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If by proprietary you mean an open and fully documented standard like Open Firmware, then yes.

http://playground.sun.com/pub/p1275/

The guys working on Darwin have done some amazing work on getting OS X to run on legacy Mac hardware. Check out the incredible work that Ryan Rempel has done on XPostFacto:

http://eshop.macsales.com/OSXCenter/framework.cfm? page=XPostFacto.html

for a fantastic example -- he's written kernel extensions and an installer that allow users to install OS X on older macs it was never really designed for. And it works great -- I've got OS X running on an old 7500, and it truly was a trouble free installation; three clicks more than a normal OS X install.

~jeff

ms-its:C:\WINNT\Help\Gstart.chm::/whats_new_in_win dows_2000_server.htm

This opens up options for using IE to extract text and graphics. If you just need the odd item, go to the page in Help, copy the URL to IE, and use IE's Save features. Mass dumps are harder. You could probably do it programmatically, since IE is a COM Automation server. But there are differences in the way links work, and you'd have to figure those out.

It's my understanding the CHM is built using something called the IStorage Interface, but I'm vague on the specifics. There's some interesting Delphi software here (look for the "CHM Explorer Demo"). This Usenet thread is also intriguing.

I have to take the excuse to bemoan the poor state of online Help engines. More and more documentation is moving online, yet nobody seems to be really working on it. JavaHelp looks promising, but it doesn't seem to attract much interest outside the Java community. (Are the issues technical or political?) The KDE web site boasts of an "XML help system", but that just means they do their authoring in XML -- which is good, but the content is actually distributed as a large collection of HTML files, managed by a standard web indexer and a poorly integrated TOC manager. GNOME does something similar.

Which means that HTML Help, despite its flaws and limitations, is actually the best widely-used Help Engine! A sad state of affairs.

This isn't rocket science. All you need is a way to combine a lot of files into a resource archive (no sane product integrator wants to include thousands of separate text files in a product), an indexer, an outliner, and some basic UI engineering. But I don't see any real open-source effort at all. Come on, do you want people to use Linux on the desktop or not?

I've been working on a computationally expensive project where I see gcc-3.0.3 (with CFLAGS = -O2 -mcpu=ultrasparc) beat out Sun Workshop 5.0 (CFLAGS = -fast).

It's also worth mentioning that these tests were done using C++ as the implementation language, so it's very possible that gcc 3 would do better than 2.95. My understanding is that C++ support is better in gcc 3.

Workshop 5, on the other hand, is a buggy piece of junk. We're currently using it on the project I'm working on and we're having to jump through all kinds of hoops to keep it from miscompiling the program. gcc 2.95 on Linux and VAC++ for AIX both work fine.

Let me just whip out the old VISA...

http://store.sun.com/catalog/doc/BrowsePage.jhtml? cid=70636

I'm suprised they quote prices for things like that online (it's cool!). Big ticket items usually require talking to a sales rep. Check out the product configuration screen: it's like shopping at Dell or the Apple store, except with three extra zeros on the end of everything.

(288 GIGAbytes of *ram*! Yeehaa!)

This page describes the system suspend-resume feature on Solaris and also has a useful list of things that won't work and to be aware of while a system is suspended. This could be useful to anyone implementing or using a similar feature.

Hot swapping is done already, not just on mainframes. After all, database servers/web servers often need 'high' reliablility.
The newer sun kit (I'm thinking their V880) will support hot plug pci power and disks, the E10k will handle hot swap processors and mainboards.(which is why it costs a bit, and sun are willing to _guarantee_ a high availability - about 99.999% I believe)
I believe an RS6000 will cope with this too.
(The Starfire - getting close to a mainframe admittedly :))

not according to the RFE asking for it.

Hi nice to meet you. I'm a sysadmin at a community college. Not that high a budget, y'know? Still, we use at least 10k scsi drives in everything we can, 15k for the ones that matter.
We make Good Use of these drives and if they were any slower i would be getting way way too many phone calls.

If you look at Dell's offerings (we buy a lot of dells here) in the server range, it's tough to find something that doesn't come with 10k scsi drives. I think their 350 is the only one that comes with IDE drives.
Going over to Sun's lineup, you'll see that their low-end desktop machines like their SunBlade 100 now have IDE drives in them but everything else has at least 10k scsi or fc drives.

I know plenty of people who run servers off of pc, IDE based hardware, but most of these are either personal sites of fellow geeks. My home mass storage unit has one of those nifty Promise FastTrack100 IDE RAID cards, but that's b/c i can't afford SCSI and the storage is only used by me (well, my friends too when they download my movies/mp3s, but scp'ing via my home net connection will in no way hammer the storage unit). Most server rooms i've been to have the dells or similar equipment with SCSI in them, even the really shitty server rooms with really shitty boxes, those people still use scsi cards & drives.

Of course you're right about cost and use, but in most environments it is essential to plan for the future. Buying more or faster disk than we currently need might seem silly now but sometimes growth occurs inversely proportionate to budget - i'm already regretting not having taken larger bites when i could of b/c some of our servers are becoming seriously underpowered and i dont know if our current budget will let us purchase what we need (but i bet i coulda swung for more when i first bought the server in question).

Hi nice to meet you. I'm a sysadmin at a community college. Not that high a budget, y'know? Still, we use at least 10k scsi drives in everything we can, 15k for the ones that matter.
We make Good Use of these drives and if they were any slower i would be getting way way too many phone calls.

If you look at Dell's offerings (we buy a lot of dells here) in the server range, it's tough to find something that doesn't come with 10k scsi drives. I think their 350 is the only one that comes with IDE drives.
Going over to Sun's lineup, you'll see that their low-end desktop machines like their SunBlade 100 now have IDE drives in them but everything else has at least 10k scsi or fc drives.

I know plenty of people who run servers off of pc, IDE based hardware, but most of these are either personal sites of fellow geeks. My home mass storage unit has one of those nifty Promise FastTrack100 IDE RAID cards, but that's b/c i can't afford SCSI and the storage is only used by me (well, my friends too when they download my movies/mp3s, but scp'ing via my home net connection will in no way hammer the storage unit). Most server rooms i've been to have the dells or similar equipment with SCSI in them, even the really shitty server rooms with really shitty boxes, those people still use scsi cards & drives.

Of course you're right about cost and use, but in most environments it is essential to plan for the future. Buying more or faster disk than we currently need might seem silly now but sometimes growth occurs inversely proportionate to budget - i'm already regretting not having taken larger bites when i could of b/c some of our servers are becoming seriously underpowered and i dont know if our current budget will let us purchase what we need (but i bet i coulda swung for more when i first bought the server in question).

Now if only I could have it run in the BIOS. Imagine if on the bios level, without a proper key or password or whatever, if the hard drive was removed and replaced, it would then call a panic number whenever connected. That'd be neat.

Actually you can most likely do that on a Mac. All of the Macs in the past 5 - 8 years use a BIOS-like system called called Open Firmware. Open Firmware basically sets up the machine to load up the operating system and it does other initialization tasks. It is also used by some other computer manufacturers as it is an open standard.

The neat thing about Open Firmware is that it is programmable. It is written in Forth and you can write additions to it and install them. These additions are persistent across power-downs and can be password protected. So it is possible that you can write some sort of network notification into Open Firmware, I do know that it is aware of TCP and such because you can remotely operate the machine if it crashes in open firmware and you can also use Open Firmware to network boot the machine.

