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Tux Works for Microsoft?!
Jadecristal writes: "From the contact info on the USB group contact page under Microsoft's record, one might get the impression that Tux worked for Microsoft. Perhaps he is being held against his will ... " Would any Microsoft employees care to disclose the whereabouts of a certain "Mr. Tux the penguin," and perhaps say which freezers he favors while in Redmond? Better yet, would any Microsoft employees like to comment on how many internal-to-Microsoft servers Mr. Tux currently powers?
Don't install win2k! Even if Tux dies, it's better to do as he would have wanted.
Go to Google.
Search for 666.
Can sombody explain this?
Once at the security office, Young and Coupland will release Jamie Zawinski, who will entice the guards to leave by offering them free passes to his nightclub (years of working at MS will ensure that they look angstful enough to get in).
The Dimension X people will probably be in the right uniform already. (Before MS bought them out to prevent them from enhancing Java too much, dnx.com was the alpha clique of alt.gothic.)
egg.microsoft.com used to report that it was running Apache/Linux (by Netcraft). It was used to host "internal projects and specifications". All the information on it was unprotected, but it was next to worthless things. Now on port 80, it just redirects you to www.microsoft.com and returns an Unknown/Unknown reply.
-- adraken
The central MS Security office is in building 8 in the south east corner. I grew up 2 miles from MS, got in trouble a few times for using their athletic fields after we ripped up the local public ones playing pickup footbal so badly you couldn't stand on them. Actually their security guys were pretty nice to us most of the time. :-)
I'm not sure that's really what's needed, In my html guide it says TT just does monospaced, it doesn't preserve spacing.
(you know, the truly scary part of this is that, if we really, really wanted to, we could organize and execute one of these little raids so fast Bill Gates' head would swim... vive l'Internet, ne-c'est-pas?)
--
Tar Heels don't run, Tennesseeans always Volunteer, and every Georgia boy knows his shotgun. Woe be to he who crosses the man who's all three. -- me
"And Texas gratefully remembers them all." -- Dillon Pyron, on t.p.guns
> hm. I wonder if MS has a 24/7 Slashdot monitor?
Not unless they're secretly running some systems with 24/7 stability.
(Sorry -- the devil made me say it!)
--
Sheesh, evil *and* a jerk. -- Jade
Bring along Signal 11 and a bunh of trolls as our rapid response team, so at the slightest sign of some motion, Signal 11 will write a long essay about how he agrees with whatever is being said, while the Trolls turn everything to stone.
Maybe we could offer a naked, stone Natalie Portman in exchange...
I can't believe I wrote that.. I've never mentioned NP in a message before! Ahhh... I feel the pull of the dark side!
Apparantly the joke's over. As of 7:48 am Wednesday 2000-03-01 the only contact information for Microsoft is Mark Williams.
My office has been taken over by iPod people.
>When Tux is located, he will be hustled into the
... :)
>parking lot where John Carmack will be waiting to
>speed away to safety at speeds well in excess of
>140 mph.
Dude, you forget:
- Carmack will come in a special Year-2000
limited-edition Ferrari Quakemobile
- Ultra-secret virtual reality technology
and some bad Hollywood movie producers will
be used to bring to life the Doom Marine,
the Quake guy, a few cyberdemons and imps
and maybe Sarge and Slash for some Q3A
action. And of course, they will run in
Nightmare mode with cheats disabled.
- Epic have promised to provide some Unreal
engine leg-ups so that we can watch the
whole thing in 32-bit color, 4096x3276@100fps
- John Romero will provide backup as long as he
can find that goddamn katana-sword-thing that
he lost in his hair 3 years ago.
- We are trying to contact friends at 3D Realms
to ask our friend Duke to help in the
ass-kicking ceremonies at Redmond. On a
related note, Bruce Campbell will take some
time out of his busy schedule to call up
BillG from the M$ front gate and ask him
to "come get some."
As much as I could manage
Y.
And if you ever think for a minute that they aren't watching you, all you have to do is open NetMon from the SMS2 distrobution, and normally you'll at least get some email wanting to know WHY you've got a packet capture utility on corporate LAN. They are fairly protective of their assets. :)
How VERY interesting. Seems they have less confidence in their own network security than they want the rest of us to have.
Lacking <sarcasm> tags,
It's the Open Source Militia! Cool, where do I sign up?
"A well debugged code base, being necessary to the security of a free operating system, the right of the people to use and modify source code, shall not be infringed."
Tom Swiss | the infamous tms | my blog
You cannot wash away blood with blood
OK, but how often are you tempted to test out the latest anti-Windoze exploit on every single Micro$oft box on your LAN? :-) (twinge.c comes to mind...)
"AC, linux is more important then you or me, or even Tux. There is only one thing we can do. We have to pull the plug."
