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Kathleen Fent Read This Story

Posted by ryuzaki0 on from the typed-with-one-pair-of-sweating-palms dept.

Kathleen, I wanted to do this in this most potentially embarassing way possible, and I figured doing it here and now, in front of a quarter of a million strangers was as good a way as any. I love you more then I can describe within the limits of this tiny little story. We've been together for many years now, and I've known for most of that time that I wanted to spend my life with you. Enough rambling. Will you marry me? Update 15 minutes 30 seconds later: Subj: "Yes", message body: "Dork. You made me cry. :)" Hazah! I'm getting married! :)

62 of 2,019 comments (clear)

  1. Sure by elfkicker · · Score: 5, Funny

    Go for it... he's rich.

    1. Re:Sure by Rupert · · Score: 5, Funny

      Depends on how soon he was allowed to divest his VA stock.

      Oh, and Taco, based on my experience of marriage,
      pants will no longer be optional.

      --

      --
      E_NOSIG
    2. Re:Sure by Syberghost · · Score: 5, Funny

      Depends on how soon he was allowed to divest his VA stock.

      The good news is, he did it on time. The bad news is, he spent it all on Enron stock.

      I'm not as impressed that he asked her in a /. story as I am that he left comments turned on. That took balls, man. :-)

    3. Re:Sure by CheechBG · · Score: 5, Funny

      ah, but that the beauty of geek marriages, instead of a antiquated ring, he could just buy her something a little more utilitarian, like, say, a Beowulf cluster of...

      I'm just going to stop there :P

      Congratulations, Rob.

    4. Re:Sure by thoughtcrime · · Score: 5, Funny

      Nah, he won't go for anything fancy. Probably just a token ring.

      *runs*

      --

      ____ _______
      Duty now for the future!
  2. Well Hell... by delcielo · · Score: 5, Funny

    We really should have given her first post.

    --
    Hot Damn! It's the Soggy Bottom Boys!
  3. Aw crap! by jehreg · · Score: 5, Funny
    *I* was gonna ask her...

    I guess he "first post" me...

  4. The real question by Carmody · · Score: 5, Funny

    If you two get married, will you be all propritary towards her, or will she be open source?

    --
    God is real unless declared integer
    1. Re:The real question by darkov · · Score: 5, Funny

      I don't thing he would be happy about everybody "embracing and extending" her.

      --
      Reliable, Great Value Hosting: $7.95/mo 2.4G/120G
    2. Re:The real question by Anne_Nonymous · · Score: 5, Funny

      I think this is one case where "open source" would lead to "open sores". Yuk!

  5. Frodo by underclocked · · Score: 5, Funny

    One ring to rule them all?

  6. You know he loves you by OpenGLFan · · Score: 5, Funny

    because he spell-checked this post.

  7. Prenuptial Agreements by DohDamit · · Score: 5, Funny

    1. No, you will not call him Commander. Or Taco.

    2. He will not make you metamoderate during sex. It's just not right.

    3. Cowboyneal is NOT allowed to sleep at the foot of the bed.

    4. He has to leave work at work. No logging in from home.

    5. You will not be the subject of various polls.

    and finally,

    6. No open-sourcing bedtalk!

    Best of wishes.

  8. i submitted this story three days ago!! by krog · · Score: 5, Funny

    hey, how come you rejected this when i posted it?!

    --
    Cretin - a powerful and flexible CD reencoder
  9. This Kathleen? by briggsb · · Score: 5, Informative

    A quick google search turned up this image....

  10. Be careful.... by tjhayes · · Score: 5, Funny

    Once you get married, all your base are belong to her.

  11. More information on Kathleen Fent by Bryan_Casto · · Score: 5, Informative

    Yeah, like us geeks weren't going to find this... Sarcasta.Net
    Pics

    --

    Bryan J. Casto
    bryan.casto(a)gmail.com
  12. No! You fool! by ZaMoose · · Score: 5, Funny

    Go back while you still can! You have no idea what you're in for when you ge....

    What? No, honey, I'm just typing a message on Slashdot. Yes dear, I'll take the garbage out.

    --
    I wish I had a kryptonite cross, because then you could keep Dracula and Superman away.
  13. her answer? by Alien54 · · Score: 5, Funny
    He controls the eyes and collective IQs for a quarter million geeks!

    Well there is the issue of if IQ goes down in proportion to the size of the mob times the average intelligence.

    For example, an individual scientist might be brilliant, but a group of them can be pretty dumb.

    On this basis, the collective IQ around here has got to be heading into negative numbers.