The other cool thing about Open Firmware is that you can set it to require a password at boot. If the password is not entered then the machine will not load ANY drive. This password is much harder to disable than an operating system password or hard drive password lock, although there are a few obscure and involved ways of bypassing it if you are extremely familiar with the system.

This page has some good links on Open Firmware. This site is hosted by Sun and has a ton of very specific and detailed information on Open Firmware. And lastly, Open Firmware is the only firmware standard in existence to have its own song!

Now if only I could have it run in the BIOS. Imagine if on the bios level, without a proper key or password or whatever, if the hard drive was removed and replaced, it would then call a panic number whenever connected. That'd be neat.

Actually you can most likely do that on a Mac. All of the Macs in the past 5 - 8 years use a BIOS-like system called called Open Firmware. Open Firmware basically sets up the machine to load up the operating system and it does other initialization tasks. It is also used by some other computer manufacturers as it is an open standard.

The neat thing about Open Firmware is that it is programmable. It is written in Forth and you can write additions to it and install them. These additions are persistent across power-downs and can be password protected. So it is possible that you can write some sort of network notification into Open Firmware, I do know that it is aware of TCP and such because you can remotely operate the machine if it crashes in open firmware and you can also use Open Firmware to network boot the machine.

The other cool thing about Open Firmware is that you can set it to require a password at boot. If the password is not entered then the machine will not load ANY drive. This password is much harder to disable than an operating system password or hard drive password lock, although there are a few obscure and involved ways of bypassing it if you are extremely familiar with the system.

This page has some good links on Open Firmware. This site is hosted by Sun and has a ton of very specific and detailed information on Open Firmware. And lastly, Open Firmware is the only firmware standard in existence to have its own song!

Throw in a little special version of Abiword. Throw in a special version Gnumeric.

Why not throw in StarOffice? AOL already has a relationship with Sun, and StarOffice is disturbingly similar to Microsoft Office in many ways, down to the placement and naming of menus.

You're excused.
Movies will be just the first wave of high bandwidth applications. Once enough people have enough bandwidth, the real killer apllications will come.
Just like the most usefull internet applications now are e-mail (including maillists) and instant messaging/chatting, the really usefull high bandwidth applications will ease communication between (groups of) people.
For some examples of applications that need a lot of bandwidth, try http://apps.internet2.edu/.
Another possibility is a version of the Sun Ray system. Imagine storing all your data (work, pictures, movies...) on a single server at home, and accessing it from anywhere in the world, using very light weight clients.

This is the common FUD spread by Microsoft regarding the Java standard, but you forgot one important thing... the truth.

The truth is.. Sun can't protect an open standard. If Java was a totally open standard then Microsoft could "embrace and extend" Java into the ground and destroy it. Sun isn't stupid.

The truth is, Sun makes every step possible to keep Java as standard as possible and documents it VERY VERY VERY well. Go to http://java.sun.com/docs/books and see for yourself. Scroll down, look at the bottom. THAT is the standard.

Sun also goes to great pains to receive feedback from the community and industry. In fact a lot of the EJB and J2EE standards were dictated by application server companies.

I'd rather have this ULTRA ;-)

... slowly and methodically picking through all of your code to make sure that no buffers can overflow is just uninteresting and unglamorous.

It has come to my attention that the entire Linux community is a hotbed of so called 'alternative sexuality,' which includes anything from hedonistic orgies to homosexuality to pedophilia.

What better way of demonstrating this than by looking at the hidden messages contained within the names of some of Linux's most outspoken advocates:

• Linus Torvalds is an anagram of slit anus or VD 'L,' clearly referring to himself by the first initial.
• Richard M. Stallman, spokespervert for the Gaysex's Not Unusual 'movement' is an anagram of mans cram thrill ad.
• Alan Cox is barely an anagram of anal cox which is just so filthy and unchristian it unnerves me.

I'm sure that Eric S. Raymond, composer of the satanic homosexual propaganda diatribe The Cathedral and the Bizarre, is probably an anagram of something queer, but we don't need to look that far as we know he's always shoving a gun up some poor little boy's rectum. Update: Eric S. Raymond is actually an anagram for secondary rim and cord in my arse. It just goes to show you that he is indeed queer.

Update the Second: It is also documented that Evil Sicko Gaymond is responsible for a nauseating piece of code called Fetchmail, which is obviously sinister sodomite slang for 'Felch Male' -- a disgusting practise. For those not in the know, 'felching' is the act performed by two perverts wherein one sucks their own post-coital ejaculate out of the other's rectum. In fact, it appears that the dirty Linux faggots set out to undermine the good Republican institution of e-mail, turning it into 'e-male.'

As far as Richard 'Master' Stallman goes, that filthy fudge-packer was actually quoted on leftist commie propaganda site Salon.com as saying the following: 'I've been resistant to the pressure to conform in any circumstance,' he says. 'It's about being able to question conventional wisdom,' he asserts. 'I believe in love, but not monogamy,' he says plainly.

And this isn't a made up troll bullshit either! He actually stated this tripe, which makes it obvious that he is trying to politely say that he's a flaming homo slut!

Speaking about 'flaming,' who better to point out as a filthy chutney ferret than Slashdot's very own self-confessed pederast Jon Katz. Although an obvious deviant anagram cannot be found from his name, he has already confessed, nay boasted of the homosexual perversion of corrupting the innocence of young children. To quote from the article linked:

'I've got a rare kidney disease,' I told her. 'I have to go to the bathroom a lot. You can come with me if you want, but it takes a while. Is that okay with you? Do you want a note from my doctor?'

Is this why you were touching your penis in the cinema, Jon? And letting the other boys touch it too?

We should also point out that Jon Katz refers to himself as 'Slashdot's resident Gasbag.' Is there any more doubt? For those fortunate few who aren't aware of the list of homosexual terminology found inside the Linux 'Sauce Code,' a 'Gasbag' is a pervert who gains sexual gratification from having a thin straw inserted into his urethra (or to use the common parlance, 'piss-pipe'), then his homosexual lover blows firmly down the straw to inflate his scrotum. This is, of course, when he's not busy violating the dignity and copyright of posters to Slashdot by gathering together their postings and publishing them en masse to further his twisted and manipulative journalistic agenda.

Sick, disgusting antichristian perverts, the lot of them.

In addition, many of the Linux distributions (a 'distribution' is the most common way to spread the faggots' wares) are run by faggot groups. The Slackware distro is named after the 'Slack-wear' fags wear to allow easy access to the anus for sexual purposes. Furthermore, Slackware is a close anagram of claw arse, a reference to the homosexual practise of anal fisting. The Mandrake product is run by a group of French faggot satanists, and is named after the faggot nickname for the vibrator. It was also chosen because it is an anagram for dark amen and ram naked, which is what they do.