OFTC: By the community, for the community
Win63K
Additionally, Tove will supply hand to hand training for the troops, and lead them into the building....
www.eFax.com are spammers
From the links on the page:
Company Name: Microsoft Corporation
Name: Mr. Tux The penguin
Title: Linux Mascot
Email: tux@linux.org
Phone#: 555.1212
Fax#: 555.1212
Cheers,
SuperG
Just so everyone like myself that said "Hey, what is with this Mark Williams guy, and what does /. mean about Tux???" knows, the page has been corrected.
I am sure news like this spread real fast and some M$ people were e-mailing the admin at usb.org...
Well, at least someone posted a screenshot here.
I think number 65,000 originates from ignorant reporters -- the actual number is 65,536 --remember old good 8086? So it proves that M$ lies about they're using all HW resources as protected mode, 3DNow, MMX, etc., as we can see they even can't break real mode 64K bound!
-- beginner thinks 1 Kb == 1000 bytes, master knows 1 Km == 1024 m.
Unless the new contact has some arcane connection to tux the penguin...the link has been fixed.
-FluX
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"It is seldom that liberty of any kind is lost all at once." -David Hume
"Would any Microsoft employees care to disclose the whereabouts of a certain "Mr. Tux the penguin," and perhaps say which freezers he favors while in Redmond?"
:)
Damn, if I was Tux, I'd favor 'em all. Anyone who's been to the campus knows that Microsoft has fridges and freezers stocked with sweet sweet sweet (end Simpsons allusion here) free drinks and food! Who said Microsoft was all that bad?
"Better yet, would any Microsoft employees like to comment on how many internal-to-Microsoft servers Mr. Tux currently powers?"
Well, I'm no microserf, but a relative is...and according to him, Microsoft does have some internal R&D Apache-running Linux boxes. Even though this isn't internal, Hotmail is being powered by a Unix box as well.
Now that's surprising!
--
The real Raunchola isn't cool enough to have any imposters
Tux with a gun to his head, and written underneath it: "BUY THIS OS OR WE SHOOT THE PENGUIN!!!!!!!" M$'s getting desperate...
I was oh what's the word...contracting at MS. I do AS/400 for that big three lettered company...Italian Buisness Men....There is a very large room at redmond that is full of Linux and Apple computers for the web site. Even the guys that work in the large room will not talk about the server to anyone. But just by looking at the monitors it is obvoius that they were NOT WindowsNT or simmilar OS's. The apple servers were that i biggest joke thought. At the time they were still not liking Apple very much...
...if there aren't enough Geeks With Guns alumni :-)
already volunteering, that is
>>esr>>
Did anyone see their vendor ID #?
Its 1118. As is readily apparent to anyone well versed in the satanic rituals, Shifted right by one in base 10, and then multiplied by 6 gives us.. *gasp* 666!
Therfore, it is obvious that Microsoft is planning a cultish execution for our flightless mascot. Perhaps an infiltration is in order...
Who the fsck moderated this as interesting??
Funny. Yes
Insiteful. Maybe (leaning toward yes)
underated. no not really
interesting. WTF??
"Hmmmm. Well tux how did you feel being trapped by the microsoft consort."
"Well Biff it was a pretty harrowing experience. honestly I've got to tell you at times it was a very insightful experence. I mean these microsoft guys can do the ctrl-alt-del vulcan nerve pince with only one finger, ALL AT THE SAME TIME! Guess they have practice, if you know what I mean (Nudge, Nudge). I mean these microsoft guys guys are a hoot, you should see Balmer's Gates impression.....
Oh I was trying to work overrated and interesting in there but you know what? 10 budweisers take there toll on the moter reflexes after a while. And its really not all that funny anyways.
"That's all the recycling daddy can do for one night dear...zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz"
Werd
The sole purpose of the Internet is to get porn and bomb making plans into the hands of children.
OK...this is off topic, I know. Moderate it down if you want to. Probably a good idea anyway... Maybe it's cause it's late and I'm still at work, or maybe it was just one too many of these 'slashdot isn't posting what I consider news for nerds' posts, but either way.. here goes.
/. If you don't like the articles, don't visit the page! What stupid sick pleasure do you get out of writing 'this posting sucks'? You not only took the time to read the story, but more time to write your useless comments on a subject that you supposedly don't care about. Here's a thought...If you don't like the stories, don't come back. Or come back less often. If the people in charge of slashdot see the number of hits dropping, they will get the idea that a number of people don't like what they have been posting lately.
Jon,
Your ceaseless barrage of non "news for nerds" and non "stuff that matters" articles are driving me up the wall!@#!
Jon Katz must go!
Firstly, not that it really matters, but Jon Kats didn't post this article. If you want to yell at someone, at least pick the right person.
Secondly, (and more importantly), no-one is making you read
Alternatively, you could form a well crafted letter stating why you feel that a certain story or type of story does not belong on slashdot. Send that letter as an email to Mr Kats, or whoever you feel is appropriate, and try to effect real change.
