Slashdot Mirror
Microsoft Rolls Out iLoo
TommyTyker writes "According to this CNet article, Microsoft is using England as a test bed for the iLoo -- a 'PortaJohn' that allows the 'user' to surf the net while taking care of 'business.' MSN is even looking at getting TP manufacturers to create some of their product with URL's printed on them. Pooptastic!" Life does not imitate the Onion. No, sir.
I would not be using that! They don't seem to think about where they but the internet these days. Being inside one of these porta loos is not a place to spend quality internet time.
But it would be much better for the people waiting.
England is their testbed?
They should be taking it to Japan, where toilets are already equipped with countless unimaginable electronic doodads.
Accountability on the heads of the powerful.
Power in the hands of the accountable.
First of all, they had better encase those monitors in bullet-proof, unscratchable glass or they'll be vandalized instantly. How they'll protect the keyboards I can't imagine.
Secondly, I'd be disinclined to touch a keyboard in a loo under any circumstances, but even more so considering the pr0n-viewing factor. Nuf said.
"...all the labours of the ages, all the devotion, all the inspiration, all the noonday brightness..." yada yada
Its bad enough to use the keyboards at semi-public computer labs. But using the keyboard and mouse of a public toilet?
think of all the pr0n surfing one could do at a iLoo.
Apple releases the iTunes music store, a revolutionary (or at least *evolutionary*) way to buy music online.
Microsoft responds with a hygiene disaster, and a way to make sure there are a lot of people at public events banging on the doors of porta-potties and peeing their pants.
Way to go, Microsoft. You've hereby invented the WORST IDEA EVER. That's innovation.
I'm not a marketing guru, but isn't this the kind of brand association that you don't want?
Somebody should tell MS marketing department that The Onion, that published the following eToilet article, is a satirical (as in "do not take this stuff seriously") magazine.
A religious war is an adult version of a fight over who has the best imaginary friend
You know, this is the closest MSN has ever come to being where it belonged.
If senility was a race, I would win.
Exactly how clean will this thing be? Honestly, it sounds completely disgusting. There's a reason they made the keyboard waterproof, and that alone would be a good reason not to use it. I don't think I need to go into any more detail here.
Perhaps a better, cleaner idea would be to have a machine with voice recognition built in and no keyboard. One might have to limit the types of pages someone could view because of the limited environment, but I'd much more readily use that then ever pick up one of those disgusting keyboards.
Apparently to the portable potty at your local summer concert or festival.
I can see it now:
It's a summer concert, people drink alot of beer, the bathroom line is usually 15 minutes, you can see people crossing their legs they have to go so bad, and there you are, sitting on the damn toilet, browsing the web when you should be finishing your 'business'.
These porta-potties better have a secret back door for escaping...
"Can of worms? The can is open... the worms are everywhere."
What if your MS TP blue screens on you? How will you wipe your tukkus then?
Boobies never hurt anyone. - Sherry Glaser.
We all know MS puts out crap, but this is too much.
/. deems worthy of showing?
This is a hoax right? The reporter has been taken for a ride, and this is what
Anyone who has been in a porta-potty knows that the smell is so bad that you wouldn't stick around for Hotmail to finish loading, while you are making your download.
Why slashdot? Why not?
I could surf on http://www.microsoft.com/billgates for shitting easier!
This is a wonderful piece of Microsoft technology(tm) !
Hey, people routinely put food in that shelf at the back end of the grocery cart, where they also put kids in diapers...you gotta have faith.
rj
hmmm. 'i-loo' sounds suspiciously similar to 'i-tunes'. do i detect some corporate marketing jealousy/sh*t-flinging going on?
I sure hope it's not a touch-screen!
--TRRGrunnnnnnt! Laaaggg!
Anyhoo, I thought regular keyboards had a serious enuf problem with tests for fecal matter.
"Has [being a kidnapped teenage girl, raped repeatedly for months] changed you?" - Katie Couric to Elizabeth Smart
can you? I think this is the biggest practical joke I've seen in years, but they missed April 1 by a little more than a month.
... unless they're planning to charge per minute for it... hmmm, we have a long history of pay toilets...
This can't be serious because of all the obvious issues and problems that have been discussed both humorously and seriously ad nauseum in previous posts. Hygiene, hardware durability, monopolizing the facility, etc.
What kind of EULA are they going to have for this? Once you use their facility, you can't use any other toilet unless it's an MS approved toilet? They already want your first born male child, do they now want all your offal as well?
This can not be serious.
War is Peace. Freedom is Slavery. Ignorance is Strength. - George Orwell or George Bush?
They better be connected to broadband or its going to be a real pisser.