    [Joke! Joke!]

    Of course, we are all waiting to see if

    1) she replies in this forum,
    2) if the reply is moderated to 5+.
    3) Or will it go to -1 as redundant

    --
    "It is a greater offense to steal men's labor, than their clothes"
  14. Are you compatible? by scruffy · · Score: 5, Funny
    Before you make a decision that will last the rest of your life, you need to review the following issues. If you disagree on two or more of them, the chances of a successful marriage are slim to none.

    Unix or Windows?

    Free or Proprietary?

    DMCA or Fair Use?

    Vi or Emacs?

    GPL or BSD?

    Gnome or KDE?

    C or C++ or Java or C# or ...?

    Linux or GNU/Linux?

  15. Clarification... by MaxVlast · · Score: 5, Funny

    "Kathleen, I wanted to do this in this most potentially embarassing way possible"

    The real question is embarrassing for you or for her? =)

    --
    There should be a moratorium on the use of the apostrophe.
    Max V.
    NeXTMail/MIME Mail welcome
    1. Re:Clarification... by wo1verin3 · · Score: 5, Funny

      It's embarassing for us!

      My non-geek gf wanted to know what I was reading so I showed her. The response was.

      : too bad i'm not kathleen fent

      Thanks Taco...although this is the first time a geek web site ever got someone more sex (you), this is screwing me over. She wants to know why I didn't do something like this. I explained the story got rejected, but she doesn't believe me :(

      CONGRATS TACO :P

  16. Answer by Merry_B.Buck · · Score: 5, Funny

    If you propose on ./, is she allowed to answer "CowboyNeal"?

  17. I *should* have gotten First Post! by kathleen · · Score: 5, Informative

    Yes.

    1. Re:I *should* have gotten First Post! by CmdrTaco · · Score: 5, Funny

      Nah... this way you're on topic and you should get a load of karma.

      --
      Pants are still optional, but recommended for you.
    2. Re:I *should* have gotten First Post! by km790816 · · Score: 5, Funny

      *sniff*, *sniff*, *lip quiver*...this is so beautiful

      So is it KathleenTaco now?

      --
      A speech...
    3. Re:I *should* have gotten First Post! by chrysrobyn · · Score: 5, Funny

      Nah... this way you're on topic and you should get a load of karma. --- Pants are still optional, but recommended for you. I knew there was a reason to leave .sigs on. Is it me or is this .sig funny in this context?

    4. Re:I *should* have gotten First Post! by infinite9 · · Score: 5, Funny

      Actually, CmdrTaco should change his name now. It doesn't look too good being married and being known as "command her taco".

      --
      Disconnect your television. Do your own research. Draw your own conclusions. They're probably lying. Don't be a sheep.
    5. Re:I *should* have gotten First Post! by Iamthefallen · · Score: 5, Funny

      "Moderation Totals: Troll=1, Informative=5, Overrated=1, Total=7."

      Troll? Overrated?! Man, slashdot moderators are TOUGH!

      Congrats you two, best of luck!

      --
      Wax-Museum Fire Results In Hundreds Of New Danny DeVito Statues
    6. Re:I *should* have gotten First Post! by Rogerborg · · Score: 5, Interesting

      Well, it was your first post. I always wondered what would finally provoke you into it. Now we know. ;-)

      To those wondering, user #570 is indeed Kathleen, according to a page at sarcasta.net (that I admittedly can't find right now). It was along the lines of "I have never posted to slashdot, and I never intend to, so anyone claiming to be me is an imposter. If I ever do post, it will be as user #570"

      Incidentally, I once posted a suggestion in a story Slashdot's owners running out of money that they could always set up a sarcasta ho cam, linking to the "bountiful bosum" picture. It was modded down savagely as Offtopic, by moderators who clearly had no idea what I was on about. Vindicated! Ah hahahahaha! Now we're all going to be panting after Cmdr Taco's squeeze. You lucky, lucky bastard. ;-)

      --
      If you were blocking sigs, you wouldn't have to read this.
  18. Re:Are you serious? by redwing25 · · Score: 5, Funny

    I hope the our editors will keep out any "Whoops, duplicate posts" of this one!

  19. Re:emails out the butt by DeputySpade · · Score: 5, Funny

    No... SHE will be getting mail asking if she wants HIS penis to grow 12 inches.

    --


    This space intentionally left blank
  20. User Number 570, probably the Real Kathleen :-) by Raindeer · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Congratulations

    --
    Use Adsense for Charity
  21. We've been together for many years now, and... by ekrout · · Score: 5, Funny

    We've been together for many years now, and I've known for most of that time that I wanted to spend my life with you. Enough rambling. Will you marry me?

