What's Microsoft Up To?

So, today's one of those days when every bit of news is dominated by Microsoft. To spare you six different stories about the Borg, we'll assimilate them all into this one. You have seen the stupid Passport hole in an earlier story; also the iLoo, although that hasn't stopped you from submitting stories about it, oh no. New news: a report paid for by Microsoft shows that Windows is a better server than Red Hat. A class-action suit has been filed charging that MSN and Best Buy combined to scam customers. The WINHEC conference is ongoing - Steve Ballmer says DRM is an opportunity, not a prison, the Xbox is going to be your home communications center, Wired talks about how hardware will be changed to imprison users, and once you're locked in to Microsoft you get to pay more each year. An article describes why user desktops are locked down. Oh, and here's another on DRM, just because.

Comments

iLoo dupe?

[Wrexen]

...although that hasn't stopped you from submitting stories about it, oh no

We know you're easily tricked :)

WINHEC

[s20451]

Is WINHEC where you go if you're darned for all eternity after pirating windows?

Re:WINHEC

[FuzzyBad-Mofo]

No, Windows pirates (arr!) are forced to run Windows ME in the afterlife. In Hell of course, but I repeat myself..

Re:WINHEC

[JorenDahn]

Is WINHEC where you go if you're darned for all eternity after pirating windows?

No, that's where you go when you install Windows.

pots and kettles

[Gingko]

"You have seen the stupid Passport hole in an earlier story; also the iLoo, although that hasn't stopped you from submitting stories about it, oh no."

With all due respect, it never stopped you posting stories about them either ;)

Henry

Re:What Happened to the tabletPC?

[clarkc3]

they decided the best way to get the tabletpc going was to mount it on the wall of a port-a-potty and call it iLoo

Re:Linux has drm!

[KoolDude]

It's called chmod!

Slow down there, cowboy. Wait till Stallman comes out with GNU/DLM - Digital Lefts Management

DRM an opportunity?

[tuffy]

I suppose if you try and bypass DRM, the DMCA will provide you an opportunity to go to prison.

WINHEL

[metamatic]

No, eternal damnation is reserved for those who pay money for Windows and hence support evil. Duh.

Knowing where to stop reading..

[Keck]

Microsoft commissioned VeriTest, a

One of those days...

[telstar]

"So, today's one of those days when every bit of news is dominated by Microsoft."

• Yeah, I think the forumla is:

• if(dayname.endsWith("day"))
  trash("Microsoft");
  else fail;

There are no hackers in Hotmail

[azcoffeehabit]

"There are no hacker infidels in Hotmail. Never!"

"My feelings - as usual - we will kill them all"

"Our initial assessment is that they will all die"

"I blame Slashdot - they are marketing for the Linux kernel!"

"God will roast their stomachs in hell at the hands of Microsoft."

"They're coming to surrender or be burned in their computerr rooms."

"No I am not scared, and neither should you be!"

"Be assured. Passport is safe, protected"

"Who are in control, they are not in control of anything - they don't even control themselves!"

"We are not afraid of the hackers. Allah has condemned them. They are stupid. They are stupid" (dramatic pause) "and they are condemned."

"The hackers, they always depend on a method what I call ... stupid, silly. All I ask is check yourself. Do not in fact repeat their lies."

"I can say, and I am responsible for what I am saying, that they have started to commit suicide under the walls of Hotmail. We will encourage them to commit suicide more quickly."

"I can assure you that those villains will recognize, will discover in appropriate time in the future how stupid they are and how they are pretending things which have never taken place."

"The authority of the Microsoft... issued a warning to the civilian population not to pick up any of those Linux Distrobutions because they are booby traps," he said, adding that Hackers were "immoral mercenaries" and "criminals" for such behavior.

"I am not talking about the American people and the British people," he said. "I am talking about Hackers. ... They have started throwing those emails, but they are not emails, they are booby traps to kill the children."

"We have them surrounded in their computer rooms"

"Muhammad Faisal Rauf Danka is all about lies! All he tells is lies, lies and more lies!"

"I have detailed information about the situation...which completely proves that what they allege are illusions . . . They lie every day."

"Lying is forbidden in Microsoft. Microsoft lawyers will tolerate nothing but truthfulness as they are men of great honor and integrity. Everyone is encouraged to speak freely of the truths evidenced in their eyes and hearts."

"Now even the Hacker command is under siege. We are hitting it from the north, east, south and west. We chase them here and they chase us there. But at the end we are the people who are laying siege to them. And it is not them who are besieging us."

Muhammed Saeed al-Sahaf
Microsoft Information Minister