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EMI Customer Relations Tells It Like It Is

hype7 writes "The Register is running a story about the most outrageous email sent from a customer services rep at BMI in Germany to a customer who had difficulty playing a copy-protected CD in his CD player. One of the most stunning lines from the translation: "If you plan to continue protesting about future audio media releases with copy protection, forget it; copy protection is a reality, and within a matter of months more or less all audio media worldwide are copy protected. And this is a good thing for the music industry. In order to make this happen we will do anything within our power - whether you like it or not.""

14 of 1,046 comments (clear)

  1. I tried to post first by nlinecomputers · · Score: 4, Funny

    but it was copy protected.

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  2. In other words... by fobbman · · Score: 5, Funny

    "All your Ace of Base are belong to us."

    Don't they realize that they more they antagonize the music-sharing community the harder they will work to circumvent the copy protection? Even on the artists that really suck. It's all about principal now.

    1. Re:In other words... by yog · · Score: 4, Funny

      I'd rather download tracks at no cost that, after X number of times, gradually become low quality; e.g. the vocalist starts to sing out of tune, the drummer is off by a beat, etc. If it's classical music, the solo violinist could start to sound screechy and out of tune. And so forth. The same concept could be applied to video, by the way; that pretty star suddenly develops warts and a raspy voice. Fred Astaire starts tripping and falling on stage as the audience hoots and throws garbage.

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  3. Re:Oh well. by cmeans · · Score: 5, Funny
    Yes, it seems like that industry wants to "Copy Protect" itself out of business..."see ya!"

  4. Reply to EMI by Windcatcher · · Score: 5, Funny

    To paraphrase the NRA:

    You can have my money when you pry it from my cold, dead fingers.

  5. I am extremely glad to hear this. by LordOfYourPants · · Score: 5, Funny

    With bullet-proof copy protection now available, I should now be able to buy a CD-R in Canada without paying any tariff that goes to the record companies, right?

    I mean.. that was the whole purpose of the tariff in the first place. To give back some money to the record labels that were losing money from dubbing of CDs that people would buy otherwise.

    What are the odds of the tariff being eliminated? I'd say about the same odds of the GST being eliminated.

  6. Good think Mozart is not alive today. by jellomizer · · Score: 5, Funny

    Mozart, besides of being one of the worlds greatest composers, had the ability to listen to a piece of music and repoduct it word for word note to note, from only one listening. Perfect Pitch, and Photographic memory. If he was alive today, He would be thrown in jail for breaking the DMCA, Sience he instantly copies all that he hears into his brain.

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  7. Better customer service.... by MacAndrew · · Score: 5, Funny

    I dunno -- I kind of like this new "kindler, gentler" customer relations that calls it like it. This is way better than the more typical "Duh, I'm not sure what you mean?" or "Please hold while we transfer your call. Your call will be served in the order received. We value your business and thank you for calling. (click) (dial tone)" or "Thank you for your letter on BMI products! Enclose please find coupons good towards your next purchase!"

  8. Re:The scary part... by realgone · · Score: 5, Funny
    No, no, no... the scary part is that the CD our German friend was writing EMI about in the first place was Toto's "Through the Looking Glass".

    If overly stringent copy protection means there's one less person in the world listening to Toto cover "House of the Rising Sun", can it really be all bad?

  9. Re:oh well by squarefish · · Score: 4, Funny

    But maybe the sight of some 40-something, balding fat guys does something for you, I don't care.

    Yes, balding fat guys do do something for me....

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  10. So many ears! by Anonymous+Custard · · Score: 5, Funny

    From EMI letter: There are 250 Million blank CDRs and tapes bought and used this year for copying music in comparison to 213 Million prerecorded audio media. This means the owners are only being paid for 46 per cent of the musical content. For a comparison: In 1998 almost 90% of all audio media was paid for. Even without a degree in economics everyone should realise that such trends will result in the music industry ceasing to exist.

    [breaks out calc.exe.... tap-tap-tap...] OMG! By similar calculation, I calculate that, allowing for deaf people, there are 12 Billion ears on this planet used for listening to EMI cd's, in comparison with the only 50 million or so microphones in the world. That means 99.995833% of all the world's hearing power is used for EMI music, but EMI's 1996 sales were still only about £2.7 billion. That puts the entire music industry's annual sales for 2002 at about £3 billion. Therefor, each individual ear only pays about £0.25 annually for the more than 213 Million CD's EMI gives to them. That's £0.00000000117370 per CD. Now subtract the greedy musician's 15% royalties, and poor EMI has only pulls in £0.00000000099764.5; not even enough to afford a spot of tea to quench their thirst after a hard day's work.

    Oh, and I DO have a degree in Economics, but I didn't use one bit of it to write the preceding rant.

  11. Re:Oh well. by RagManX · · Score: 5, Funny
    I'm just waiting for ONE major artist (Madonna, Phil Collins, Elton John, etc.) to publically refuse to resign with the RIAA

    Didn't Courtney Love do this?

    Oh, wait, you said major artist. Sorry - my bad. :)

    RagManX
  12. Re:Oh well. by MrEd · · Score: 4, Funny
    Music quality has dropped dramatically.


    Another explanation: We're all getting older! Bah humbug! Nothing but noise!


    Mfg'ed bands suck as much as always, and there are certainly a lot more of them around these days. However, you will find lots of pretty good (though some would argue not terribly innovative) music being released by RIAA artists these days. If there has been a drop in quality I wouldn't characterize it as 'dramatic'.

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  13. Re:Oh well. by jafuser · · Score: 4, Funny
    The problem is, I think they're shooting for the goal of getting the government to tax all non-deaf people for the privledge of being able to hear.

    At some point, they won't even need to produce any new content... then they can fire all the employees/artists and just have the government forward the collected tax money directly to their shareholders's bank accounts...

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