Another 'distro,' (abbrieviated as such because it sounds a bit like 'Disco,' which is where homosexuals preyed on young boys in the 1970s), is Debian, an anagram of in a bed, which could be considered innocent enough (after all, a bed is both where we sleep and pray), until we realise what other names Debian uses to describe their foul wares. 'Woody' is obvious enough, being a term for the erect male penis, glistening with pre-cum. But far sicker is the phrase 'Frozen Potato' that they use. This filthy term, again found in the secret homosexual 'Sauce Code,' refers to the solo homosexual practice of defecating into a clear polythene bag, shaping the turd into a crude approximation of the male phallus, then leaving it in the freezer overnight until it becomes solid. The practitioner then proceeds to push the frozen 'potato' up his own rectum, squeezing it in and out until his tight young balls erupt in a screaming orgasm.

And Red Hat is secret homo slang for the tip of a penis that is soaked in blood from a freshly violated underage ringpiece.

The fags have even invented special tools to aid their faggotry! For example, the 'supermount' tool was devised to allow deeper penetration, which is good for fags because it gives more pressure on the prostate gland. 'Automount' is used, on the other hand, because Linux users are all fat and gay, and need to mount each other automatically.

The depths of their depravity can be seen in their use of 'mount points.' These are, plainly speaking, the different points of penetration. The main one is obviously /anus, but there are others. Militant fags even say 'there is no /opt mount point' because for these dirty perverts faggotry is not optional but a way of life.

More evidence is in the fact that Linux users say how much they love `man`, even going so far as to say that all new Linux users (who are in fact just innocent heterosexuals indoctrinated by the gay propaganda) should try out `man`. In no other system do users boast of their frequent recourse to a man.

Other areas of the system also show Linux's inherit gayness. For example, people are often told of the 'FAQ,' but how many innocent heterosexual Windows users know what this actually means. The answer is shocking: Faggot Anal Quest: the voyage of discovery for newly converted fags!

Even the title 'Slashdot' originally referred to a homosexual practice. Slashdot of course refers to the popular gay practice of blood-letting. The Slashbots, of course are those super-zealous homosexuals who take this perversion to its extreme by ripping open their anuses, as seen on the site most popular with Slashdot users, the depraved work of Satan, http://www.eff.org/.

The editors of Slashdot also have homosexual names: 'Hemos' is obvious in itself, being one vowel away from 'Homos.' But even more sickening is 'Commander Taco' which sounds a bit like 'Commode in Taco,' filthy gay slang for a pair of spreadeagled buttocks that are caked with excrement. (The best form of lubrication, they insist.) Sometimes, these 'Taco Commodes' have special 'Salsa Sauce' (blood from a ruptured rectum) and 'Cheese' (rancid flakes of penis discharge) toppings. And to make it even worse, Slashdot runs on Apache!

The Apache server, whose use among fags is as prevalent as AIDS, is named after homosexual activity -- as everyone knows, popular faggot band, the Village People, featured an Apache Indian, and it is for him that this gay program is named.

And that's not forgetting the use of patches in the Linux fag world -- patches are used to make the anus accessible for repeated anal sex even after its rupture by a session of fisting.

To summarise: Linux is gay. 'Slash -- Dot' is the graphical description of the space between a young boy's scrotum and anus. And BeOS is for hermaphrodites and disabled 'stumpers.'

FEEDBACK

What worries me is how much you know about what gay people do. I'm scared I actually read this whole thing. I think this post is a good example of the negative effects of Internet usage on people. This person obviously has no social life anymore and had to result to writing something as stupid as this. And actually take the time to do it too. Although... I think it was satire.. blah.. it's early. -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

Well, the only reason I know all about this is because I had the misfortune to read the Linux 'Sauce code' once. Although publicised as the computer code needed to get Linux up and running on a computer (and haven't you always been worried about the phrase 'Monolithic Kernel'?), this foul document is actually a detailed and graphic description of every conceivable degrading perversion known to the human race, as well as a few of the major animal species. It has shocked and disturbed me, to the point of needing to shock and disturb the common man to warn them of the impending homo-calypse which threatens to engulf our planet.

You must work for the government. Trying to post the most obscene stuff in hopes that slashdot won't be able to continue or something, due to legal woes. If i ever see your ugly face, i'm going to stick my fireplace poker up your ass, after it's nice and hot, to weld shut that nasty gaping hole of yours. -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

Doesn't it give you a hard-on to imagine your thick strong poker ramming it's way up my most sacred of sphincters? You're beyond help, my friend, as the only thing you can imagine is the foul penetrative violation of another man. Are you sure you're not Eric Raymond? The government, being populated by limp-wristed liberals, could never stem the sickening tide of homosexual child molesting Linux advocacy. Hell, they've given NAMBLA free reign for years!

you really should post this logged in. i wish i could remember jebus's password, cuz i'd give it to you. -- mighty jebus, Slashdot

Thank you for your kind words of support. However, this document shall only ever be posted anonymously. This is because the 'Open Sauce' movement is a sham, proposing homoerotic cults of hero worshipping in the name of freedom. I speak for the common man. For any man who prefers the warm, enveloping velvet folds of a woman's vagina to the tight puckered ringpiece of a child. These men, being common, decent folk, don't have a say in the political hypocrisy that is Slashdot culture. I am the unknown liberator.

ROLF LAMO i hate linux FAGGOTS -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

We shouldn't hate them, we should pity them for the misguided fools they are... Fanatical Linux zeal-outs need to be herded into camps for re-education and subsequent rehabilitation into normal heterosexual society. This re-education shall be achieved by forcing them to watch repeats of Baywatch until the very mention of Pamela Anderson causes them to fill their pants with healthy heterosexual jism.

Actually, that's not at all how scrotal inflation works. I understand it involves injecting sterile saline solution into the scrotum. I've never tried this, but you can read how to do it safely in case you're interested. (Before you moderate this down, ask yourself honestly -- who are the real crazies -- people who do scrotal inflation, or people who pay $1000+ for a game console?) -- double_h, Slashdot

Well, it just goes to show that even the holy Linux 'sauce code' is riddled with bugs that need fixing. (The irony of Jon Katz not even being able to inflate his scrotum correctly has not been lost on me.) The Linux pervert elite already acknowledge this, with their queer slogan: 'Given enough arms, all rectums are shallow.' And anyway, the PS2 sucks major cock and isn't worth the money. Intellivision forever!

dude did u used to post on msnbc's nt bulletin board now that u are doing anti-gay posts u also need to start in with anti-black stuff too c u in church -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

For one thing, whilst Linux is a cavalcade of queer propaganda masquerading as the future of computing, NT is used by people who think nothing better of encasing their genitals in quick setting plaster then going to see a really dirty porno film, enjoying the restriction enforced onto them. Remember, a wasted arousal is a sin in the eyes of the Catholic church. Clearly, the only god-fearing Christian operating system in existence is CP/M -- The Christian Program Monitor. All computer users should immediately ask their local pastor to install this fine OS onto their systems. It is the only route to salvation.

Secondly, this message is for every man. Computers know no colour. Not only that, but one of the finest websites in the world is maintained by a Black Man . Now fuck off you racist donkey felcher.

And don't forget that slashdot was written in Perl, which is just too close to 'Pearl Necklace' for comfort.... oh wait; that's something all you heterosexuals do.... I can't help but wonder how much faster the trolls could do First-Posts on this site if it were redone in PHP... I could hand-type dynamic HTML pages faster than Perl can do them. -- phee, Slashdot

Although there is nothing unholy about the fine heterosexual act of ejaculating between a woman's breasts, squirting one's load up towards her neck and chin area, it should be noted that Perl (standing for Pansies Entering Rectums Locally) is also close to 'Pearl Monocle,' 'Pearl Nosering,' and the ubiquitous 'Pearl Enema.'

