to oversimplify, stereotype, group, and come up with heavy handed solutions based on those incorrect assumptions.

    8. Re:Unbalanced Machine by mjm1231 · · Score: 1

      Sort of. The article starts by talking about terrorists, but when they get into talking about engineers specifically they shift to talking about "leaders of extreme right-wing groups".

      Um, that isn't necessarily a shift. More terrorist acts which occur on US soil are perpetrated by right-wing groups than by any other group.

      --
      Ideology: A tool used primarily to avoid the bother of thinking.
    9. Re:Unbalanced Machine by nitehawk214 · · Score: 1

      Seems reasonable. Evolution has made beings able to reproduce. There isn't any evolution pressure on adults living must past the time when their children can reproduce. Yes there are some benefits of longer lived species as the older ones provide wisdom and protection to the younger, but there is a falling off point.

      --
      I'm a good cook. I'm a fantastic eater. - Steven Brust
    10. Re:Unbalanced Machine by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Sorry you don't like your team being called out for their violent authoritarianism. Do you need a safe space?

    11. Re: Unbalanced Machine by sexconker · · Score: 1

      There is no organism that lays spare parts in cold storage and then swaps them out when parts wear out.

      Hermit crabs? Hell, some of them form a line when a new shell is found. They then all trade shells, hand-me-down fashion.

    12. Re: Unbalanced Machine by Aighearach · · Score: 1

      Sure, but those don't count as parts for this analysis.

    13. Re:Unbalanced Machine by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      If you count islam as part of right wing. Islamic terrorists want total state control along their perverted religious ideals. Conservatives do not want anything close to total state control along any lines.

    14. Re:Unbalanced Machine by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Keep telling yourself that bunkie. Repeat a lie often enough and maybe people will start to believe it.

    15. Re: Unbalanced Machine by sexconker · · Score: 1

      Why not?

      Many jellyfish will revert back to an earlier stage of development and regrow to adulthood, fresh and clean, and essentially don't die due to age.
      Other fish and many plants also beat out aging in similar ways. And many more organisms such as fungi blur the lines by being part of a large distributed colony that's a single thing. It's like rebuilding a car. If you gradually replace every part, at what point is it a different car? Why doesn't sexual reproduction fit the spare parts description? You've got critical parts you toss together in a factory to make a new unit. Yes, the unit is different, but that's a feature. What about asexual reproduction where offspring are clones? How many mutations have to build up, and how significant do they have to be, before it's a different organism? Is physical separation from the parent the marker? If so, why? (And again, refer to examples of colony-type organisms like corals and fungi.)

      Maybe all we are is a bunch of spare parts for some single celled organism that lives in our shit?

    16. Re: Unbalanced Machine by Aighearach · · Score: 1

      Live cells are still different than dead cells. This is about the aging of live cells.

    17. Re: Unbalanced Machine by sexconker · · Score: 1

      Live cells are still different than dead cells. This is about the aging of live cells.

      No, this is about the AC statement:

      There is no organism that lays spare parts in cold storage and then swaps them out when parts wear out. We however could eventually make spare parts.

    18. Re: Unbalanced Machine by Aighearach · · Score: 1

      Right... once again you can't comprehend my clear words. :) New day, same story.

      I'll just repeat myself. Live cells are still different than dead cells. This is about the aging of live cells.

      In the case of a hermit crab, it is only replacing dead cells, so it is nothing at all like the part-swapping being discussed here. Does that help you to comprehend the meaning of the words?

  2. This is a good thing by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

    Otherwise, you'd end up with a perpetual system where people who are slightly older are always in positions of authority. This never gives the new generation an opportunity to grow up. Sort of like now, where boomers didn't retire to make space for new workers.

    1. Re:This is a good thing by Script+Cat · · Score: 2

      This is why we have term limits.

    2. Re: This is a good thing by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Two points:

      As a boomer; if someone would be willing to assure me and my wife of a reasonable standard of living , I would be willing to retire today.

      When you are turning 60, I predict you will have a different perspective than you do today.

    3. Re:This is a good thing by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      We do? Someone should have told that to Strom Thurmond.

    4. Re: This is a good thing by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      if someone would be willing to assure me and my wife of a reasonable standard of living

      It was never anyone's responsibility but your own to provide for yourself and your family.

    5. Re:This is a good thing by nitehawk214 · · Score: 1

      Tell that to Congress.

      --
      I'm a good cook. I'm a fantastic eater. - Steven Brust
  3. Sigh, no they didn't by JoshuaZ · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Ok. I'm a mathematician, so I think I have some degree of expertise relevant to comment when someone says that they have a mathematical proof of something. You cannot give a mathematical proof of something in the physical world. At most, you can give a mathematical proof that something is true in some model of the physical world. Your model may or may not match expectations. This occurs all the time; there are all sorts of proofs of security in cryptography (generally assuming certain computational complexity assumptions) and yet the crypto systems are frequently broken by using clever side-channel attacks or other clever tricks that couldn't be done in the context of the model of computation being used. In this case the fact that some other species can live much longer than humans is by itself a pretty big sign that the model is by far from a perfect one. And from glancing at the article in question, it looks like the scientists actually didn't claim nearly as big a deal as the summary suggests.

    1. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Even if aging cannot be stopped that does not mean it can never be dealt with. Some creatures have a solution that works for them.

    2. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      You seem to vastly overrate the intelligence/knowledge/analytical abilities of Slashdot readers. I find this kind of tripe (A mathematical "proof" of X, where X is a real world phenomenon) an egregious abuse of mine. I guess, like cells, news sites also decay.

    3. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Ol+Olsoc · · Score: 4, Interesting

      Ok. I'm a mathematician, so I think I have some degree of expertise relevant to comment when someone says that they have a mathematical proof of something. You cannot give a mathematical proof of something in the physical world.

      You are of course correct. I think they are using the wrong words "mathematical proof" when the accurate term is "extensive modelling."

      But that's the world we live in, where Mathematical proof sounds so smart and right, and extensive modelling probably sounds like women and men walking around on catwalks to show off clothing.

      The abstract :http://www.pnas.org/content/early/2017/10/25/1618854114

      The full text http://www.pnas.org/content/ea...

      A really quick perusal of the full paper doesn't show any particular issues, it is simply a model run to some conclusion. As always, some assumptions have to be made. As such, there is nothing outlandish or red flagging about it.

      I think the tl;dr version of all this is don't put a lot of stock in articles that try to bridge popular culture and science - read the actual papers.

      --
      The shepherds did so well protecting the flock that the sheep no longer believed that wolves existed.
    4. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I'm a more important, higher-level mathematician than you, posting anonymously because I can't reveal my identity. I just drew some some stuff on my white board that shows you are completely wrong.

    5. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by OneHundredAndTen · · Score: 5, Insightful

      And from glancing at the article in question, it looks like the scientists actually didn't claim nearly as big a deal as the summary suggests.

      Unfortunately, that is par for the course for the mainstream press, which lives on hyperbole, distortion and exaggeration. In fact, it is not too far-fetched to assert that the mainstream has been, for a long time now, moving from the news report business to the entertainment business.

    6. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by the_skywise · · Score: 2

      I have no argument that the model is "correct" but that's like saying I made a mathematical proof that I'll go bankrupt if I keep spending $500 a month but only earn $400 and it's an inevitable conclusion that I'm doomed and then patting myself on the back for how clever I am. (Hint: not much if I'm spending more than I earn!)

      I don't even need a mathematical proof to say that extending life is difficult as there's plenty of evidence with man-made objects which are 100% controllable machines and can be rebuilt-repaired indefinitely but eventually it always becomes a lost cause.

      No system is a perpetual motion machine nor can it ever be a perpetual motion machine by the very laws of physics!
      But that won't stop us from trying!

    7. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by PolygamousRanchKid+ · · Score: 1

      Ok. I'm a mathematician, so I think I have some degree of expertise relevant to comment when someone says that they have a mathematical proof of something.

      Well, then again, Kurt Gödel told us that there is stuff that is true, but cannot be proved to be true . . .

      . . . so there!

      Maybe.

      --
      Schroedinger's Brexit: The UK is both in and out of the EU at the same time!
    8. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Jamu · · Score: 5, Funny

      Living and aging are the same thing. Obviously aging can be stopped.

      --
      Who ordered that?
    9. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Oswald+McWeany · · Score: 1

      That's pretty cool... and there are trees on this planet that are close to 5,000 years old. That's not immortal, but it's pretty clear they have aging controlled pretty well. Trees may be simple compared to many advanced animal life, but they're still pretty complex organisms.

      I don't believe preventing aging is impossible; it's just very difficult. If we live long enough we'll find a solution to aging.

      --
      "That's the way to do it" - Punch
    10. Re: Sigh, no they didn't by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Correct and it's not saying aging cannot be stopped either. It's saying that evolution cannot solve it. A bit of thought shows that anyhow. Our cells are basically a bunch of clones. Clones eventually accumulate too much damage to be repaired. Rejuvenation is basically fertilization of egg with sperm. Then the clone cycle starts again. Right there is probably the answer to the cannot be stopped thing. We don't need to stop it just make spare parts.

    11. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by avandesande · · Score: 2

      There is a stand of aspen in Utah they estimate at 80,000 years....
      https://www.treehugger.com/nat...

      --
      love is just extroverted narcissism
    12. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by mark-t · · Score: 1

      No system is a perpetual motion machine nor can it ever be a perpetual motion machine by the very laws of physics!

      Hubble space expansion seems pretty perpetual. The fact that we havenâ(TM)t figured out any way to tap into it is irrelevant

    13. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by epine · · Score: 1

      You are of course correct. I think they are using the wrong words "mathematical proof" when the accurate term is "extensive modelling."

      If by "extensive" you mean building the simplest possible model that some significant subset of the chattering class is willing to regard as credible for all of the five minutes it takes to seagull post and flit onto the next topic.

      Excellent work. Now the reader is equipped with a yellow flag that activates (one hopes) on next encounter with a similarly thumping article (subtype: da da da DAH!) beating the vapid drum that "it's the telomere, stupid!"

      Now well-equipped reader thinks, I once read a MOASH (mother of all stupid headlines) to the effect that merely fixing the telomeres lurks below the snake oil horizon.

      This is what hapless mayfly dredges out of his or her damp, woven basket promulgated as "proof".

      Appalling.

      Even the huddled yeast on this proof basket fail to thrive.

    14. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by datavirtue · · Score: 1

      I have mathematical proof of fairies and leprechauns.

      --
      I object to power without constructive purpose. --Spock
    15. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by datavirtue · · Score: 1

      Crocodiles are immortal.

      --
      I object to power without constructive purpose. --Spock
    16. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      You're confusing "living a lot longer" with living a lot longer by stopping cells from aging. These are two completely different things. What they're basically saying is that even if you stop cell aging you will die another way.

    17. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by flopsquad · · Score: 1

      Your post also reminds me, I seem to recall a story from around the dawn of rail transportation. IIRC it was "mathematically proven" that humans could not physically withstand travel at speeds above ~50mph—causing you to melt or your face to fall off or organs to be forcefully ejected from your body. Anyone have a cite and more accurate retelling of this bit of apocrypha?

      --
      Nothing posted to /. has ever been legal advice, including this.
    18. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by datavirtue · · Score: 1

      You were obviously hangry when you wrote this.

      --
      I object to power without constructive purpose. --Spock
    19. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      "seems"

    20. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by PsychoSlashDot · · Score: 1

      Unfortunately, that is par for the course for the mainstream press, which lives on hyperbole, distortion and exaggeration. In fact, it is not too far-fetched to assert that the mainstream has been, for a long time now, moving from the news report business to the entertainment business.

      To be fair, as topics get more complicated, the issue of understanding becomes more a factor. Expecting reporters to be able to process, summarize, and relate a study/finding/report on banana blight or the consequences of a bad batch of sunscreen is reasonable. Expecting them to be able to make advanced biology, physics, math, economics or other hard sciences understandable in 5-minute stories... unreasonable.

      Too many topics require so much background to dimly understand them that it's almost impractical to try to report on them to the general populace.

      Remember, most of us Slashdot readers are highly technical people who tend as a generalization to expose ourselves to a breadth of technical topics, so we understand at least what areas out of our expertise are about. Quantum mechanics is hard for "us", but we've got a chance to recognize what we don't know. The general populace is much more screwed.

      I recall to mind a lengthy discussion with a relative, explaining the practical limitations of wireless signalling, specifically that there is only a limited spectrum that exists, and after all was said and done, his response was "they should make more". Not "they should reallocate spectrum more wisely", but literally "make more". No physics background.

      --
      "Oh no... he found the .sig setting."
    21. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Na, the chattering class knows you only need 97% to qualify as "proof".

    22. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      >man-made objects
      Uh, the ship of theseus is eternal, depending on your definitions. Grandpa's broom/axe, etc. This does invite doubt about what constitutes a "self", ie the experiment where you exchange one cell at a time, until you've traded "bodies".

      >perpetual motion laws
      Entropy isn't relevant, energy input is a given. Aging forever won't mean no food. Yes, that's a problem when you outlive the sun, but even if you DID outlive the heat death of the universe, there'd be nothing there, making existence moot.

    23. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by the_skywise · · Score: 1

      Sure, constant velocity in a non-gravitational vacuum is a basic given in astrophysics - but that's NOT a "perpetual motion machine". There's no energy transfer there. Now when that flying star hits another object and maintains its speed and direction gimme a call! (and note the star itself will likely die out and implode before that happens!)

    24. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Humans have a solution that works for them; it's called children. We just don't particularly like the solution.

    25. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Most people don't realize that math is 'purely' conceptual - you're going to blow their minds with this.

    26. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by dgatwood · · Score: 1

      194 proof, to be exact.

      --

      Check out my sci-fi/humor trilogy at PatriotsBooks.

    27. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by mark-t · · Score: 1

      My point was that it *IS* perpetual for all practical purposes. By the time it might run out, there wouldn't be anyone left in the universe to even observe what had happened.

    28. Re: Sigh, no they didn't by joao.cordeiro · · Score: 1

      It depends on what the study is actually talking about.
      If we replace we become defined as individuals by our brain structure, then we can be uploaded into a replaceable machine.(or even a clone).
      Then we will age for long periods of time with very quick resets. During those resets, we are not aging, making this article wrong.

    29. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      > If we live long enough we'll find a solution to aging.

      I see what you did there ;-)

    30. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Aighearach · · Score: 1

      Very few people consider a cloned plant to be the same individual. It has the same DNA, but it seems to be starting over and growing a new individual from a reproductive budding site; it uses its reproductive machinery to copy itself instead of for sexual reproduction.

      I know it makes a better story that way, but still.

    31. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I don't think there's any evidence that it's actually perpetual. There's some debate of whether or not it'll slow/reverse. All we know is it doesn't appear to have ever slowed or reversed since the big bang (which might juts be the last time it reversed form condensing into expanding).

      Also it's not "motion" in the relevant sense. You can't use it to do work. Not juts "we don't know how to tap it" there's no way to extract energy from it and every indication that if you somehow could you'd slow it down. Much like how a frictionless flywheel would spin forever, but without friction you can't make it do anything useful and if you did manage to make it do work somehow the process would slow and eventually stop the wheel.

    32. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Very few people consider a cloned plant to be the same individual.

      I guess I'm a very special snowflake then.

    33. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Argument from authority. Science has no authorities. Please, play again.

    34. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Ol+Olsoc · · Score: 1

      You are of course correct. I think they are using the wrong words "mathematical proof" when the accurate term is "extensive modelling."

      If by "extensive" you mean building the simplest possible model that some significant subset of the chattering class is willing to regard as credible for all of the five minutes it takes to seagull post and flit onto the next topic.

      Excellent work. Now the reader is equipped with a yellow flag that activates (one hopes) on next encounter with a similarly thumping article (subtype: da da da DAH!) beating the vapid drum that "it's the telomere, stupid!"

      Now well-equipped reader thinks, I once read a MOASH (mother of all stupid headlines) to the effect that merely fixing the telomeres lurks below the snake oil horizon.

      This is what hapless mayfly dredges out of his or her damp, woven basket promulgated as "proof".

      Appalling.

      Even the huddled yeast on this proof basket fail to thrive.

      Whoa dude, let's have a beer and relax.

      --
      The shepherds did so well protecting the flock that the sheep no longer believed that wolves existed.
    35. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by mark-t · · Score: 1

      I never suggested tapping into it wouldn't slow it down... but such a slowdown would likely be all but imperceptible on any scale that wasn't measured in orders of many tens of billions of years.

    36. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The moment news became reportable OTA it became entertainment all the way back when radio was invented, just look at war of the worlds, it was a news parody. Then at some point, video killed the radio star.

    37. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I have a mathematical proof that whoever wrote the headline is an idiot.

    38. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Hubble space expansion isn't constant velocity. It is galaxies continuing to accelerate away from each other, the acceleration results in a red-shift in the light that otherwise wouldn't be there.

    39. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Agent0013 · · Score: 1

      A stand of trees is often still connected underground though. So the differentiation between individual tree and part of a larger whole is more blurred.

      --

      -- ssoorrrryy,, dduupplleexx sswwiittcchh oonn.. -Quote found on actual fortune cookie.
    40. Re:Sigh, no they didn't by Aighearach · · Score: 1

      The difference between the actual individuals is hard to identify in the sense of drawing a line between two adjacent individuals with connected roots, sure. But that doesn't imply that it is hard to know that a clone is a different individual.

      Just like, conjoined twins might have a blurred line when it comes to looking at an individual cell in the body and telling which individual it is part of, maybe even both, and yet there might also be very little doubt that you have two distinct individuals.

  4. False Dichotomy by ScentCone · · Score: 5, Insightful

    So it's either aging or cancer? I don't buy it. Someone in their teens isn't aging (in way we're all talking about it), quite the opposite. But neither is their rapid renewal of useful stuff like cartilage, collagen, etc., blowing up as cancer for all of them. This mathematical proof that you can't have it both ways is based on a premise of there only being two ways. Something as complicated as a mammal body never operates in a one-way-or-another set of only two possibilities. We're the sum of many, many processes. There's room to tweak the nature and damage of aging skin, joints, brains, and hearts and thus mitigate some of the hardships of aging without assuming that it's only successful if we become beautiful young immortals.

    --
    Don't disappoint your bird dog. Go to the range.
    1. Re:False Dichotomy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Indeed, someone who has just been conceived (and consists of only a couple of cells) "isn't aging" either - in the way YOU want to talk about it. I fail to see how that is relevant, but then I'm pretty dense when someone isn't able to articulate their actual argument. I have no inclination to "read between the lines" and construct their argument for them. I do agree that - naturally - the summary isn't as nuanced as it 'should' be (it seems to be written for those (younger) teenagers of yours (- in fact, I wonder what the 'grade level' would be if I passed it through an evaluation program; I doubt it would reach 9th Grade...)). I also have a lot of doubts about the "proof" claim. I assume they constructed a system of axioms and (if correct) demonstrated that finite lifetime was a necessary result of those axioms. One of the interesting things is that this work attempts to work at (at least) two levels of complexity - the system we call 'a human being' and the individual cellular populations. I seem to recall that the estimate is that there are a couple of million chemical reactions going on in each cell each second. Given the number of cells we 'own', and given that many of these reactions are enzymatically catalyzed (hence subject to distributions of products (as well as a distribution of reactants)), errors WILL accumulate. AFAIK, we've yet to demonstrate a copy system that is 100.000000000000000000% accurate.
      But I do agree that any proof that "mathematicians" may construct will have little direct relationship to the real world.

    2. Re:False Dichotomy by sabbede · · Score: 1
      I'm not sure we are talking about the same thing with aging, and teenagers are still growing. And if an adult starts growing again, the result is an agonizing disaster as bones start trying to grow into each other. Despite all that, I think your point still holds. If nothing else, someone in their early 20's is done growing, not quite aging, and definitely not just a bag of cancer.

      The way I see it, at most we just have to make sure cells still get killed off when other cells need to replace them. If we're already keeping them artificially young, it shouldn't be that hard to artificially kill some off.

    3. Re:False Dichotomy by quintus_horatius · · Score: 2

      You were once the youngest organism on the planet. But at the same time you’re also as old as life itself, an unbroken line of cell divisions stretching back 3.5 billion years.

      Yes, it's a false dichotomy. We're programmed to grow old and die. Mice and Humboldt Squid live about the same amount of time, about two years. Humans, whales, and macaws live about the same amount of time, around a century. Your lifespan is neither determined by the size of your body or the speed at which you live. We all seem to age in the same ways - young and fresh, then adult, then old and frail.

      Your cellular lineage is ancient, so it's not something intrinsic to the matter making up the cells. What's left but the instructions encoded in the genes?

    4. Re: False Dichotomy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Its an attempt to model a proof with an either/or oversimplification amd seems sort of naive and assumptive for that journal. They refer to cancer as if we understand that phenomena completely in order to model a definitive 'proof'. If we understand the mathematics of cancer so well, why are we so bad at treating it? If aging is an effective counterbalance to cancer - what would the mechanics of long term cellular repair look like? Surey we are getting close enough to having nano technology affected at that scale. The entire format of this argument seems to stake a bold claim against those trying to innovate in this area such as Aubrey DeGray â" this article seems to make such a definitive case that it is not to be trusted. it is either political or naively arrogant or maybe a combination of both.

    5. Re:False Dichotomy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      So it's either aging or cancer? I don't buy it. Someone in their teens isn't aging (in way we're all talking about it), quite the opposite.

      That's where the problem is for many people who distinguish the words "growing" and "aging". To me, it is a misleading way of thought. Don't you think that "growing" is actually a part of "aging"? I guess, the definition that many people keep in their mind is that "growing" is to extend and "aging" is to decline. To me, growing is just the beginning of aging (go up and come down).

      In other words, it is the problem with word definition. Once one understands that growing is aging, then the one would understand why there are only 2 selected paths - either your cells die (aging) or they become cancer (immortal cells).

  5. Math is sometime incorrect by Pablopelos · · Score: 4, Insightful

    I remember for years the phrase was "mathematically a bumblebee can't fly". I hardly think we know all the nuances of cellular mechanics yet.

