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Amazon Seeks '2-Click' Shopping Cart Patent
theodp writes "Looks like Amazon's really getting back in the patent game. Today, the USPTO published Amazon's patent application for conducting electronic commerce using multiple shopping carts. Using the invention, a shopper purchasing items for five relatives can set up one shopping cart for each relative, a shopper purchasing books for Johnny can name one of his shopping carts "Johnny's books", and a shopper can add items to multiple shopping carts with only two mouse clicks." This might also be a good time to point out to those who didn't see it the first time AOL's patent claims regarding "Instant Message" technology; you may be able to think of some prior art.
Click, ponder, drag, click again?
Click, click... pirouette, double-click, sashay?
Triple-click, behind the back, no-look double-pump click?
AOL Patents "0-click" spam reception technique.
We at AOL want you to not have to do *anything* to receive spam.
"Times have not become more violent. They have just become more televised."
-Marilyn Manson
When I go shopping for my dear old grandma I use 2 carts, one for me and one for granny.
However, my grandma isn't called Johnny, so this probably doesn't count.
That would make about as much sense as this.
will someone hurry up and patent spamming? And then sue the bastards for royalty? that should put an end to it... If these stupid people at amazon get away with their patent, we have a strong case for the spamming patent, sure it's been done before, sure it's done by most everyone, sure they didn't enforce their IP... I still want the patent dang it!
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Programming is like sex... Make one mistake and support it the rest of your life.
Okay, I have had enough, I am going to patent the "one finger response" to the ignorance lawyers can invent, only to be eclipsed by the ignorance government can dispense.
Eve Fairbanks says I drive a hybrid!LOL
You know, just a couple at first, then as realization dawns, a flurry of hammers upon the mouse!
No! You infernal machine!*click* *Click*
You *CLICK* WILL *CLICK CLICK* PAAAAAAAYYYY!
*CLICK CLICK* CLICK *CLICK CLICK CLICK* AHHHHHHHH!
I'd like to thank Microsoft for giving me the idea...grr
No one better come after by 47 click shopping cart. It's much easier than my 974 click cart.
And I shall file a patent on:
... click patents!
"A method, given an N-click shopping method, to convert it into an N+1 click shopping method."
Thus, I shall be able to stymie Amazon's 3, 4, 5
MWHAHAHAHAH!
www.eFax.com are spammers
I'm 3-click shopping where the first click selects the shopping cart, the second click selects the credit card you want to pay with (for all the poor-ass people like me who need to spread out their bills over multiple cards) and the third click will order the item!
Woohoo! No more multiple credit cards for me, time to sue people and make money!
Anyways, I saw several people with more than one shopping cart. They were hauling two shopping carts around the store, barely fitting through the aisles. The two shopping carts were necessary because they were purchasing gifts for several people in their households. The gifts were large. Upon closer inspection, it appeared that one shopping cart was for girls (everything was pink, such as Barbie dolls), and the other one was for an adult (a BBQ grill).
There ya go, Walmart customer #98981663711 is what inspired this lunacy. Or maybe that customer got the idea from those genious Amazon'ians ?
Sex - Find It
Amazon: At this very moment, we have teams of lawyers working on patenting our one click buying technology.
*silence*
Would you believe two click buying?
*silence*
Would you believe five clicks and and clack?
Where does the school board find them and why do they keep sending them to ME?
Dear world,
Perhaps I should apply for the way I sit on the couch. You know leaning to one side with one leg up on the ottoman. I could then sue anyone who sits in anyway similar.
Patents shouldn't be granted for such general and vague concepts, period. Greed. Greed. Greed. Can we all say greed?
-Slashdot Junky
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Landfill Mining Co.
Managing the (Un)natural Resources of Tomorrow
Couldn't the USPTO application process be simplified by consulting the emacs docs for every single patent application? If emacs can't do whatever the patent is for, it's practically a certainty that the idea is new.
There aint no pancake so thin it doesn't have two sides.
You know leaning to one side with one leg up on the ottoman.
As a prelude to the 'one cheek sneak'.
Oh gosh these guys are clever. First one-click shopping, now two-click shopping. What next?
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For great justice!
If they patent 2 click shopping they will be twice in conflict with their 1 click shopping patent. Question is, are they big enough (and stupid enough) to sue themselves for pantent infringement? LOL.
No trees were killed in the making of this post; however, many trillions of electrons were horribly inconvenienced.