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Stealth Asteroid Misses Earth
Paradoxish writes: "Gah. According to cnn.com an asteroid hiding in an astronomical blindspot nearly blindsided Earth. The scary part is that scientists didn't notice it until four days AFTER it passed by. Apparently, it would've been similiar to the Tunguska explosion. Scary." As long as they keep missing Earth, we're OK.
Now I'll really get to live to see the HURD released...
[ducks]
The asteroid was installed with a propulsion system and aimed at New Jersey. Unfortunately, due to a conversion factor from metric units, the asteroid missed Earth completely.
Nosce te Ipsum
If we could just get the calculations more refined, then the asteroids will never hit us.
If you do the precise calculation, you find that it couldn't have hit, because it missed!
;-)
Strange that
-WolfWithoutAClause
"Gravity is only a theory, not a fact!"Just remember, every Asteroid is a potential "Britney killer", and should be viewed as such.
I can't live without my Britney Spears.
That is where I keep all my stuff....
If it pierced the atmosphere, the approximately 70-meter-long rock could have disintegrated and unleashed the energy equivalent
of a 4-megaton nuclear bomb, researchers said.
"If it were over a populated area, like Atlanta, it would have basically flattened it," said Gareth Williams, associate director of the International Astronomical Union Minor Planet Center in Boston, Massachusetts.
Thanks for telling me how dead I'd be if it hit here. Couldn't you have talked about it hitting somewhere where I don't live? Like Kabul, or something? Maybe Baghdad?
You, my friend, are management material! You will be promoted shortly. Well done.
Moon Macrosystems. Sun's biggest competitor.
What would happen if an asteroid of a given size hit the moon?
If it had the same mass as the moon and collided on a tangent to the moon's orbit, it would replace the moon in our sky. Our "old" moon would go flying off into space.
That would be cool. Kind of like one of those executive toys. Of course, I'm assuming an unlikely inelastic reaction...
Get the editors off the Crack and into detox... You're frickn scar'n me.
Ice Shelf Collapses
Resident Evil
Child Porn
Killer Asteroids
heuristic algorithm seeks stochastic relationship
Pulitzer prize winner Dave Barry[Miami Herald] commented on this a few weeks ago:
Asteroid Nearly Destroys Earth
Would this cure lycanthropy?
Which technology is that, please?
Britney's pontoons.
I forget...are we at war with Eurasia or East Asia?
2002 EM7 might make a good test for NEA destruction systems.
I had no idea the National Endowment for the Arts had such systems.
It's good to know that when scientists fail to protect our planet, we can always rely on the artists!
"Don't blame me, I voted for Kodos!"
His point, which you seem to have missed, is that there is clearly someone out there pelting us with rocks and garbage.
Soil your undies, perhaps?
omg, it's commin right for us!
btw, i wanted to yell
Post aborted
Reason: Don't use so many caps. It's like YELLING.
-- LINUS TORVALDS, (cnn): Because their operating systems (Windows) really suck.
I'm appalled! Imagine someone posting something that isn't completely original on slashdot!!
I stole this Sig
if an asteroid is going to hit what are we going to do exactly?
Evacuate Atlanta?
Tarsnap: Online backups for the truly paranoid
Damn, can you imagine what a cow looks like after it's been hit by a meteorite? SPLAT!
I'd probably pay to see that.
Not that I have anything against cows, mind you.
--
Don't like it? Respond with words, not karma.
> What's the point if an asteroid is going to hit what are we going to do exactly?
Have you ever stopped consider how many times even a
(I have to conclude that astronomer-geeks don't have any trouble getting laid, or else they would be letting out false alarms now and then.)
Sheesh, evil *and* a jerk. -- Jade
Now, I'm probably not the first cocksucker to say this, but FOR FUCKS SAKE, HOW DO YOU LOSE AN ASTEROID? Let's not banter around terms like 'blind spot' when we're talking about a huge fucking rock speeding towards Earth. A fucking Pinto, the piece of ghetto shit it is, has a blind spot. What kind of stupid bitch reporter came up with that faggoty line. I lose a motorcyclist in my blind spot. A hugeass rock moving about Mach 999999 is not exactly some eurotrash mullet sporting mofo riding a leaf blower down the street.
