Suggestions for Functional Jewelry?

szyzyg asks: "I'm getting married and my girlfriend and I have been looking around at rings and not really getting anywhere. I have all sorts of high concepts about what this should represent and I keep coming back to the thought 'nothing which is useless can be truly beautiful'. So I've been fighting with the idea of how to make a ring which has some use beyond simple symbolism... concepts like using magnetic minerals to turn it into a compass, or engraving some sort of measuring mechanism into it. So here's the challenge I'm putting to the Slashdot bright idea machine: How do I make a simple piece of jewelry useful? Someone out there must have better ideas."

Comments

Put a Q twist on it.

[HaloZero]

Add a little James-Bond-Esque laser to it. Just make sure she takes it off with the rest of her stuff before you tie her up. ;-)

No Date!

[Anonymous Coward]

What ever you get, do *not* engrave a date inside - too often it turns out to be a "best before" date.

Wedding Rings are usefull

[Merlin42]

For those who are not socially inept the wedding ring serves as a very simple communication device. It informs people as to who is 'off the market'. This same type of communication has been acheived by other cultures in different forms, eg a red dot on the forehead or a basil plant in the window.

Re:Wedding Rings are usefull

[zulux]

It informs people as to who is 'off the market'.

This is certainly true - but in another way a ring can say:

"Hey - We can have a bit of fun, and I don't want commitment: I already have somone to do housework/heavy lifting and already have 2.5 children"

Re:Wedding Rings are usefull

[stefanlasiewski]

Or the ever famous:

"Hey, I was a good catch, but you missed it. Nyaa nyaa."

Secret compartment?

[skaffen42]

How about a secret compartment in which you can keep a cyanide pill?

This is cool in a James Bond kind of way AND you will have a quick way out of the marriage if the mother in law gets too much.

:)

Re:Secret compartment?

[pcmills]

Do you eat it or give it to your mother in law?

You should get her a heat-sensitive gold band

[Mordant]

that when put into the hearth, shows funny-looking script characters on the inside, resizes itself to fit the wearer's finger, and answers to the name of "Precious."

"I'm getting married"

[Dukebytes]

Can you say diamond? Seriously - even if shes a g33ky g1rl - I would take a look at a diamond. ALL of her family and friends will be checking out her wedding ring - ALL of them...

You dont want your future mother-in-law saying "Well that Billy is a nice boy - but geesh did you see that ring he bought her? I thought those computer people made good money?" know what I mean? :)

If you want to make her one - go for it - but get a expensive one to put on her finger in front of the preach...

Duke

Re:"I'm getting married"

[buro9]

which is fine until you travel to some parts of the world where such an advertisement will ensure you'll be mugged.

remember that you'll be wearing this for the rest of your lives if all goes well... as such whilst thoughts on a use are cool, there is a lot to be said for a simple gold band.

Re:"I'm getting married"

[zulux]

Real women don't want a diamind:

A real woman will know that a diamond is just an expensive way to dazzle the easily dazzled.

She will also know it's just carbon.

She will aslo know that it's a common stone, kept uncommon by a diamond cartel.

She will aslo know that many diamons are mined by children in conditions akin to slavery.

She would also rather have flying lessons, a trip on the Concorde to Paris, or a Harley.

I suguest, that any woman that has a social structure that makes getting a diamond more important than getting a hang-glider and lessons, is a woman to be dumped to the curb.

Re:"I'm getting married"

[hafree]

Yeah I have to agree here, this is one of the gayest "ask slashdot" questions I've heard in a long time. Get her a rock, not a secret decoder ring.

Re:"I'm getting married"

[Wolfier]

I think you're talking about "Smart women" instead of "Real women".

Not all real women are smart, but we're safe to assume the converse that all smart women are real.

Re:"I'm getting married"

[RevAaron]

gayest. hrmm, yeah.

why is it that homophobetards always pick the darndest time to call something gay? Oh, this dude is going to marry a women- how gay!

Ugly but functional

[bjpirt]

it's pretty ugly visually, but if you're more turned on by functionality then this peasant sundial ring might be the ring for you.

It's cheap too :-)

Wedding ring

[Anonymous Coward]

I resisted enriching DeBeers with my wife's wedding ring, and overall my suggestion would be "don't". People are very irrational when it comes to closely held beliefs**.

Eventually after lots of pain she came to appreciate her original ring more than the regular engagement ring, but it took many months and quite a few girlfriends to say "wow that is a nice stone".