    1. Re:Math is sometime incorrect by OneHundredAndTen · · Score: 1

      I remember for years the phrase was "mathematically a bumblebee can't fly".

      That is a canard. At best, it was an utterance by an otherwise eminent scientist who happened to know very little about aerodynamics.

    2. Re:Math is sometime incorrect by NEDHead · · Score: 1

      Bumblebees have canards?

    3. Re:Math is sometime incorrect by Shotgun · · Score: 3, Funny

      The Burt's Bees do.

      --
      Aah, change is good. -- Rafiki
      Yeah, but it ain't easy. -- Simba
    4. Re:Math is sometime incorrect by Oswald+McWeany · · Score: 1

      I remember for years the phrase was "mathematically a bumblebee can't fly". I hardly think we know all the nuances of cellular mechanics yet.

      Bumblebees can't fly!

      If you look close enough they're all riding mini quadrocopter's; that's why they make so much noise as they fly.

      --
      "That's the way to do it" - Punch
    5. Re:Math is sometime incorrect by JonnyCalcutta · · Score: 1

      That's how they fly

  6. Bladerunner dialog by Hal_Porter · · Score: 2

    I always liked this bit of dialogue. It'd be more scientifically accurate if Batty had suggested telomerase and Tyrell had warned it would cause cancer. Or if Batty suggested stem cells and Tyrell mentioned teratomas. Still you can sort of live with that. What was interesting was that you get the impression that the four year lifespan isn't artificial crippling as is suggested earlier but it was the best Tyrell Corp could do. Or maybe Tyrell was bullshitting. Blade Runner being Blade Runner, either interpretation is possible.

    https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/...

    Roy: Had in mind something a little more radical.
    Tyrell: What..? What seems to be the problem?
    Roy: Death.
    Tyrell: Death. Well, I'm afraid that's a little out of my jurisdiction, you...
    Roy: I want more life, fucker (father).
    Tyrell: The facts of life: To make an alteration in the evolvement of an organic life system is fatal. A coding sequence cannot be revised once it's been established.
    Roy: Why not?
    Tyrell: Because by the second day of incubation, any cells that have undergone reversion mutations give rise to revertant colonies like rats leaving a sinking ship; then the ship sinks.
    Roy: What about EMS recombination?
    Tyrell: We've already tried it. Ethyl methane sulfonate is an alkylating agent and a potent mutagen. It created a virus so lethal the subject was dead before he left the table.
    Roy: Then a repressor protein that blocks the operating cells.
    Tyrell: Wouldn't obstruct replication, but it does give rise to an error in replication so that the newly formed DNA strand carries a mutation and you've got a virus again. But this - all of this is academic. You were made as well as we could make you.
    Roy: But not to last.
    Tyrell: The light that burns twice as bright burns half as long, and you have burned so very very brightly, Roy. Look at you. You're the prodigal son. You're quite a prize!
    Roy: I've done questionable things.
    Tyrell: Also extraordinary things. Revel in your time!
    Roy: Nothing the god of biomechanics wouldn't let you in heaven for. [kisses Tyrell and kills him]
    Roy: [to J. F. Sebastian] Sorry, Sebastian. [Sebastian panics] Come. Come.

    --
    echo -e 'global _start\n _start:\n mov eax, 2\n int 80h\n jmp _start' > a.asm; nasm a.asm -f elf; ld a.o -o a;
    1. Re: Bladerunner dialog by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Four years wasn't the best that they could do - it was a failsafe.

      Reverting the limit was the tricky bit.

  7. Ummm. ... jellyfish??? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Explain the grow-old-grow-young trick some jellyfish do.

    1. Re:Ummm. ... jellyfish??? by omnichad · · Score: 1

      It would be a lot more useful if you could keep your brain.

  8. Some sanity for once by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    No more of these articles claiming humans can live to be 1,000 years old...

  9. How To Look Stupid by Inviska · · Score: 5, Informative

    Making an absolute claim like this is always a great way to make yourself look stupid. I remember at university chips were currently being fabricated using a 24micron process and a lecturer claimed it would be impossible to go below 8microns (I may be getting the numbers wrong here) because it was below the physical wavelength of light. Nearly two decades later, here we are at 10nm with further process shrinkages planned.

    You could have claimed it was mathematically impossible to reduce the fabrication process further due to the wavelength of light, but that doesn't mean there aren't ways around problems. To claim something is impossible simply because you don't know the solution is a great way to make yourself look stupid in the future.

    1. Re:How To Look Stupid by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      "Shrinkage" isn't a word we use in polite company.

    2. Re:How To Look Stupid by apoc.famine · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Making an absolute claim like this is always a great way to make yourself look stupid.

      Which is why you only find this claim in the shit journalism that's trying to pander to a mainstream audience and not in the paper itself. I really wish I had millions of dollars, because I'd buy /., hire some competent people, and go right to the actual research rater than the sensational, misleading bullshit that is used to get ad-views.

      --
      Velociraptor = Distiraptor / Timeraptor
    3. Re:How To Look Stupid by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Build your own. Why wait to somehow get a million dollars when the building blocks are already in place? Go ask those guys at Soylent News... it may not be as big as Slashdot but the comments are better.

  10. Bye bye, Jellyfish by null+etc. · · Score: 4, Funny

    I guess immortal jellyfish will need to start dying off now, to satisfy this mathematician's proof.

    1. Re:Bye bye, Jellyfish by zifn4b · · Score: 1

      I guess immortal jellyfish will need to start dying off now, to satisfy this mathematician's proof.

      The Hydra as well. But to be fair, I believe they were referring specifically to human mortality.

      --
      We'll make great pets
    2. Re:Bye bye, Jellyfish by flink · · Score: 2

      They do it by reverting to an embryonic state.

      I guess if you don't mind being liquefied and having your cells induced to revert to stem cells and then growing a new clone human from there, you could consider yourself "immortal".

  11. Proven wrong by gchat · · Score: 2

    Well I guess nature has already proven them wrong:

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...

    TLDR:
    Turritopsis dohrnii, the immortal jellyfish, is a species of small, biologically immortal jellyfish found in the Mediterranean Sea and in the waters of Japan...
    It does this through the cell development process of transdifferentiation, which alters the differentiated state of the cells and transforms them into new types of cells.

  12. hypothesis by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

    That's the key word "hypothesis".

    The mechanisms of aging are not understood and therefore, anything they may have discovered is most likely horseshit.

    The only thing I see that's of any interest in the study is possible mathematical methods for simulations.

  13. Counterexample by jgullstr · · Score: 2

    The immortal jellyfish begs to differ.

    1. Re:Counterexample by alvinrod · · Score: 1

      Everything ages. That's just part of drifting through time. The real trick is, like that jellyfish, not dying as a result of that aging.

  14. Entropy by Puff_Of_Hot_Air · · Score: 1

    It's not really new this, what would be more helpful is if we could calculate an upper bound on a human lifespan based on the network size, damage/repair rates or what have you. Of course, being able to extend human life (if it's resource intensive), will lead to the mother of all inequality blow outs. At any rate replication is the only path to significant time span existence, and digital looks like the only way to do that with some preservation of an "I". It's time to relinquish your flesh!

    1. Re:Entropy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      First, we remove the subject's brain (as its connections are far too complex for use to deal with now, and will continue to be so for dozens of decades yet). Then his/her genitals, then ....oh sure some may object and claim that what's left is not human, but then again who cares about such philosophical nonsense?