I wish science would get off it's high horse and quit fucking us up the ass with its pedantic and rather insulting dumbed down descriptions. Stupid cunts.
"My advisors have just informed me that the sun has been hurling dangerous, radiation death rays at the United States and its friends for millenia. And they have a 'solar flare' weapon they use to disrupt our electronics."
"Mark my words. We will smoke them out of their holes and wipe them off the face of the planet," Bush stated, before a reporter pointed out that the sun is not on Earth. "It don't make no difference -- don't interrupt me with the politics of details, son. We're still going to hunt them down and put a stop to them."
The president refused to answer questions about whether he plans to detain the sun in Cuba.
"What happens if a big asteroid hits the Earth? Judging from realistic simulations involving a sledge hammer and a common laboratory frog, we can assume it will be pretty bad." -- Dave Barry
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If you moderate this, then your children will be next.
Why Atlanta, huh? You Bostonians have a problem with us or somethun?!?! Shee-it, I gots neighbors with pickup trucks bigger than that damned rock anyday. Bring it on, we'll haul it off for ya!
2004-08-01 15:00:12 Comet misses earth (science,news) (rejected)
2005-01-12 01:51:02 Another stealth asteroid misses earth (science,news) (rejected)
2007-12-23 23:33:58 Asteroid hits earth, wipes out civilization (science,news) (rejected)
I still have no idea why the last story was rejected.
Well, to be fair to the scientists, all their mothers told them not to stare at the sun, so can we really blame them for not seeing it?
> Same as before, or maybe less. Look around you. Would you want the sight of a naked
Surely you didn't think I was talking about getting it on with other
Sheesh, evil *and* a jerk. -- Jade
Everyone knows that the Philidelphia expieriment was based on tesla's theories of time portals and Giant magnetec lenses... That was nothing more than a test that the lense imploded causing a massive radiation explosion... We studied that in history along with the military tests in 2012 with magnetic propulsion of submarines that created the first 700mph underwater vehicle that makes interdimensional travel possible today.
Oh wait, my professor told me to not say things like that when using this internet time portal... Shit... oh well being on slashdot noone will believe it anyways....
CiaO!
Do not look at laser with remaining good eye.
I dunno... I once saw an 8 come down off the board and start beating the crap out of a dart player who missed his shot entirely. The dude was slightly drunk, too, so the 8 was really trashing him before the rest of us got them apart. Of course, the 17 is pretty irritable too -- I wouldn't be surprised if one of them ever gave somebody a smack in the head.
I have a strong belief in the Second Amendment.
Well, if we can't see it because of the sun's light, why don't we just look for it at NIGHT? Duuuuuh...
This is a special excite
This
...Air Force Cancels Project"
In a news confrence today top US Air Force brass announced the cancellation of Project Stealth Space Rock o' Death, when the initial test of the ten year, $100 billion project failed.
"We are very dissapointed with the recent failure", an unnamed scientist told reporters today at a press confrence held at an Arlington, Virginia-area Denny's, "the damn thing just missed...it was kind of a one-shot deal, you know? We're all pretty bummed around the office."
The Stealth Asteroid was to capitalize on the success of the Stealth Bomber. "After the Gulf War, we were trying to figure out what other stealth things we could build. We were kicking stuff around the table, and somebody, I think Steve said stealth asteroid. I don't know if he was kidding or what, but we went ahead with it." The Stealth Asteroid was to be a weapon similar in theory to the Stealth Bomber, but different in a number of key areas. "First of all...it's not a plane. That's a big difference right there. Second, it would show up on the enemy radar at some point. Kind of a moot point, I guess...what would they do? Shoot at it? Maybe open an umbrella like in the cartoons. They'd be pretty boned......suckers."
While nothing is being admitted, it was widely believed that the first test of this new weapons platform would also be its first use in combat, especially against targets in reinforced bunkers, buildings, yurts, or anywhere within a 15-mile radius of the impact zone.
In other news, the Pentagon has announced the beginning of "Project Stealth Solar Super-flare".
"These people look deep within my soul and assign me a number based on the order in which I joined" --Homer re: