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How to Become A Spammer
permeablepdx points to this story in The Oregonian about
how to become a spammer. Summary: "Local Oregon boy makes big bucks after learning from the Spam masters."
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Steps to become a better spammer:
1. Insert head in ass
2. Click "send"
3. Profit!
Next week its how to be a pimp, followed the week after by "mugging for fun and profit".
"How do you torture a spammer" would be more interesting.
Maybe tie him up on a light post and throw AOL CD's at him?
--
One by one the penguins steal my sanity...
He'd heard enough complaints about spam from his friends, but he never understood them. The junk mail his mail carrier delivers bothers him much more, Shiels said.
"It costs money to be processed. And it's a waste of trees. It's intrusive as hell because you have to go through all of it. People don't get mad about that, and I don't understand why," he mused.
Is anyone else thinking what I am thinking?
"Useless organic meatbag" -HK-47
"Because the hyperactivity caused a crash about every other day, Shiels monitored the computers all day."
Hmmm I guess the spam software is running on Windows.
Does anybody have a easy and effective way to stop spam mail reach the inbox?
On another note, anyone got any idea where these "spammer clubs" he mentions might be? I got this new toy I wanna try out...
Carousel is a lie!
Comment removed based on user account deletion
Here's a quote from the guy: "There's people who sit in their basements and have nothing better to do than get all upset about spam."
What total assholes these people are.
Here is an idea.. Whenever you get spam mail (the real kind that comes in your mailbox). Take those business reply mail envelopes and fill them with all the spam you can, and send it back. The heavier, the better. I have a few friends that do this. It helps out the postal service by giving them more money and it helps you to get your point across about the junk mailings.
Microsoft Windows runs on stress and frustration.
Wonder what his parents taste like?
I think it is time we find these sites and DOS em. Hunt them down in there homes, seize there puters place a couple gigs worth of metalica and Celene Dion mp3's on there drives. After place an anyonomus tip to the RIAA and let the wolves at the pigs.
Has anyone actually looked at what the business is that he's now in?
> "Defibworld is an authorized provider
> specializing in state of the art new and
> pre-owned AED's and Defibrillators at
> the lowest prices!"
Just what I want some hospital to be shocking my heart with: a "pre-owned" defibrillator purchased "at the lowest price"!
First you get bitten by an existing spammer, then you transform. You'll need to stay out of sunlight and avoid garlic, though.
Sub-rule: Spammers always lie about pushing pr0n.
One line blog. I hear that they're called Twitters now.
"Jeffrey Kosseff", jeffkosseff@news.oregonian.com, has written us a wonderful article short on facts and sadly devoid of technical information. This reminds me of one other Jeff K. I know--coincidence? Methinks not.
We recently had heard in the office over one of the Yellow Machine that's made by Anthology Solutions.
We do get lots of junk mail from the u.s. post office (they could easily filter that, but they don't), yet we complain about spam the most... why?
... hmm ... two real emails? On a good day?
Hmm, could it be that, in amongst the real snailmail that I get, there might be, hmm, three? Four? pieces of junk mail per week. Those are easy to deal with - in fact, in Seattle, we have curbside recycling pickup.
Whereas, inamongst the spam I get daily (averages close to 90 pieces per day, and one day, when I was busy actually having a life, I didn't check my mail for almost 12 hours, at which point my ISP actually shut down my account's email, and warned me about getting too much mail!), there might be as many as
See, I once posted on Usenet, and some genius in the newsgroup decided, as a favor to the community, to collect all the posters' email addresses, and ***list them on a Web site!*** (after which, the genius closed her own email account, so nobody can email her to remove their address). Between that, and my dear mother (bless her on this of all days!) who seems to think that emailed "greeting cards" are indeed free (and thusly signing me up for still more spam lists, as now they know that the address is valid).
Anybody wonder why I want an email program that uses a whitelist, and removes anything not on the list at the server level, before I even have to see it?
Lemon curry?
Doctor: "I'm sorry, we did everything we could, but the damn defibrillator we bought from a former spammer wouldn't work."
.. but .."
Patients Loved One: "Oh no...
Doctor: "Don't worry, it came with a 30 day warranty, we will get our money back."
I only look human.
My mother is a halfling and my dad is an ogre, so that makes me an Ogreling
"I know this all sounds like you're hiding yourself and doing this illegitimately, but the reason you have to do it is everybody tries to shut you down," Shiels said.
"I have to leave my crack in a drop-box for my distributors to sell at schools, and pick up my money from there. I know it sounds like I'm hiding and doing this all illegitimately, but I'm just a businessman, and the police are constantly trying to shut me down. What a bunch of pricks"
honestly i kind of feel bad for him, lets analyze his career moves so far
1. cop
2. web designer
3. spammer
4. online defibulator salesman
kind of a serious slide there, and i was feeling sorry for myself for my own career prospects. If he stays on track he'll probably be a clerk at a dirty magazine shop next.
Screw spamming...I wanna know how to become a Hollywood stuntman!
-BK
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