Now about the use of the ring, it sends a message to her: I love you so much that I'm happy to waste a few grand on you.

Lastly, sometimes the most beautiful objects are those with no use at all. The caves of Lascaux painted 15,000 years ago are one of the most beautiful sights you could ever see.

** Try to argue that M$ is other than absolute evil or that Linux could be improved here, and you'll see what I mean :-)

Re:Wedding ring

[Tackhead]

> Lastly, sometimes the most beautiful objects are those with no use at all.

True, however, all male geeks need to be aware that this is one of those sentences for which no interpretation exists that allows for the continued attachment of their testicles to their body.

Twist Tie

[_iris]

Just go with the twist tie. They have plenty of uses; closing food containers, picking your teeth, manually opening CD-ROM drives, etc.

Computer chip in your ring

[iamsure]

http://www.ibutton.com/

It allows you to store cryptographic keys, and more.

Design a ring that uses that as the facet, and you're all set. Very functional, very useful.

A word to the wise....

[Asprin]

I really do wish you luck, but did you run this past her?

Are you **ABSOLUTELY** **CERTAIN** she's OK with the idea of jewelry that "does stuff"?

Don't get me wrong - I'd love the idea of having a ring that could double as a compass or has a laser or maybe has a web server in it. But I'm not a chick for a reason. My wife would have killed me if I got her a ring that did anything except sit there and depreciate - that's why I let her pick it out. If nothing else, tell her that its super-power is that it also cuts glass.

Seriously, man -- stop the bleeding before it starts. THIS COULD BE A TEST! Chicks *love* doing kind of thing to us.

On engraving...

[waytoomuchcoffee]

My wedding ring is pretty geeky -- it's titanium with engraving -- dots and vertical lines representing 0's and 1's, which spell out my wife's initials in binary (in 5-bit letters). I got it here; the guy that runs the place is very open into making custom-made designs.

I had thought about actually using it for something, like an encryption key -- for example if I started at a certain place on the ring, went a certain direction and counted up 7 or 8 bit ascii words, I could get a passphrase after a while, a pretty strong one. At this point all I would need to memorize for a theoretically very long passphrase would be the starting location, direction, and number of letters.

Even if the men in black kidnapped me and found my ring, they would still have a hard time figuring it out ;-) Now only if I could find a titanium hat -- the tin ones are so 20th century.

Re:On engraving...

[waytoomuchcoffee]

Actually I meant to say inlay rather than engraving... silver inlay on a titanium ring is really beautiful. I like reactive inlays (like silver) myself, rather than gold, as it changes color slightly week by week.

Re:On engraving...

[cybermace5]

On titanium rings:

They're not practical for any purpose other than being a wedding ring, and do you honestly need any more purpose? If I ever have need of one, I'm definitely going with the sine wave style.

Dan Statman (of the site you linked) is a member of the TurboCNC community, CNC software that runs on an old 486 with step rates up to 20,000Hz. TurboCNC is being actively developed by Dave Kowalczyk. It's 100% free to use, $20 for the Pascal source. This is for something that can cost hundreds or thousands of dollars elsewhere, and would never run on anything below 400MHz.

Dan Statman built all of his own tools, using TurboCNC to drive his titanium-ring engraver. He quit his job and does this full-time now. He's a regular poster (as am I) in the TurboCNC user group.

It's amazing what you can do with $300 of scrap metal and surplus parts.

Just make sure it does it's primary jobs

[swillden]

Whatever else you might try to make it do, first ensure that your choice accomplishes the basics. It must:

1. Please her. Hopefully, the idea of the ring pleases her, but she should like the ring itself as well. If she thinks it's ugly, or gaudy, or plain, or... anything other than beautiful, you've failed. Also important (sometimes more important, depending on the woman) is what her family, friends, etc., will think of it. I hate to say it, but "traditional" may be be best bet. It's certainly the safest.
2. Look like a wedding ring. The main day-to-day function of a wedding ring is to let everyone around her know that she's married and, hence, unavailable. It's of no use if no one recognizes it as what it is.
3. Be reasonably comfortable. The idea is that she's going to wear this nearly 24x7 for the rest of her life, right? Don't saddle her with some monstrosity that's always getting in the way.