One scary thing about Perl is that it contains hidden homosexual messages. Take the following code: LWP::Simple -- It looks innocuous enough, doesn't it? But look at the line closely: There are two colons next to each other! As Larry 'Balls to the' Wall would openly admit in the Perl Documentation, Perl was designed from the ground up to indoctrinate it's programmers into performing unnatural sexual acts -- having two colons so closely together is clearly a reference to the perverse sickening act of 'colon kissing,' whereby two homosexual queers spread their buttocks wide, pressing their filthy torn sphincters together. They then share small round objects like marbles or golfballs by passing them from one rectum to another using muscle contraction alone. This is also referred to in programming 'circles' as 'Parameter Passing.'

And PHP stands for Perverted Homosexual Penetration. Didn't you know?

Thank you for your valuable input on this. I am sure you will be never forgotten. BTW: Did I mention that this could be useful in terraforming Mars? Mars rulaa. -- Eimernase, Slashdot

Well, I don't know about terraforming Mars, but I do know that homosexual Linux Advocates have been probing Uranus for years.

That's inspiring. Keep up the good work, AC. May God in his wisdom grant you the strength to bring the plain honest truth to this community, and make it pure again. Yours, Cerberus. -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

*sniff* That brings a tear to my eye. Thank you once more for your kind support. I have taken faith in the knowledge that I am doing the Good Lord's work, but it is encouraging to know that I am helping out the common man here.

However, I should be cautious about revealing your name 'Cerberus' on such a filthy den of depravity as Slashdot. It is a well known fact that the 'Kerberos' documentation from Microsoft is a detailed manual describing, in intimate, exacting detail, how to sexually penetrate a variety of unwilling canine animals; be they domesticated, wild, or mythical. Slashdot posters have taken great pleasure in illegally spreading this documentation far and wide, treating it as an 'extension' to the Linux 'Sauce Code,' for the sake of 'interoperability.' (The slang term they use for nonconsensual intercourse -- their favourite kind.)

In fact, sick twisted Linux deviants are known to have LAN parties, (Love of Anal Naughtiness, needless to say.), wherein they entice a stray dog, known as the 'Samba Mount,' into their homes. Up to four of these filth-sodden blasphemers against nature take turns to plunge their erect, throbbing, uncircumcised members, conkers-deep, into the rectum, mouth, and other fleshy orifices of the poor animal. Eventually, the 'Samba Mount' collapses due to 'overload,' and needs to be 'rebooted.' (i.e., kicked out into the street, and left to fend for itself.) Many Linux users boast about their 'uptime' in such situations.

Inspiring stuff! If only all trolls were this quality! -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

If only indeed. You can help our brave cause by moderating this message up as often as possible. I recommend '+1, Underrated,' as that will protect your precious Karma in Metamoderation. Only then can we break through the glass ceiling of Homosexual Slashdot Culture. Is it any wonder that the new version of Slashcode has been christened 'Bender'???

If we can get just one of these postings up to at least '+1,' then it will be archived forever! Others will learn of our struggle, and join with us in our battle for freedom!

It's pathetic you've spent so much time writing this. -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

I am compelled to document the foulness and carnal depravity that is Linux, in order that we may prepare ourselves for the great holy war that is to follow. It is my solemn duty to peel back the foreskin of ignorance and apply the wire brush of enlightenment.

As with any great open-source project, you need someone asking this question, so I'll do it. When the hell is version 2.0 going to be ready?!?! -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

I could make an arrogant, childish comment along the lines of 'Every time someone asks for 2.0, I won't release it for another 24 hours,' but the truth of the matter is that I'm quite nervous of releasing a 'number two,' as I can guarantee some filthy shit-slurping Linux pervert would want to suck it straight out of my anus before I've even had chance to wipe.

I desperately want to suck your monolithic kernel, you sexy hunk, you. -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

I sincerely hope you're Natalie Portman.

Dude, nothing on slashdot larger than 3 paragraphs is worth reading. Try to distill the message, whatever it was, and maybe I'll read it. As it is, I have to much open source software to write to waste even 10 seconds of precious time. 10 seconds is all its gonna take M$ to whoop Linux's ass. Vigilence is the price of Free (as in libre -- from the fine, frou frou French language) Software. Hack on fellow geeks, and remember: Friday is Bouillabaisse day except for heathens who do not believe that Jesus died for their sins. Those godless, oil drench, bearded sexist clowns can pull grits from their pantaloons (another fine, fine French word) and eat that. Anyway, try to keep your message focused and concise. For concision is the soul of derision. Way. -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

What the fuck?

I've read your gay conspiracy post version 1.3.0 and I must say I'm impressed. In particular, I appreciate how you have managed to squeeze in a healthy dose of the latent homosexuality you gay-bashing homos tend to be full of. Thank you again. -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

Well bugger me!

ooooh honey. how insecure are you!!! wann a little massage from deare bruci. love you -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

Fuck right off!

IMPORTANT: This message needs to be heard (Not HURD, which is an acronym for 'Huge Unclean Rectal Dilator') across the whole community, so it has been released into the Public Domain. You know, that licence that we all had before those homoerotic crypto-fascists came out with the GPL (Gay Penetration License) that is no more than an excuse to see who's got the biggest feces-encrusted cock. I would have put this up on Freshmeat, but that name is known to be a euphemism for the tight rump of a young boy.

Come to think of it, the whole concept of 'Source Control' unnerves me, because it sounds a bit like 'Sauce Control,' which is a description of the homosexual practice of holding the base of the cock shaft tightly upon the point of ejaculation, thus causing a build up of semenal fluid that is only released upon entry into an incision made into the base of the receiver's scrotum. And 'Open Sauce' is the act of ejaculating into another mans face or perhaps a biscuit to be shared later. Obviously, 'Closed Sauce' is the only Christian thing to do, as evidenced by the fact that it is what Cathedrals are all about.

Contributors: (although not to the eternal game of 'soggy biscuit' that open 'sauce' development has become) Anonymous Coward, Anonymous Coward, phee, Anonymous Coward, mighty jebus, Anonymous Coward, Anonymous Coward, double_h, Anonymous Coward, Eimernase, Anonymous Coward, Anonymous Coward, Anonymous Coward, Anonymous Coward, Anonymous Coward, Anonymous Coward, Anonymous Coward, Anonymous Coward. Further contributions are welcome.

Current changes: This version sent to FreeWIPO by 'Bring BackATV' as plain text. Reformatted everything, added all links back in (that we could match from the previous version), many new ones (Slashbot bait links). Even more spelling fixed. Who wrote this thing, CmdrTaco himself?

Previous changes: Yet more changes added. Spelling fixed. Feedback added. Explanation of 'distro' system. 'Mount Point' syntax described. More filth regarding `man` and Slashdot. Yet more fucking spelling fixed. 'Fetchmail' uncovered further. More Slashbot baiting. Apache exposed. Distribution licence at foot of document.

ANUX -- A full Linux distribution... Up your ass!

Does HancomOffice have open file formats, so that other office suites (e.g. Star/Open Office, KOffice, GNOME Office) can easily create import/export filters? As a completely side note, it would be nice if the above office-suite projects would get together and form a unified file format spec. That way there would only be one format each suite would be targeting for word-processors, for example. Just a thought...

One service (the BasicService) provides access to the user's default browser.

This is not exactly an "embedded browser" but it may be what you need.

One service (the BasicService) provides access to the user's default browser.

This is not exactly an "embedded browser" but it may be what you need.

Sun made many mistakes during its big Java push. One of the biggest was their failure to implement a decent HTML viewer in Java. Instead they gave us HotJava. A classic Java app. Trivial to port to a new OS, but utterly useless once you got it there.

Sun has been totally retarded in how they've handled their HotJava HTML Component. Guess they're worried about loosing browser marketshare to M$.

I have had the misfortune to have to implement a complete UI toolkit based on the limited capabilities of the JDK 1.1 AWT.

As far as the high level design is concerned, I can recommend using a model similar to Swing, simplifying where possible. Swing, although implemented horribly, has a fairly clean design and it supports practically anything you'd want from a UI toolkit. Here are some: Model View Controller pattern makes it very modular and therefore easily customizeable, pluggable look and feel which can change at runtime, the event model is clean although sometimes requires you to write a lot of classes just to support a single event.

Read the swing tutorial or the documentation

I have had the misfortune to have to implement a complete UI toolkit based on the limited capabilities of the JDK 1.1 AWT.

As far as the high level design is concerned, I can recommend using a model similar to Swing, simplifying where possible. Swing, although implemented horribly, has a fairly clean design and it supports practically anything you'd want from a UI toolkit. Here are some: Model View Controller pattern makes it very modular and therefore easily customizeable, pluggable look and feel which can change at runtime, the event model is clean although sometimes requires you to write a lot of classes just to support a single event.

Read the swing tutorial or the documentation

Is your hair dyed or are you a natural redhead?

In Java, if you try this, it will always return the same IP Addresses, even if you dial-up/hang-up and renew, and enable/disable interfaces, which makes it useless. You have to restart the JVM to get the new addresses.

I have automated its use on several projects. Make a cron job that:

• Gets a copy of the latest sources from CVS
• Runs javadoc against the fresh sources

-Andy

I believe there are other systems that implement a Javadoc like utility for other language. Do a google for "Javadoc for C++" for example and plent of links show up.

Native compilation doesn't make any sense on the Java platform. Consider the way things are now:

• The JVM and the command line tools used to launch the JVM are the only platform-specific code in the JDK.
  
• Porting to different platforms is cake because you need only change the JVM and the command-line tool launchers.
  
• The rest of the JDK is ported for free since they are all Java bytecode files anyway.
  

If Java was reworked in such a way as to take the binary output and make it so it ran on Linux only, then you have completely violated the primary intent of the platform. Sure, the code is "portable" in the sense that you can recompile it on, say Windows, and it will "work". But the idea of Java is write once, run anywhere. That means without having to do anything to the binary output. That's why you have a virtual machine.

Java is not perfect. It has some flaws and annoyances. But Java is the Virtual Machine. Without it, no Java.

If you're worried about memory usage, startup time, application integrity and speed, then take the time to read this and this. A lot of the problems with Java aren't problems with Java; the problem is the programmers not using the platform correctly or wanting to take the time to learn how to use it.

Java is not going to run as fast as a native application with the HotSpot VM, but there are others available if you want them. I can't give you the urls for any, but if you really want one bad enough, you'll find it.

Native compilation doesn't make any sense on the Java platform. Consider the way things are now:

• The JVM and the command line tools used to launch the JVM are the only platform-specific code in the JDK.
  
• Porting to different platforms is cake because you need only change the JVM and the command-line tool launchers.
  
• The rest of the JDK is ported for free since they are all Java bytecode files anyway.
  

If Java was reworked in such a way as to take the binary output and make it so it ran on Linux only, then you have completely violated the primary intent of the platform. Sure, the code is "portable" in the sense that you can recompile it on, say Windows, and it will "work". But the idea of Java is write once, run anywhere. That means without having to do anything to the binary output. That's why you have a virtual machine.

Java is not perfect. It has some flaws and annoyances. But Java is the Virtual Machine. Without it, no Java.

If you're worried about memory usage, startup time, application integrity and speed, then take the time to read this and this. A lot of the problems with Java aren't problems with Java; the problem is the programmers not using the platform correctly or wanting to take the time to learn how to use it.

Java is not going to run as fast as a native application with the HotSpot VM, but there are others available if you want them. I can't give you the urls for any, but if you really want one bad enough, you'll find it.

A followup on that question: can Sun break the normal reluctance of major companies to use something without all three of

- a distribution kit (a CD at least)

Here is your CD

- a service contract (even if they don't actually buy it) and
Here is your support contract, both free and pay versions.

- a popular book.

Here are enough books to fill a shelf.

A followup on that question: can Sun break the normal reluctance of major companies to use something without all three of

- a distribution kit (a CD at least)

Here is your CD

- a service contract (even if they don't actually buy it) and
Here is your support contract, both free and pay versions.

- a popular book.

Here are enough books to fill a shelf.

http://java.sun.com/features/2001/07/images/dcoope r.oscon.jpg

May I please have a piece of that, ma'am? ;)

Doesn't "Diva" imply a certain level of activeness ?

what a looker
or maybe not...
Well I don't care, just gimme karma.

If you use Sun's JDK (I use 1.3.1_02 on Windows--yes Windows), you have the option to download the source code for the runtime libraries. There is a file called src.jar. In it, you will find the .java source for all of the classes that come with the JRE.

You will also find java.c, java.h, java_md.c, java_md.h. Now, I'm no C/Windows programmer, but after reading those files, they appear to be skeletons for what you would need to build your own VM launcher. So, if you were distributing a Java application to customers who use Windows, you could code your own VM launcher so that your customers could launch their applications by clicking an icon on their desktop without opening a Run box or CMD Prompt and typing 'java ClassName'.

I guess I just don't see the value in looking at the source code for the VM. As I said, I'm not a C programmer (but I know and have programmed it before) so looking at platform specific code to me is worthless.

Further, the specifications are available for the Java Languge and the virtual machine. If you are so inclined, you should roll your own.

If you use Sun's JDK (I use 1.3.1_02 on Windows--yes Windows), you have the option to download the source code for the runtime libraries. There is a file called src.jar. In it, you will find the .java source for all of the classes that come with the JRE.

You will also find java.c, java.h, java_md.c, java_md.h. Now, I'm no C/Windows programmer, but after reading those files, they appear to be skeletons for what you would need to build your own VM launcher. So, if you were distributing a Java application to customers who use Windows, you could code your own VM launcher so that your customers could launch their applications by clicking an icon on their desktop without opening a Run box or CMD Prompt and typing 'java ClassName'.

I guess I just don't see the value in looking at the source code for the VM. As I said, I'm not a C programmer (but I know and have programmed it before) so looking at platform specific code to me is worthless.

Further, the specifications are available for the Java Languge and the virtual machine. If you are so inclined, you should roll your own.

For all those who are dying to see what
she looks like....

