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New Cube controller
steveo777 writes: "I was surfing through IGN when I noticed this new controller. It made me fall off my chair laughing (people at work are wondering what could be so funny). But it's no joke. Aparently it's for Phantasy Star Online." If this isn't real, why not? Something like this looks like a great idea to me.
My big problem with this controller is, when I throw it at my television in frustration, it might break something.
I hope they work hard to keep the weight down. Maybe it's made of carbon fiber?
I'll have to grow some longer arms before I can even reach both sides of the controller at once, but hey, once I do, PSO will be taking up even more of my time!
The page asks is the thing can be held. Of course it can... space your hands about 1 feet away from each other in the air, palms facing each other.
Ok... now start twindling your fingers as if you're playing a game!
Ok, got it? Seems comfortable enough doesn't it? Ok, now scream something you'd scream during game play. Like "COME ON! I HAD THAT!" while moving the imaginary controller around like a mad man.
There you go!
Congratulations!
You successfully look like an idiot.
So would you type with your nose?
Get rid of the sticks on each side and
let the user type JKL; to move about
like any other good game.
No, that's only for the X-Box version.
Schwab
Editor, A1-AAA AmeriCaptions
You can tell this is for children friendly market! No one-handed typing :(
Posted by timothy on Tuesday October 16, @07:31PM
from the largeness-of-cock dept.
Jeff Probst writes: "I was surfing through goatse.cx when I noticed this new giver. It made me fall off my chair laughing (people at work are wondering what could be so funny). But it's no joke. Apparently it's for the receiver." If this isn't real, why not? Something like this looks like a great idea to me.
I remember every Christmas when younger, I could tell which were gameboy games, NES games, then came SuperNES or Genesis packages under the Xmas tree. I knew the exact weight, size and shape of each console game package. Wow, I think this honkin thing might make me think my parents got me a baseball bat or soemthing.
It sure would throw me off, if this monster comes bundled with PSO that is...
"It takes many nails to build a crib, but one screw to fill it."
I work as a sysadmin, and one of my guilty pleasures is tossing out old equiptment :) We have a raised loading dock, and adjacent to the loading dock is our (not raised) steel garbage bins ...
It was a particularaly (sp?) good day because I got to toss out some old macs (I don't really care for them) on the docket was an old quadra 990 (IIRC) and 2 of those *REALLY* old B/W 20+ inch monitors ... so ya gotta imagine Im close to 6' tall, and the trashcans are 3' below my feet, so I topple a monitor from my cart down into the empty trash bin and it makes a fantastic noise but dosen't break! So I pickup the second monitor, raise it above my head, and throw it down into the bin, it makes a terrible noise, still, tube is intact ... by this time im uber pissed so I grab the quadra (and its not a dinky one either, its one of those early 90's dealies with the thick aluminum cases) and I throw it as hard as I can at the two monitors! ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG! they still didn't break :)
By this time, everyone in the parking lot is staring at me :) People have come out of their upstairs offices all to see what the 3 loud bangs were ... defeated, so I pack up my cart and head inside :)
Free Techno/Jazz/DNB/MI Music by guys obsessed with monkeys!
So is the controller going to be called "The Dvorak" or "The American Simplified"?
From the press release:
The KeyMouse XP is the worlds first mouse to integrate a 120 key keyboard inside a mouse. This gives the user the advantage of not having to switch between keyboard and mouse - a repetitive movement which costs the user time and productivity.
The keyboard is located between the left and right mouse buttons.
When asked how difficult this new mouse would be to handle Logitech would only say that the user would need a really big-ass mousepad.
"They do not preach that their god will rouse them, a little before the Nuts work loose." Kipling, 'The Sons of Martha'
Mario is standing in front of a pipe.
> Jump inside pipe
You can't reach it!
> Walk east
You've reached a dead end.
> Walk south
Mario fell off the platform! Play again?
> q
Goodbye!
Uh, right.
"Okay! Alpha team approach the base from the west! Beta, provide sniper cover and be prepared to fall back on defense!"
<pause>
--
TeamLeader says: "Hooray! Alpo tea map roach debase Rama vest. Bay techno wide sighter cove randy pee pear two sell bacon desense!"
--
(BTW - this is my 200th post! )
Cheers,
Jim in Tokyo
-- My Weblog.
People say the X-Box controller is big...
But remember its not the size of your controler but how you use it...
"And doesnt "This is not a joke." make it an even more obvious joke?"
No, the phrase "This is not a joke" makes me think it is not a joke.
PERSON1: "There's a guy somewhere round here with a gun shooting stuff up. This is not a joke"
PERSON2: "Oh, I get it! hahahahah-"
**BLAM!**
PERSON1: "Stupid *&^%&@"
BTW, for just one os many sites that sells ASCII controllers, Try here
"Nine times out of ten, starting a fire is not the best way to solve the problem." - my wife
I would love to play this game on my new 100" TV!
-------------------
rm -rf
This keyboard/controller looks like a pretty sound idea, and holding it in your lap does indeed seem to be the intended method of operation...which is all good and fine, but underneath all this is the question of "Why do consoles insist on keeping their beloved D-Pad and thumb buttons?"
If you have a keyboard in front of you, you can navigate throughout the game without any additional controller foolishness on the sides. The keyboard alone can more than cover all the functions of any game pad. WASD for motion/navigating menus, plenty of keys to replace controller buttons, etc.
Also, for the height of console adventure/PRG tedium, fire up Raiders of the Lost Ark on your Atari 2600, and take joy in finding that one joystick is for moving Dr. Jones, and another is required to manipulate your inventory! Little brothers are finally useful for something!
Leveling up builds character.
http://www.somethingawful.com/news/8-28-2000/ninte ndo/controller.jpg
Men believe what they want. - Caesar
>
> below my feet
If you're lifting them like that, those aren't the *old* ones. . . .
I had an Ehman 19" back in 1989 for my SE/30. Moving it around was done by staggering, not walking.
When it went bad, I sent it back under warranty. They told me to send it back in the original packing material? Huh? I explained that it came on a shipping pallet with a sheet of cardboard wrapped around it and a boxtop over that, all strapped together. He groaned. "Oh, one of those".
hawk, who still prefers greyscale to color