Oh, and one more suggestion, something I learned the hard way: make sure that it doesn't have any sharp points sticking up. My wife's first ring (the diamond fell out at the beach one day, so she got a new one) had these fairly sharp points on the tips of the prongs around the solitaire. Every time she'd roll over to cuddle up in bed, I'd end up bleeding.

Diamonds

[Zack]

A lot of people really detest the diamond industry. I for one hate DeBeers, even more than I dislike Microsoft. At least Microsoft doesn't use slave labour, murder people, and abuse their workers. It's hard to justify a shiny peice of carbon with an artifically high price on it when you look at all the human rights violations the companies that mine them cause.

I know there's sociatal pressures that say you need to have a diamond. And why? Because DeBeers invented it!

http://www.africanfront.com/diamondboycott.php

There's one link, I'm sure you can find more with a quick google.

Utilitarianism

[Michael.Forman]

The concept that everything must have a function is indicative that you live in a capitalist society, which assigns value to objects which provide utility. That, which does not provide a function, is valued less than that, which does. I proffer, that a ring can be art for the sake of art without function and still have worth.

I assume you gravitate towards a utilitarian theme, as you are trying to avoid another vice of the capitalist middle class -- a flagrant display of wealth through the donning of ever-growing mass-produced gold rings with diamonds.

In an attempt to avoid both, my wife and I purchased our nontraditional rings at a modern-art museum. Thus finding something that didn't require the context of society to be of worth for its utilitarian appeal or it's perceived monetary value.

Good luck.

Re:Utilitarianism

[dubl-u]

geeks are products of a utilitarian society. why do you think geeks get paid so much? it's our utility to society (which is mirrored in his desire to seek functionality in his jewelry).

Oh, please. My dad got into programming long before it was fashionable or lucrative. And I started young, spending far too much of my youth in my basement, hacking away, without thought of lucre.

I do well programming, but for me it's something I can't not to, like a musician and his music. If I had a day job waiting tables, I'd still be writing code at night. And I frequently choose jobs that are interesting over ones that pay better.

Many of the most geeky people I know are budding scientists who work 60 or 80 hours a week for wages so low that it's probably illegal. But they don't care, because they're doing what they love, and they think of themselves as lucky.

And many of the most money-driven people I know aren't utilitarian at all. They spend absurd sums of money on fancy cars, fancy clothes, and big houses that they don't use, but only after spending more money decorating the place in shockingly un-useful ways.

So the notion that socially clueless geeks are the ones most influenced by society doesn't strike me as a very plausible thesis.

ringing

[obtuse]

I find sundial rings appealing. You should find several at these sites:

http://www.villagecraftsmen.com/SUNDIALS2.HTM
o r a larger picture of the design is here
http://www.uniquecanes.com/AstroKey1721.html

Since this is something you'll be spending your life with, you might have one made by a jeweler. In that case, it could be designed for your latitude.

A cipher key phrase or a circular slide rule of some sort could be put into a ring also. Any slide rule should translate into a circular slide rule, but on the scale of a ring, it would be quite small, and so not terribly easy to use.

Not to be too much of a sanctimonious PITA, but how does your fiancee feel about this? This is an object that symbolizes your commitment to each other. While I wear a wedding ring that I made, I certainly discussed it with my wife, because this ring is about us.

You might try to find a phrase worthy of inscribing on the ring, if a plain band seems useless to you. That could increase the personal meaning. You might think of other designs you care about, or something you find unique and beautiful. Don't underestimate the importance of beauty and personal meaning.

OK, I spent enough time writing this that other people have made the same points. I'll risk redundancy, and say my piece anyway.

FYI

[kinema]

Rings with compartments were very common durring the late 70's and the 80's. They were used for storing cocaine.

Not many suggestions so far...

[biglig2]

... in fact I'm afraid that if I put forward a practical idea I might be modded down as on topic.

Still, I have no idea if this is possible, but would it be possible to make two rings that can sense when they are near each other and change in some way? Let see now, transmitter, reciever, power source (tiny solar cell?) indicator (led? heating element? not a noice or a vibration otherwise it'll drive you mad being together) - it might be just do-able. The japanese are fond of those badges that do this.

Problem will be size of course, so perhaps this idea is not practicable, unless you both have big hands. ;-)

OK, then, perhaps you need something mechanical. Hmm. Perhaps something that you get when you fit both rings together? A key, perhaps?

Best suggestion so far is the guy with his SO's name engraved on one of those cool titanium rings. Sequence her DNA and write that on it!