    Shut-up. Just shut-up. You had me at hello. You had me at hello...

    --

    If you celebrate Xmas, befriend me (538
  22. GNU Wedding Vows. by Picass0 · · Score: 5, Funny


    So, will it be an "Open" marrage?

  23. congrats by JayAndSilentBob · · Score: 5, Funny

    But please teach him how to spell. Best of luck to you both.

    --


    Love,
    Jay and Silent Bob
  24. Hmm... by martinflack · · Score: 5, Funny

    Wow! That's all it takes? A post on /.?

    Michelle Pfeiffer, I love you, will you....

    Er, what? He _knew_ this Kathleen chick?

    Aw, crap.

  25. Have You Meta Proposed Today? by anser · · Score: 5, Funny

    This page was generated by a Squadron of Cyber Cupids for CmdrTaco and kathleen.

    If you are confused about the context of a particular comment, just link back to the love page through the marriage link...

    All the best!

  26. Mom Read This by blazerw11 · · Score: 5, Funny

    I though my mom would enjoy this story. She's a sappy romantic. So, I e-mailed her.

    Her reply:
    "When are you going to move out of the house? You're 30 years old for God's sake!"

    Crongrats CmdrTaco!

    --
    A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices. -- William James
  27. marraige by mosch · · Score: 5, Funny
    Congratulations Rob!

    My deepest sympathy, Kathleen.

  28. Re:Are you serious? by Gehenna_Gehenna · · Score: 5, Funny
    Congrats. Oddly enough, My sweetie and I are geting married on Ssaturday (9 years of dating, it was about time). And going to Hawaii for 2 1/2 weeks on Monday. Huzzah indeed.

    Congtratulations to you both!

    FOR THE BRIDE: Taco may ask you to do some...things... after you get married. Some things you may feel uncomfortable doing.


    Like .. cooking. Cleaning. DON'T BE FOOLED BY HIS SLICK PERSUASIVE STYLE. You always have "5" moderator points. Label his postings as "TROLL" and make him cook his own dinner

    Whatever. Maybe that wasn't as funny as i tought it was. I'm hoerrbly distracted right now. Anyhoo... CONGRATULATIONS!

    --

  29. Submitted by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    I submitted this a week ago, but they wouldn't post it!

    Good luck!

  30. Sigh... by phillymjs · · Score: 5, Informative

    I love you more then I can describe

    Cripes, Taco, you couldn't even use a grammar-checker on this, the most important posting of your life?

    Having said that, congratulations, and (I think I speak for more than a few Slashgeeks here) f--- you for reminding me that tonight I'll be going home to heat up a can of Chef Lonelyheart's Soup For One.

    ~Philly

  31. Thank God Katz didn't post this... by gosand · · Score: 5, Funny

    or it would have been 5 very large paragraphs wondering if people really *can* fall in love in these times of strife, war, politics, information superhighway, technology, and the whole point would have gotten lost in the drivel.

    --

    My beliefs do not require that you agree with them.

  32. MasterCard by base3 · · Score: 5, Funny
    1U Rackmount server: $10,000

    T-1 connection: $1,000/month

    Slashcode GPL: free

    Proposing marriage on your own website and having your beloved say "yes," priceless.

    --
    One CPU cycle wasted on digital restrictions management is ONE TOO MANY.
  33. Sorry Dude... by Greyfox · · Score: 5, Funny

    The handbook pretty plainly states that if you have a life, you must be stripped of all your geekly honors and be forced to drive a mini-van. I'm afraid we can't make any exceptions. Please check your dual athlon at the door on the way out.

    --

    I'm trying to teach myself to set people on fire with my mind... Is it hot in here?

  34. redhead ...... rare enough dont take them away by johnjones · · Score: 5, Funny

    dear sir

    I fear that you will be takeing a redhead from the singles population and placeing her into the married population. I find this kind of act intolerable as there are very few of them left as it is.

    regards

    john jones

  35. Re:best man ? by buzban · · Score: 5, Funny

    CowboyNealBestManOption? ;)

  36. Re:Are you serious? by matth · · Score: 5, Informative

    And here is a link to a picture of the to-be bride :)

    Kathleen Fent

    More information is available over at: Fent.NET

  37. Congratulations! by Trekologer · · Score: 5, Funny

    The big question awaits... does she get your root password?