Sun made an enourmous amount of noise about how it was Java was going to be an open standard. But after trying to prevert the standards process by becoming a "Publically Available Submitter", then withdrawing its application and attempting to get the ECMA to rubber stamp, then withdrawing from the ECMA as well, the simple fact is Java has lived up to none of its standardization promises. It claims a "covanent" with its users that means they all want Sun to milk them dry with licensing fees, but thats hard to beleive. Other standards like Ethernet seem to have done relatively well compatability wise, while using Java across multiple platforms is an exercise in frustration.

At what point do users and developers need to pull the rug out from under vendors who consistently lie, such as Sun? What surprisies me here is that people seem to require no moral or ethical dimension to a company, despite the actual business harm dealing with such a company poses. There have been a number of other cases where soon-to-be open sourced software went closed source, so the danger in these situations is real.

Microsoft, after a long history of BS, actually seems to be doing the right thing with C# standards wise, and I suppose the proof will be in the pudding if go-mono.com and the GNU Portable .NET are actually allowed to implement the spec freely. I for one am certainly hoping that the folks who play fairly in this space win out, and in that case Microsoft deserves the prize. Is it possible C# will be a standard everyone can use freely before Java becomes one?

Sun is not just a hardware company. They provide services, too, check their webpage to see what Products and Solutions they list. Open Source refinement and enhancement of their product line would help in improving those revenues.

It has come to my attention that the entire Linux community is a hotbed of so called 'alternative sexuality,' which includes anything from hedonistic orgies to homosexuality to pedophilia.

What better way of demonstrating this than by looking at the hidden messages contained within the names of some of Linux's most outspoken advocates:

• Linus Torvalds is an anagram of slit anus or VD 'L,' clearly referring to himself by the first initial.
• Richard M. Stallman, spokespervert for the Gaysex's Not Unusual 'movement' is an anagram of mans cram thrill ad.
• Alan Cox is barely an anagram of anal cox which is just so filthy and unchristian it unnerves me.

I'm sure that Eric S. Raymond, composer of the satanic homosexual propaganda diatribe The Cathedral and the Bizarre, is probably an anagram of something queer, but we don't need to look that far as we know he's always shoving a gun up some poor little boy's rectum. Update: Eric S. Raymond is actually an anagram for secondary rim and cord in my arse. It just goes to show you that he is indeed queer.

Update the Second: It is also documented that Evil Sicko Gaymond is responsible for a nauseating piece of code called Fetchmail, which is obviously sinister sodomite slang for 'Felch Male' -- a disgusting practise. For those not in the know, 'felching' is the act performed by two perverts wherein one sucks their own post-coital ejaculate out of the other's rectum. In fact, it appears that the dirty Linux faggots set out to undermine the good Republican institution of e-mail, turning it into 'e-male.'

As far as Richard 'Master' Stallman goes, that filthy fudge-packer was actually quoted on leftist commie propaganda site Salon.com as saying the following: 'I've been resistant to the pressure to conform in any circumstance,' he says. 'It's about being able to question conventional wisdom,' he asserts. 'I believe in love, but not monogamy,' he says plainly.

And this isn't a made up troll bullshit either! He actually stated this tripe, which makes it obvious that he is trying to politely say that he's a flaming homo slut!

Speaking about 'flaming,' who better to point out as a filthy chutney ferret than Slashdot's very own self-confessed pederast Jon Katz. Although an obvious deviant anagram cannot be found from his name, he has already confessed, nay boasted of the homosexual perversion of corrupting the innocence of young children. To quote from the article linked:

'I've got a rare kidney disease,' I told her. 'I have to go to the bathroom a lot. You can come with me if you want, but it takes a while. Is that okay with you? Do you want a note from my doctor?'

Is this why you were touching your penis in the cinema, Jon? And letting the other boys touch it too?

We should also point out that Jon Katz refers to himself as 'Slashdot's resident Gasbag.' Is there any more doubt? For those fortunate few who aren't aware of the list of homosexual terminology found inside the Linux 'Sauce Code,' a 'Gasbag' is a pervert who gains sexual gratification from having a thin straw inserted into his urethra (or to use the common parlance, 'piss-pipe'), then his homosexual lover blows firmly down the straw to inflate his scrotum. This is, of course, when he's not busy violating the dignity and copyright of posters to Slashdot by gathering together their postings and publishing them en masse to further his twisted and manipulative journalistic agenda.

Sick, disgusting antichristian perverts, the lot of them.

In addition, many of the Linux distributions (a 'distribution' is the most common way to spread the faggots' wares) are run by faggot groups. The Slackware distro is named after the 'Slack-wear' fags wear to allow easy access to the anus for sexual purposes. Furthermore, Slackware is a close anagram of claw arse, a reference to the homosexual practise of anal fisting. The Mandrake product is run by a group of French faggot satanists, and is named after the faggot nickname for the vibrator. It was also chosen because it is an anagram for dark amen and ram naked, which is what they do.

Another 'distro,' (abbrieviated as such because it sounds a bit like 'Disco,' which is where homosexuals preyed on young boys in the 1970s), is Debian, an anagram of in a bed, which could be considered innocent enough (after all, a bed is both where we sleep and pray), until we realise what other names Debian uses to describe their foul wares. 'Woody' is obvious enough, being a term for the erect male penis, glistening with pre-cum. But far sicker is the phrase 'Frozen Potato' that they use. This filthy term, again found in the secret homosexual 'Sauce Code,' refers to the solo homosexual practice of defecating into a clear polythene bag, shaping the turd into a crude approximation of the male phallus, then leaving it in the freezer overnight until it becomes solid. The practitioner then proceeds to push the frozen 'potato' up his own rectum, squeezing it in and out until his tight young balls erupt in a screaming orgasm.

And Red Hat is secret homo slang for the tip of a penis that is soaked in blood from a freshly violated underage ringpiece.

The fags have even invented special tools to aid their faggotry! For example, the 'supermount' tool was devised to allow deeper penetration, which is good for fags because it gives more pressure on the prostate gland. 'Automount' is used, on the other hand, because Linux users are all fat and gay, and need to mount each other automatically.

The depths of their depravity can be seen in their use of 'mount points.' These are, plainly speaking, the different points of penetration. The main one is obviously /anus, but there are others. Militant fags even say 'there is no /opt mount point' because for these dirty perverts faggotry is not optional but a way of life.

More evidence is in the fact that Linux users say how much they love `man`, even going so far as to say that all new Linux users (who are in fact just innocent heterosexuals indoctrinated by the gay propaganda) should try out `man`. In no other system do users boast of their frequent recourse to a man.

Other areas of the system also show Linux's inherit gayness. For example, people are often told of the 'FAQ,' but how many innocent heterosexual Windows users know what this actually means. The answer is shocking: Faggot Anal Quest: the voyage of discovery for newly converted fags!

Even the title 'Slashdot' originally referred to a homosexual practice. Slashdot of course refers to the popular gay practice of blood-letting. The Slashbots, of course are those super-zealous homosexuals who take this perversion to its extreme by ripping open their anuses, as seen on the site most popular with Slashdot users, the depraved work of Satan, http://www.eff.org/.