When I got married...

[MrIcee]

...my wife and I wanted our rings to be something different and special. We were just out of college and pretty poor so we didn't have a lot of money to spend.

We found a local jewler and asked if he could fashion two gold rings in the shape of a mobius strip (a one sided one edged object). We showed him, out of paper, what a mobius strip was and what it could do. A month later, and for a total cost of $90 (in the 80's) we had two rings with a half twist. To make the rings comfortable and keep the twist in a certain place he had slightly flattened the underside of the ring so that it wouldn't ride around on our fingers. (for those interested, to make a one sided one edged solid gold object he created the twist in a mold and then poured the gold into the mold.)

I always liked the mobius strip rings... there is certainly symbolism in them (no 2 sides, but 1 side... 2 people working together as 1, etc...). Nobody else had anything like them and they were quite attractive.

Aloha Nui Loa for your upcoming wedding - hope to see you honeymoon here on the active volcano in Hawaii.

Upgrading?

[jbarr]

Don't forget that any technology that you put into the ring will probably become obsolete within a few years, so unless you are specifically planning on either upgrading the ring or upgrading your wife, I recommend going the traditional route.

What may seem novel or cool today will probably not seem so novel or cool 20 years from now. Remember that the ring is a symbol of your marriage. What ring you select should reflect what you value in your marriage and your spouse.

Re:Diamonds

[.milfox]

There's always synthetics. :P Same molecular arrangement, better quality, lot less exploitation. :P

IT has no value.

[Unknown Poltroon]

Youll be lucky to get 1/10 of what you paid for it. GOld jewelery alwasy sells at a little bit above melt value, and noone buys diamonds for anywhere close to what they sell them for. This has been repeately documented, but hasnt sunk into the brains of the populaion yet. Want resale value? Buy gold, silver bars and coins.

Re:IT has no value.

[shylock0]

noone buys diamonds for anywhere close to what they sell them for. This has been repeately documented, but hasnt sunk into the brains of the populaion yet.

This part of the parent post is entirely false. As a matter of fact, it highlights the most common misconception about diamonds.

Within the United States, you can buy a diamond for exactly what you can sell it for, no more, no less (otherwise, you couldn't buy and sell diamonds on eBay, for being able to buy something on eBay is defined as being able to buy it for what you can sell it for). If you buy a raw diamond for anything more than 1%-2% more than you can sell it for, you are being ripped off. Indeed, it is THAT fact which "hasn't sunk into the brains of the population yet". Diamonds are one of the most fungible goods known to mankind, even more fungible than gold (because the value of gold fluctuates widely and regularly, but the value of diamonds typically do not).

However, finished jewelry is different. A Diamond + A setting will ALWAYS cost more than the sum of the parts. If you're looking to buy a diamond ring, the best thing to do is to buy a diamond wholesale and take it to a jeweler to have a setting custom-made. Alternatively, sites such as BlueNile will allow you to buy a diamond and then have a setting made (although you will pay more than it is worth, you will not get as ripped off as with pre-finished jewelry.)

I first became interested in diamonds several years ago (when traveling to Russia and then Brazil) and have taken several courses in identifying and appraising diamonds from different Gem Labs in the US and overseas. One of the first things they taught us was the misconception in the parent post, and how to exploit it.

Scribe tool

[qengho]

A diamond ring has the inherent functionality of being able to score glass. With a little practice, she can become adept at permanent warchalking on the windows of businesses with poor wi-fi security.

Re:Real Women???

[Neck_of_the_Woods]

really? I have one that would rather have a trip to hawaii, surf for 10 days straight, put the little silver band around her finger and grin like a school girl hooped up on sugar.

You see bud, it is not about the diamond. It is about knowing your girl. Some women want the diamond to show it off, others want a basic ring with a huge ass story behind it that every time someone asks her why she does not have a diamond she launches into her month long surf trip around the pacific.

I have that girl, and I am going to keep her. You can have the one that wants the diamond.

I hope you got a real geeky one

[anthony_dipierro]

I have all sorts of high concepts about what this should represent and I keep coming back to the thought 'nothing which is useless can be truly beautiful'.

Just don't tell you fiance this when you have her in bed. She might start asking what her "use" is.

