In regards to your thoughtlesss, callous, and most disgraceful post with intent to hurt a Japanese child, I have taken the liberty of submitting a report on your actions to my employer, Network Associates Inc. Your internet access shall be canceled and you shall be arrested tomorrow morning at the origin of where you published this most vile act; your halfway house in San Francisco. Any and all parcels includeded within your computer to establish your computing ability will be seized by local authorities and any software shall also be contained with your computer. If you would like to express your 6th ammendment right, of which you have waivered in your agreement to use the internet, please express your concern to my eMail address via netw0rkassh0liates@yahoo.comThankyou.
Dear Anonymous Coward(aka "Jim Little" of RedMond, Washington),
On behalf of the Employment Development Department of Network Associates, I, Bob Ankist, have notified Microsoft Corp of your recent post on the "Slashdot forums" as being most unusual and of great risk to Microsoft and its current market share of Embeded Software. Your message placed upon the "Slashdot forums" has implied Microsoft and its Commercial Marketing team in a state of panic due to your aggregate Anti-Linux document you placed on microsoft.com; a risk on Microsoft's technical support and service division. We understand your opinion stated in the "Slashdot forums" was placed in essence of free speech and in hopes of marketing to these constitutional peasants, we find it peculiar of your development position at Microsoft and you to participate in such a way without Microsoft Corp's and Network Associate Inc's consent. Therefore it is my duty to assist Microsoft in reviewing your state of employment at Microsoft Corp because you have violated our don't-ask-don't-tell-customer policy of Linux' having any such status and market share in the Embeded Software market and of you implying a most unwarranted concern by stating Linux is "...crap." You have been notified and we urge you to reconsider your current stance of Linux not being a threat and ascertain that Linux must be discouraged in the market using the most sincere and most unchallenging methods. My heart goes out to you in light of your actions and I pray to the God of Healthiness that you seek and find a cure for your disease.
We have have been reviewing our network usage policy contract within your account and have discovered a violation of your service. You have transmitted information across our networks with intention of slandering our hard-working staff and creditors. Mr/Mrs. Anonymous Cowheard, we find it unacceptible, calous, and most certainly ill-tempered to accuse Network Associates of utilizing "moles" and "payoffs" of individuals outside of Network Associates to steal your most trusted and secure data. Please take measures on your behalf to prevent such communication from moving across our networks and we will continue your service. You are on notice and your conspirator, pater@slashdot.org, has been notified equally. Thankyou for your time.
It has come to our most desirable attention that your spacecraft is utilizing our most powerful communication technology across our networks and your service cost has yet to be reviewed. If you are aware of your contract with Network Associates, please contact our esteemed financial assistant to discuss a better suited payment plan for your financial situation or discontinue using our service. Failing to comply with this notice will result in repossesion of our property and your property shall be placed under lien. Your space vehicle is currently outside our solar system and upon reentry to Earth's atmosphere we will seize its use until we, Network Associates, has been accounted. Thankyou.
Slashdot Mirror
Dear unkind sir,
    In regards to your thoughtlesss, callous, and most disgraceful post with intent to hurt a Japanese child, I have taken the liberty of submitting a report on your actions to my employer, Network Associates Inc. Your internet access shall be canceled and you shall be arrested tomorrow morning at the origin of where you published this most vile act; your halfway house in San Francisco. Any and all parcels includeded within your computer to establish your computing ability will be seized by local authorities and any software shall also be contained with your computer. If you would like to express your 6th ammendment right, of which you have waivered in your agreement to use the internet, please express your concern to my eMail address via netw0rkassh0liates@yahoo.comThankyou.
Sincerely,
Bob Thurstin
On behalf of the Employment Development Department of Network Associates, I, Bob Ankist, have notified Microsoft Corp of your recent post on the "Slashdot forums" as being most unusual and of great risk to Microsoft and its current market share of Embeded Software. Your message placed upon the "Slashdot forums" has implied Microsoft and its Commercial Marketing team in a state of panic due to your aggregate Anti-Linux document you placed on microsoft.com; a risk on Microsoft's technical support and service division. We understand your opinion stated in the "Slashdot forums" was placed in essence of free speech and in hopes of marketing to these constitutional peasants, we find it peculiar of your development position at Microsoft and you to participate in such a way without Microsoft Corp's and Network Associate Inc's consent. Therefore it is my duty to assist Microsoft in reviewing your state of employment at Microsoft Corp because you have violated our don't-ask-don't-tell-customer policy of Linux' having any such status and market share in the Embeded Software market and of you implying a most unwarranted concern by stating Linux is "...crap." You have been notified and we urge you to reconsider your current stance of Linux not being a threat and ascertain that Linux must be discouraged in the market using the most sincere and most unchallenging methods. My heart goes out to you in light of your actions and I pray to the God of Healthiness that you seek and find a cure for your disease.
Sincerely,
Bob Ankist
Hello Anonymous Coward,
We have have been reviewing our network usage policy contract within your account and have discovered a violation of your service. You have transmitted information across our networks with intention of slandering our hard-working staff and creditors. Mr/Mrs. Anonymous Cowheard, we find it unacceptible, calous, and most certainly ill-tempered to accuse Network Associates of utilizing "moles" and "payoffs" of individuals outside of Network Associates to steal your most trusted and secure data. Please take measures on your behalf to prevent such communication from moving across our networks and we will continue your service. You are on notice and your conspirator, pater@slashdot.org, has been notified equally. Thankyou for your time.
- Bob Istan
It has come to our most desirable attention that your spacecraft is utilizing our most powerful communication technology across our networks and your service cost has yet to be reviewed. If you are aware of your contract with Network Associates, please contact our esteemed financial assistant to discuss a better suited payment plan for your financial situation or discontinue using our service. Failing to comply with this notice will result in repossesion of our property and your property shall be placed under lien. Your space vehicle is currently outside our solar system and upon reentry to Earth's atmosphere we will seize its use until we, Network Associates, has been accounted. Thankyou.
-Bob Gulson