The editors of Slashdot also have homosexual names: 'Hemos' is obvious in itself, being one vowel away from 'Homos.' But even more sickening is 'Commander Taco' which sounds a bit like 'Commode in Taco,' filthy gay slang for a pair of spreadeagled buttocks that are caked with excrement. (The best form of lubrication, they insist.) Sometimes, these 'Taco Commodes' have special 'Salsa Sauce' (blood from a ruptured rectum) and 'Cheese' (rancid flakes of penis discharge) toppings. And to make it even worse, Slashdot runs on Apache!

The Apache server, whose use among fags is as prevalent as AIDS, is named after homosexual activity -- as everyone knows, popular faggot band, the Village People, featured an Apache Indian, and it is for him that this gay program is named.

And that's not forgetting the use of patches in the Linux fag world -- patches are used to make the anus accessible for repeated anal sex even after its rupture by a session of fisting.

To summarise: Linux is gay. 'Slash -- Dot' is the graphical description of the space between a young boy's scrotum and anus. And BeOS is for hermaphrodites and disabled 'stumpers.'

FEEDBACK

What worries me is how much you know about what gay people do. I'm scared I actually read this whole thing. I think this post is a good example of the negative effects of Internet usage on people. This person obviously has no social life anymore and had to result to writing something as stupid as this. And actually take the time to do it too. Although... I think it was satire.. blah.. it's early. -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

Well, the only reason I know all about this is because I had the misfortune to read the Linux 'Sauce code' once. Although publicised as the computer code needed to get Linux up and running on a computer (and haven't you always been worried about the phrase 'Monolithic Kernel'?), this foul document is actually a detailed and graphic description of every conceivable degrading perversion known to the human race, as well as a few of the major animal species. It has shocked and disturbed me, to the point of needing to shock and disturb the common man to warn them of the impending homo-calypse which threatens to engulf our planet.

You must work for the government. Trying to post the most obscene stuff in hopes that slashdot won't be able to continue or something, due to legal woes. If i ever see your ugly face, i'm going to stick my fireplace poker up your ass, after it's nice and hot, to weld shut that nasty gaping hole of yours. -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

Doesn't it give you a hard-on to imagine your thick strong poker ramming it's way up my most sacred of sphincters? You're beyond help, my friend, as the only thing you can imagine is the foul penetrative violation of another man. Are you sure you're not Eric Raymond? The government, being populated by limp-wristed liberals, could never stem the sickening tide of homosexual child molesting Linux advocacy. Hell, they've given NAMBLA free reign for years!

you really should post this logged in. i wish i could remember jebus's password, cuz i'd give it to you. -- mighty jebus, Slashdot

Thank you for your kind words of support. However, this document shall only ever be posted anonymously. This is because the 'Open Sauce' movement is a sham, proposing homoerotic cults of hero worshipping in the name of freedom. I speak for the common man. For any man who prefers the warm, enveloping velvet folds of a woman's vagina to the tight puckered ringpiece of a child. These men, being common, decent folk, don't have a say in the political hypocrisy that is Slashdot culture. I am the unknown liberator.

ROLF LAMO i hate linux FAGGOTS -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

We shouldn't hate them, we should pity them for the misguided fools they are... Fanatical Linux zeal-outs need to be herded into camps for re-education and subsequent rehabilitation into normal heterosexual society. This re-education shall be achieved by forcing them to watch repeats of Baywatch until the very mention of Pamela Anderson causes them to fill their pants with healthy heterosexual jism.

Actually, that's not at all how scrotal inflation works. I understand it involves injecting sterile saline solution into the scrotum. I've never tried this, but you can read how to do it safely in case you're interested. (Before you moderate this down, ask yourself honestly -- who are the real crazies -- people who do scrotal inflation, or people who pay $1000+ for a game console?) -- double_h, Slashdot

Well, it just goes to show that even the holy Linux 'sauce code' is riddled with bugs that need fixing. (The irony of Jon Katz not even being able to inflate his scrotum correctly has not been lost on me.) The Linux pervert elite already acknowledge this, with their queer slogan: 'Given enough arms, all rectums are shallow.' And anyway, the PS2 sucks major cock and isn't worth the money. Intellivision forever!

dude did u used to post on msnbc's nt bulletin board now that u are doing anti-gay posts u also need to start in with anti-black stuff too c u in church -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

For one thing, whilst Linux is a cavalcade of queer propaganda masquerading as the future of computing, NT is used by people who think nothing better of encasing their genitals in quick setting plaster then going to see a really dirty porno film, enjoying the restriction enforced onto them. Remember, a wasted arousal is a sin in the eyes of the Catholic church. Clearly, the only god-fearing Christian operating system in existence is CP/M -- The Christian Program Monitor. All computer users should immediately ask their local pastor to install this fine OS onto their systems. It is the only route to salvation.

Secondly, this message is for every man. Computers know no colour. Not only that, but one of the finest websites in the world is maintained by a Black Man . Now fuck off you racist donkey felcher.

And don't forget that slashdot was written in Perl, which is just too close to 'Pearl Necklace' for comfort.... oh wait; that's something all you heterosexuals do.... I can't help but wonder how much faster the trolls could do First-Posts on this site if it were redone in PHP... I could hand-type dynamic HTML pages faster than Perl can do them. -- phee, Slashdot

Although there is nothing unholy about the fine heterosexual act of ejaculating between a woman's breasts, squirting one's load up towards her neck and chin area, it should be noted that Perl (standing for Pansies Entering Rectums Locally) is also close to 'Pearl Monocle,' 'Pearl Nosering,' and the ubiquitous 'Pearl Enema.'

One scary thing about Perl is that it contains hidden homosexual messages. Take the following code: LWP::Simple -- It looks innocuous enough, doesn't it? But look at the line closely: There are two colons next to each other! As Larry 'Balls to the' Wall would openly admit in the Perl Documentation, Perl was designed from the ground up to indoctrinate it's programmers into performing unnatural sexual acts -- having two colons so closely together is clearly a reference to the perverse sickening act of 'colon kissing,' whereby two homosexual queers spread their buttocks wide, pressing their filthy torn sphincters together. They then share small round objects like marbles or golfballs by passing them from one rectum to another using muscle contraction alone. This is also referred to in programming 'circles' as 'Parameter Passing.'

And PHP stands for Perverted Homosexual Penetration. Didn't you know?

Thank you for your valuable input on this. I am sure you will be never forgotten. BTW: Did I mention that this could be useful in terraforming Mars? Mars rulaa. -- Eimernase, Slashdot

Well, I don't know about terraforming Mars, but I do know that homosexual Linux Advocates have been probing Uranus for years.

That's inspiring. Keep up the good work, AC. May God in his wisdom grant you the strength to bring the plain honest truth to this community, and make it pure again. Yours, Cerberus. -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

*sniff* That brings a tear to my eye. Thank you once more for your kind support. I have taken faith in the knowledge that I am doing the Good Lord's work, but it is encouraging to know that I am helping out the common man here.

However, I should be cautious about revealing your name 'Cerberus' on such a filthy den of depravity as Slashdot. It is a well known fact that the 'Kerberos' documentation from Microsoft is a detailed manual describing, in intimate, exacting detail, how to sexually penetrate a variety of unwilling canine animals; be they domesticated, wild, or mythical. Slashdot posters have taken great pleasure in illegally spreading this documentation far and wide, treating it as an 'extension' to the Linux 'Sauce Code,' for the sake of 'interoperability.' (The slang term they use for nonconsensual intercourse -- their favourite kind.)