Money storeage: Diamonds have no resale value

[SomethingOrOther]

if anything happens she can sell the ring and live for a month

Very wrong unfortunately.
Diamonds have absoulutely no resale value worth speeking of. Have a look at this slashdot story
Yes a diamond could be used as a bribe, but you certainly can't live for a month on one.

Gold might be slightly better. Most jewlers will readily give money for 'scrap gold'. Althouh most survivalists will tell you how useless gold Kruger rands /soverigns etc are. Most banks wont accept them and jewlers will often just give 'scrap gold' value.

If you want jewlry as an emergency money source, try a necklace made of gold segments (or heavy gold chain) The segments can be broken off individually and sold / used for bribes.

Brass Knuckles: Beautiful and Functional

[monopole]

Brass Knuckles: Beautiful and Functional yet Inexpensive
Four times the rings, five times the impact

Holographic Ring

[monopole]

Embossed Holograms (the type that appear in credit cards) are produced by making a nickel shim from the original hologram (in photoresist) via electroplating Gold is sputtered on the resist and nickel is electroplated. If gold is built up instead a shim with the relief structure could be generated and incorporated into a gold ring. With a thin layer of protective material (perhaps a diamond CVD film) the ring could be extremely durable. A 3d image could be generated or a pattern that would be projected by a laser pointer. Very unique.

Some ideas...

[Christ-on-a-bike]

I'm going to buck the trend of bitching about your request, and instead offer some ideas for what to actually incorporate in the ring.

How about...

1. A flat part with a minute spirit level
2. A rad-counter (would have to contain a replaceable detector material)
3. A diamond - use to scratch glass, cars etc ;)
4. A coil of dental floss
5. An engraved protractor
6. A Cap'n Crunch decoder ring (the ring as 2+ moving parts)
7. (Tricky) make the ring resonate at an interesting frequency
8. (Old school) a signet ring
9. (Simple) marked edges - the ring can be flipped like a coin to make decisions
10. A tiny, hence probably useless, circular slide rule (link)
11. Neodymium!
12. An induction coil - for when she needs to make a quick electromagnet
13. (Cute, but not useful yet) a strand of your DNA - this way she can clone you
14. (Awful) an engraved copy of your pre-nuptial agreement ;)

How geeky is this woman exactly?

Puzzle rings

[moc.tfosorcimgllib]

If you want something cool, look at getting her a puzzle engagement ring. Those things are cool AND fun.

Re:Real Women???

[Deagol]

My wife told me that if I ever bought her gold or diamonds, she'd leave me. :) We both don't care for gold, and both traditionally wore silver before we ever met. She likes garnets, though.

We didn't do the engagement ring thing, and we bought 2 beautiful silver rings for our wedding bands. Total cost with shipping was just shy of $100. We're both proud of the cheapness factor, as we know the price of precious metals/stones is such a sham. Though, you'd be amazed at how many women turned their noses up at the rings. She doesn't care (that's my girl!) and neither to I. The rings are beautiful and we both love them, and that's all that really matters.

I got this ring, the knots symbolic of my science/math/mechanical nature. I'm the organized one in the pair; I bring order to the chaos. In turn, she has this ring, the ivy symbolic of her being the more "wild" of the two of us. She gets me out into the sun and has a better sense of adventure. We're a perfect match, and over the years our personalities have melded a bit, which goes well with silver (a highly malleable metal). I'm thinking for our 10th anniversary, we might get a new set of rings, but with both having the ivy and knots intertwined (that is, if the owner of this site will custom make them). We may even try to get them in platinum or tungsten, much more sturdy metals.

We've been married 5.5 years and are closer than ever.

Yeah, it's all symbolic, and has no utility value. But my going on about this is simply to illustrate that one can ditch the status quo and have much more meaningful symbolism than "Look! he spent 2 month's salary on this boring ring of gold with a fleck of clear rock on it!"

I encourage everyone to browse the site linked above: metalsmiths.com. The guy has rings made of meteorite that I'd like to get -- too cool! His work is truly unique.

My only suggestion for a practical ring would be either a sun dial type of ring (calibrated for your latitude, of course) or a very simple, solid and heavy ring of platinum which you could hawk if you ever got into a real jam. About the latter suggestion... I've ready to many "urban survival" threads in misc.survival. ;-)

The caves ....

[jotaeleemeese]

.... have an use, 15000 years ago, the paintings also.

Arts in any era fullfill many very important social functions.

Diamonds do, but the horrifying background of how that trade works should put off all but the most indecent people.