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Terminator 3: Attack of the Terminatrix
jinx_ was among many who wrote in to say: "Arnold Schwarzenegger" is back for another installment of the Terminator Franchise. Reportedly a $30 million payday for Arnold.
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Are they actually going to make this a Politically Correct type of movie? A Terminatrix? Or did they just need a reason for a sex scene?
It just seems funny. The first movie had an obvious heroine and hero; they both served their roles and made the audience happy by creating a loving relationship while also doing neat action sequences and screaming as a strange, mechanized killer attacked them. But this?
Possible Plot:
Terminatrix Seduction:
The entire plot of the movie rests in the fact that a 20-something male, as commented in the article, has absolutely no power over his... organs... and will fall easily into the hands of an incredily beautiful woman who asks him on a rather cordial date. I don't see how she could lose with this strategy.
Terminatrix-PC:
A new black Conner (to try to promote gender equality) is paired with Jackie Chan and Arnold Schwartz to provide the ultimate in "inclusive" casting. The Terminatrix will have the ability to morph into whatever type of socially unrepresented class happens to present itself, allowing for quick and easy resolution of unsatisfied audience demographic.
LOL... Someone get Jenna Jameson on the phone and let her know we have a mainstream movie role for her.
Every year during my review, I just pray the words "slashdot.org" aren't mentioned.
Wow, they're going to need some amazing make-up artists! Old robots might rust, but they won't wrinkle! ;)
For $30 million, Arnold Schwarzenegger will play the Terminatrix in drag.
A robot must protect the existence of the movie franchise as long as it does not conflict with the First or Second (or Zeroth) Law.
/. is irrelevant.
"I'll be back... just after I get this hip replacement"
"Arnold Schwarzenegger" is "back" to do "Terminator 3". This should be "good".
NO CARRIER
my guess is that transparency or super-camoflage will be T3 feature.
The Teminatrix's secret weapon? Alpha Blending!!! I wonder if she'll have an nVidea logo on her forhead.
Get J.Lo to be the Terminatrix... she's already got a huge heat-sink of an ass
(stop me before I joke again....)
No need to put away that PDP-11 just yet, they've got a text friendly version too.
There's always a whiner in the crowd.
The line must be drawn here. This far. No further.
We can work it out logically. IIRC it went like this:
T1 - Arnie is trying to kill John Conner
T2 - Arnie is trying to save John Connor
The only logical conclusion is that in T3, Arnie is completely indifferent to the fate of John Connor.
This sig made only from recycled ASCII
Nonononono! No!
T3: Arnold IS John Connor!
"Search your feelings John. You know this to be true!"
Boobies. The robot will have boobies. Big, bouncy ones, hopefully.
The perfect movie for a typical Hollywood starlet... they can be full of silicone, but she can still say they are real.
Religion is the opiate of the masses. The wealthy smoke the real stuff.
that's rediculous.
Everyone knows that a T3 will be 28.7 times better than T1. Just look at the number of individual channels.
~z
sig?
The overall cost of bringing "T3" to the screen has reportedly been placed at $165 million to $180 million, which would easily eclipse the record $135 million believed spent to make "Pearl Harbor."
Star Peep
Dateline: Costner Ranch
Kevin Costner has issued a statement concerning the new "Terminator" movie's record-breaking budget of $165-$180 million.
"$180 million is NOTHING compared to my new movie. Just as we did in Waterworld and the Postman, we will break new ground in budgetary extravagance with my offering of the "Sanitationer!" This 5 hour opus details the struggle of an Assistant Sidewalk Sanitizer to uphold the American Dream in the face of a Post-Apocalyptic Breakdown of the United States Government due to Electronic Piracy. The movie will follow him, (played by me, Kevin Costner), from his first day on the street, to his final, gloriously uplifting confrontation with the bad guy. We are up to $249 million, and we haven't even added the bazookas yet!"
When asked if the job of a Assistant Sidewalk Sanitizer was picking up dog droppings, he replied, "Well, at first it is."
--
"Outlook not so good." That magic 8-ball knows everything! I'll ask about Exchange Server next.
I think he could play a PROTOSS. Would be a good movie too.
Who'd play Kerrigan?
Let's not stir that bag of worms...
Good point -- I just wrote "rampaging cyborg" into my Disaster Recovery plans. It's right after "alien invasion" (Use the PowerBook[TM] to defeat them) and right before "irradiated lizard-beast" (Send in the paleontologist). Here's hoping the suits sign off.
They that would sacrifice their
The human's finally beat the machines once and for all with their deadly secret weapon... /. effect!
The
I stole this Sig
...as a bunch of horny, nerdy, male adolescents. Who else would wank over a "Terminatrix" (undoubtedly to be played by some pretty actress with large bosoms and little talent; q. v. _Tomb Raider_), but the same crowd for whom Seven of Nine was written into "Voyager".
Cheers,
hyacinthus.
"Only in re-runs..."
"Tomorrow's forecast: a few sprinkles of genius with a chance of doom!" - Stewie Griffin
Under this hypothetical genre, you could do something nutty like relax the constraints of historical accuracy and current scientific understanding in order to optimize for other, non-engineering attributes like drama, tension, and the progression of a storyline even though fundamental carrying particles for these forces are yet to be generated at Fermilab.
There might be value in presenting "stories" in this new "fictional" way, so long as people are made to understand that they're "just movies" and that they shouldn't take them so "seriously" and that nobody but nobody confuse a movie theatre with a library. (*)
Just a thought.
(*) hint: both theatres and libraries are louder places than they used to be, but in general, the theater is the one with the sticky floor and the THX sound system.