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The Funniest Joke in the World
Tackhead writes: "In another example of life imitating Monty Python, this article on nature.com says that the British Association for the Advancement of Science has created Laugh Lab, a project designed to find the funniest joke in the world. Weaponization possibilities are not discussed. Yet."
Without a doubt, the joke is British and Americans won't get it.
And one of them was assaulted.
Peanut.
Yes. And if you read the site, that's what it's all about. They want to see which jokes affect the most people. In addition, they will divide people by age, gender, etc. to see which types of jokes the groups tend to like. The "funniest joke in the nation [not world, as Slashdot would have you believe]" stuff is just sort of a gimmick they're tacking on to get people's attention.
Donate background CPU time to fight cancer.
...I always remember the joke Freud used as an example in one of his works.
Why is a wife like an umbrella?
Because some days you want to take a cab.
Hmmmm.
~~~~~ BigLig2? You mean there's another one of me?
All this so a bunch of scientists get some new material for when they go to a party?
The search for a sense of humour continues...
An elderly couple were walking about the streets of their home, Moscow. They each feel drops of moisture on their faces. The man says that it is snowing, but his wife is convinced that it's raining. Finally, they see General Rudolph walking by, and the woman calls him over to settle the dispute. The general says it's definitely rain. The man doesn't believe him. Sighing, his wife tells him, "Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."
A farmer had a problem. His rooster was growing old and didn't do his responsibilities as well as in his young days. So the farmer went and bought a new rooster to fill in.
The new rooster went all cocky to the old one and said: "Ok old timer. I'm the man in this house, so you'd better get your feathers out of here."
The old one didn't feel like giving up that easily so he challenged the new rooster for a race: "Let's run 20 laps around the henhouse. The faster wins and the loser leaves."
As the new rooster was confident of his speed, the two went outside and a hen gave them the start signal.
The old rooster sprinted and got ahead with the new rooster tightly after him.
The old rooster was leading after 1st lap.
The old rooster was still ahead after the 2nd lap.
On the 3rd lap there was a loud BANG and the new rooster flew against the henhouse wall in a big clowd of feathers. The farmer lowered his shotgun and muttered: "That'll be the last gay rooster in this house."
Remember the Far Side panel featuring a lab designed to test crankiness in people? Very funny.
Donate background CPU time to fight cancer.
Jay Leno (a comedian in the U.S.) makes $40,000 for perhaps 90 minutes of comedy. And Jay Leno is not very funny.
Obviously, if those studying the "science" of comedy knew anything about it, they would be out doing it, and not hanging around in a musty university drawing professor pay.
Bush's education improvements were
*ahem*
Wenn ist das Nunstuck git und Slotermeyer? Ja! Beiherhund das Oder die
Flipperwaldt gersput!
dave "and now for comething completely different"
Q) How many Software Engineers does it take to change a lightbulb ?
A) None, it's a harware problem!
My last project was to help design the database of all the jokes.
It was quite a project and actually quite enlightening. It's amazing to hear all the jokes you once heard that made fun of people from Arkansas, being retold about people from Newfoundland or wherever.
Once we got the data consolidated, we were able categorize them and set a primary key for each joke. This was particularly effective because the jokes could be then referred to (and even enjoyed) merely by referring to the primary key. (And any variant information.)
For example, "6653 - Newfie" would take the base text,
6653 - "Why did the $Disparaged_ethnic_groupmember put tinfoil on his nose?"
and insert the variant information.
After work, we'd head to the pub and hoist a few pints, retelling our favorites, only needing to use the number.
"37684!" someone would shout and the rest of the group would laugh.
"238!" and people would be rolling on the floor...
One night, Dr. Wiseman stands up and says "6245!"
Dead silence. Thinking, he again tries. "6245?"
Again, dead silence.
Dejected, he sat down and stared into his Guinness and mutters: "I never *could* tell a joke..."
;-)
(Sorry, I couldn't resist. )
Jim
-- My Weblog.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Interrupting Cow.
Inter-
MOO!
Any sufficiently well-organized community is indistinguishable from Government.
Can't remember where I heard this one, but there ya go:
A drunk walks into a bar and says to the bartender (with a drunken slur), "bartender, buy everyone in the house a drink, pour yourself one, and give me the bill."
So, the bartender does just that and hands the man a bill for $37.00.
The drunk says, "I haven't got it."
The bartender slaps the guy around a few times then threw him out into the street.
The very next day the same drunk walks into the bar and once again says (with a drunken slur), "Bartender, buy everyone in the house a drink, pour yourself one, and give me the bill."
The bartender looks at the guy and figures to himself that he can't possibly be stupid enough to pull the same trick twice, so he gives him the benefit of the doubt, pours a round of drinks for the house, has a drink himself and hands the drunk a bill for $37.00.
The drunk says, "I haven't got it." The bartender can't believe it, so he picks the guy up, beats the living day lights out of him, then throws him out into the street.
The next day the same drunk walks back into the same bar and says (with a drunken slur), "bartender, buy every one in the house a drink, give me the bill." In disgust the bartender says, "what, no drink for me this time?"
The drunk replies, "No, you get violent when you drink."
It doesn't mean much now, it's built for the future.
(These work best when told between two people (i.e., aloud))
What's brown and sticky?
A stick!
What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!
*ducks rotting vegetables*
(I think we need a -1, Not Funny moderation...)