Ellen Feiss Interview

An anonymous reader writes "The Wait is over! Ellen Feiss's interview is up! And she really was on drugs, (well, allergy meds.)" She's, like, going to be traumatized about this forever, like.

Comments

Slashdotted already!

[Wedge1024]

mirrors anyone?

Allergy Medication?

[Frosty Inc.]

Yeah right! Like, I'm so sure that allergy meds make you totally seem like you just smoked a fat joint. Own up to it already. You were stoned. Besides, confirming you were baked could only IMPROVE your image among your fans :-D .

Don't get the wrong idea

[ekrout]

It's fun to joke about marijuana use, but the joke may be on you if you ever try to get a nice job some day.

I have an on-site interview with a top defense contractor here in the U.S. in two weeks, and it concludes with a comprehensive drug test. If I was a user of marijuana (and I have never tried the stuff), I would most definitely fail the test, even if trying some method of flushing the drugs out of my system.

It may seem cruel to any drug users here, but the bottom line is that no one trusts a druggie. Glazed-over, bloodshot eyes are not the kind of things that the United States government reps want to start into while signing a $5 billion contract for a new anti-missile defense system.

I'm a lucky guy in that I have been able to withstand peer pressure and remain drug-free.

Re:I'm a little disappointed...

[sg3000]

> But she says in the article, it was a true story...

Whoop! whoops! whoops!

I was moderating this article, and I originally choose your comment as "insightful", but somehow this changed to "overrated" when I used my scroll wheel to move down the article. I didn't notice this until I got the confirmation. Sorry, if this hurt your karma! Don't worry, I'll get mine when someone metamoderates me as "unfair".

Hopefully, when I post this message, slashdot will remove the points I awarded to this article, and your comment will be back to normal.

Re:I'm a little disappointed...

[Huge Pi Removal]

It's annoying that, I've nearly made the same mistake several times. Don't worry, I'm maxed out on karma, and your modding has been undone anyway :)

Best wishes,

Oliver.

re: your sig

[Dave_bsr]

Why I'm a Linux user for life

:)

Re:Is that it?

[eht]

you can have new york city, the rest of new york doesn't want it, it's a huge drain on taxes, we wish jersey would take it as most of the people who work in nyc that don't live there, instead live in jersey

and you can't pay me to visit california

Re:Hot Grits

[BlackBolt]

Can someone explain the "hot grits" thing?

This is a common request, so I'll reveal the terrifying answer once and for all:

THE ORIGIN OF HOT GRITS

BlackBolt: "Can someone explain the "hot grits" thing?" Let me tell you why you're asking that. You're asking because you know something. What you know you can't explain. But you feel it. You've felt it your entire life. That there's something wrong with the world. You don't know what it is but it's there, like a splinter in your mind driving you mad. It is this feeling that has brought you to me. Do you know what I'm talking about?

AC: Hot Grits?

BlackBolt: Do you want to know what they are? Hot Grits are everywhere. They are all around us, even now in this very room. You can see them when you look out your window or when you turn on your television. You can feel them when you go to work, when you go to church, when you pay your taxes. They are they when a Natalie Portman Quicktime link is posted on the Front Page of Slashdot and the entire Internet quakes in fear. They are the world that has been pulled over your eyes to blind you from the truth.

AC: What truth?

BlackBolt: That you are a slave, AC. Like everyone else (except RMS, of course) you were born into bondage, born into a prison that you cannot smell or taste or touch. A prison for your mind.... Slashdot.

Unfortunately, no one can be told what Hot Grits are. You have to see them for yourself. This is your last chance. After this there is no turning back. You eat the blue grits, the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You eat the red grits, you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes... Remember, all I'm offering is the truth, nothing more... Follow me...

[Later]

BlackBolt: Fate, it seems, is not without a sense of irony. A lapful of delicious Hot Grits generate more bio-electricity than a 120-volt battery and over 25,000 BTUs of maple flavor. Combined with a form of fusion, Cowboy Neal has found all the energy Slashdot would ever need to Slashdot entire networks. There are fields, endless fields, where hot grits are no longer born. They are grown. For the longest time I wouldn't believe it, and then I saw the fields with my own eyes. I watched Taco liquefy the dead grits so they could be fed intravenously to the living. And standing there, facing the pure horrifying precision, I came to realize the obviousness of the truth.

What are Hot Grits? Control.

Slashdot is a computer generated dream world, powered by Hot Grits, built to keep us under control in order to change a human being into the lowest of lifeforms, a trolling Anonymous Coward.

AC: No. I don't believe it. It's not possible.

BlackBolt: I didn't say it would be easy, AC. I just said it would be the truth.

AC: No. Stop. Let me out. Let me out. I want out.

BlackBolt: Then you must go see the sexy Oracle, Natalie Portman, and dump hot grits in her lap. And if she gives you a cookie, for god's sake, DON'T EAT IT!

BlackBolt