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MPAA Wants Copy-Controlled PCs

phil reed writes: "According to our favorite media mogul, Jack Valenti (as stated in this letter in the Washington Post, all PCs need to have strong copy protection built in. 'Computer and video-device companies need to sit at the table with the movie industry. Together, in good-faith talks, they must agree on the ingredients for creating strong protection for copyrighted films and then swiftly implement that agreement to make it an Internet reality.' Way to go, guy."

13 of 728 comments (clear)

  1. make sure to get the patch into -rc1 by edrugtrader · · Score: 5, Funny

    come on kernel hackers, you heard the MPAA, i refuse to run linux anymore until the 2.4 tree includes strong copy protection

    --
    MARIJUANA, SHROOMS, X: ONLINE?! - E
    1. Re:make sure to get the patch into -rc1 by daniel_isaacs · · Score: 4, Funny

      I'd like to know who will be representing Linux at these meetings. I think I'm busy that week, so someone else will have to go.

      --
      - Dan I.
    2. Re:make sure to get the patch into -rc1 by curunir · · Score: 4, Funny

      I'm sure Mr. Valenti will be happy to represent the needs and interests of the Linux community.

      After all, he can really identify with the needs of your average linux user...namely, to be able to easily and cost-effectively create Linux rendering farms. He realizes that the average linux user has no need to actually watch DVD's on linux, that's something only pirates do. He realized that reverse engineering Microsoft's protocols was taking up too much effort of the linux community, so he had anti-circumvention provisions built into the DMCA. So now, the linux community doesn't waste nearly as much time doing that.

      So, when you think about, what better representative could Linux have?

      --
      "Don't blame me, I voted for Kodos!"
  2. Big Table? by dthable · · Score: 5, Funny

    He wants to sit down with everyone who develops Linux, FreeBSD and other open source PC products for some good faith talks? That's one big table.

  3. My old laptop will become a circumvention device by joshv · · Score: 5, Funny

    Hang on to those old PCs folks. Sooner than you think might be illegal to use them under the DCMA.

    They'll pry my TI99/4A from my cold, dead fingers.

  4. Dear Jack-- by banuaba · · Score: 4, Funny

    Eat me.

    Love,
    Brant

    --


    Brant

    Argle. Bargle.
  5. In other news... by Rayonic · · Score: 5, Funny

    "MPAA wants a pony for Christmas"
    Some things just ain't gonna happen.

  6. Also, we'll need... by snowlick · · Score: 5, Funny

    Guns that won't shoot innocent people,
    Microphones that won't record copyrighted soundwaves,
    Pencils that won't write copyrighted strings,
    Speakers that won't vibrate to reproduce copyrighted current patterns,
    Film that won't change when exposed to copyrighted rays of light,
    Oh yeah, and brains that won't remember copyrighted material of any sort.

    snow

    --
    Crystal Meth: Would you ingest somthing made from a poisonous gas and an explosive metal? You do it every day -- Salt!
  7. In a related topic... by BenSnyder · · Score: 3, Funny

    I have decided that I want Kraft Macaroni & Cheese to be even cheesier...

  8. Very flattering towards slashdot by karb · · Score: 5, Funny
    Although jack valenti is often disparaged by the slashdot community, he doesn't stoop to our level of insult. Look how he describes hordes of slashdot readers and other copyright activists :

    The movie industry is under siege from a small community of professors.

    I'm blushing, jack. No, we're not all professors.

    --

    Jack Valenti and the MPAA are to technology as the Boston strangler is to the woman home alone

  9. Corporate marketing 101 quiz by mttlg · · Score: 5, Funny

    1. Which has the biggest impact on profits?

    A - Exact bit-for-bit duplication of products from legally obtained originals, with the resulting copies sold on streetcorners and eBay.
    B - Production of products that rely on stupidity to make money and are of little or no value to the consumer.
    C - Evil naughty hackers.

    2. What should you do to ensure that "piracy" does as little damage as possible?

    A - Produce products with enough value that people would prefer to purchase a legitimate copy rather than deal with quality and legality issues of questionable copies.
    B - Encourage harsh prosecution of those who profit from the sale of "pirated" content and launch a PR campaign explaining your side of the case.
    C - Punish all consumers for not giving you enough money and argue that you should have complete control over everything you sell for all eternity, followed by evil laughter.

    3. When your product can no longer provide adequate profit in your market, you should:

    A - Change your product to better fit the market.
    B - Move to a different market.
    C - Grab market by the legs, spread them wide, and shove your product up the most convenient orifice.

  10. Must be hardware then... by powerlinekid · · Score: 5, Funny

    It would have to be in the hardware level or this won't work. Yeah I'm sure Microsoft would do this and maybe even Apple. But whos gonna tell the free community that they need to limit what they can do?

    RIAA: "Hi Mr. Torvalds, we need you to enforce the DMCA in your kernel"
    RIAA: "Hi Redhat, we need you to enforce the DMCA more and Mr. Torvalds told us to contact you."

    RedHat: "Umm... we don't actually do the coding for those media projects, you'll have to contact Gnome, KDE, and all the other little developers"

    RIAA: "Oh... thank you, you wouldn't happen to the phone number for 1337hac0rz34 would you?"

    RedHat: "Haha... click".

    Actually this would be funny, I'd like to see them do something like this, because in linux the dmca,etc will never be software. So unless they're hacking firmware which would be a whore, this won't work.

    --

    can't sleep slashdot will eat me
  11. Re:Mr. Valenti gets framed... by w3woody · · Score: 3, Funny

    How 8.4% of US bandwidth be movies when 40% of it is illegal MPEGs and 75% of it is illegal underage porn?