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Mood-Sensing Computer

Posted by michael on from the his-master's-voice dept.

handy_vandal writes "'A team at Vanderbilt University is ... developing a robotic assistant whose goal is .. [to] respond to the moods of its human master.' For use on the battlefield -- e.g. when a soldier is overcome with anxiety."

12 of 202 comments (clear)

  1. Hmm. by Renraku · · Score: 5, Funny

    iMac's that change color based on your mood? That's clever marketing.

    --
    Job? I don't have time to get a job! Who will sit around and bitch about being broke and unemployed then?
  2. advanced? by ItalianScallion · · Score: 5, Funny

    hi, i'm Hal, and i'm really sorry your windows box got hacked. want a beer?

  3. I can see it now by serps · · Score: 5, Funny

    "It looks like you're trying to take cover under enemy fire. Do you need some help taking cover?"

    --
    "Einstein argued that [...] God is not capricious or arbitrary. No such faith comforts the software engineer." ~ Brooks
  4. What if ... by SuperDuG · · Score: 5, Funny
    ... the computer sense a little ... you know ... "in the mood" ... "more ready than usual" ... "ready for a different kind of action" ... "ready to play ball" ... "ready to take one for the team" ... "in the mood for some lovin"

    If it can cater to that need ... then it is DEFINANTELLY slashdot worthy and should be expanded to a market far wider than the military.

    --
    Ignore the "p2p is theft" trolls, they're just uninformed
    1. Re:What if ... by vidnet · · Score: 5, Funny

      I dunno, it could be kind of a turnoff to hear Clippy say "It looks like you're trying to spank your monkey. Would you like help with spanking your monkey?"

  5. It'd be sad... by Sonny+Yatsen · · Score: 5, Funny

    It'd be sad when one day your computer will be telling you, "I'm not in the mood, I have a headache."

    --
    My postings are informational and does not constitute legal advice. Act on it at your risk.
  6. it better have a breathalizer built in by SHEENmaster · · Score: 5, Funny

    So when you're drunk it can stop you from driving.

    And if you're really drunk it can keep you from calling exgirlfriends.

    --
    You can't judge a book by the way it wears its hair.
  7. I've heard early versions are quite buggy. by Blue+Stone · · Score: 5, Funny

    Computer: "Sir, I have noticed you are feeling a little horny today, and have downloaded some pr0n for you..."

    User: "Gah!...How many times do I have to tell you???! I only looked at the dwarf stuff once out of curiosity."

    Computer:"Sir I notice you are becoming slightly irritated.... perhaps a wank will calm you down? Observe the dwarf pr0n.... Observe the dwa.. #clik#

    --
    Corporation, n. An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility. - Ambrose Bierce
  8. I'm imagining the enemy hacking into the system... by dagg · · Score: 4, Funny
    Enemy hacks in and watches the moods of our combatants:
    Enemy Underling: Sir, the allied forces are very nervous, should we attack?
    Enemy Commander: Not yet.
    Enemy Underling: Sir, the allied forces are extremely pissed off, should we attack?
    Enemy Commander: Not yet.
    Enemy Underling: Sir, the allied forces are extremely happy and some appear inebriated, should we attack?
    Enemy Commander: ATTTTTAAAACK!!!!
    --
    Sex - Find It
  9. Yeah but is it real intelligence? by euxneks · · Score: 5, Funny

    soldier: AAAAGGH! My ARM HAS BEEN BLOWN OFF!!!
    robot: Your ARM HAS BEEN BLOWN OFF?
    soldier: YES!!!
    robot: What kind of arm is it??
    soldier: OH MY GOD THE PAIN IS UNBEARABLE!
    robot: Yippee! Your GOD THE PAIN IS UNBEARABLE?
    soldier: WHAT??!!! MY ARM!! MY ARM!!!
    robot: Where did you get your ARM?
    soldier: IT'S BEEN BLOWN OFF YOU STUPID PIECE OF SH*T!
    robot: Is it still BLOWN OFF me STUPID PIECE OF SH*T anymore?
    soldier faints from loss of blood
    soldier: uhhnnn...
    robot: Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans?

    --
    in girum imus nocte et consumimur igni
  10. Combat Clippy by racerx509 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Clippy: It looks like you are bleeding to death. Would you like some help?

    --
    13 year old white supremacists are shitty web designers.
  11. Great! by JohnnyBigodes · · Score: 4, Funny

    It'll be really good when I start to get pissed off at the computer and it then decides to work fine withouth any further questions because it saw me waving a 15Kg iron mallet