    2. Re:Entropy by Kierthos · · Score: 1

      I doubt we'll see digital transfer of consciousness in my lifetime. Don't get me wrong, the idea appeals to me on a certain level, but even given the existence of such technology at some future date, how do you prove that consciousness was transferred rather than just some form of duplication?

      Am I just my memories? If so, then assuming the existence of technology to read my brain, then yes, then it would follow that consciousness could be transferred and/or duplicated. But if there's some part of consciousness beyond that?

      But sure, let's say, at some point in the future... 20 years, 50 years, 100 years from now, whenever... such transfers or uploading or whatever it's called is perfected.

      Is a digital consciousness human? Does it have all the rights and responsibilities thereof? I mean, clearly, it doesn't need to eat and drink any more, but it would still require resources to maintain the platform that the consciousness is stored on. Can it vote? Can it hold property? Will this only be a process available to the rich and powerful? (Okay, I already know the answer to that one... yes.)

      Again, the idea of living forever as a digital consciousness appeals to me. But would I still be me? Or am I an approximate simulation of myself, without the capability for growth and change? I'm not sure I'd want immortality if it involved such stasis....

      --
      Mr. Hu is not a ninja.
    3. Re:Entropy by nickersonm · · Score: 1

      I doubt we'll see digital transfer of consciousness in my lifetime. Don't get me wrong, the idea appeals to me on a certain level, but even given the existence of such technology at some future date, how do you prove that consciousness was transferred rather than just some form of duplication?

      Ideally via a Ship of Theseus type method, slowly expanding a biological mind into the digital domain, running on both substrates for a while, and slowly shutting down the biological portion (as it naturally ages and dies, even?).

      A faster yet still gradual route would be individually replacing neurons and killing them off once they're successfully emulated, as featured in multiple SF formats.

  15. University of Arizona by 110010001000 · · Score: 1

    Um, no offense, but University of Arizona? The only things they are good at is basketball and tapping beer kegs.

  16. This is a very limited result by Baron_Yam · · Score: 4, Informative

    They've shown mathematical proof that one particular concept for defeating the symptoms of aging won't work.

    Obviously, no matter what you do eventually entropy wins... but there's no law of physics of which I'm aware that shows you can't re-engineer biology from scratch to make it much more entropy-resistant.

    It's just really, really, really difficult. However, we already have examples of organisms that are highly cancer resistant, and others that live extremely long lives compared to ours, so we know even without a fundamental re-engineering there's a lot of room for improvement just copying what already exists in nature.

    1. Re:This is a very limited result by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Obviously, no matter what you do eventually entropy wins... but there's no law of physics of which I'm aware that shows you can't re-engineer biology from scratch to make it much more entropy-resistant.

      Eventually the universe as a whole runs out of entropy (more precisely, free energy). But, until then, you can take the entropy from elsewhere in the universe and use it to keep on living.

  17. That's funny by burtosis · · Score: 1
  18. No, that's not proof by tietokone-olmi · · Score: 1

    That's a mathematical argument. Those always take the form of a proof; otherwise they're a priori bunk.

    The next step is review, and seeing if papers that cite this one appear. If review finds the proof broken, or the proof is such that it leads nowhere (i.e. there's no citations), then we can say that the argument is bunk. Until then nothing has been "proven".

    1. Re:No, that's not proof by Immerman · · Score: 1

      Plus, the whole "mathematical proof" thing automatically means it doesn't apply to the real world.

      All a mathematical proof does is prove that X is an inherent implication of the axioms (assumptions) used to define a conceptual space. In math that's fine as the base axioms are (mostly) *extremely* rudimentary assumptions outlining the foundation of counting, geometry, etc. Even in physics - we've got a pretty good (though known flawed) set of mathematically expressed axioms (aka Scientific Laws and Theories), so mathematical proofs are (usually) relevant to the real world- though it's still the places where they break down that are the most interesting to study.

      As soon as you try to make something applicable to biology though... well we're still just barely beginning to understand how that really works, and so at best our axioms are nothing but crude oversimplifications of reality, and our proofs largely worthless except as conceptual sanity checks to figure out where the axioms are flawed - i.e. every time you find scientific evidence of something that you've "proved" impossible, you can get a better idea which axioms are flawed, and how.

      In this case we already know that some species are immortal, and that substantial artificial life extension is possible (someone manage to halve or more the aging speed of.... flatworms(?) several years ago) - therefore their mathematical proof has already been proven inapplicable to reality, and its only value is in helping to determine which of their axioms are flawed.

      --
      --- Most topics have many sides worth arguing, allow me to take one opposite you.
    2. Re:No, that's not proof by tietokone-olmi · · Score: 1

      >proven inapplicable to reality,

      Well, maybe not so much inapplicable to reality as divergent from it. Empirically anyway... bane of applied mathematicians everywhere.

    3. Re:No, that's not proof by Immerman · · Score: 1

      Yes, divergent is a better word. And when a (valid) proof diverges from reality, you know the divergence is inherent in at least one of your axioms.

      A favorite quote:
      As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain, and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality. -- Albert Einstein

      --
      --- Most topics have many sides worth arguing, allow me to take one opposite you.
  19. Who wants to live forever anyway? by zifn4b · · Score: 1

    On a lot of days, I am thankful that life doesn't last forever because it means that dealing with the collective madness of humanity is temporary. Who would want to live forever with that? I mean if you look at life objectively, what is the primary source of psychological suffering for you? I guarantee it's either your own actions or the actions of other human beings. Once you correct your actions, you're left with the others you can't control. We are greedy, manipulative and frequently sadistic because we only care about our own self interest. Nature is not perfect but far less negative than humanity. On occasion, with nature there are some unpleasant things like colds, winter weather, critters eating into your dwelling but nature, even a natural disaster every now and then is by far the minority of annoyances of life. A rainy day is nothing compared to a selfish, malevolent human being.

    This reminds me of the song Eclipse by Pink Floyd:

    All that you touch
    And all that you see
    All that you taste
    All you feel

    And all that you love
    And all that you hate
    All you distrust
    All you save

    And all that you give
    And all that you deal
    And all that you buy,
    Beg, borrow or steal

    And all you create
    And all you destroy
    And all that you do
    And all that you say

    And all that you eat
    And everyone you meet
    And all that you slight
    And everyone you fight

    And all that is now
    And all that is gone
    And all that's to come
    And everything under the sun is in tune
    But the sun is eclipsed by the moon.

    --
    We'll make great pets
    1. Re:Who wants to live forever anyway? by 110010001000 · · Score: 1

      Primitive man would disagree. The elements and disease killed many more than other humans ever did.

    2. Re:Who wants to live forever anyway? by millertym · · Score: 3, Insightful

      I get what you are saying, but to think like that in absolute terms is to ignore the billions of positive selfless acts that also happen each day among humanity.

      Our civilization could not exist in the complex way it does without MOST members of the race USUALLY behaving in ways that involve friendship, love, kindness, and selflessness.

      We all have a selfish animal side existing inside of us. But we also have the thinking side that has allowed humanity as a whole to continue on despite the animal side.

      I believe the next 100 years will be absolute critical on if our path as a race leads us as a race toward extinction or some kind of 'beyond physical body' immortality.

    3. Re:Who wants to live forever anyway? by zifn4b · · Score: 1

      I get what you are saying, but to think like that in absolute terms is to ignore the billions of positive selfless acts that also happen each day among humanity.

      It doesn't matter how many selfless acts go on. It matters how people measure their overall quality of life. How do you measure it? Do you measure it like the OECD or some other means? We have Gallup polls and the OECD the demonstrate quite frankly that we need improvement in a variety of areas, not little improvement, BIG improvement. When you see record numbers of people on anti-depressant and anti-anxiety medication, you can conclude we don't live in anything remotely close to a utopia.

      Let me put this in perspective for you, I'm going to pick a random example of something so negative that it's beyond belief. Fundamentalist Religion. Using psychology programming and fear tactics to make you terrified of something that isn't real. That's awful. And that's just ONE example.

      --
      We'll make great pets
    4. Re:Who wants to live forever anyway? by zifn4b · · Score: 1

      Primitive man would disagree. The elements and disease killed many more than other humans ever did.

      Yes, I'm aware of ancient history and this is quite true. However, it is also true that we have found many tools available to make our lives better in this regard. Immunizations, Pasteurization, Refrigeration and all sorts of other things. That still means nature is much better than the self inflicted nonsense that humans inflict on themselves. I mean we have a crazy guy in North Korea that if he could, he would nuke the entire planet so he can "rule the world". That's far more perverse than anything else in nature.

      --
      We'll make great pets
    5. Re:Who wants to live forever anyway? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      That, and almost all social progress that ever happened, happened because old people died.

    6. Re:Who wants to live forever anyway? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      nature doesn't care, it destroys with impunity and without regard, somewhat like the man in North Korea, except without consciousness.

      one day, perhaps not so far down the road (who really knows), a large rocky mass floating in space (or a too close massive gamma ray burst, or any of a myriad of happenings in the universe) created by "nature" could destroy this world and every living thing on it.

      we, being some sentient beings who can actually care, COULD take measures to stop that from happening, if we work towards that outcome.

      "nature" will not do so , and could care less.

      we're actually organized life's only hope in the long run.. at least as far as we know right now (haven't talked to any alien sentience as yet. )

  20. Impossible is a big word by CptLoRes · · Score: 2

    Proving that the current favorite method for trying to stop ageing is infeasible, is not the same as saying stopping aging is impossible. Human flight was impossible Wright up until the moment it was not (phun intended).

  21. Don't be that guy. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I bet your fun at partys.

    1. Re:Don't be that guy. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      You make bets on his fun at parties?

  22. Please someone keep the link at hand by hcs_$reboot · · Score: 1

    we'll use it in a few years when the exact opposite article (aging might be stopped) is released.

    --
    Slashdot, fix the reply notifications... You won't get away with it...
  23. How did this garbage make it to /. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Fake news.

  24. Uhh by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Nature only cares that a life form last long enough to produce/take care of offspring. Once that is done, who cares if you last for another 5 minutes.

    1. Re:Uhh by Immerman · · Score: 1

      That depends - are you capable of having more offspring? Are you capable of helping your grandchildren prosper?

      A more accurate statement would be "Evolution only cares about how many descendants you have."

      --
      --- Most topics have many sides worth arguing, allow me to take one opposite you.
  25. Not even close to accurate by TimothyHollins · · Score: 4, Insightful

    This is why we don't invite mathematicians to parties.

    These guys have absolutely no clue what the hell they're on about. They start out grossly misunderstanding how aging works and what its role in biology is, then go on to grossly misunderstand how cancer is generated. Then they grossly misunderstand how replication works, followed by grossly misunderstanding evolution (strong enough? Who at a university+ level would say something like that?).

    Any freshman biologist can answer all these questions easily.

    Aging is the result of a) your body adapting to its current needs (growing, reproduction etc) and b) your genetic material accumulating errors from the replication used to build new cells. This is not a theory, this is not "controversial", this has been the settled conclusion for a long time. If the mathematicians at Arizona can't pick up a textbook...

    The carcinogenesis process is also well understood (though there are many details, such as the newfound roles of both micro- and lnc- RNA, that are still a mystery).
    There are X number of established ways, all involving knocking out tumor-preventing pathways or hyper-activating growth pathways. It is not a result of aging, but of the previously mentioned genetic errors that come with replication + plus external factors that may play some role (infection with HR-HPV is considered a requirement for cervical cancer, and plays a major role in some other cancers including penile, vulvar, anal, head, and neck). If it were a result of aging, or if cells got "hyper-competitive" later down the road, we wouldn't see kids with leukemia, nor teenagers with melanoma (from tanning all day long, something that causes massive buildup of genetic errors in the skin cells).

    Our cells never actually wind down. They do the best they can with the resources they are given. As our machinery accrues more and more faults over the years, the functionality deteriorates. Just like an 8 year old computer will have some problems and some 'ticks', so too will cells based on old DNA. But there is no in-built wind-down parameter, there is no "give-up and die" gene.
    At most we have something called telomeres attached to our chromosomes that tells us how many times the chromosome has been replicated, giving an indicator of how "reliable" the chromosome DNA is. Extending the telomeres leads them to be used for longer. This allows more errors to accrue in the chromosome, which increases the risk of a cancer blocking pathway on the chromosome to be knocked out. Hence, if you want to live forever, you have to both extend the telomere as well as prevent replication errors.

    And to answer the final (ridiculous) assertion -

    But this model of aging adds a new element to the existing hypothesis -- even if evolution did select for eternal youth, competition inside our own bodies would see us to an inevitable grave. /quote

    There is only "competition" inside the body when something has already gone horribly wrong. There are more than 10 "anti-compete clause" pathways active in each cell. If a cell "competes", it will receive an apoptosis signal to commit suicide, and it will be destroyed by the body's own immune system. It is only when these anti-compete pathways have been destroyed already that any classic evolution-based competition can occur.

    In short, these guys really should have asked a biologist before spouting nonsense.

    1. Re:Not even close to accurate by Immerman · · Score: 1

      Hey, don't blame the mathematicians - they mostly understand the limitations of their art. From the article:
      "Ageing is mathematically inevitable – like, seriously inevitable," says evolutionary biologist Joanna Masel.

      This is a biologist making the claim. And biologists are notoriously bad at understanding the actual implications of math, almost as bad as doctors.

      --
      --- Most topics have many sides worth arguing, allow me to take one opposite you.
    2. Re:Not even close to accurate by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      This is why we don't invite slashdot readers to parties. Time and time again they mistake the summary for the article.

  26. You cant stop or reverse time by DirkDaring · · Score: 1

    Mathematical proof you can't stop aging. Can I post it in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences?

  27. Yeah, but... by FormOfActionBanana · · Score: 1
    --
    Take off every 'sig' !!
  28. Which Paul Nelson? by Idou · · Score: 1

    I had some discussion points I was going to post (including this reference), and then I came across this wiki entry.

    Can anyone confirm or deny if this "Paul Nelson" is the same "young earth creationist" described in the above wiki entry or is he an actual scientist with a very unfortunate name?

    --
    Sdelat' Ameriku velikoy Snova!
    1. Re:Which Paul Nelson? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Department of Ecology and Evolutionary Biology, University of Arizona

      Probably not the same guy.

  29. the myth that theoretically bumblebees can't fly by XXongo · · Score: 3, Informative

    I remember for years the phrase was "mathematically a bumblebee can't fly".

    Well, that myth that theoretically a bumble bee can't fly is mostly a myth, you know.

    Here's a longer explanation of where the myth comes from: http://www.abc.net.au/science/...

  30. Mathematical proof? by LostMyBeaver · · Score: 1

    So... are we ignoring mathematical or proof?

    All I see from this research is a reasonable hypothesis that there is another important variable to consider. I couldn't see anything that looked like mathematical proof of anything.

    Mathematical proof requires :
        a) There is proven math
        b) It is used to prove a hypothesis

    Then there's the issue that we barely have a clue what's happening within a cell. So far as I know there are statistics we use to justify our beliefs of how cellular functions occur, but that's basically saying "If we roll the dice 2000 times, 1990 times, it's the same". Maybe 2000/2000 like "If we microwave a cell, it stops functioning after 10 seconds"... except with Cockroaches... we can't kill them by nuking them.

    With regards to the functions of a human body, using the term mathematical proof is horrifying.

    In the future we should write "A scientist hypothesizes with what appears to be logical reasoning based on the very little we understand cellular biology that anti-aging may be impossible if we don't also account for other poorly understood and possibly previously not considered variables."

  31. Has anyone told California? by kansas_plainsman · · Score: 1

    There will be riots. :-)

  32. Well... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    ...they obvously dont know Catherine Zeta-Jones...

  33. Complete Bullshit by gweihir · · Score: 1

    You cannot "mathematically" prove anything about physical reality. It is just not possible. There are always 2 translation steps and these always introduce errors. Hence to claim that this was "mathematically prove" is just a lie, intended to make it sound absolute. It is not.

    --
    Most ACs are not even worth the keystrokes to insult them. Be generically insulted by this and ignored otherwise.
  34. Here's an anti-aging secret for men... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    If you want to look younger for your next IT job interview, use Olay Regenerist Micro-Sculpting Cream Face Moisturizer to keep your face looking younger than your body.

  35. Living forever is not mathematically possible by sinij · · Score: 1

    Living forever is not mathematically possible according to prevailing cosmic expansion-contraction model. When Universe finally collapses, time ceases to exist. So we will have to settle for simply living very long time no matter what.

    However, the model in this article does not put limitations on longevity. It simply outlines one mechanism of eventual demise, without even putting a number of that eventual.

    So if my choices to live about 100 years naturally, or 1000 years and eventually die from cancer... I know I will pick cancer.

    1. Re:Living forever is not mathematically possible by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      So if my choices to live about 100 years naturally, or 1000 years and eventually die from cancer... I know I will pick cancer.

      You might have all the treatments for a 1000 year lifespan, then the next day a muslim blows you up

    2. Re:Living forever is not mathematically possible by sinij · · Score: 1

      Since I have functional understanding of risk assessment, I am much more concerned about being killed in traffic.

  36. Old news by barbariccow · · Score: 1

    I know we sometimes post old stories here on slashdot, but really we knew about this in 1961... https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...

  37. This really pissed off Roy Batty by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    But then again Tyrell's glasses were indeed horrible.

  38. Nonsense article with a click-bait title by Futurepower(R) · · Score: 1

    "You cannot give a mathematical proof of something in the physical world. At most, you can give a mathematical proof that something is true in some model of the physical world."

    Thanks for saying that. This Slashdot story is about a nonsense article with a click-bait title.

    Any theoretical model of biochemical aging must include all facts that have already been gathered, such as these:

    Longest-living animal species

    400-year-old Greenland shark 'longest-living vertebrate'

    Longest-living mammal: Bowhead whale. Quote: "... over 200 years."

  39. What about controlling cancer and/or nanotech? by Khopesh · · Score: 1

    I think this study may have been too bounded by what we currently know and see as limits.

    Perhaps once we better understand cancer, it will be the key to making this all work; a "mild" and controlled cancer might solve the cell regeneration issue, especially if coaxed by nano-scale machines, which present another possibility: replacing and/or supplementing the failing parts of our bodies. Theoretically, a very careful balance of repaired telomeres, nanotech-supplemented systems, and controlled cancers could establish an equilibrium that would buy enough time for us to come up with another form of immortality (mind transference, fully artificial cells, or something more fantastical and yet to be imagined). You can't really disprove that with math since there are too many variables and suppositions.

    (We are the borg?)

    --
    Use my userscript to add story images to Slashdot. There's no going back.
    1. Re:What about controlling cancer and/or nanotech? by Lord+Kano · · Score: 1

      I too remain convinced that nanotech provides the only possibility we have of stopping aging.

      There's no other way to physically repair the DNA.

      LK

      --
      "Hi. This is my friend, Jack Shit, and you don't know him." - Lord Kano
  40. Kenny Rogers by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Scientists Have Mathematical Proof That It's Impossible To Stop Aging

    Apparently scientists have never studied Kenny Rogers.

  41. Well... by Gilgaron · · Score: 1

    With sufficiently advanced cancer treatments you wouldn't have to worry about the downside. You might need nanobots or a periodic cyberknife style cancer eradication but it'd be doable.

  42. Where have we heard this kind of thing before? by sycodon · · Score: 1

    What was that guy's name?

    Lord...

    Lord Kelvin, or something like that?

    --
    When Fascism comes to America, it will call itself Anti-Fascism, and tell you to give up your guns.
  43. In what sense are any jellyfish immortal? by CrankyOldEngineer · · Score: 1

    Jellyfish have no brain; or even a central nervous system. They are essentially a colony of specialize cells and are certainly not sentient. So they are immortal only in the sense that the colony lives on. Big deal!

    --
    COE
  44. Yeah, if you're just killing cells by Script+Cat · · Score: 1

    This does not speak to reintroducing engineered, properly functioning cells.

    1. Re:Yeah, if you're just killing cells by hyphnos · · Score: 1

      This does not speak to reintroducing engineered, properly functioning cells.

      Thank you! Or the repair/reversion to a more functional state of aging cells. Or nanotech repair of cells. Or introducing new stem cells from clones or donor cells. Or..... All they "proved" is what anyone can note by observation. In the native state without technological intervention, human beings will either die or die of cancer. Duh.

  45. trivialities by Goldsmith · · Score: 1

    When you simplify a cell to something that has a positive and negative output to the overall organism, and add in an effect that increases the amount of negative output over time, you're going to find (surprise, surprise!) that aging "is a fundamental feature of multicellular life." That's not a conclusion, that's an assumption you've made at the start of your study!

    To be fair, the authors of the study do cite two 50 to 60 year old papers discussing the (pre-modern-genetics) theory of aging that they are out to debunk.

  46. Evolution doesn't work like that by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    If replicating biology is good enough to continue for generations, why do our own cells wind down after just a few decades? A simple answer is evolution isn't strong enough to weed out genes that only cause us grief after we've popped out a few offspring.

    Evolution improves *the species*, not the individual. Perhaps older organisms winding down, dying, and get replaced by younger organisms has benefits for the species as a whole.

  47. Well, they have a mathematical proof... by DivineKnight · · Score: 1

    Well, they have a mathematical proof, and you know what Feynman says about scientists who rely solely on mathematical proofs: prove it! Real world, now.

  48. No ****, Sherlock by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    We have known this for a very long time. It is only millrnnials that like to pretend nothing has been discovered because they are bent that they don't get to be 'first' and therefore 'special'. The same holds true for many other scientific truths. Imagine how annoying it is for the rest of us, who could actually impart knowledge and save you from the retread (thereby freeing you for your own exploration) to watch you discover your navels and then gaze at them unceasingly, over and over and over again.

  49. Let's hope they don't tell the lobsters by nospam007 · · Score: 1

    Because they for sure don't know that.

  50. Their proof is non-existent and I can prove it by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I happen to have a proof right here in my lab coat pocket that mathematically proves their proof does not exist.

    Mathematical proofs are NEVER wroing, I mean wrong, so there! Shut up. AC OUT!