Simply posting a flame message saying Jon Kats must go! is about as intellegent as selling winblows at a Linux conference, and is likely to be about as well recieved.
Looks like someone cracked into USB.org's member area and had some fun. USB's home page indicates that they're changing all members passwords as of today for "security reasons".
Still, it would be nice to think at least one server in the microsoft.com domain is running a Linux kernel and Apache. You can just close your eyes and imagine the MS techies standing around the screen looking for NT server manager.....
thehermit
Contact Information - Press Contact
Company Name Microsoft Corporation
Name Mark Williams
Title
Email markwi@microsoft.com
Phone # 425-936-1964
Fax # 425-936-7329
i personally don't think they needed the help...
Company Name Microsoft Corporation
/. does not support tags.
Name Mr. Tux The penguin
Title Linux Mascot
Email tux@linux.org
Phone # 555.1212
Fax # 555.1212
Those bastards! Thats it, the next kernel should be named Bill_Gates!!!!!!
Sorry about the repetition. I just learned the hard way that
I suppose by now it is now well known that Tux was actually sent in, and has been working as a spy. It is quite unfortunate (to say the least) that he was captured, but then again, I can't say I'm surprised it happened.
Perhaps the policy of GPL-ing top-secret documents and spy communiqués should be reviewed and revised.
.sig last updated Jan. 14, 2000
find ~/.netscape/cache -not -type d -exec grep --with-filename [Tt]ux '{}' ';'
Post this as informative...because it's a good tip about how to find stuff-- Why is there blue shit all over MY shit?! -Josh in Blair Witch Project
www.usb.org is a BSD box (BSDI/OS, IIRC). Given the syntax of the URLs for drilling down to the contact records, it looks like the info might be in some sort of X.500-style directory, probably LDAP, or maybe NDS or Active Directory. Possibly with a default or blank Root DN password, or some other such dopey move.
If I didn't have to get some sleep, I'd check to see if I could get to it on the default LDAP port, seeing as telnet is open on the box.
The sysadmin there needs to be bonked on the head with a stick.
I just recieved a ransom note. It reads:
"pleeze put m1cr0s0ft wind0ze 2000 on all y0r bawks3z 0r eye will k1ll tha p3nquin -mr gat3s-"
I think it's Bill, but given the spelling and grammar, it may be our own CmdrTaco
For obvious reasons, I'm posting this as AC... :)
:) People actually stop by my cube to talk Tux every now and then. MS isn't so anti-penguin as everyone leads everyone else to believe.
:)
I have to admit that the evil empire helps pay my rent on the 1st and the 15th of every month, but as I haven't seen anyone else step up and admit it, I will admit that I have a Slackware 7.0 box running on MS's network. The smb packages are your friend for connecting to domains and actually being able to get to all those nifty shares.
MS even has a "Linux User Discussion" public folder in Outlook where the occassional question about "how do I get my box on the LAN, etc." gets fielded by several of us. If any other MS employees are running a box, we'd sure love to hear from you!
Remember the last story about the USB Forum? The one where people figured out various username/password combinations that had not been changed from the defaults...
http://pangaea.dhs.org/tux.gif
You can also get the TIFF file if you really want to see it in 24 bpp color.
---
chahast at pangaea dot dhs dot org
Here's Plan 0.8:
Possible bugs with this plan include both the possibility that Coupland isn't actually serious about the OSS movement and will bail at the first sign of trouble and the chance that JWZ will bail before the operation is concluded. Patches to these problems are welcome.----
Every year during my review, I just pray the words "slashdot.org" aren't mentioned.
Now while MS is busy, the Linux team will enter the compound, crash the WinCE running microsoft's security alarms and door locks by setting the date back to 12-31-99 and letting the clock roll over again, or by installing Explorer 5.0 or better yet, AOL Titanium. We will then move to the freezer section where the penguin is being held, free him, and get out before the crashed windows machines catch fire and fill the building with smoke. Stallman, (yes sir!) if there's time, you will go to the legal dept's office and replace the MS EULA with a copy of the GPL. And Young (yes sir!) you swap out the Win2K master CD on the assembly line with a Red Hat 6.3 distro cd.
Ok, break!
Well, some mail does actually make it out of Redmond, so clearly not all their servers run NT.
But alas the Penguin just can't deliver the goods when it comes to really demanding services like BSOD. And, contrary to the usual bad press about Windows availability, the NT-based BSOD service boasts a 99.9% availability record over 5 years, totally unparalleled in the industry. Try beating that, Tux!!
;-)
"The question of whether machines can think is no more interesting than [] whether submarines can swim" - Dijkstra
Looks like someone managed to rescue Tux. And replace him with Mark Williams.
So Gates has been misquoted all these years.
"64K (bugs) should be enough for anybody."
- B. Gates
zeke
Who do you think was responsible for the 65,000+ bugs in Win2K, fools??? And now you've blown his cover!!!
Harvey