In fact, sick twisted Linux deviants are known to have LAN parties, (Love of Anal Naughtiness, needless to say.), wherein they entice a stray dog, known as the 'Samba Mount,' into their homes. Up to four of these filth-sodden blasphemers against nature take turns to plunge their erect, throbbing, uncircumcised members, conkers-deep, into the rectum, mouth, and other fleshy orifices of the poor animal. Eventually, the 'Samba Mount' collapses due to 'overload,' and needs to be 'rebooted.' (i.e., kicked out into the street, and left to fend for itself.) Many Linux users boast about their 'uptime' in such situations.

Inspiring stuff! If only all trolls were this quality! -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

If only indeed. You can help our brave cause by moderating this message up as often as possible. I recommend '+1, Underrated,' as that will protect your precious Karma in Metamoderation. Only then can we break through the glass ceiling of Homosexual Slashdot Culture. Is it any wonder that the new version of Slashcode has been christened 'Bender'???

If we can get just one of these postings up to at least '+1,' then it will be archived forever! Others will learn of our struggle, and join with us in our battle for freedom!

It's pathetic you've spent so much time writing this. -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

I am compelled to document the foulness and carnal depravity that is Linux, in order that we may prepare ourselves for the great holy war that is to follow. It is my solemn duty to peel back the foreskin of ignorance and apply the wire brush of enlightenment.

As with any great open-source project, you need someone asking this question, so I'll do it. When the hell is version 2.0 going to be ready?!?! -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

I could make an arrogant, childish comment along the lines of 'Every time someone asks for 2.0, I won't release it for another 24 hours,' but the truth of the matter is that I'm quite nervous of releasing a 'number two,' as I can guarantee some filthy shit-slurping Linux pervert would want to suck it straight out of my anus before I've even had chance to wipe.

I desperately want to suck your monolithic kernel, you sexy hunk, you. -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

I sincerely hope you're Natalie Portman.

Dude, nothing on slashdot larger than 3 paragraphs is worth reading. Try to distill the message, whatever it was, and maybe I'll read it. As it is, I have to much open source software to write to waste even 10 seconds of precious time. 10 seconds is all its gonna take M$ to whoop Linux's ass. Vigilence is the price of Free (as in libre -- from the fine, frou frou French language) Software. Hack on fellow geeks, and remember: Friday is Bouillabaisse day except for heathens who do not believe that Jesus died for their sins. Those godless, oil drench, bearded sexist clowns can pull grits from their pantaloons (another fine, fine French word) and eat that. Anyway, try to keep your message focused and concise. For concision is the soul of derision. Way. -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

What the fuck?

I've read your gay conspiracy post version 1.3.0 and I must say I'm impressed. In particular, I appreciate how you have managed to squeeze in a healthy dose of the latent homosexuality you gay-bashing homos tend to be full of. Thank you again. -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

Well bugger me!

ooooh honey. how insecure are you!!! wann a little massage from deare bruci. love you -- Anonymous Coward, Slashdot

Fuck right off!

IMPORTANT: This message needs to be heard (Not HURD, which is an acronym for 'Huge Unclean Rectal Dilator') across the whole community, so it has been released into the Public Domain. You know, that licence that we all had before those homoerotic crypto-fascists came out with the GPL (Gay Penetration License) that is no more than an excuse to see who's got the biggest feces-encrusted cock. I would have put this up on Freshmeat, but that name is known to be a euphemism for the tight rump of a young boy.

Come to think of it, the whole concept of 'Source Control' unnerves me, because it sounds a bit like 'Sauce Control,' which is a description of the homosexual practice of holding the base of the cock shaft tightly upon the point of ejaculation, thus causing a build up of semenal fluid that is only released upon entry into an incision made into the base of the receiver's scrotum. And 'Open Sauce' is the act of ejaculating into another mans face or perhaps a biscuit to be shared later. Obviously, 'Closed Sauce' is the only Christian thing to do, as evidenced by the fact that it is what Cathedrals are all about.

Contributors: (although not to the eternal game of 'soggy biscuit' that open 'sauce' development has become) Anonymous Coward, Anonymous Coward, phee, Anonymous Coward, mighty jebus, Anonymous Coward, Anonymous Coward, double_h, Anonymous Coward, Eimernase, Anonymous Coward, Anonymous Coward, Anonymous Coward, Anonymous Coward, Anonymous Coward, Anonymous Coward, Anonymous Coward, Anonymous Coward. Further contributions are welcome.

Current changes: This version sent to FreeWIPO by 'Bring BackATV' as plain text. Reformatted everything, added all links back in (that we could match from the previous version), many new ones (Slashbot bait links). Even more spelling fixed. Who wrote this thing, CmdrTaco himself?

Previous changes: Yet more changes added. Spelling fixed. Feedback added. Explanation of 'distro' system. 'Mount Point' syntax described. More filth regarding `man` and Slashdot. Yet more fucking spelling fixed. 'Fetchmail' uncovered further. More Slashbot baiting. Apache exposed. Distribution licence at foot of document.

ANUX -- A full Linux distribution... Up your ass!

I suggest you spend a few moments at Sun's website to learn some facts, so that you can actually include a few in your next post.

Each Sun system has at least one network port.

The ethernet card in question is found here. If you notice, you get a 10/100 UTP port as well as an MII port. So it's different than your average pci nic you'd stuff into your x86 box. Granted yes the price tag is higher than the commodity stuff you'd get for your pc, but so is Apple stuff for an Apple. Kinda basic economics, IMHO. *shrug*

--Disclaimer, yes I work for Sun--

>Sun has removed the download links to Solaris 8

Although they removed the links to the download page, it appears that you can still download x86 solaris 8 from sun by just changing the 'sparc' to 'intel' on the download link

Good thing too, I had decided to cobble a machine together to install solaris over the holiday break and had downloaded the HCL to make sure I was using stuff that was supported. I have the machine assembled, but I hadn't downloaded the CD images yet. Guess I'll be doing that tonight.

Of course half the software you needed didn't run on x86 and hardware support was abysmal (couldn't get v8 to talk to my 3C905, I mean c'mon here). But damn that was a lot of money you just saved.

Then Sun decided to release their Ultra 5 workstations at 6k a piece or so, IIRC. The market for Solaris x86 went **POOF** in about 4 seconds. The damn things are real live UltraSparcs and they work like a hot damn.

Sun made the usual moves to try and spark interest, gave it away free, devoted new marketing resources to it etc. But it didn't catch on, unless you really needed Solaris on your x86 for some reason most of us tried it for 2 days and ran right back to linux or *BSD as fat as we could.

I mean really, with a nicely setup Blade 100 going for $2,450 at store.sun.com who would ever bother with a half suported stepchild?

Well, you can download the Solaris 8 iso images and burn your own CDs of it as well though.

Not so fast. According to a recent Slashback, Sun has pulled the Solaris operating environment for x86 computers from its download page.

That does move Sun into competition with the cheap x86 machines of today.

Nah, not since Sun came out with the Sun Blade 100. It's a real Unix workstation for only $950 and it takes standard PC memory and ISA hard drives.

Solaris is nowhere near free software. The Solaris 8 Foundation Source is only available under a revocable license that forbids redistribution and commercial use.