  51. Life is Paradox is Spirit Unbounded by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Life did not begin with Biology;
    Life will not end with Biology;
    Biology is simply how Life manifests,
    in the Here and Now.

    There is Life Beyond Biology.
    for when beings are ready
    to open their tiny minds.

    1. Re:Life is Paradox is Spirit Unbounded by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Life begins with a booty call.

  52. Replacement by mysidia · · Score: 1

    is a number of cells start to populate like there's no tomorrow, reproducing in uncontrolled ways that look too close to cancer for comfort. According to the researchers, this means we're damned either way.

    So destroy those cells and bulk-replace them with younger cells that were pre-created in a different vat where they didn't have to compete.

  53. Wronger than wrong by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    When people thought the Earth was flat, they were wrong. When people thought the Earth was spherical, they were wrong. But if you think that thinking the Earth is spherical is just as wrong as thinking the Earth is flat, then your view is wronger than both of them put together.

    --Isaac Asimov

  54. This would be the FIRST proof in all of science by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I haven't RTFA but I did read the healine, and if this is true, it's an amazing first.

    Nothing has ever been proven in science. Even gravity, evolution, and covalent bonding are still just theories. If someone has proven something, then there is no doubt that we are entering a completely new era of science.

    And it's fascinating that the first proof was something so specialized and narrow. But I suppose we should accept that the trailblazer who invented the first scientific proof happened to have specific interests, so he applied the new technique to aging. Einstein was interested in physics, so we saw his efforts used in physics. This math guy was interested in aging, so the first scientific proof happened to be about aging. Deal with it.

    I'm distured to have thought of a second alternative, though. What if the headline is stupid bullshit, written by some retarded person who doesn't know what science is?

    That would actually explain everything.

    Shit. I hope I don't have to RTFA.

  55. I want more life, father by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    What about EMS-3 recombination?

  56. Water Hydra do not age by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    The fresh-water animals belonging to the genus Hydra do not undergo senescence. This suggests there is no physical law prohibiting indefinite repair at the cellular level.

  57. YAY Cancer!! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    extending telomere or limiting telomerase effect (the proteine in charge or reducing telomere) , will increase the "photocopy" effect of cells , i.e everytime a cell replicate (until no more telomere and the dna come undone) it induces "errors" in the copy up until it replicates out of control , this is called cancer , so yeah IMHO real smart move

  58. not listening by micahraleigh · · Score: 1

    There's a case that enabling onco genes just gives people cancer and disabling them causes people to die quickly.

    But since this is slashdot where everything is seen through the eyes of government euthenizing everyone and taking their money to help DC fat cats get fatter, I'm not giving much benefit of the doubt that they factored in all avenues here.

  59. Thank you for this. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    There's barely a thing that can make me as angry, as people stating that there is such a thing as real-world "proof".

    We have statistically-6-sigma double-blind studies and data sets, repeated by a hundred groups of scientists... But a single contradicting observation can make it all come down.
    Because it's not about "proof". It's about usefulness.
    If we have predictions, and enough observations that we can rely on them, then that's useful, so we can predict the future, and hence alter our environment, to approach our goals.
    At no point in this entire deal, does the word "proof" even appear.

    And even worse, when people state that mathematics doesn't build on reality, and doesn't need to either, but that reality builds on mathematics! That's full-on hard schizophrenia there! Religious cult level schizophrenia!

    Mathematics is such a great thing. But this religious side of it, that some people make out of it, is horrifying.

  60. Physicians too. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    The number of times I've heard "It's incurable", when really, they meant "We don't know how to cure it. Currently!" or even just "I don't know how to cure it. Because I didn't even look into it.", is horrifying.

  61. The subject is completely irrelevant anyway by Rick+Schumann · · Score: 1

    Who the bloody hell wants to live forever, anyway? That would mean and eternity putting up with other people's shit that drives you more and more crazy decade after decade, except then it'd be forever. Quality of life > quantity of life.

    1. Re:The subject is completely irrelevant anyway by eaglesrule · · Score: 1

      Setting aside the example of Tithonus in greek mythology, it boils down to a matter of choice.

      The choice to live, or to die, on any particular day as opposed to being at the mercy of nature. Maybe I'd get bored after only a few millennia, but that's a risk I'd like to take.

  62. Does that mean capitalism harms progress? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    There is only "competition" inside the body when something has already gone horribly wrong. There are more than 10 "anti-compete clause" pathways active in each cell. If a cell "competes", it will receive an apoptosis signal to commit suicide, and it will be destroyed by the body's own immune system. It is only when these anti-compete pathways have been destroyed already that any classic evolution-based competition can occur.

    So we can only form a working organized humanity as a whole, by having a load of anti-compete clauses that prevent ourselved from eating each other? Aka social behavior. Together instead of against each other.
    Sounds to me, like the opposite of everything that is western-style capitalism.

    And just because I know, there's gonna be some knee-jerking jerks: No, that doesn't mean I'm advocating whatever you believe to be "the opposite" of that. Stop thinking in one-dimensional statice hyperpolarized binary us-vs-them extremes! I'm not your enemy, nor do I intend to be! I want you just as much to be happy and free than myself. I don't do compromises, nor unfairness. The only thing I maybe irrationally hold dearly, is that little limitation to one's freedom, that is the freedom to take away the freedom of others. And the only legitimate reaction, to me, is the separation of the parties that disagree over such things. That's it.

  63. Proving your approach is a nonstarter by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Is not proof that something is impossible. This is only evidence the way you propose to go about it won't work.

    You could for example invent more reliable replication machinery that did a better job of not propagating errors and incorporate it into new people or apply to existing people via retro-virus.

  64. ignorant of biology - immortal organisms by iggymanz · · Score: 1

    there are plenty of multicellular organisms that are essentially immortal (no set lifespan) except for accident, predation or disease

  65. Mathematical proof. *Sigh* by Chas · · Score: 1

    No. It merely means that using natural methods, and the science we have RIGHT NOW, there's no way to control the aging process without paving the way to cancer. Mostly because there's no currently feasible way to control trillions of differentiated cells in an ongoing, medically safe basis.

    That doesn't mean that, 100+ years down the road that SOMEONE won't perfect a way to do so.

    --


    Chas - The one, the only.
    THANK GOD!!!
  66. Not very Jelly by gx5000 · · Score: 1

    SO we need to changes ourselves into Immortal Jellyfish then.
    Kind if a Dr Who redo...is that what you're saying?

    --
    End of Line.
  67. fucking yellow science journalists by Khashishi · · Score: 1

    Can somebody shoot the journalists and then read the PNAS article and report on what it really says?

  68. You can't prove anything in biology by quax · · Score: 1

    This has been hyped and distorted to a ridiculous degree
    by pop science journos.

    Proofs only work for pure math.

    These researchers simply proved a theorem in their model which IMHO does not look very biological to begin with.

  69. more junk science by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    These phoney researchers are pretending they can model something they do not even understand and then, having assigned quasi-arbitrary values to variables in equations they pulled from their own posteriors, they pretend they obtained precise numerical results and that those results were in any way tethered to something in the real world.

    Total crap.

    Let me know when they can prove they understand ALL details of how an individual cell operates all the way down to the atomic level. Then let me know when thye know how all the different types of cells operate with the same level of precision and how they interact with eachother. Then let me know when they fully understand how all the systems built from all those types of cells work. At that point, all forms of disease and injury and mutation will be 100% understood and repairable -- and THEN they will be able to claim they can map some equations to any of this and have verifiable mathematical proofs. Until then, these people are jst shovelling bull excrement and engaging in garbage academic paper publishing.