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Annual NORAD Santa Tracker Up And Running

Posted by ryuzaki0 on from the gentleman-get-me-the-president-on-the-horn dept.

SumDeusExMachina writes: "NORAD is at it once again folks! You can track Santa as he travels across the globe via a nifty Real Media stream." Apparently, this guy has been making some changes up North, too, including stealth technology, so I hope the radar tracks.

16 of 176 comments (clear)

  1. Nice treat for young kids in the new age by buff_pilot · · Score: 4, Funny

    My 4 year old daughter was spun up due to all the Christmas excitement. We were having trouble getting her to sleep until we showed her where santa was on the map - he's getting close! So off to bed she went without a peep.

    1. Re:Nice treat for young kids in the new age by mwillems · · Score: 3, Funny

      My 7 year old son just went through the same. Go to www.cnn.com and follow the "Norad tracks Santa" link. Finally, a use for tracking technology!

      --

      ---
      BDOS ERR ON A:>
    2. Re:Nice treat for young kids in the new age by matrix29 · · Score: 5, Funny

      My 4 year old daughter was spun up due to all the Christmas excitement. We were having trouble getting her to sleep until we showed her where santa was on the map - he's getting close! So off to bed she went without a peep.

      Dad: "See little Susie, there's Santa and he's heading right for us."

      Susie: "Thank you daddy. I love you." (Kisses father on the cheek and goes off to bed followed by her brother)

      Older brother: "Susie."

      Susie: "What?"

      Brother: "NORAD tracks nuclear missles. Something is heading for our house and it's measured by megaton nuclear detonations and our entire town painfully burning to radioactive cinders. Goodnight Susie."

      Susie: "?!?" "?!?" "!!!" "DAD!!!"

      (And this is supposed to make children comfortable - HOW?!?)

      --
      "Face it, a nation that maintains a 72% approval rating on George W. Bush is a nation with a very loose grip on reality.
    3. Re:Nice treat for young kids in the new age by Chester+K · · Score: 4, Funny

      What are the privacy implications of this? I mean, it's beyond question that the benefits of such powerful tracking benefit children the world over, but are we one step away from this technology being used on us?

      Will some day Big Brother turn to the "NORAD Tracks Chester K" website to find out where I am? I shiver at the thought. We need to write our Senators and Representatives and alert them to this horrible encroachment on our privacy -- this powerful tracking techonology must be shackled to prevent illicit use by the government.

      Fnord. Merry Christmas!

      --

      NO CARRIER
  2. How can you track santa? by PepsiProgrammer · · Score: 4, Funny
    Everyone knows santa uses the principals of quantum mechanics to be in every house at the same time delivering gifts.

    How would tracking by radar be possible?

    --
    "The United States has no right, no desire, and no intention to impose our form of government on anyone else." - Bush 05
    1. Re:How can you track santa? by MegaGremlin · · Score: 4, Funny

      Which explains why he can't come if your awake. If you see him, He'll be stuck at your house.

      --

      .sig
  3. Oh dear, it's getting worse by J.D.+Hogg · · Score: 2, Funny

    And you thought it was bad enough when Matthew Broderick messed up the WOPR, now the damn mainframe is going completely gaga ...

  4. From CNN... by ktakki · · Score: 5, Funny

    From CNN:

    WASHINGTON (CNN) -- U.S. military officials are tracking Santa's travel path and reporting the latest data on his location on a Web site.

    "If he deviates from his filed flight plan or turns off his transponder, we're prepared to scramble F-15s from Langley AFB, Eglin AFB, Mountain Home AFB, Elmendorf AFB, Tyndall AFB, and Nellis AFB, and blow that fat bastard out of the skies," said NORAD spokesman Gen. Buck Turgidson.

    In addition, Gen. Turgidson stated that there would be a limited test of National Missile Defense (NMD) tracking assets at various locations around the country. "Santa can deploy all the decoys he wants. We'll find him, we'll track him, we'll get him," Gen. Turgidson added.

    Military analysts have mentioned possible countermeasures Santa Claus might take to avoid NORAD radar, including a low-altitude, terrain-masking flight profile, radar-absorbant coating on his sleigh, and multiple layers of metal foil on Rudolph's nose to lessen the infrared signature.

    k.

    --
    "In spite of everything, I still believe that people are really good at heart." - Anne Frank
  5. Re: Making Changes up North by SpringRevolt · · Score: 5, Funny

    Well, if it was me choosing an OS to organize a bunch of reindeer, I would have to trust to instinct and run with the Hurd.

    (Groan: -1 Corny :-)

  6. Re:New NP Technology by SumDeusExMachina · · Score: 3, Funny
    He doesn't even need to slip down any more chimmneys and risk getting stuck (or burned).

    Heh, reminds me of a Calvin and Hobbes comic where Calvin walks in on a roaring fireplace and douses it with a fire extinguisher screaming "WHAT'S THIS? SANTA FLAMBE?!"

    --

    Is your company running tools written by ma
  7. Damn /. editors! by nyet · · Score: 5, Funny

    I thought /. was a REAL news source! How unprofessional! They didn't bother to do any fact checking on this story... I found out through a friend that Santa doesn't actually exist.

    Shame on you.

  8. i have scientifical evidence he doesn't exist!! by MoceanWorker · · Score: 2, Funny

    Santa does not exist!!

    This is probably the best way to explain to your kids that he doesn't exist... i guess you could use this for the Easter rabbit as well :-\

    --


    "The ones who dont do anything are always the ones who try to pull you down" -- Henry Rollins
  9. Santa? Or SATAN? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny
    Santa Claus may be good fun for non-Christian children everywhere, but have you ever stopped to consider the effect that Santa's popularity has had on Jesus? Yes, Jesus Christ, who died for your sins and makes julienne fries, is now forced to wander the streets begging for spare change like some sort of Perl programmer.

    So when you're opening your shiny gifts from Santa tomorrow morning, think of Jesus. He's probably going to get frostbite for your sins, and then have to have his feet amputated for your sins, and go on prescription painkillers while receiving federal welfare for your sins. You fuckers!

    -- The_Messenger

  10. Easy... by DAldredge · · Score: 2, Funny

    I know this is a foreign concept to a lot of parents today, but what you do is spank the brother when he is bad, then he will not act so bad most of the time...

  11. Re:Email I got. by AlterEd · · Score: 5, Funny

    Took the time? They're tracking Santa Claus, do you really think they didn't know where you were before you sent the email? ;-)

    --

    Ed Chauvin IV
  12. Re:Email I got. by nEoN+nOoDlE · · Score: 3, Funny

    They probably even checked the list twice.

    --
    Don't trust a bull's horn, a doberman's tooth, a runaway horse or me.