  38. You've just slashdotted Taco's fiance!!! by Robber+Baron · · Score: 5, Funny

    ...you do know you're going to karma hell for that, don't you?

    --

    You're using her as bait, Master!

  39. It must be love by fleener · · Score: 5, Funny

    Imagine starting a web site and building it up to be incredibly popular - taking almost 5 years - just to propose to your girlfriend. Now that's love.

  40. Re:The real question..... by CmdrTaco · · Score: 5, Funny

    No... but you can paypal either of us... and I'd settle their 45 inch plasma TV ;)

    --
    Pants are still optional, but recommended for you.
  41. Probably real, according to her website by ddeboer · · Score: 5, Informative

    Probably real, according to http://www.fent.net/archive/troll.html :

    "...But if I were to post on Slashdot (which I will NEVER do...) my user number would be #570 and my user ID would be "Kathleen"."

    "... will NEVER post on Slashdot" - so much for that, eh?

    (I'm losing the first moderation points I've ever had by posting here, but it should be worth it...)

  42. Re:Hazah to Taco! by kathleen · · Score: 5, Offtopic

    Many other females might prefer the "traditional" medthod of proposing, but I liked this way best.

    Besides, I think it takes more guts to propose in front of all the flamers, don't you?

  43. Re:Good luck to you, but bah humbug on valentines by tcr · · Score: 5, Funny

    Congratulations!

    Are we all invited to the batchelor party?

    --


    Information wants to be beer.
  44. Re:Are you serious? by ackthpt · · Score: 5, Funny
    You always have "5" moderator points. Label his postings as "TROLL" and make him cook his own dinner

    Yeah, she's got to watch out, though, for when his buddies come over and Metamoderate.

    Rob: "Honey, would you get me a Lowbrau, please?"
    Kathleen: (-1 Troll) "Get it yourself, Rob, you lazy bum."
    Michael: (+1 Insightful) "Whoa! Rob, she's got you whipped!"
    Cliff: (Unfair:Troll) "Rob, you gonna let her do that to you?"
    Hemos: (+1 Interesting) "Hey, Rob, when did you start drinking?"
    CowboyNeal: (+1 Funny) "I suggest we set up a slashpoll on this one and let the readers decide who gets the beer:

    Kathleen

    Rob

    Anyone but CowboyNeal"

    --

    A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
  45. Re:Are you serious? by dhamsaic · · Score: 5, Funny

    And here is a much-larger picture for your viewing... er, "pleasure"...

    http://www.fent.net/graphics/cleavage.JPG

    --
    Every once in a while I like to masturbate a new word into my vocabulary, even if I don't know what it means.
  46. The Private E-mails... by fmaxwell · · Score: 5, Funny

    The e-mail exchange...

    >>>>>> Yes!

    >>>>> Yes, what?

    >>>> Yes, I'll marry you!

    >>> Huh? You are such a kidder.

    >>Proposing to me over Slashdot was so romantic!
    >>Should we plan on a June wedding?

    > I don't know how to tell you this, but
    > someone hacked Slashdot. I didn't post
    > that. I mean, I love you and all, but
    > I'm not ready for that kind of commitment.
    > Besides, things are really so great
    > between us, I'd hate to do anything to
    > mess it up.

    Kathy? Did you get my last message (see above)? Hey, I got you a heart shaped box of chocolate. Maybe we can go to a movie tonight. I think you've got a problem with your phone. Every time I've called, it rings once, sounds like it's being picked up, and then disconnects. Call me. Please. Luv U!
    ...

  47. Re:Are you serious? by Ian+Wolf · · Score: 5, Funny

    hmmm...Nicely done Taco.

    Congratulations!

    Now for the inevitable question. The question that follows every wedding announcement.

    When can we expect Sub-Commander Taco?

    --
    "The words of the prophets are written on the Slashdot walls."
  48. heh, downside to proposing on /. by StandardDeviant · · Score: 5, Funny

    So basically y'all just invited 150,000 trolls to your wedding. [mental image of a bunch of large green people fidgeting in white tuxedo/dress outfits under the watchful eyes of a squadron of truncheon[1]-armed moderators... and the single most popular wedding present would be fairly predictable]

    :-)

    Kidding aside, w00t! Congratulations! I did the bent knee thing, but for a twist I hid the ring in her clothes so I pulled it out of her pocket instead of mine...

    [1] Five use only, patent pending,

    --

    News for Geeks in Austin, TX
  49. Doesn't this belong.... by OctaneZ · · Score: 5, Funny

    Shouldn't this really be in Ask Slashdot?